Wounds Of The Soul
by the-shiny-girl
Summary: Sequel to In the dark.  Hermione could not get him out of her mind or her soul. Lucius Malfoy was always in her thoughts.
1. Chapter 1

chapter 1** Prologue**

_Hermione could not look away from him. She needed to convince him and she hoped he would make a right choice._

_"Lucius, please," she pleaded, her voice shaking._

_"You are asking too much," was his only answer. Cold and hard._

_"I am not! This is your choice to make the right decision."_

_She could see his eyes darken and his lips part, but he said nothing. Hermione waited a few more seconds in silence, hoping he would change his mind, but his impenetrable stare was enough for her to realize she was not going to win this battle._

_All was lost. He was lost._

ooo

_Three months earlier_

Hermione awoke with a scream. Again.

She was used to it by now. Not one night since her return had gone by without her waking up in the middle of the night. Her heart was beating faster than usual and she had to take a few breaths to calm down. She did not want to wake up her parents. They have been through enough already.

Hermione bit her lip and threw a glance at the corner in the room. The place where the shadow had been a lot of times in the last few months. She could feel disappointment rise in her chest as she realized there was no one in the corner. She liked to think that he was there. Watching her. It made her feel better thinking he had not forgotten her. A part of her liked to think that he cared about her enough to visit her room every once and a while. It was horrible to think he moved on easily while she could not get him out of her mind.

Hermione slowly got up from the bed and quietly made her way to the bathroom. On the way there she threw a look at the clock on her nightstand. It was two in the morning.

When she was finally in the bathroom, she looked at herself in the mirror. One would expect she would look better after being home for a whole month and a half. The bruises were gone, but Hermione knew she still looked horrible. There were huge bags under her eyes and she had not gained weight as she was supposed to. She simply could not bring herself to eat. She had no appetite. Food made her sick. Her parents were worried about her behaviour. They could not be more happy when she came back. They thought they got back their daughter. Hermione Granger. The know-it-all, a nice and talkative girl. But after the first few days it became clear she was a different person now. They demanded explainations, but she could not give it to them. It was something personal. Something that would remain between her and Lucius. She could still remember their last conversation at three in the morning, when she woke up screaming.

_"Hermione, please, tell us what happened to you! Where were you?" her mum tried._

_"I-I-I can't….just leave it, please."_

_Hermione's dad stepped towards her, but Hermione flinched away from. A few days after her return she realized she was not comfortable with other man's touches, even if it was her dad's._

_"We want our little girl back," her mum whispered, tears in her eyes._

If they only knew what their little girl did. Got involved with a Death Eater, killed a man, betrayed what she believed in.

But what Hermione learned from everything she had been through, was that life was not a fairytale.

In the Wizard World she had been a slave, she had been tortured, humiliated. And now she was finally saved. She was back at home, with her parents. She should be happy, she could be grateful for the second chance at life that she got, because not many people did. But she was everything but glad. She did not feel like she belonged back home, she could not smile, she could not talk about normal things. And at the same time she was feeling an enormous guilt because she could see what it was doing to her parents. It would be better for them if she simply disappeared again.

"I am a mess," she said out loud, observing her reflection in the mirror.

She knew she would see Lucius again. Her story with him could not be finished just like that. But she did not expect it to happen that soon. Her entire body tensed as she realized she would have to find him. Sooner the better. She placed her hand on her stomach and let out a shaky sigh.

Lucius needed to know. He was the only one who could help her.

**A/N: Hi, guys! I am back! The story of Lucius and Hermione did not want to leave my head! So I decided to write a sequel, I don't know if you will like it or when will I be able to update. But I simply needed to get this published. Tell me what you think. :)**


	2. A Part Of Him

Chapter 1

**A PART OF HIM**

She was never a fan of the dark or lonely nights. Of course, she was always a bit of a loner, rather enjoying an interesting book than hanging out with others. She simply was not that kind of a girl. She liked loneliness, but somehow she never liked nights. The dark made her feel small and vulnerable. And ever since she found out about magic her imagination had no boundaries. She could imagine all the horrible things that waited in the dark. But all that changed after the War. When she was blinded, all she had was the darkness. It was her home. She was used to it.

Hermione lay in her bed, gazing up at the ceiling as she caressed her belly slowly. She sighed and closed her eyes, trying to imagine how his hands felt on her body. Those large hands, pale, precise... Sliding across her flesh in measured movements, every part of her touched, examined, explored. His eyes cold and filled with unexplained emotions. He always was a mystery to her.

Her eyes snapped open as she caught herself thinking about him again. What was wrong with her? Could he not leave her mind alone for just a few minutes?

Hermione looked at the clock on her bedside table. It was three o'clock in the morning and she was still awake. Thinking. Remembering. It was killing her not knowing anything. Not being able to know what was happening in the Wizarding World, what was happening to Ginny, to _him_. She could not sleep at night, knowing that any moment the Death Eaters could attack the Muggle World. Even though Lucius gave her his word, she could not be sure. Why would anyone trust a Death Eater?

But he seemed to be keeping his word. It had been a month and a half since she returned to her home and nothing dangerous had happened. Yet.

ooo

"Hermione, honey, come down for breakfast!" her mum called from downstairs.

Hermione let out a tired sigh, not moving from the spot on her bed. She sat at the edge of it, not moving, staring at the corner of the room. The corner where she had seen the _shadow_ a few times ever since she'd returned home. Hermione was a smart girl, she did not believe in something if she did not have the evidence about it. But even though she could not prove he had been visiting her, Hermione could just feel _something_. Those few times when she woke up in the middle of the night and noticed someone standing in her room….what was that? Was her mind playing tricks with her? Was she that desperately dependent on him? She needed to know. She could not spend the rest of her life wondering if Lucius Malfoy was paying visits to her at night. Just the thought of him standing in her dark room, watching her sleep, maybe sitting on her bed, caressing her….

"Hermione!" her mum called again.

"Just a minute!" Hermione called back, not feeling hungry, but she did not want to worry her mum. She had been through enough already.

ooo

Pancakes. Hermione always loved pancakes. But what was wrong with her now? Why could she not enjoy the taste of them? Why did she feel sick just by looking down at her plate?

"Hermione, why are you playing with your food? Don't you like what I made?" Mrs. Granger asked her daughter, worry and hurt evident on her face.

"N-No, mum, it's not that. I'm just…"she paused for a moment, "I'm just not feeling that well, that's all."

"Are you sick? You are a bit pale-" her mum tried to touch her forehead to check for temperature but Hermione flinched away from her.

"I'm not sick, just…" she muttered under her breath, "I'll go lay down for a bit."

She stood up and made her way to leave the kitchen.

"I hope one day you will trust me enough to tell me what happened to you," Hermione's mum said quietly.

Hermione closed her eyes for a second before putting a smile on her face and turning around, facing her mother:"Mum, nothing happened to me. Trust me, I have just not been sleeping well lately, that's all."

With those words she walked out of the kitchen and upstairs into her room. Her room was her hiding place now. She did not like to go outside, the world frightened her. The noise, the cars, the people. It was all too much. For months she had been kept in a room. She got used to the silence and loneliness. The real world was too much for now.

ooo

It was night again. Hermione stood in front of her mirror, looking at herself. She had to face the truth. She could not spend the rest of her life in her room, hiding from people and ignoring what was happening to her. She recognized the symptoms. She was feeling sick, could not stand the sight of food, her monthly visitor hadn't visited in a quite a while.

_Oh god._

It seemed much more real now. For the first few weeks she blamed it on the everything she had been through. But now she had to accept it. There was a big possibility there was something of Lucius Malfoy inside of her.

She did not know how to feel about that. It seemed wrong to be disgusted with it, but at the same time she could not feel anything positive. She did not want to be….she could not even say the word.

_"Tell me, Mudblood...Do you enjoy knowing that you have the ability to give birth? That it is your blood that enables life to continue?" his tone then got darker, "It's a shame, really. Scums like you should not be allowed to reproduce."_

Hermione could not believe how destiny played with them both. Lucius hated Mudbloods and spent his life erasing them from this World and now a Mudblood was carrying his child. She almost laughed at the irony.

_"Suffice to say that I would never allow a half breed into the Malfoy family."_

_"What would you do if it did happen?" Hermione asked._

_"I would terminate it immediately," he said emotionless, "I already had a son."_

There was no doubt what he would do if he found out. Hermione did not expect him to turn into a loving and caring man. He was Lucius Malfoy. But at the same time he was the only one she could turn to for help. She could not tell her parents. Never. She could not tell a doctor. She did not exist in the Muggle World. Her documents were destroyed once she started attending Hogwarts, because her parents would have problem explaining why their eleven year old daughter was not going to school.

There was nothing she could do. No one she could ask for help. Except him. At the same time she did not know what kind of help she expected from him. He could kill her. Or terminate the…._pregnancy_. How strange it sounded. And then what? Would she return to the Muggle World? She did not belong there anymore. She had a purpose in life. And that purpose was not living in the Muggle World and hiding in her room. She had a _mission_. Harry and Ron and everyone who died expect her to finish their job. To free the Wizarding World. Hermione knew the battle was still not over. She just did not know what to do to help.

As far as she knew, there was no Resistance anymore. Of course, there were still a few rebells, people who did not want to succumb to Death Eater's will. But how to contact them? Where to start?

Hermione's had was spinning from all those questions, all those problems. First she needed to get back into the Wizarding World. Voldemort was gone and Lucius and Snape took his place. Hermione somehow felt she could make a difference if she only could get to Lucius. It was beyond her why she thought she could change his mind, destroy his prejudices. As she said some time ago- She and Lucius could not live at the same time. One had to die. Good against evil. She against Lucius. She knew the time would come. But she did not expect to carry his child!

Hermione took a deep breath and walked to the bed, sitting down. She had to think of something. But it could wait until the morning. She was beyond tired and sleepy. She slipped under the covers and smiled as she noticed Crookshanks sleeping peacefully at the end of the bed. She yawned and only a few minutes later she was asleep as well.

_"Mudblood," he breathed against her ear, "You need me as much as I need you."_

_Hermione could hear his voice, but could not see a thing. It was as if she was blind again. A shiver ran through her body at the sound of his cold voice. _

_"You never should have left, your place is with me. You know it."_

_"Lucius-"_

_"You will come back to me."_

_"Are you real?" she asked, her voice shaking. Everything was so confusing._

_She heard him let out a short laugh before replying:"You will come back to me," he paused for a moment, "You have something of mine."_

Hermione jerked awake suddenly, pulling herself into a sitting position. It was only a dream. Only a dream. She wipped the sweat from her forehead, trying to calm her breathing. But then she heard Crookshanks growling at something. He only did that when he was angry or feeling threatened.

"Shh, what's wrong?"Hermione whispered to her pet, reaching over and stroking his head, trying to calm him down. But he did not react to her touch, still hissing and growling. When Hermione took a better look at him she realized he was looking at something in specific. He was staring at the corner of her room as if he was looking at someone. As if someone was there, someone unknown. A chill ran down her body at that realization. It was dark in the room and she could not see anything. She took Crookshanks into her arms, feeling safer that way. She fixed her eyes in the corner of the room, noticing something there. It could be her mind playing tricks with her again, but it could be something else. Why else would Crookshanks be reacting that way?

She _had_ to know. She needed to check. With a deep breath she slowly pulled the covers down her body and got up from the bed. She was shaking heavily, she was even afraid she would drop Crookshanks down as she could not control her body. With her eyes wide open, she slowly she walked towards the corner.

**A/N: Hey, you guys! Thank you all so much for the support! It is nice hearing you love this story as much as I do! In the Dark was a dark story, but this one will be even darker, even more depressing. Prepare yourselves for a ride. :)**


	3. Long Time No See

Chapter 3** Long time no see**

She stood still for a few long moments, simply observing the darkness in front of her. She was shaking badly, the nerves were killing her. Somehow she felt safer with her cat in her arms, but that did not last long. With a growl Crookshanks wriggled out of her embrace and jumped onto the floor, disappearing from her sight.

"Crooks!" Hermione called out, but it was pointless.

Sher could hear her own heartbeat, it felt as if her whole body was beating. Slowly she took another step towards the corner, never taking her eyes off of it. She was surrounded by darkness, but it was not the darkness what terrified her. It was the thing that was hiding in the darkness.

"Who's there?" she asked, her voice breaking miserably.

When no answer came, she decided to gather her courage and see for herself what was there. If something was there. With a deep breath she quickly took a few steps towards the corner and then she bumped into something. And it was not the wall. She never expected it to be that close to her.

Suddenly she was grabbed by someone and turned around she that her back was now against the wall. She could not even scream, she was in too much of a shock for that. Her eyes were wide open, desperately trying to see what was in front of her, but could not make out anything. It was a man, that she could tell. And his smell was….it was familiar to her. It had to be…_him_. Hermione could feel his entire body being pressed against hers, pushing her into the wall.

She swallowed down, hard, her breath coming in short, terrified gasps. But what if it was not him? What if it was someone else?

Hermione struggled against him, them opened her eyes to scream. But before a scream could escape her, a large hand clamped over her mouth, choking off the sound. He was wearing gloves. That reminded her of….but he was not the only person who wore gloves.

"Quiet," he said to her quietly.

Hermione could not believe her ears. She recognized that voice. It was his voice. Velvet and refined. It still had a tone of authority in it as Hermione remembered. She could feel his hot breath on her neck. He was standing completely still.

It was him. Hermione did not know what to do, what to say. And she could not say anything, because he would not let her. Did he think she would scream if he removed his hand? Would she? Even she herself did not know the answer to that question. For the last few weeks all she wanted was to see him again, to speak to him. But now she did not know what to say. Why was he in her room? Why was he watching her?

Before she could do anything, she felt a wand being pressed to her forehead.

"Luc-" she mumbled, trying desperately to to do something. Anything. Why was he pointing his wand at her?

He slowly removed his hand from her mouth and Hermione took that as an opportunity to speak.

"Please, we need to-"

ooo

Hermione woke up to her mum calling her for breakfast. She yawned as she threw a glance at the clock. It was almost eleven o'clock in the morning. She had never slept that long. When did she go to bed last night anyway? It surprised her that she could not remember. All she could remember was thinking about Lucius, lying in the bed and then…nothing. How strange. She conclueded she had probably been very tired and sleepy, not even realizing when she fell asleep.

ooo

It was Monday, which meant Hermione was home alone all day long. Most of the time she simply sat in the living room, staring into nothing and thinking. She did not feel like going out. What would she do outside, anyway? She had no friends anymore. She knew no one.

She took a deep breath, her thoughts once again on Lucius. How could she see him again?

If she could at least get in contact with him somehow. If he knew she needed to talk to him…would he come to her?

Was he even alive? The world he lived in was dangerous. While living with him, Hermione witnessed the times when he was on the edge of death. But Lucius knew how to handle himself. He was alive. He had to be.

ooo

The screams and cries were heard throughout the Manor. Lucius Malfoy looked down at the man laying at his feet who was shaking violently under the Cruciatus Curse. A few moments later he lifted the curse off of him, repeating the question.

"Where are the rest of your pathetic group hiding?" Lucius asked calmly.

The man spat out blood, barely missing Lucius' boots. Lucius' lips curled up in disgust.

"I-I will tell you nothing…."

Lucius took a deep breath through his nose, annoyance showing on his face. The man he was torturing was thirty-something, he was charged with gathering and encouraging people to rebel against the new authority- The Death Eaters. He was brought to the Malfoy Manor early in the morning along with a couple of others Mudbloods and Bloodtraitors. Lucius could not understand why people kept on forming organisations to fight against them. They were always destroyed before they could even take a first step in the fight against them.

"I am giving you a minute to think about your answer," Lucius said to the man, then looked around. There were a couple of other Death Eaters in the dungeon, they all had their own victim to torture and get information out of. All except Severus Snape. He was standing in the corner, simply observing the situation in the dungeon, an unreadable expression on his face. Lucius was already used to the fact that Severus never involved himself in the violence. He was much more refined for something like that.

"Cowards!" a small voice cried out and Lucius' head turned in the direction of it. He noticed a girl on the floor, clutching her stomach as a Death Eater kicked her again, making her cry out in pain. Suddenly he had a flashback. He could clearly see the scene in his mind. The first time she had called him a coward.

_Rodolphous was on top of her, grinning as he pushed the robe up, exposing her thighs. She screamed at the top of her lungs:"You bastards! You bloody bastards!"_

_Lucius seemed calm, but the truth was he was burning on the inside. He felt angry seeing how his collegues touched his reward. She was his, yet he had to teach her a lesson. So he stood completely silent, hoping she would learn to be obedient before the situation went to far. Her body was now racked by violent sobs, he could tell. _

_"You coward," she whispered and this time she meant only one person. Lucius knew she was speaking to him. She dared to insult him. She really was brave. Or stupid. _

_Not even now, a few months later, Lucius knew if he would have let the Death Eaters have their way with her if she had not begged him to help her. Would he really have done it? Or was he that obsessed with her even then at the very beggining?_

"Tell us the names!" the Death Eater ordered and Lucius was brought back into reality.

"N-no!" she barely managed to say.

Lucius completely froze as he observed the girl. She was very young, she had probably attended Hogwarts. Her blouse was ripped open, she was bare foot. Her hair was long and brown, a bit messy. She was just like….

"Tell us the names, Mudblood!"

Lucius flinched as the Death Eater kicked her in the stomach again, making the girl cry out even harder.

"William!" he suddenly growled, making the Death Eater stop and look at him. In a few quick strides he reached them, his face angry.

"What is it, Lucius?" William asked, surprised.

Lucius looked down at the girl. Her face was nothing like _her's_. It was a completely different girl. Lucius took a deep breath, trying to get a hold of himself. By now everyone had stopped and were now looking at him.

The girl whimpered and turned her head up, meeting Lucius' eyes. No, she was nothing like _her_. But there was something in her eyes. Courage. Rebellion. Pride.

It angered him. Just like _she_ always angered him.

"Lucius?" William asked again, this time suspicious.

"Continue," he simply answered, sending the girl a cruel look before turning and walking away. He had to control himself. One wrong move and his position could be at risk. How was it possible that one filthy Mudblood had such influence over him? Maybe he should not have let her go. The best decision would be to kill her and get over with everything.

It was eating him up, knowing she was still alive, still breathing. She was still somewhere, living her life and he could not control her anymore. Maybe he should pay her a visit and end it all. He knew they could not live in the same world at the same time.

**A/N: Hello, guys. I just want to tell you how great you've been and how happy I am that you support my story the way you do. I apologize for the length of the chapter, but I promise it will get longer as I get into the story. :)**


	4. The Return

**A/N: Hello, guys! Finally an update! This chapter is longer as I promised. The story really begins here and chapters will only get longer and longer. And now onto the story! :)**

Chapter 4 **The Return **

The life seemed to drag on unbelievably slowly. One day felt like a month. A month of boredom and despair. Hermione did not like her life. It was a life without a goal, without a purpose. She could not do anything else beside sit at home and think. Think about the past and the future. It struck her that her life was more meaningful when she was with Lucius. At least then she tried to do something good, she tried to convince him what was right and what was wrong. But what was she doing now? Nothing.

Deep inside her she knew there would come the time when she would have to return to the Wizarding World. But she did not know it would happen that soon.

It was the first week of November. The nights were getting colder and the weather was gloomy. It did not exactly help improve Hermione's mood. She still did not want to admit to anyone her secret. Even she herself did not want to believe it yet. She had to face the truth, but it was easier to ignore it as long as she could. But soon it would start showing. And Hermione did not even want to think about what would happen then. What could she do, say?

Because of her condition she was often feeling sick. There were many times when she woke up in the middle of the night, but this time not because of the nightmares, but because of the weird feeling in her stomach. A few times it got that bad she had to throw up, emptying her stomach then sitting on the bathroom floor, waiting for the sickness to pass.

It was one of those nights. After sitting on the cold bathroom floor for almost an hour, Hermione headed to the sink, turned on the taps and splashed cold water on her face. Feeling the icy coolness of the water, she sighed in relief, feeling a bit better. Avoiding to look at herself in the mirror, she walked back into her room.

"Miss Granger."

Hermione jumped at the voice, then shrieked at the top of her lungs, her heart almost escaping out of her chest at the sight in front of her.

Severus Snape.

He was standing next to her bed, wearing his usual black robes and looking at her. Hermione covered her mouth in shock. For a few long moments she could not speak. She simply stood there with her eyes wide open, her whole body trembling from the shock. Snape did not speak, but was much more calmer than she was. He did however look alarmed when there was a knock on the door.

"Hermione, dear, are you alright? We heard a scream?" Hermione's mum's voice could be heard from the other side of the door.

"I-I-" Hermione stuttered, still not removing her eyes from Snape. She was afraid he would disappear if she looked away.

"Hermione? Open the door," her father said, worry evident in his voice.

"Are you r-real?" Hermione asked quietly.

Snape nodded, then motioned towards the door, "I wish to speak to you. Alone."

Hermione understood what he was trying to say and hurried towards the door, not opening them, "Mum, dad, I'm fine. I-I just had another nightmare."

She knew they would believe her, it was nothing unusual for her to wake up in the middle of the night screaming.

"Are you sure you are alright?" her mum asked, "Why won't you open the doors?"

Hermione looked back at Snape and whispered:"Hide in the bathroom. It'll just take a minute."

A few seconds later she opened the door and was met with worried faces of her mum and dad.

"Honey," her mum started, "You look so pale. Are you sure you are alright?"

"I am, really," she answered and offered them a weak smile.

"I don't like this. It's been going on for too long. We should take you to a doctor," Mr. Granger said.

Panic shot through Hermione:"No! I-I don't want to go see a doctor. I'm fine."

"You aren't, Hermione. It's not normal to have nightmares every single night. You look sick. Do you have temperature-" her mum tried to touch her forehead, but Hermione flinched away.

"I'm feeling better, I'm just sleepy. Can we talk about it in the morning?" she asked, looking at them pleadingly.

"Alright, honey. But we will talk about it," her mum replied, "Try to get some sleep."

Hermione smiled and nodded:"I will, don't worry. Good night."

With that she closed the doors and waited a few moments for her parents to return to their bedroom before turning around and facing Snape.

He walked out of the bathroom and stopped a few steps away from Hermione. They were both silent. Hermione waited for him to speak. What was he doing here? Was he really here or was she dreaming? If she was not dreaming, then why was he here? Had something happened?

_Breath, Hermione, breath._

It all felt surreal. For over a month she was cut of from anything magical. She even doubted that everything with Lucius ever even happened. Maybe it was all her imagination. Maybe the Wizarding World existed only in her head. But there he was, standing before her. A man that taught her for six years, Potions Master, a traitor, a Death Eater, Severus Snape. He was a living proof, that it did happen.

"You have been having nightmares?" he simply asked, raising an eyebrow.

Hermione nodded:"Ever since I returned."

"Understandable."

She could feel his eyes on her body, observing her, deep in his thoughts. Suddenly it occurred to her. What if he could tell she was-? No, it was impossible. No one could tell yet.

"You do not look healthier than the last time I saw you," he stated.

Hermione shifted uncomfortably under his gaze and crossed her arms over her chest:"What…" she tried again, "What are you doing here?"

"As it so happens, we are in need of your help," he said to her.

"_My_ help? Who are _we_? What is going on?" Hermione raised her voice.

"Calm down, Granger," Snape ordered in his usual cold voice,"I will explain everything."

Hermione took a deep breath and waited. Everything felt like a dream. It was in the middle of the night, the room was dark, there was Severus Snape in front of her, in her room, talking to her. And why was there that illogical feeling that she could trust him? Why didn't he strike her as a dangerous Death Eater as the rest of them? Why couldn't she see evil in his eyes? Was he that good of an actor? He had to be. He had fooled Dumbledore. He had fooled the whole Order.

Snape let out a tired sigh and asked:"How much do you know about Dumbledore's death?"

Hermione winced at the mention of that. How dare he? How could he mention something like that? If she hadn't had to worry about her parents she would have raised her voice at him.

"I know that you killed him!" she whispered, "Why are we talking about-"

"Is that all, Miss Granger?"

"Is there more?" she demanded, "I know what I need to know."

Snape rolled his eyes at her statement, then looked around the room:" You better sit down. This may take a while."

"What do you mean?"

"I am about to tell you something important. Something that may change your life, change your opinion of me and perhaps give you a purpose in this life."

She should not believe anything that came out of his mouth. But them why did she sit down and listened to what he had to say? There was something that told her there was more to Severus Snape than met the eye.

ooo

"Oh," was all Hermione could say after Snape had stopped talking. He was glaring at her, waiting for her reply, but she was unable to give one.

"Miss Granger?" he asked impatiently, "We do not have the whole night."

"What do you want from me?" she asked quietly, deep in her thoughts.

Was he telling her the truth?

What if he was lying? But why would he?

"I need an answer," Snape said to her, "Do you trust me or not?"

"I-I don't know."

He took a deep breath through his nose then nodded:"If you do not believe me, then you leave me with no other choice than to Obliviate you."

Hermione stood up from the bed, anger showing in her voice:"So you do not leave me a choice? Either believe you or you will just erase the memories of this conversation?"

He did not answer for a few long moments.

When he spoke his tone was calm:"We cannot risk it. We cannot have you knowing about everything."

"Who is we?" Hermione demanded.

"First I need to hear your answer."

Hermione could not believe how stubborn he was. He was not telling her everything, yet he expected her to believe him.

"Do I believe you," she repeated his question, "Do I believe that you killed Dumbledore on his own orders, that you are in fact a spy and that you are still working for the Light?"

He nodded.

Hermione looked up at him sadly,"I can't believe you because it is impossible. You can't be working for the Light."

"And why is that?"

"Because the Light does not exist anymore," she answered truthfully.

She wanted to believe him. It would be so much easier if she simply believed his words, if she allowed herself to hope again, but she could not.

"It does, Miss Granger," Snape said, "The organization is much smaller but we do exist. And we are slowly progressing."

Hermione looked up at him, hope in her eyes, but at the same time disbelief.

"We had already disposed of Voldemort and- "

Hermione cut him off:"Lucius killed him."

It was strange using his name again. It made everything more real.

"But we made him do that. I convinced him," Snape explained, his dark eyes boring into hers.

Hermione shook her head:"Voldemort killed his family, that's why- "

"That did help. However, if there was not for me, Lucius never would have done what he did."

Hermione remained silent, needing the time to precess everything. After a few long moments Snape sighed and pulled out his wand.

"Wait! Don't-" Hermione panicked, "I-I believe you."

Snape looked deep into her eyes and she held the contact.

"I truly hope you are not lying, Miss Granger."

"I'm not."

She decided to believe him. What other choice did she have and what damage would it do to her?

"What I don't understand is why you came here?" she asked then added, "Why are you telling me all this?"

"Because, Miss Granger," he started, "We need your help."

Hermione narrowed her eyes in surprise, waiting for him to continue.

"We need a spy," he finally let out.

"You-"

"We need someone that could be close to Lucius, someone to live in the same house as he, someone who could watch him when we cannot."

Hermione opened her mouth in shock, not believing her ears.

"You want me to- to go back there?" she managed to ask.

"Yes."

Hermione closed her eyes for a second:"You want me to go back to the house where so many horrible things happened to me? You want me to go back to him?"

Snape's voice softened a bit and it surprised Hermione.

"It is your choice. I am not forcing you into anything," he said, then added quietly, "Life of a spy is dangerous and it's hard. But it is what one must do."

Hermione shook her head in disbelief:"I can't believe it. I never expected…."

"I need an answer."

"When?"

It was all happening too fast, she needed to think, she needed to….

"Now."

Hermione looked up at him, eyes wide open:"What? You can't expect me to make this decision in a couple of minutes."

"Granger-"

"How would I be able to go back to him?"

"We already have a plan which would take you directly back there," Snape explained,"All we need is your answer."

Hermione couldn't think, she couldn't decide. It was too big of a decision, especially now when there was a big chance she was carrying something of Lucius. But maybe that was the solution she was waiting for. She did not know what to do, how to get in contact with him. And now there was Snape, offering her to bring her back to him.

She was frightened. Was she ready for Lucius? Was she ready for that kind of life again? But it would not be the same, she reminded herself. Now she would not be just a helpless Mudblood, she would be a spy, she would be working against him, trying to bring him down. She knew that day would come, but still she was not completely ready.

"But I just escaped from him," she said quietly.

"Granger," Snape started, "I cannot promise you that it will not be risky, but I assure you we will pull you out if it becomes too dangerous."

"What do you mean dangerous?" she asked carefully, "A slap?"

Snape did not answer.

Of course they would not put everything at risk simply because of a slap.

"A beating? A Crutiatus?"

Still, he did not answer, simply glared at her.

"Then when would you intervene?" she demanded.

Snape sighed and took a step closer to her:"We cannot promise you anything, but we would not let you lose your life."

"But you can't promise anything," Hermione repeated weakly, her face pale.

"No one promised me anything when I decided to live this kind of life," Snape admitted, "It is dangerous, but it might help if you think how much good could you do. We could bring the whole organization down. No more Death Eaters."

He was right. She could help. She could make a difference. Her life could have a meaning. She was not born to sit at home, doing nothing. This was the opportunity she was waiting for.

"What about my parents?"

"We would Obliviate them, they would have no memory of you."

It hurt her to play with her parent's minds like that but it really was the only option. If they did not know she existed, she would not be able to miss her. They wouldn't feel a thing. That would be the best for them. She could see concern and disappointment on their faces every time they looked at her. She couldn't be the daughter they wished for. Not while there are Death Eaters ruling in the Wizarding World. Not while her mind is constantly elsewhere.

"When?" she asked.

"Tonight," Snape replied, "We mustn't lose time."

Hermione took a deep breath and tried to stop the trembling. If she was going to do this, she needed to be strong.  
>"Alright," she finally let out.<p>

"Are you sure? There is no turning back," he warned her.

"I'm sure," she quickly answered before she changed her mind, "My parents' bedroom is across the hall."

"You do not want to say your goodbyes?" he asked in surprise.

Hermione shook her head, tears welling up in her eyes,"I need to be alone for a bit."

She heard Snape leave the room, then she allowed herself to look around. She was leaving again. But this time she decided so. She noticed Crookshanks sleeping peacefully on the bed, not at all disturbed by her conversation with Snape.

Then she heard a short scream, coming from her parents' bedroom.

"Mum," she stood up quickly, then stopped.

No one was hurting them, she had to remind herself. They were probably frightened as Snape entered the room. Nervously, she looked down at herself and noticed she was wearing her pajamas. She couldn't go anywhere like that. She had to change. Grabbing a pair of jeans and a shirt, she ran into the bathroom, closing the doors behind her. She somehow closed her mind, not allowing herself to think about what she was doing. It felt right, but at the same time it was frightening.

As she exited the bathroom, Snape was already standing in her room, arms crossed, looking at her.

"Are they-?"

"Asleep," he answered, "They are going to be alright," he added as he noticed the worry on Hermione's face.

"Where you you taking me?"

"To my Manor," he said and offered her his hand.

Hermione nodded and took a shaky breath. I can do this. She took his hand and the next moment her body was being pulled into different directions, but on the inside. Just when she thought she could take no more it finally stopped. She could feel the floor beneath her again, but she closed her eyes, waiting for the sickness to pass. The last thing she wanted was to throw up all over Snape.

"We are here," she heard him say, but didn't reply.

Instead she leaned onto his arm for support, hating how weak she felt at that moment.

"Are you alright?" Snape asked, slightly surprised.

"It's just…it's been a while since the last time…" she lied and opened her eyes. She did not want him to know about her condition, not yet. Not now, when she did not know what to expect.

"The study is that way, come along," he said to her and Hermione obeyed, walking behind him and trying to get a hold of herself.

Take deep breaths. It will pass.

When she was finally seated in a chair in Snape's study room, she allowed herself to relax. Looking around she noticed there was no clock.

"What time is it?"

"Four in the morning," he replied, "Would you like something to drink?"

Hermione shook her head.

"Something to eat?"

She grimaced and shook her head again.

Snape found that interesting but he let it pass for the moment.

Hermione realized that this was the first day of her new life. The first day of a difficult journey. A journey that might end her life.

"So," she started, "What do I need to know?"

ooo

It was already five o'clock in the morning and both Snape and Hermione were still in the study, discussing.

"We are not having meetings in my Manor, for obvious reasons," he explained, "There is a place in the Knockturn Alley."

"Will I-"

He cut her off:"No, I cannot take you there. Someone might recognize you. It would be too dangerous."

She sighed in annoyance:"Then what can I do? When and how will I meet Lucius again?"

She could not hide the anxiety at she said that. Just the thought of seeing him again, speaking to him, being close to him seemed surreal.

"We planned on making a big entrance."

"Meaning?" she was becoming sleepy already, she had barely slept anything in the last few days.

"The best would be to throw you in the Diagon Alley where you would get yourself captured."

"How?"

"Simply walk around without your collar. You will be captured and brought into the Malfoy Manor for questioning."

Hermione narrowed her eyes in confusion:"Collar?"

"Yes," he nodded, "Every Muggle in the Wizarding World has to wear a collar with the name of their master on it. Being without one is considered a serious crime."

Hermione could not hide the disgust she felt at his words. Muggleborns were treated as animals. It had to be stopped.

"So what happens when I am in the Malfoy Manor? And what makes you think they won't just kill me in the Diagon Alley?"

"They are not allowed to. Every suspect needs to be brought to a questioning."

Hermione nodded, then asked what was the most important to her.

"And then what? Once I'm at the Malfoy Manor, what happens next?"

"This is where you act. You need to convince Lucius to take you as his slave again, you do anything to regain you position as his reward," Snape explained in a dark tone.

"So many things could go wrong," she said quietly, afraid for her own safety.

"I understand that you are afraid, but-"

She did not let him finish:"You don't have to say anything. I understand what I have to do."

Snape remained silent. Hermione looked up at him and asked:"When?"

"Today."

That fact frightened her even more, but she said nothing. Just yesterday was she in her room, bored, but safe and today she was heading to the Malfoy Manor to be treated as a slave again.

"If I see him again, how will I explain my return to this world and what I was doing in the Diagon Alley?"

"Tell him someone brought you there. Someone from the Resistance and that you were waiting to meet the other members there. That will remove any suspicion from the Knockturn Alley and convince Lucius that our Headquarters are in the Diagon Alley."

Hermione listened, feeling her fear grow with each second. Lucius would be furious with her.

"So I am to made him think I was contacted by the Resistance?"

"You were," Snape smirked, "That will not be a problem to act, will it?"

She met his dark eyes and said quietly:"He will want names from me."

"You will not give him any," was Snape's simple answer.

"He has his methods of finding out," Hermione said, realizing what she had to go through.

"He will accept that you know nothing."

"But it might take a while," Hermione spoke as she was lost in her thoughts.

Snape did not say anything. He did not comfort her. Anything he said would be a waste of time. He knew exactly what awaited her. So did she. But there was no other way.

"How is Ginny?" Hermione suddenly asked, feeling the need to change the subject. She could see the question took Snape by surprise, but he quickly composed himself. He cleared his throat and looked away before answering.

"She is alright."

Hermione noticed something was off.

"What is it?" she demanded, "Tell me."

"Many things have changed since you left the Wizarding World."

"Like the collars?"

Snape nodded, then added:"And a Marriage Law."

"Excuse me?" she didn't know if she heard him right.

"Marriage law. Every Death Eater that has a Pureblood for a reward, needs to marry her or him."

Hermione could not believe him:"That's insane! When? And have you married already?"

"Believe me, Miss Granger, I could not agree more. It is insane. But it is the law," he explained in a dark tone, then added, "And no, we haven't married yet. I am giving her a choice."

"A choice between?"

"Between marriage with me and inevitable death."

Hermione stood up furiously:"That is not a choice!"

"I cannot help her. It is the law. If she refuses, the new Minister of Magic will sign her death sentence."

Hermione could feel blood boiling in her veins. Her own memories returned as she listened to Snape.

"You people really have the wrong impression of the word choice."

"Granger-"

"I remember when Lucius gave me a choice," she laughed at the memory, but had tears in her eyes.

"What do you mean?" Snape asked carefully, observing her.

"One day I pushed him too far," Hermione remembered, "And he wanted to throw me out of the Manor, but I begged him to let me stay."

She felt so ashamed of herself for admitting that. She did not want Snape to know how weak and pathetic she was.

"I was afraid of the outside world. So I begged him to take me back. And he gave me a choice. Either I would leave the Manor or stay and share his bed."

It sounded so much horrible when she said it out loud. She couldn't even look at Snape, she was so ashamed.

"I don't think I need to tell you what I chose," she said quietly, looking down at her hands.

"No, there is no need," Snape's voice was actually softer than usually.

After a few moments he added:"You did what you had to to survive. There is nothing shameful about that."

Hermione did not agree with him, but decided not to argue. She was too tired for something like that.

"Don't let her chose death," she pleaded, "Protect her. Maybe there still is hope for this world."

Snape nodded, then cleared his throat. They were becoming too personal with each other.

"So," Hermione started, "We should go to sleep, make the best out of the few hours we've got left."

"I agree. You can take the room across the hall," he said, "I have to ask you to avoid Ginevra. We will leave in the morning."

"I understand. She cannot see me."

The rest of that early morning was a big blur to Hermione. She remembered Snape walking her to the room, then the bed and then nothing. She must have been really tired.

ooo

"This is a bracelet you will use to contact me," Snape explained to her.

It was eleven o'clock in the morning and they were already preparing for the big event. Hermione hadn't even had breakfast. Snape ordered the House Elf to bring to her, but she could not even look at it. She realized she would have to become more careful. If she kept rejecting food, getting sick and dizzy it would become obvious what was wrong with her. And she did not want that. Not yet.

Hermione took the bracelet and put it on. It was barely noticeable but it had a small dark stone on it.

"Whenever you wish for me, simply rub the stone. Once if you simply have information or would like to see me, and twice if it is urgent," he explained, "Understood?"

She nodded, hoping it would never come that far that she would have to rub the stone twice.

"Are you ready, Miss Granger?"

"Yes," even she herself did not believe her words.

Snape looked at her for a moment and it seemed as if he was about to say something, but then he simply took her hand.

"I will simply bring you there and then I will have to Apparate away. I cannot risk anyone seeing me with you."

"I know," she whispered, then took a deep breath, "Let's go."

Snape did not have to be told twice as they Apparated.

ooo

Hermione hated the feeling of dizziness. It felt as if the floor beneath her was moving and she leaned back for support. Opening her eyes, she realized they were in the Diagon Alley. She could hear the people. They were behind a house, hidden from others.

"This is where I leave, Miss Granger," Snape said and let go of her hand.

She did not know what to say to him. Would it help if she said to him that she had no idea what she was doing or that she was completely freaking out, frightened, terrified?

No. It would do no good.

So she simply nodded and Snape understood it.

"We will see each other soon," with those words he took a few steps away from her and Disapparated.

Hermione could feel her throat close up with fear. This was it. She was alone.

**A/N: I'm sorry there is no Lucius, but I promise he will be in the next chapter! And a lot! :) As you have probably already noticed Snape will have much bigger part in here than he did in the In the Dark. Hope that is alright with you.**

**There is another thing I would like to ask you. It has been brought to my attention that there is a story about Lucius and Hermione called 'Captured' and that the author is copying everything from In the Dark. I would like to ask you if you could read that other story and let me know if it really is copying or if I am simply exaggerating. Thank you!**


	5. The Reunion

Chapter 5 **THE REUNION **

_Great plan, Hermione. _

That was the first thought that crossed Hermione's mind as she realized she was left completely alone. Alone in the world ruled by criminals. She had agreed to let herself get captured and taken back to where she had escaped from. And she thought of herself as smart.

_This is it. _

She took a deep breath, then slowly walked out of her hiding spot, keeping her head down. Then she realized what she was wearing. Jeans and a shirt. Muggle clothes would surely draw attention to her.

_Calm down, Hermione. _

She had to remind herself that was what she wanted. She wanted to draw attention, she wanted to get noticed. Her goal was to get captured.

But with each passing second her determination was staring to disappear. And fear was taking it's place. It was hard to remember that she was the brightest witch of her age, a part of the Golden Trio. Those times seemed like many years ago. She knew what the Wizarding World was like. She had experienced every ugly and vile thing in it.

When she finally allowed herself to look up, she noticed how different eveything seemed. There were people walking around, but no one was paying attention to anyone. It seemed as if they were afraid to look at each other. They were not talking, but whispering. It was even more horrible than that day when Lucius brought her to Diagon Alley to show her what the world was like nowdays. And that was a few months ago.

As she took her time to look at the people, she noticed some of them were wearing collars. Just as Snape had told her. Those were the people who were looking down. And there were people who did not wear a collar. Hermione knew exactly what they were. Purebloods. It angered her. She never imagined it would come that far. How could they treat Muggleborns as animals? What has happened to the world? Have they all gone mad?

There was no life. Hermione felt like crying as she remembered how Diagon Alley used to look like. How it used to feel like. And now-

"You there!" someone shouted, causing Hermione to turn towards the direction of the voice.

There was a man standing on the other end of the street, wearing a black uniform and looking at her. Glaring at her. Suddenly panic shot through her. She noticed that everyone stopped and observed her. Some had fear in their eyes, some curiosity.

What was she supposed to do? Try to run away? Or stay and -?

She did not have the time to think about her choices as the man approached her. He was tall and dark. His whole appearance was frightening, but what scared her the most was his face. There was a big scar on his cheek and Hermione could not help but wonder how he got it. He looked at her coldly and pulled out his wand.

Hermione tensed, but tried to remain calm. He would not kill her. Snape told her that every suspect needed to be brought to a questioning. But what if he was wrong? What if-?

"Identify yourself," the man ordered, looking down at her.

_Should I tell him my name? _

After a moment she decided it would not be such a good idea. Obviously he did not know who she was and she had a feeling it wouldn't be smart if he found out she was the part of the Golden Trio. That would have to wait.

She could tell her silence angered him, but she still said nothing.

"Who is your Master?" he asked again.

Hermione stopped herself before she snorted at the question. But the look of rebellion on her face was obviously enough for him to forcefully grab her arm.

"You are going with me, little lady," he informed her with a sick grin, "You should know better than to walk around without your Master and without your collar as it is obvious you are not a Pureblood."

It was obvious? Was it written on her forehead or what?

"And what are you all looking at?" he shouted at the crowd surrounding them and people immediately looked away and continued doing what they were doing before.

Before Hermione had the time to react, something black was put over her head and she could not see a thing. It was then when she struggled, afraid and not controlling herself anymore.

Suddenly she recognized the feeling of Apparition and a second later she was in a different place. Again, her stomach threatened to rebel against her and the feeling of dizziness returned. She was positive she would not be able to handle another Apparition anytime soon. Without giving her time to recover, the man started walking, dragging her with him. It hit her how familiar it all felt to her. The darkness. Not being able to see anything. It was nothing new to her. She did not stumble awkwardly. Being blind for a few months taught her how to rely on other senses and to gain her balance back. She could tell she was in a house. There were people talking and whispering. Judging by the noise she heard there had to be a lot of people.

Suddenly the man that was dragging her, stopped.

"What have you brought?, Nelson?" another man asked.

"I found her in the Diagon Alley, without her Master or a collar," he explained, "She would not answer my questions."

"We have a lot of that going around. She is the eleventh person being brought here this week."

Hermione listened carefully as the two men talked. She had to be in the dungeon at the Malfoy Manor, just as Snape said.

"Where do I leave her?"

"Just put her in one of the cells, we do not have time to deal with her at the moment."

A moment after she was being dragged away again, then she heard doors opening. She fell down as the man pushed her in. Without loosing time, she removed the bag from her head and took in her surroundings.

The first thing she noticed was the cell she was in. It reminded her of prison cells with bars she saw in movies. Never had she imagined she would find herself in one. There were other people in the cell with her. Just girls. They were sitting lifelessly on the ground, some were staring at her, some were simply looking down. Hermione noticed that the dungeon was a large room with four cells. Two cells were filled with men and boys and the other two cells with girls. They were probably all brought to a questioning. She could see Death Eaters questioning a young boy in the other corner of the dungeon. He was probably twenty-something. Hermione could not stand to look at him, he was on the floor, beaten and probably starved. The Death Eaters were talking to him, but Hermione could not hear what they were saying. Some were serious and some were laughing.

_Bastards. _

The whole dungeon was filled with Death Eaters. Either they were torturing someone or they were talking to each other.

Hermione could not believe what she had gotten herself into. She could be at home, safe in her room. But no, she had to play a hero. Hesitantly she looked at the bracelet that Snape gave her. Would he get her out of here if she asked him to?

A second later she pushed that thought out of her mind. She would not become a coward. She made a decision and now she had to live with it. Slowly she turned towards the other girls, noticing how dirty and starved they looked.

"H-Hi," she started and a few of them looked up at her.

"How long have you been here? And…why are you here?" she asked quietly.

She got no answer from them, they were simply staring at her as if she was crazy. Their looks made her feel uncomfortable and she shifted her weight and crossed her arms over her chest.

"Can one of you tell me what can I expect?" she tried another question, but again no one answered.

Hermione opened her mouth to speak again, but was cut off by a horrible scream. She turned around and noticed a girl on the floor, writhing in pain as two Death Eaters stood beside her. One had his wand pointed at her, smirking. The girl looked as if she was being burnt alive, as if thousands of knives were stabbing through her body.

Hermione knew exactly what was being done to that poor girl. She had experienced it many times before. The Cruciatus Curse. She had to look away, not being able to stand the sight of such a young girl being tortured. She knew all about the torture, but it was a completely another thing to see it happen. Especially to another person. Without a word Hermione walked to the nearest wall and sat down, bringing her knees to her chin. And she waited. What else could she do?

The Death Eaters were smart. They organized the room so that the prisoners that waited could see and hear what was about to happen to them. They were forced to witness the torture and many of them broke down simply by watching what was probably going to happen to them.

Hermione wanted to fall asleep, to ignore what was happening around her, but it was impossible. The screams, the laughter, the noise. At least five hours passed since she had been caught and still no one would talk to her.

Hermione only hoped she would not get tortured. She had no idea how the Cruciatus Curse would affect her in her current condition, but she knew that it could cause serious cramping. Could it cause…abortion? She never read anything about it in the books, but she was still worried. She had to see Lucius. He was the only one that could help her. She almost laughed out loud as she realized what she said in her mind. When did he ever help her?

"Hi," suddenly someone said to her.

Hermione looked up at the girl who was standing above her.

"Hi?" she said back, but it sounded like a question. She was surprised that the girl was talking to her.

The girl gave her a polite smile, then sat down next to Hermione.

"So, how did you get captured?" she asked Hermione, her voice casual as if talking about getting captured was the most normal thing ever.

"I- umm, I was-" Hermione did not know what to say exactly, "I was caught in the Diagon Alley without my collar."

"Well, that was stupid of you," the girl commented.

Hermione opened her mouth to protest, but stopped herself.

"What's your name?" she asked, changing the subject.

"It does not matter," the girl shrugged, "I was caught wearing a fake collar."

Hermione took a look at her. The girl seemed to be the same age as her, the same height. Her hair was long and blond. She somehow seemed familiar to her.

"I'm Her-" Hermione started, but the girl cut her off.

"You're Hermione Granger," she said, "I know you."

"You do?"

The girl simply nodded. Hermione realized she reminded her of Luna. They both had long, blond hair and the way they spoke was similar. Perhaps being captured for a long time did that to a person.

"Did you go to Hogwarts?" Hermione asked.

The girl nodded again, "I was in Hufflepuff."

"You seem familiar. I've probably seen you around," Hermione explained and the girl smiled weakly.

They were both silent for a few moments until Hermione spoke again.

"What are they going to do to me? How does the questioning look like?"

The girl did not answer immediately. She seemed to be lost in her thoughts and when Hermione was about to ask again, she finally spoke.

"They will want to know your name, your intentions, everything about you. Once they are convinced they have no use for you anymore they pass you on."

"On?"

"You either get killed or some Death Eater takes you to be his house elf, his toy, his whore. It matters not."

Hermione shuddered at hearing that. What shocked her the most was the way the way the girl spoke. There was no fear in her voice, no emotion, nothing. She was probably used to it all by now.

"They use some kind of a spell on you that tells them almost everything about you," the girl continued.

"What do you mean by that?"

"The spell tells them your blood status, if you have ever killed anyone, if you are still untouched and so on."

Hermione took a deep breath, nodding. She hated them, she despised how they thought they have the right to know everything about a person. But she could not do a damn thing to stop them.

"Do you know-" she tried to ask, but did not know how, "Have you seen…Does he...Do you know about L-Lucius Malfoy?"

"Of course," the girl nodded, "He's the one in charge. He's not here that much, but he appears every once and awhile."

"And umm…when was the last time he was here?"

"It think it was two days ago, or maybe it was yesterday. It hard to keep track with time in here," the girl spoke, looking at something in the distance.

Hermione nodded, then looked around, checking if anybody was listening to their conversation. When she saw that no one was, she asked quietly:"Are you connected with the Resistance?"

The girl's eyes snapped towards her, but she said nothing. Hermione could see her question made her upset, her breathing accelerated and her eyes were wide open in fear.

"We shouldn't be talking about it," with that sentence the girl stood up and moved away from Hermione.

She was right, Hermione reminded herself. They shouldn't be talking about it, it was too dangerous. But the girl's reaction told her a lot. It was obvious she knew more than it appeared.

She would have to try to talk to her again, but not now. She was too nervous to speak to anyone. She knew she would have to get questioned and with each passing minute she was closer to it.

ooo

And she did not have to wait long. It was maybe two hours later when a Death Eater approached the cell Hermione was in. Opening the doors, he looked directly at her and motioned her to come with him.

"You are next," he said to her, his voice was disgustingly hoarse.

Hermione stood up, her whole body shaking with anticipation and fear. She followed the man out and he led her to a place in the middle of the dungeon. Hermione looked at the floor and noticed there was blood on it. Immediately she felt sick and even more terrified than before.

Suddenly two other Death Eaters approached. One had a piece of parchment with him and was writing on it, without even looking at her.

"Your name?" he questioned.

"Hermione Granger," she answered, her voice shaking. How she hated when it happened.

Her answer made all the men look at her and Hermione tried her best not to coward in front of them.

"Hermione Granger," one of them said, then a grin appeared on his face, "A friend of the famous Harry Potter."

"Well, well, well," the other one smirked, "This certainly is our best catch of the day."

"Imagine what it would do to our reputation," they spoke between themselves and Hermione listened, trying not to get even more frightened.

"Maybe we should report this to our Master," one suggested.

Hermione only hoped that the Master was Lucius. It had to be him. He was the one who took over Voldemort's place.

"No need to bother him with this," the man in the middle said, not taking his eyes off Hermione, "We can call him once we get all the information out of her."

"But maybe we should-"

"No, Liam. You know he doesn't like to be bothered."

Hermione could feel panic rising inside of her. It was not going as planned. She was supposed to be reunited with Lucius again, not questioned by three strangers. She had to do something.

"What were you doing in the Diagon Alley, girl?" the man in the middle asked.

"I-I was waiting," Hermione lied, hoping they would not realize it.

"Waiting for what or who?"

Hermione did not want to lose her time talking to them. She needed to see Lucius. "I will not answer your questions anymore," she said with a strong voice, even though her whole body trembled.

"Is that so?"

"I will speak only to Lucius Malfoy," she added, looking the man straight into his eyes. She felt so ridiculous, pretending to be strong and demanding something even though she was not in the position to do so.

"And why would he want to lose his time with you?" he asked, interest showing in his eyes, "Enlighten me."

"I heard that she was his reward, but she went missing a few months ago," the other man said quietly, but Hermione heard it.

Ever since she returned to the Muggle World she has wondered how Lucius managed to explain her disappearance without raising suspicion. And now she got her answer. He simply told everyone she went missing. Not a good cover story, but obviously no one dared to question it.

Hermione could feel the atmosphere changing. She noticed as the leader said something to the man on his left, but she could not hear it. The man nodded and left.

The leader turned his attention to Hermione again.

"Now, where were we?" he asked with a sick grin.

ooo

In the last hour there were at least a hundred times when Hermione wanted to use the bracelet and call Snape. But each time she stopped herself. She was not a coward. She chose to go back into the Wizarding World and there was no turning back.

"Stop lying to us!" the leader hissed at her, his face contorted in anger.

Hermione shuddered, waiting for the pain to pass. They had used number of torturing spells on her, from the burning spell to suffocation spell. But at least they had not used the Cruciatus Curse.

"You were contacted by the Resistance, weren't you?" the man asked, "Why else would you be walking around without your collar? And in Muggle clothing, no less," he snorted in disgust.

"I will t-talk to Lucius Malfoy," Hermione managed to let out, "And to him only."

She was on the floor, fighting to catch her breath as the leader approached her, glaring threatengly down at her.

"We do not take orders from a filthy Mudblood," he cursed, striking her across the face.

Hermione's head turned with the force of it, but she did not let out any sound. It hurt, but she had been hit harder in the past.

She looked at the man again, her whole body shaking. He took a deep breath through his nose, trying to calm down.

"Alright," he started, "It appears death does not scare you. We need information, and you are the source of the information. But it seems you are not easy to crack. Since we have you though, we will have our fun if you don't. You may be a filthy little mudblood bitch, but you do have your better qualities."

_Snape. Snape. Snape. Get me out of here. Please! _

Hermione could hear her heart beating faster with each second. It seemed as if it was located in her head, not her chest.

The leader was looking down at her, killing her with his gaze, daring her to disobey him again. Hermione felt like dying, but she could not look away from him.

Finally after a few long moments he raised his eyebrows and pointed his wand at her. After muttering a silent spell, Hermione felt a strange stinging feeling on her left wrist. Looking down at her, she gasped in shock as realized what it was. The same spell was used by Lucius the second day of her capture, a few months ago. She could still remember what it was all about. She had refused to call herself a Mudblood and he forced her, slashing her wrists. She could still remember the blood, smell it, feel it. Just the memory made her sick. And now it was happening again. There was a small cut on the inside of her wrist and it was beginning to get larger and deeper.

"Simply answer our questions," the leader said to her.

Hermione bit her lower lip hard, preventing cries of pain to escape from her. She could feel warm blood slowly leaking through the cut and it made her sick to her stomach. Covering her bleeding wrist with her other hand, she only hoped it would somehow stop the bleeding. She hated it. She hated the blood, the feel of it, the smell of it, the taste of it.

"Oh god," she whispered, feeling the sickness rise in her stomach.

_No, no, no. _

"Give us the names and-" the leader started talking, but was cut off as Hermione turned around and threw up, everything she had eaten in the last few days making it's way up. After she was done, she crawled away trying to get a hold of herself. She felt weak and tired. And sick. Mostly sick. And she knew where that sickness came from.

_Damn him._It was all his fault. He was the one to blame for all of this. He should have taken precautions to prevent such thing from happening.

As she felt another wave of sickness rise, she quickly covered her mouth with her right hand. But it was all covered in blood and that made her even more disgusted.

"Filth," she heard the man who questioned her insult her.

And then something happened. Someone's voice. She could hear it clearly through the noise and the talking. He was walking towards them. She could recognize that voice anytime, anywhere.

"What is so important that you have come to bother me this late at night?" he finally asked as he reached them.

It was his voice. That elegant and silky voice, yet at the same time cold and dead. He was standing above her, talking to the man who questioned her. Hermione kept her head down, afraid to look up at him. Maybe it was not him. Perhaps it was all simply her imagination. She hadn't seen him for almost two months. Many things changed in that time. Was she ready to face him again?

"Master, we thought it would be wise to inform you of this."

"Of what?" he asked, obviously irritated, "You found yourself incapable of getting the information out of-"

Hermione's head snapped up and for the moment it seemed as if the time had stopped. Their eyes met and Hermione could not describe the emotions that exploded inside of her at the sight of him.

It was truly him. Lucius Malfoy. He seemed elegant as always, wearing black robes, his hair in a ponytail. He was gripping his cane with snake's head on it. He seemed the same as she remembered him. And those grey eyes. The way he was looking at her. Hermione could see that seeing her again was a big shock for him as well. His face went pale and he was silent for a few long moments.

"Master?"

That seemed to bring both of them back into reality, but Hermione still could not tear her eyes away from his. And he seemed to be having the same problem. Finally he swallowed hard and spoke:"Where have you found her?"

"Diagon Alley. She was caught wearing Muggle clothing and with no collar on."

"Has she said anything?" Lucius asked, still not taking his eyes away from her.

It bothered her how he stared at her, but at the same time pretended as if she was not there. He was asking his fellow Death Eater questions about her as if she was not able to answer herself. His voice was calm and even, not betraying him. Hermione wished she could be more like that.

"She refused to speak to us, insisting she would only talk to you, Master."

Something flickered in his eyes at that, but it quickly disappeared. Slowly his eyes traveled down her body, stopping at the wounded wrist which was still bleeding.

"Heal her," he ordered and the man next to him obeyed without questions. He flickered his wand at Hermione and the cut healed itself in a second.

"Bring her to the special room," Lucius said, still looking at her.

"But, sir, that room is meant for individual interrogation, for more important people, leaders and such. I seriously doubt she is-"

Finally Lucius broke their eye contact as he turned to face the man beside him:"Are you questioning my orders?" he growled.

"Of course not, Master," he quickly said, then added,"She will be brought to that room as soon as I make a report about her."

Hermione noticed how Lucius rolled his eyes, but said nothing. The report was probably some kind of a necessary procedure. The man next to him conjured a piece of parchment. It floated in the air in front of him.

"Name?" he asked her.

"Hermione Granger."

"Age?"

"E-Eighteen," she answered, looking at Lucius. He was not staring at her anymore. She could see he was still upset as he was clenching his jaw and gripping his cane tighter than normally. Those were the little things she had come to notice after living with him for months.

"Your blood status?"

Why were they asking her that? They already knew. Irritated, she forced herself to answer:"Muggleborn."

She noticed that her answers seemed to write themselves down on that piece of parchment. She wondered if they would know if she decided to lie. Would it start writing in a different color or something like that?

"Have you ever taken a life?"

A horrible memories of the Final Battle flooded her mind. She had fought like everyone else, she had sent curses at the enemies, but had she killed anyone? She did not know. In the midst of the flying curses and screams she did not have the time to think about it.

But there was one person she killed. A Death Eater. When she and Lucius were locked up in a dungeon. She could still clearly remember how she said the words and his body falling to the ground. But if she hadn't done it, Lucius would be dead. She had to do it. To save him, to save them both.

"Have you ever taken a life?" the man repeated the question, louder than before.

Hermione looked at Lucius and he was staring back at her, the look in his eyes was the proof that he knew exactly what she was thinking. And then there was the slightest, barely noticeable nod from him. Only she could see it. It was strange how close she felt to him, even though being away from him for almost two months. It felt as if it was only yesterday when she was in his arms, closer to him as she had never been to anyone before. Breaking their locked gazes was almost physically painful, but Hermione forced herself to look at the man who was questioning her.

"Y-Yes, I have," she finally answered and the whole weight of her actions finally hit her. She had never said it out loud. But there was no time to think about her actions as the next question was asked.

"Your maidenhead status?"

Her cheeks immediately blushed and she looked up at Lucius. What kind of a question was that? Why was it important? It enraged her how these people thought they had the right to know person's private details.

"Well? Answer the question."

Hermione could feel her head burning with humiliation, shame, anger. Lucius barely threw a glance at her. Why doesn't _he_ answer the question? _He_ would know. _That bastard._And he could not even look at her. Was he afraid she would spill out his secret? That he lowered himself enough to bed a Mudblood?

Hermione took a deep breath, trying to calm herself down. Her emotions were changing every minute and she was afraid she would do or say something she would later regret. She blamed the hormones for everything. She blamed Lucius for everything.

Then something occurred to her. She looked at the man who was questioning her and answered,"I'm a virgin."

That made Lucius look at her, simply look at her, his face betraying no emotions whatsoever.

"Wrong answer, little one," the Death Eater smirked.

So the parchment could recognize the lies. Interesting.

"Take her there. I will follow shortly," Lucius ordered, then turned and left.

_Was that all? No more questions?_Her heart, pounding already, lurched a bit higher.

The Death Eater grabbed her arm and pulled her up, dragging her out of the dungeon and through a long dark corridor. The dungeon he was taking her to was not far away. Once she was pushed inside, the man entered as well, closing the doors behind her. Hermione hugged herself with her arms and looked around. It was a dark room with no windows. There was nothing. No room, no toilet, absolutely nothing. She could only hope they did not plan on keeping her there for a long time. Hermione was slowly starting to get uncomfortable with that Death Eater staring at her and was glad when Lucius finally came back.

"Change," he ordered and threw something at her. Hermione barely caught it and then recognized it as a robe. An ugly grey robe.

"Why can't I wear my clothes?" she asked.

"Muggle clothing is not welcome in this World," the other Death Eater answered while Lucius simply glared at her.

How foolish of her to think they would allow her to wear her own clothes. Taking one's clothes was like taking their identity away.

Alright. She would change. It was not something worth arguing about. But how to change when they are both staring at her like that? If there was only Lucius, then maybe it would not bother her that much. Not after everything they have been through. But the other Death Eater? She did not even know him and he was not moving his eyes away from her. Gritting her teeth together she undid the buttons on her shirt, trying to hide how much it bothered her having to change in front of them.

"Morrison, leave," Lucius suddenly said, his tone cold and authoritative.

"Master?"

"I wish to speak to her in private," Lucius added, "She was my reward, I still have the right."

The other man simply nodded, though disappointment was seen on his face. Without a word he left the dungeon, leaving Hermione and Lucius alone.

She was finally alone with him. There he was. Standing impassively, staring at her, his face cold and hard. Hermione opened her mouth to speak, but then simply closed it, not knowing how to start.

"What the hell are you doing?" he finally asked, no, barked at her.

"What do you mean?"

"Explain," he ordered.

Such a simple word. He had said that to her many times in the past.

Hermione sighed:"What do you want me to explain?"

"Do not play dumb with me, girl," he replied, a dangerous tone in his voice. Hermione felt as if she could not lie to him when he looked at her like that.

He took a step closer to her, his eyes not moving from hers,"I left you in that filthy Muggle World," after a moment he continued, "I expected you to stay there like a good little girl."

"I guess," she swallowed hard, "I am not a good little girl anymore."

Lucius' jaw clenched and Hermione knew she had hit a nerve. She could feel bravery building inside of her, but she was still shaking from head to toe. Did he have that kind of an impact on her? Was seeing him again such a shock to her?

He approached her again and Hermione found herself caught between the wall and his body. She would not show she was uncomfortable, but he could probably read it on her face.

"You know about the Resistance," he stated matter-of-factly, he did not even give her the opportunity to deny it.

He continued,"You will be interrogated. You will give us everything you know."

"I know nothing," she whispered, "Nothing that would help you."

"We will see about that," then he was silent for a long moment, his face hard, "I will not be able to help you. If you cooperate, nothing will happen to you. But if you do not-"

His words actually frigtened her. The intense look he was giving her was like a warning.

She quickly nodded:"Yes, I was contacted by them, but they told me nothing! You have to believe me."

He was silent, simply observing her. Hermione could not tell if he believed her or not.

"You have complicated everything by coming back, Mudblood," he said quietly.

Maybe she was wrong. Maybe it was a crazy idea to come back. Perhaps the smartest thing would be to stay in her room, away from all the madness and violence. Especially now when she was….god, she still could not bring herself to say the word. But he had to know. That was one reason why she came back. She needed his help. Any kind of help. Even if he decided to kill her and end it all.

"Lucius," she started, realizing how strange was using his name again.

He raised his eyebrow in interest, that was his only response.

"I need to-" she didn't know how to say it, "I am…There is a…"

She could not say it. Not yet. Closing her mouth, she noticed the look of suspicion on Lucius' face. He knew there was something she was not telling him. He took another step closer to her and Hermione could feel his presence, smell him and it caused something in her mind to come surfacing back. It was like a flashback.

_She was in her room. It was dark. _

_"Who's there?" _

_No answer. Just darkness. And then she was being pushed against the wall. There was someone holding her. A man. His smell was familiar. _

_"Quiet," he ordered. _

_It was his voice. She could feel his breath on her neck. And then…nothing. _

Hermione snapped back into reality. It was like trying to remember a dream. Everything was unclear and broken into little pieces.

"Mudblood?"

Hermione looked up at him. Was that a memory? Had it really happened or was her mind playing games with her?

"Why did you let yourself get captured?" he asked, looking at her as if she were a dumb child.

"I did not _let_myself-"

"I would have expected more from you," he said more sharply.

"You don't know anything about me," Hermione shot at him, but then realized she had to calm down. If he only suspected that there was something else behind her return it would all be over.

His face darkened. For a moment of alarm, she wondered if he would strike her.

He simply glared at her and then...and then he kissed her. Without a warning. His hands on her shoulders, stilling her shaking. She found herself clutching the front of his robes. The kiss began with hesitance, but proceeded rapidly, although with some subtlety along the way, to demanding. It was all she could do not to press closer to him, while the urging to do that spread through her body.

Had he put a spell on her? Why was she melting in his arms? Why was she allowing him to kiss her after all this time? He obviously thought she was his toy, a toy that he could play with whenever he wished. His hands found the front of her shirt and in a few moments the buttons were undone and the shirt was pushed off her shoulders. But then he released her lips and now he was staring down her with the same probing gaze that he used many times in the past. Silence, broken only by their own unsteady breathing.

"Change," was all he said to her afterwards and with that he turned and left, leaving Hermione completely shocked. She felt as if all air had been pushed out of her lungs. Her skin was on fire, her heart was beating uncontrollably. She took a few shaky breaths, calming herself.

_What just happened? _

He kissed her. And she kissed him back. How could she be such a fool? How could she allow something like that? She was not his toy. Not anymore. But then how was it possible he had such an influence on her? Why did she not push him away?

Hermione ran a hand through her hair, thinking hard about her next step. Whatever they had, it was not just on her part. He could feel it too. And whatever it was, Hermione had to use it. She needed to get back into his house, she needed to regain her position as his…reward. That was the only way she could observe his every move.

But how to do that? It was not just her and Lucius anymore. They were caught in the middle of a political affair. There were other Death Eaters, she was nothing more than a captured suspect. He could not help her. He had said so himself. She had to help herself. That was how the life of a spy looked like. Hermione suddenly admired Snape more than ever.

_I know nothing. _

_The Resistance contacted me at my house, took me to the Diagon Alley where I was supposed to meet with their leader, but I was caught. _

_I don't know their names. _

_I don't know where their Headquarters are. _

Hermione kept repeating those sentences in her head. She had to sound convincing. Her life depended on it. But all she could do now was wait.

And what about Lucius? When would be the right time to tell him about the little problem he was responsible for? What would his reaction be like? Hermione was terrified to simply think about it. He already had a son, a son worthy of the name Malfoy. Hermione could imagine how disgusted and angry he would be once he found out. Everything was complicated.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Another chapter! I am slowly getting into the story and it will get better, I promise. But I need to warn you that it will be darker than In the dark, there will be violence, character death, etc. Hope you will continue to read it. :) You won't be sorry. **

**And I would just like to say that I have seen HP and the Deathly Hallows part 2 and it was the best HP movie I have ever seen. I loved the Malfoy familiy and Snape's story in it. Was I the only one who cried during his death scene and his memories? Beautifully done. **

**Anyway, I hope you liked the chapter, tell me what you think and what would you like to see happen in the future. I am interested to hear your ideas.:)**


	6. Sacrifices

Chapter 6 **SACRIFICES **

The doors to the dungeon opened with a noise and Hermione pulled herself up from the floor, ready to face who ever came through the door. She tried to calm down her heart, which was now beating uncontrollably. It was not simply her life at the stake anymore. Many things depended on her and her ability to lie to her captors. Snape's life depended on it, the future of the Resistance depended on it, as well as the future of all the Muggleborns and Muggles.

Three men entered the dungeon. Hermione took a few moments to look at each of them. The first one was familiar to her, he was forty-something. Then she noticed the scar on his face and remembered immediately where she had seen him before. He was the one who questioned her when she was captured. When was that? Yesterday? A few hours had passed since Lucius left her alone in the dungeon and no one came to bother her after that.

The second man was the same age as the first one. He had dark hair and was dressed completely black. His eyes were so cold it actually sent shivers down Hermione's body.

And the third man was actually very young. He couldn't have been more than twenty. Hermione looked at him, noticing his dark hair and his handsome face. Did he go to Hogwarts? She couldn't remember seeing him there. But it did not matter anyway. Why would she care what school he attended? He was now a Death Eaters and nothing else mattered.

"Sit," the first man said to her, waving his wand and conjuring a wooden chair in the middle of the dungeon.

Hermione obeyed, slowly walking to the chair, not taking her eyes off the three men in front of her. As she sat down, she noticed the second man waved his wand at something behind her. She turned around and noticed how her Muggle jeans and a shirt disappeared from the floor. She felt a strange feeling of loss as they got rid of her clothes, but what else did she expect? Looking down at her new clothing, she grimaced at the simple grey robe she was wearing. She was a prisoner now.

She wondered where Lucius was and why he was not present. She needed to talk to him, she needed to convince him to take her back to his house. How could she be a spy if she was locked up in a dungeon? Then she remembered that she was in the Malfoy Manor, technically. But it was not the same as before. She needed to regain her position as his reward.

"Hermione Granger, age eighteen, Non-Pureblood, Hogwarts student," the first man started reading off the parchment he was holding.

"A part of the famous Golden Trio, Harry Potter's close friend," he continued, "Lucius Malfoy's reward after the War, disappeared more than a month ago without explanation. Suspected to be connected with the Resistance."

Hermione could feel her throat close up with fear and anticipation as she waited. Why were they here? What could they possibly want from her?

The man finally looked at her and she held his gaze. "Tell us again what you were doing in the Diagon alley?"

Hermione swallowed hard, forcing her voice to be steady and calm as she spoke:"I was waiting for someone from the Resistance. They were supposed to contact me there."

She could not believe how easily she lied. Even she herself would believe her words. She only hoped her face was as calm as her voice was.

"When was the first time you were contacted by them?"

"A f-few days ago, in my bedroom."

The man seemed to believe everything she was telling him and somehow it worried her. It should not be that easy. Something was wrong.

"And how did you escape from this world? Explain your disapearence."

Hermione tensed at that question. She did not know what to say. What should she say? How did Lucius explain her departure? They should tell everyone the same story, so that people would not get even more suspicious.

"I was-" she started, but then simply stopped, the voice dying in her throat.

She could hear her heart beating in her throat, she could feel the accusing and suspicious stares the three men were now sending her.

As Hermione opened her mouth to say something, anything, the doors to the dungeon opened and she let out a visible sigh of relief as Lucius entered. He nodded to the three Death Eaters as he greeted them, then set his eyes on Hermione.

"Has she said anything useful yet?" he asked, his voice sounding bored.

I am right here. You can ask me yourself.

"She has said a few things, but we are not sure if the information could help us."

"We were just interrogating her about her departure from this world."

Hermione narrowed her eyes as she noticed Lucius tense slightly. Or maybe she imagined it because a moment later he seemed relaxed again. Did she imagine those short changes in his mood? While living with him she noticed that she had come to pick up on those small and barely noticeable signs that told her what he was thinking, what he was feeling. It started when she could not see and all she had was his voice. As weeks passed she started to notice the change in his tone, the color of it. She could tell when he was angry or upset or when he was smirking at her. Those small signs that she was positive other people did not catch. And then she became even better at reading his thoughts and emotions when her sight returned to her. Those slight changes on his face, his eyes, the movements of his lips. She became an expert at reading Lucius Malfoy. And yet sometimes it seemed as if he was a mystery she would never solve.

"I already told you my suspicions," Lucius replied, "It is useless asking her about it as it is obvious she will not tell us the truth."

"Perhaps we could convince her that lying to us would prove to be a very bad decision," the Death Eater said to Lucius.

He simply smirked at that suggestion, confidence in his voice as he spoke:"I have had her for a couple of months and in that time I realized she does not respond to torture as one would expect. Even though it is humiliating for me to admit it, she is hard to break. She will not give you information under torture."

Hermione could not prevent the look of surprise on her face as she listened to him. What the hell was he talking about? What he was saying were total lies. She had always broken under his torture, it took a while, but he always succeeded in making her succumb to his will. Why was he lying about it now? Was he trying to…_protect_her?

"Interesting," the Death Eater said, then looked at Hermione, "You would not mind if we test that theory?"

Hermione looked at the man who was threatening her, defiance in her eyes. She knew it would come to that. Torture was something that spies could not escape from.

"I am not going to stand in your way, but you would be losing your time," Lucius said calmly.

"It is the standard procedure, Lucius," the man insisted and Hermione could already see what was about to happen and she could not do a thing to stop it. Neither could Lucius. It would seem odd if he would try to interfere with the standard procedure. The standard procedure that included torture. Bastards.

"Is that really necessary, uncle?" the younger men spoke for the first time since entering the dungeon.

Hermione could not help but look at him and try to figure him out. Why was he not excited about the idea of torturing her?

The older men seemed to ignore him and then Lucius spoke again,"You would be wasting your time. If you truly want the truth from her, there is another way. But it would take some time."

"What do you mean?" he asked, curiosity evident on his face.

Lucius' lips curled up in a smirk as he explained:"I am the one who knows this Mudblood better than anyone. Believe me when I say I know what it is required to make her submissive."

At that moment Hermione could not read him. She was not positive what side he was on. Was he even on one side or was he in the middle?

"I cannot tell you anything in front of her," Lucius explained, throwing a glance at Hermione, "Let me explain in private."

"That is a good idea, uncle," the younger boy spoke again, "This torture is getting a bit boring by now."

It took a few moment for the Death Eater to decide, but then he finally nodded, looking at Hermione, who sat completely still, observing what was happening in front of her. She could not do anything to prevent it and the smartest thing she could do was to keep quiet.

The men all turned to leave the dungeon, only Lucius did not move from the spot where he was standing.

"I will follow you shortly, just give me a minute with the girl," he said to them, not taking his eyes from her.

Hermione observed as all three men left the dungeon and she was left with Lucius again. She stood up and went to stand next to the wall, feeling safer that way. Her eyes locked with Lucius' and she could feel herself melting underneath his gaze. But this time she would be stronger. She would not fall into his arms. She would not allow him to touch her.

Lucius approached her silently, his eyes roaming up and down her body, making her feel uncomfortable. Hermione barely resisted the urge to cross her arms over her chest as she stood proudly.

Lucius raised his eyebrow at her and stepped even closer to her, trapping her between the wall and his body. He was that close to her again, just like the last time when they- no, when he kissed her. It was definitely more his fault than it was hers.

She would stay strong.

_Be strong, Hermione. Keep a strong face. Don't let him- _

She could smell him again and it brought back so many memories. She was not sure when she had started to associate him with security, but that was what she felt when she was in trouble. She felt as if he could save her, as if he could protect her from everything. She felt like a little girl caught in the middle of a storm who wanted to find comfort in the arms of a monster.

_Concentrate, Hermione. You are strong. You are independent. You are- _

Her thoughts were interrupted as she felt his finger slowly slide up her arm and then it stopped on her shoulder. It always surprised her how his touch seemed to be so warm. It did not suite him. He should be cold as ice.

"Hmm," he murmured, looking at her shoulder.

Hermione narrowed her eyes in confusion and looked down as well. The robe seemed to slide off her left shoulder, leaving the bra strap visible. Lucius slowly hooked it under with his finger, playing with it.

"I thought I told you to get rid off all your Muggle clothing?" he asked quietly, still playing with the strap, then looking into her eyes, smirking.

Hermione clenched her jaw, anger surfacing. She used all her strength, brought her hands to his chest and pushed him away from her.

"What? Do women not wear bras in this world?" she asked, raising her eyebrows at him, her heart beating fast, but she seemed to control her voice.

Lucius did not seem to be angry at her for pushing him away. If anything, he seemed amused. After a moment of silence he let that issue pass.

"I do not believe I need to tell you that coming back here was a terrible decision," he spoke, the smirk finally leaving his face, "It may even cost you your life."

Hermione swallowed hard before she opened her mouth to speak, but he silenced her with his hand.

"I do not want to hear about your reasons, it does not matter anymore," he said to her, "There are more serious things you need to worry about."

"I swear I don't know anything about the Resistance," Hermione hoped he would believe her.

Lucius simply looked at her, his gaze telling her nothing about his thoughts. Did he believe her? And what did it matter if he believed her? She would have to convince the others.

He took a deep breath and narrowed his eyes, still not looking away from Hermione. Then his eyes slowly made their way down her body, taking in every detail.

"You have changed," he simply said after a few very long moments.

"W-What do you mean by that?"

Even she herself could hear the panic in her voice, it was impossible he missed it. How did she change? Hermione could not see any drastic change in her appearance. Was her stomach already-? No, it couldn't be. It was still too early.

"I cannot explain it, but there is defiantly something different," he said quietly, lost in his thoughts.

Hermione needed to change the subject. She could already feel her cheeks blush and her throat close up with panic.

"What are they going to do to me?" she suddenly asked, changing the subject.

"Interrogate you," he stated simply, "If you insist by your story, they will believe you after a few days," then he added, "After a few days of physical and mental torture."

"And you can't stop them?" the question escaped her lips before she could stop it.

He raised his brow in surprise, obviously not expecting that question from her.

"You very rarely asked for my help, Mudblood," he said to her almost seductively, "Are you asking for it now?"

Of course she was asking for his help. She would do anything just to be out of this dungeon. She could not do anything while locked up.

She slowly nodded:"Yes, I am."

Again there was a smirk on his face as he approached her:"And how would you thank me? What do you have to offer in return?"

That question brought back one memory. She could still remember it as if it happened yesterday. Their conversation in the garden, when he threatened to take her to the Diagon Alley and leaving her there. She begged him to let her stay at the Manor and he asked what would she offer in return. He always was a manipulative bastard.

"A-Anything," she forced out.

He was looking at her as if he was trying to figure her out, but after a few seconds he gave up and nodded.

"I will see what I can do," he nodded.

Hermione was completely silent. What could she say? Thank him? Their gazes were locked for a few long moments and then he finally turned and left.

When he was out of sight, Hermione allowed herself to breath again and relax. She did good. Her worst fear was that she would turn into a frightened little girl under his stare, but she did not. It took a lot of her power, but she lied to him. And he even seemed to believe her. But she could never be sure about what was happening inside Lucius' head.

OOO

Two days passed. Half an hour after Lucius' departure that day she was transported back into the cell with other prisoners. She tried to make contact with them, unsuccessfully. No one seemed to be interested in talking to her. Hermione noticed that they did not interact with each other at all. Everyone was keeping to themselves and Hermione knew there was a reason for that.

They were given food once a day, but the guards seemed to ignore Hermione as she never got her meal. That did not bother her because she was not that hungry, but she would not refuse water. What was their plan? Starve her to death?

On the second day one girl approached her. It was the girl she meet the first day, the one who reminded her of Luna. Hermione realized she never found out what happened to Luna. After Voldemort's victory Hermione never heard anything about her.

"Here," the girl said and offered her some bread and a bowl of water.

Hermione looked up at her in surprise:"Oh, thank you, but…I-I can't take it from you. You're hungry."

"You are probably _hungrier_," she smiled and sat down next to Hermione, placing the food on the ground next to her, "Take it."

"Are you sure?"

"I'm not that hungry and you are probably starving," the girl answered, looking somewhere in the distance.

Hermione noticed she often did that. Her eyes were lost and it seemed as if she was deep in her thoughts most of the time. Perhaps being in a cell for a long time did that to a person. She hesitantly accepted the bowl of water that was offered to her, smiling in gratitude.

"What is your name?" she asked before taking a sip, enjoying the taste of water in her mouth after two days.

"Melinda," the girl answered, still not looking at her.

"And how old are you?"

The girl finally looked at her, a confused smile on her face as she struggled with words:"I-I don't know. My birthday is in August. What month is it?"

"It's September. The…sixth, I think."

The girl nodded in understanding:"Oh, well, that would mean I'm eighteen."

"And when were you captured?"

"It seems like I've been here forever," Melinda smiled weakly, looking down at her hands, "But it think it's been…one month. Yes, I was captured at the end of July," then she laughed out loud, "Just one month? I can't believe it."

Hermione could clearly see the damage that one month left on the poor girl. She seemed alright and she was handling herself pretty well after being captured for over a month, but the consequences could be seen. It was obvious she was a bit distressed, confused, numb. Probably a shell of the girl she was at Hogwarts.

A question formed inside Hermione's mind. What was she like after living with Lucius? What would people say if they saw her? People who knew her when she was normal. When she was a happy, bright, positive person. How did she change after having lost her loved ones? After being tortured and humiliated day after day? After being called a Mudblood and forced to betray her beliefs and the people she loved? Perhaps she looked the same as Melinda did.

"Aren't you going to eat that?" the girl asked, pulling Hermione out of her thoughts.

"What? Oh, that-" she looked down and simply shook her head, "I'm not that hungry. You should eat it."

Melinda waited for a couple of moments before taking a bite of the small slice of bread.

"Why haven't they given me anything to eat?" Hermione asked quietly.

"It's the procedure. The new ones aren't allowed to eat anything for the first couple of days. We all went through it. The purpose is to make you obedient."

"So they starve us?" Hermione asked with anger in her voice,"They are anim-"

A horrible scream interrupted her, leaving her sentence unfinished. She did not want to know where the scream came from. It would not be a surprise. Another torture session was happening.

Hermione let out a shaky breath:"Animals."

The next few minutes passed in silence. Hermione did not know what to talk about with Melinda. The girl obviously did not want to talk about the Resistance, even though she did know something. Why else would she get nervous when Hermione mentioned it?

Then something occurred to her. Perhaps she could ask her about her friends. Luna, Neville and the rest of them.

As she turned to look at Melinda, she noticed an ugly looking wound on her neck. It looked like something or someone bit her.

"M-Melinda?" she asked, her eyes not moving from the girl's neck, "What is…that on your neck?"

"This?" the girl touched the wound, then shrugged her shoulders, "I was bitten." She said it as if it was the most normal thing in the world.

"Yes, I can see that," Hermione replied, "But who did it? And why?"

"It was a vampire, I don't know his name."

Hermione could not hide the fact that her answer shocked her. Of course she knew vampires existed, she had read many books on them, but it was strange seeing the real evidence of their existence.

"Magical hominid, that is known for biting people on the neck and sucking their blood," Hermione whispered more to herself than to Melinda, but the girl heard her and smiled.

"What do you know about vampires?" she asked.

Hermione shook her head, answering:"Little is known about them, however they have been widely integrated into Muggle fiction, but the facts vary in different stories."

Melinda said nothing to that and Hermione continued:"When were you bitten? And…how?"

"A few days ago, before you came here," she answered quietly.

Hermione blinked a few times, not understanding how it was possible.

"Some vampires made a deal with the Death Eaters," Melinda explained, "The vampires would help them conquer the world and in reward they would get free food."

"And the prisoners are free food?" Hermione could not believe what was happening.

Melinda nodded, talking quietly:"Yes, but they never take too much. It happens very rarely that someone dies."

Hermione did not say anything to that. She was completely lost for words. Things were even more horrifying than she imagined. The only things she was completely convinced about was that the Death Eaters were nothing more than animals.

OOO

The fourth day they finally came for her. Hermione was positive they deliberately kept her waiting that long. They wanted her weak, tired, hungry.

She did not struggle as she was led into the dungeon she was in four days ago. This time no chair was waiting for her. She turned to face two man who entered the dungeon. She knew them. They were the same men that had interrogated before. She could not help but shiver at the thought that they probably came up with a plan to force the truth out of her.

"We meet again," the man in the middle spoke, looking at her.

Hermione figured he was the leader, because the other seemed to take his orders and was much younger, her age or perhaps a bit older. She seemed to recall the younger man called the leader 'uncle' the last time.

Hermione did not know if they expected her to answer them. They were looking at her as if they did, but she kept her mouth shut. There was uncomfortable silence until finally someone else walked in as well and Hermione let out a sigh of relief. It was him. Of course it was him. He would not leave her alone. She mentally slapped her for that thought. She needed to distance herself from him, she could not get attached to him if she planned to betray him. What was wrong with her?

And then her heart almost stopped as she noticed that he was not alone. There was girl with him.

It was Melinda.

Lucius pushed the girl towards Hermione and then went to stand along his fellow Death Eaters. Hermione could see Melinda had no idea why she was brought there. There was confusion and fear on her face.

"Why is she here?" Hermione demanded, looking at Lucius, completely ignoring the rest of them.

"She is here to insure you speak the truth and only the truth," Lucius said in a calm and innocent voice.

"What do you mean?" she asked, narrowing her eyes in disbelief.

"I shall demonstrate it," the leader spoke, aiming his wand at Melinda who started shaking with fear, but said nothing.

"What are you-" Hermione started, but was interrupted.

"Crucio!"

Hermione closed her eyes and completely tensed, expecting the pain to hit her, but it never came. But something happened that hurt the same as any curse would. The horrible screams, filled with absolute despair and pain. Melinda was on the floor, her body twisted in a strange way, shaking and kicking, trying to escape the pain, but it was pointless. Hermione fell to her knees, trying to touch Melinda and calm her, but it did not help. The girl seemed to be completely oblivious to her.

"Stop it!" Hermione yelled at the men who stood above her.

They were monsters. They all watched the situation with impassive faces, the screams and the torture not effecting them a bit. Even Lucius. Except that younger man. He was looking down, at his shoes. But did that even matter? It did not cover the fact that he was a Death Eater and probably enjoyed seeing people tortured.

"Stop it already!" Hermione screamed, her face contorted in agony and despair.

"I think that will be enough, Gregory," Lucius finally stepped in, "It think she understood the demonstration," then he smirked at Hermione,"After all, she is a quick learner."

"Step away from the girl," Gregory ordered, still not taking the curse off of Melinda.

Hermione immediately obeyed, standing up and moving a few steps away from her. Gregory finally lifted the curse off of Melinda who curled into a ball, her body shaking with the after spasms of the Cruciatus Curse.

Hermione wanted to reach for her, to see if the girl was alright. What a stupid thought. Of course she was not alright.

"Do you understand the rules of the game?" Gregory asked.

Hermione looked at him with angry eyes, her whole body shaking with unexpressed fury.

"I lie to you and you torture her," she replied as calmly as she could, "That seems a bit tiresome. Why not use Veritaserum instead?"

She knew she was digging her own grave, but she could not help herself. She could not let an innocent person get tortured because of her. And besides, Death Eaters were anything but stupid. They knew about Veritaserum and there had to be a reason why they did not use it.

This time Lucius answered her question.

He looked straight into her eyes as Hermione could recognize arrogance in his gaze as he spoke. "Veritaserum is used only by cowards. We can get the truth out of a person without having to resort to such pathetic methods."

Hermione could not believe his words. Veritaserum was considered a _pathetic_method? And what, torturing innocent people was an act of courage and strength?

"You have got to be kidding me," Hermione whispered before she could stop herself.

"Let us begin," Gregory stated, completely ignoring Hermione's comment.

Melinda was still on the floor, barely moving, probably well aware of the fact that the torture was not finished yet. Hermione could barely stand to look at the poor girl, knowing that it was all her fault. She had not been prepared for that. No one prepared her for the fact that other people might be harmed because of her. Torture was something Hermione was very familiar with. Lucius had taught her so much about the pain and humiliation. It was him who always pushed her to the breaking point. No one else had done it. Even Dolohov could not break her, even after being his captive for a few horrible days, she still had that Gryffindor spirit inside of her.

But this time it was different. She was not prepared for someone else being hurt instead of her. There was one event in the past when Lucius threatened that Ginny would get punished for Hermione's behavior. Hermione could still remember how helpless and guilty she felt. It was enough that she had betrayed her loved ones with her behavior and knowing that someone was in pain because of her was truly a torture.

"Leave her out of this," Hermione demanded, "This is pointless! I have told you everything I know!"

She could see Lucius glare at her, warning her to calm down and obey like a good little girl. But she could not do that. And to think that it was Lucius who gave them the idea of torturing someone else instead of her. Hermione was just bristling with anger, her whole body trembling with unexpressed rage and fear.

"As we do not have much time, I am going to skip to the most important question," Gregory explained.

_Be calm. Simply lie to them. You can do it, Hermione. _

"When did the Resistance contact you?"

"A day before I was caught, late at night, in my room," she answered truthfully.

She decided to tell them everything exactly the way it happened. She was not good at lying and why would she make up stories when she could tell them the truth? The truth about everything, except the names. She could not give them the names.

"And what happened then?"

Hermione took a deep breath, gathering her thoughts and forcing her voice to remain calm as she answered:"I was convinced into working with them. There was a-a man, I don't know his name."

"Can you describe him?"

"He was….tall and had brown hair. He had to be forty-something. I-I don't remember anything else."

Hermione's eyes kept traveling down to Melinda who was still on the floor. Perhaps the girl was seriously injured. And any word that came from Hermione's mouth could injure her further. That was an enormous pressure, almost too much for Hermione.

"And what happened then?" this time it was Lucius who spoke.

Hermione took a shuddering breath, forcing herself to look at him. She could never lie to _him_. Why did he have to be the one to ask the question? A lot of time had passed since she could look into his deep grey eyes, but somehow it seemed as if it was yesterday. She often wondered what was the worst thing he was capable of. What was hiding behind his cold, aristocratic face? What horrors had he seen with his emotionless eyes? How many deaths had his hands caused? After everything he had done, he simply lived on as if nothing had happened. How could he-?

"Answer the question, Mudblood," Gregory barked at her, clearly losing his patience.

That angry voice snapped her out of her thoughts. And then she realized with horror that she could not remember the question. _Damn him_. All he did was look at her and it had such an enormous effect on her.

"What happened then?" Gregory repeated the question and Hermione turned to look at him.

"I- I listened to him and he explained some things, offering me to meet with the leader."

"In the Diagon Alley?"

She quickly nodded:"Yes, that man took me there early in the morning, saying I was to walk around and wait until someone approached me."

Silence filled the dungeon. Hermione could see on Gregory's face that he did not believe her. There was just something. The younger man, his nephew, did not seem to be that interested in the interrogation and Lucius' face betrayed no emotions. It was impossible to tell if he believed her or not.

"They instructed you to walk around?" Gregory asked, one eyebrow raised in suspicion.

Hermione realized that was the part of the story they obviously had trouble believing. But the worst thing she could do now was to change the story. She decided to simply stick to the version she had told them and hope for the best.

"Yes," she confirmed, trying to maintain eye contact with the man who was asking her questions.

He smiled at her, but it was a horrifying smile, there was nothing friendly or warm about it and it literally sent shivers down Hermione's body.

"That was extremely foolish of them, sending you to the Diagon Alley all alone, without your collar," he spoke slowly, "It seems to me that they might have planned your capture."

His words hit her like a slap across the face and her heart almost jumped out of her ribcage, but she tried to keep her face calm. She could only hope they could not see the signs that indicated that she was lying.

"What a-are you saying?" she asked, trying to sound confused, "That they planned it? That they wanted me to get captured?"

She knew she was risking everything by suggesting that, they might see right through her, but she had to do something. Something they did not expect of her.

"They would never such a thing," she added, a fake anger on her face.

"Why would they do that, uncle?" the younger boy asked, clearly believing Hermione's words.

Gregory did not look at him, his eyes were still locked with Hermione's as he spoke:"Do not believe everything you hear, Anton."

_Anton? _

Lucius finally spoke up as he made his way to Hermione and stood beside her:"Why would they want her to get captured?"

Hermione could feel tension rising in the dungeon. As she looked at all their faces she could make no conclusion. All she could read on their faces was skepticism, nothing else.

"Perhaps they wish to contact her while she is our captive," Lucius said calmly, then added,"Perhaps they wish to use her as someone to work from the inside."

At his words Hermione went completely pale. She could literally feel all blood being drained from her face. She tried to make a surprised face at Lucius' suggestion, but she was positive her attempt came out as a grimace.

"Spy?" Gregory asked carefully, eyeing her from head to toe.

Hermione wanted to laugh at them, to say how outrageous that sounded, that they were wrong, but she could not force the words out of her.

But someone did laugh, making everyone else look at him. It was that younger man, Anton.

"Uncle, please," he said, shaking his head, "A spy? Look at her! Small, weak, too young and on top of that a girl."

Hermione hugged herself with her arms, biting hard on her tongue to stop herself from objecting. That man obviously insulted her, but at the same time he was somehow helping her, so she decided to keep silent.

"Completely helpless," Anton sighed, a look of boredom on his face.

"And what harm could such a little girl do to us?" Lucius asked, his voice completely calm.

Hermione had trouble concentrating with him standing that close to her. He was intruding her personal space. If he could only move a few feet away from her it would make everything much easier.

Gregory was obviously still in doubt about her as he narrowed his eyes, thinking hard. "You're hiding something from me, Hermione Granger," he accused her, moderating his tone slightly.

He raised his wand again and pointed it at Melinda who was now cowering in the corner, hugging her knees. She began shaking as she realized what was about to happen, "P-Please…"

Hermione could not allow her to get hurt again. "Leave her alone!" she screamed, her whole body shaking with adrenalin.

That caught Gregory's attention as he turned to look at her, smirking slightly:"The story you have told us is…hard to believe. There is something else. And you will tell us."

With those words he turned to Melinda again and Hermione make a step forward to object again, but was stopped by a hand on her wrist. Her head snapped towards Lucius and he simply glared at her with a warning in his eyes. And then he shook his head slightly, barely noticeable.

"Crucio."

The dungeon was again filled with Melinda's screams of pure agony. Hermione turned her head away, not able to stand to sight of it. She noticed Anton was looking away as well and that seemed strange to her, but there was no time to analyze it.

"Stop it!" she screamed at Gregory and roughly pulled her wrist out of Lucius' grasp. To her surprise Gregory lifted the curse and Melinda's screams slowly turned into silent cries.

"Are you willing to tell us the rest of the story?" he asked calmly as if he had not just tortured a young girl a minute ago.

"What truth?" Hermione could no longer control her voice, "I have told you everything I know and it's not my problem if you don't believe me!"

Gregory did not even respond to that as he turned his attention to Melinda again and pointed his wand at her.

And then something unexpected happened.

Hermione lost complete control over herself. She lunged herself at Gregory in an attempt to stop him, to take his wand, to snap it in two, to hurt him. She only succeeded to scratch him on the neck before she was pulled away by someone behind her. She struggled hard, kicking and screaming, but the person who held her was too strong, wrapping his arms around her stomach and not letting her go.

Hermione knew exactly who that person was and it the midst of all that chaos, she caught herself thinking about how familiar it felt to have his arms around her body. It did not feel awkward or wrong. Ever since she returned home she began to notice how even her father's touch seemed to upset her. But Lucius' touch felt natural. As if he was the only one who had the right to touch her.

"Shh," she heard him whisper in her ear and slowly she stopped struggling and went completely still in his arms.

"You scratched me, you filthy bitch," Gregory barked at her, "You can only hope I did not get some kind of a disease from you."

This time when he raised his wand, it was not pointed at Melinda. Hermione's eyes widened as she realized what was about to happen. She did not even have the time to struggle against Lucius as the curse hit her.

_Pain._She had experienced the Cruciatus Curse before. Lots of times before. She knew it hurt like hell, but she couldn't remember the feeling, she couldn't bring the memory of it back. She was positive that even if she was tortured daily with it, every time would seem like a first time.

_Fire. Stabbing knives. Bones breaking. Muscles tearing. _And_ screaming_. She could hear her own screams as if they were coming from another person.

She was losing herself. She could not _think_. She could not _breath_. All she could do was scream.

_Stop! Stop! Stop! Please! _

Her body was twisting unnaturally, trying to break free, to escape from the agonizing pain.

And then finally it was over and she could breath again.

Silence.

Everything was quiet.

Hermione could only hear her own breathing, coming out in short gasps. And then she realized that she was not on the ground. Someone was holding her. Someone had their arms wrapped around her.

It was _him_. He was…_holding_ her. He was holding her the whole time. And his hands were exactly where…where he should _not_be touching her. His hands were exactly there, where something of his was growing inside of her. And he still did not know.

_Oh God. _

She let out a silent cry as something stabbed her exactly where he was holding her. She did not dare to move, hoping it would pass. But it did not. The feeling turned into something so painful she doubled over.

"What are you playing at now, Mudblood?" Gregory asked, losing his patience with her.

Hermione could not answer him, she could not speak. Each time she took a breath, something stabbed her. But from the inside. Her hands moved to her lower stomach, placing her hands over Lucius' where he was still holding her.

"Mudblood?" she heard him ask from behind her.

She simply shook her head, not able to speak. Perhaps it would pass if she simply stood very still and waited a few more moments. It seemed to be working, but just as she took a deep breath, it stabbed her again, this time harder than before. She let out a loud cry, not caring how weak she sounded.

"What have you done to h-her?" she heard Melinda ask, her voice filled with panic.

"Anton, take the garbage back to the cell," Gregory ordered.

Hermione had her eyes closed, but she heard as Anton and Melinda left the dungeon.

"It think you should leave as well," Lucius spat out with venom.

"I hardly believe this interrogation is over yet and-"

Lucius cut him off with with a dangerous snarl:"_I_ believe it is over. _Leave_."

Hermione could feel the authority in Lucius' tone and no doubt Gregory could feel it too. After a long moment of silence he left.

"He is gone, you can stop pretending now," Lucius spoke from behind her.

Hermione opened her eyes in shock. He thought she was pretending? Just as he was about to pull away from her, Hermione grabbed his hands, holding them in place.

"Please-" she started, not knowing how to ask him for help. She could barely speak.

After a long moment of silence she could feel his body tense against hers.

"You are not pretending?"

She only managed to shake her head, holding the tears back. She was in pain and she was scared, not knowing where that pain was coming from or how serious it was. She had her suspicions, but it could not be that, could it?

It felt as if something was moving inside her lower stomach and it was contracting, causing horrible pain.

"Where does it hurt?" he asked calmly, "Sit down."

After slowly lowering her to the ground, Hermione managed to lean against the wall, shaking terribly and holding her stomach. She could feel Lucius' eyes travel up and down her body.

"These might be the after-spasms of the Cruciatus Curse," he said to her, but Hermione shook her head. It was not that. It was something more.

"It should pass after a while," Lucius' voice had a strange tone in it. He seemed calm, but something was very off about him. Perhaps it was concern, Hermione thought, then reminded herself that she should not even be thinking about it.

She could not ask him for help. He must not know about her condition. Not yet. And perhaps it was not even connected to her condition. But she needed someone that could –.

_Snape. _

Without further thinking she used the bracelet she was given to contact him if she needed help. She rubbed the stone as Snape had instructed her, hoping he would keep his word and come see her.

Taking a deep breath she closed her eyes and tried to relax, but she could not even sit still. She kept wincing and rocking back and forth, her hands still on her stomach.

After a few minutes of complete silence, Lucius knelt down next to her. Hermione found him looking at her with a strange expression on his face. He was a smart man. It was only a matter of time when would figure out what was wrong with her. And Hermione did not want that. He might kill her once he discovered her condition. So she forced herself to move her hands away from her stomach, placing them on her knees.

"What were you thinking attacking a Death Eater?" he asked, shaking his head in disapproval, then smirking, "I should have expected that from you."

She narrowed her eyes at him, not knowing what he meant by his words.

"Still a Gryffindor," he added, "Going into a battle, knowing you have no chance of winning."

Hermione swallowed hard, then quietly spoke:"I couldn't let them torture her because of me."

He smiled coldly then raised his eyebrow in interest:"You would risk your own life helping someone else? Even if there was no hope of winning?"

"I would try," she whispered, then asked quietly,"That was your idea, right? Torturing her instead of me?"

He stared at her for a few moments, then simply nodded:"If you played by my rules, you would come out unharmed."

Hermione was completely hypnotized by his grey eyes. There was so much depth in them. They held mystery and secrets to his behavior. Why would he want her to be unharmed? Why would he help her? What was she to him?

She winced in surprise when the dungeon doors opened with a loud noise. Lucius stood up and moved away from her and then Snape entered. Hermione let out a sigh of relief at seeing him. He kept his word after all.

"Severus?" Lucius looked at him with surprise, "Is something the matter?"

Snape's eyes moved slowly from Hermione's form on the floor to Lucius standing before him.

"There is trouble with our new captives," Snape spoke slowly, "I think your presence is needed."

Lucius let out a sigh of annoyance, "What have they done this time?" with those words he walked past Snape, then stopped and motioned towards Hermione, "Severus, could you do a quick examination?"

"What for?"

"After effects of the Cruciatus," he answered, then looking one last time at Hermione before leaving the dungeon.

Snape waited a few moments then approached her, a curious expression on is face.

"What happened?"

"I-I don't know," her voice shook s she spoke, "They used the C-Cruciatus and then …"

Snape knelt down to her, eyeing her form carefully.

"Where do you feel the pain?"

Hermione did not answer, she simply placed her hands on her stomach and hoped he would understand. The pain was not as horrible as before, but it still hurt.

"Describe it."

"I-It feels as if something was contracting o-or moving, stabbing me."

Snape nodded,"When was the last time you ate?"

She shook her head,"I don't remember. I can't even force myself to-" She trailed off, not wanting to finish the sentence.

"Are you bleeding anywhere?" he suddenly asked and it caused Hermione to retreat a bit away from him, hugging herself with her arms.

"N-No, I don't think so," she replied quietly, "What does that have to do-"

"Miss Granger," he interrupted her, letting out a deep breath before asking, "How far along are you?"

Hermione opened her mouth in shock and for a few long moments she simply stared at him, wondering if she heard him right, "E-Excuse me?"

Snape rolled his eyes in annoyance, "You heard the question, Granger."

"I-I don't know what you are talking about," she answered, looking away from him. She could feel her hands shake as her heart beat accelerated and there was a feeling as if her head was on fire. She could feel her cheeks becoming more red by each passing moment.

"I have had my suspicions ever since that night at your house," Snape spoke quietly.

Hermione forced out a laugh,"You are wrong. What made you think I am…t-that I am…" she could not even bring herself to say the word.

"I notice details better than most people," he explained coldly, "Considering what happened between you and Lucius-"

"Nothing happened!" Hermione raised her voice, then gasped as the pain hit her again. She took a few short breaths, then whispered, "Nothing happened."

When she looked at Snape she noticed his eyes softened, even though his face was unreadable. She looked away, not wanting his pity.

"It did happen," Snape's voice was gentle, "I myself have seen the evidence, the bruises on your thighs. Do you remember?"

Hermione could feel her throat close up and tears building in her eyes. She had never before spoken with anyone about that. It happened and Hermione never had that chance to fully think about it and recover. She never truly accepted it.

She slowly looked up at Snape, her lower lip trembling. After what seemed like hours she finally nodded and Snape recognized it as a sign to continue.

"You are not feeling well, you avoid food, you suffer from sickness and dizziness. The Cruciatus Curse caused severe cramping-"

"Please," she whispered, nearly inaudible. She was scared now. She felt a few tears slip uncontrollably down her face. She did not want to hear the truth. She was not prepared for it yet.

"After putting all those things together I came to a conclusion," Snape explained, then looked at her with his dark eyes," I ask you, are you completely positive?"

Hermione wiped the tears away from her face and shook her head, clearing her throat before she spoke:"N-No, I haven't done any tests, if that's what you mean. B-But I'm positive."

"Are you sure?" he insisted.

Hermione nodded again. She was sure, she was more than sure. She did not need medical tests to know if something was growing inside of her. Snape was a man. He could not understand it.

"I'm sure," she said quietly, looking down, "I noticed changes and I haven't had my…I-I don't even remember the last time."

Snape let out a long sigh, then nodded,"How far along are you?" he repeated the question from the beginning.

"Less than two months," she whispered.

"You should have told me," slight anger showed in Snape's voice, "What were you thinking, you silly girl? You cannot deal with such dangerous things while carrying a ch-"

"Don't say it!" Hermione cut him off, "Please."

Snape closed his eyes for a moment to calm himself down. When he spoke again, it was barely above a whisper:"I presume Lucius does not know anything."

Hermione's eyes went wide and she shook her head frantically:"No! A-And he can't know."

"He is not stupid, Granger," Shape warned her, "He will figure it out. It is only a matter of time."

"I know," she muttered under her breath.

"Do you realize the severity of the situation?"

Hermione could feel the anger in Snape's tone even though he was obviously trying to hide it.

He continued with a serious expression:"We cannot pull you out, Granger. You will have to continue what you started."

"I never said I want to be pulled out."

Snape gave her a hard look before asking:"You are still willing to help us?"

"Yes, as long as I'll be able to," she stated.

They simply stared at each other for a few long moments. Snape probably expected her to break under his cold glare, but Hermione held her own, a determined expression on her face.

"I cannot imagine what Lucius' reaction will be like," Snape finally spoke, "We cannot protect you from that."

"I can protect myself from him," she said quietly.

Snape nodded and having nothing to say, he pulled a small vial from a pocket inside his robes,"When I felt you calling me, I grabbed the pain relieving potion."

He handed it to her and she accepted it, smiling in gratitude.

"I'm sorry," she said weakly, looking down at the vial in her hands.

Snape raised his eyebrow in confusion:"For what exactly, Miss Granger?"

"For putting you in trouble, for making everything more complicated, for being….for being in this condition."

"Miss Granger," he said with a strong voice, "Look at me."

When she did not obey, he repeated the order in his teaching voice,"Look at me."

This time she did meet his eyes.

"Yes, you have put us in quite a predicament by hiding your condition and yes, that was a bad decision."

Hermione bit her lower lip and looked down again.

"But," he continued after a long pause, "do I find you as the one to blame? No. You had no choice. I hold Lucius Malfoy responsible for everything."

Hermione's logical side was agreeing with him, everything he said was true, but at the same time…She was not as innocent as people might think. It was normal that everyone would blame Lucius, he was a Death Eater, a murderer. He was the one who kidnapped her and made her his slave. He was the one who tortured her and played mind games with her.

But deep down Hermione could not blame him for everything. He was not guilty for Hermione's betrayal. He had given her many choices and she always seemed to choose the wrong option. She could easily refuse him when he offered her the ultimatum of leaving the Manor or staying and sharing his bed. But she didn't. She gave up her beliefs and did many dishonorable things in order to stay alive. She wondered how come the Sorting Hat did not put her into Slytherin.

"Have you found out anything useful yet?"

Snape's question pulled her out of her thoughts and she shook her head, finally drinking the pain relieving potion. Instantly she felt pain slowly lessening to a degree where it was bareable.

"I don't think I'll be able to do anything while here," she confessed, "I rarely even see him."

"You need to find a way back to your place beside him," Snape advised her, then added quietly, "You must do it no matter what. Our goal is the only thing that matters."

Hermione understood what he was trying to say. She could read between lines. Lucius had to trust her again, he had to want her again. And she was to accomplish that no matter what she had to offer.

Snape stood up, preparing to leave," I will try to see you as much as possible. Be careful."

With those words he left. Hermione felt uneasy once she was alone again. It was comforting having someone who knew exactly what she was doing. She did not have to pretend when she was talking to him. Especially now when he knew exactly what her big secret was.

But now she was alone again. And she knew exactly what to do the next time she saw Lucius. She was a prisoner for a couple of days already and she had not achieved anything. Apart from getting an innocent girl tortured. She needed to pull herself together and do what she was supposed to do. Even if that meant humiliating herself and offering him something he would not be able to refuse. She was aware of the fact that Lucius felt very possessive of her, he felt like she belonged to him and he was very protective of his possessions. She had to use that against him. The faith of the Magical and the Muggle World rested upon her shoulders now. She was connected to Lucius and she had to destroy him even if that meant hurting herself. Sacrifices are always needed to archive a goal.

**A/N: Hey, guys! I'm back! And this has to be the longest chapter yet in the WotS! I promise action in the next chapter, as well as some sexiness. Hope you haven't given up on me! Tell me what you think! :)**


	7. Bitten

Chapter 7 **BITTEN**

_Crying._

_Baby crying._

_Where was it coming from? _

_Loud, persistent crying. _

_Hermione could feel her heart racing. She could not understand the need she felt to find the child and comfort it. Where was it coming from? _

_She looked around, noticing she was in an unfamiliar room. Everything was dark but the threat was nothing new to Hermione. She was not afraid of the dark as she used to be. _

_The baby continued to cry, even louder than before. Hermione felt completely helpless but at the same time determined. She needed to find the baby. It…It felt like it belonged to her. _

_There was no one in the room. _

_Without thinking Hermione flew out of the room and found herself in a long, dark corridor. It was so long she could not see the end of it. A strange feeling of panic and horror crept up her spine. _

_Where was she? What was happening? _

_There were so many doors. How was she able to tell which ones were the right choice?_

_She opened the first door, but did not enter. She could not believe what she was seeing. _

_"Hermione!"_

_"'Mione? Come in!"_

_Harry and Ron. They were alive. And they were happy. The room was bright and Hermione could simply feel the positive energy coming from it. There were other people too. Hagrid, Ginny, Neville, Professor McGonagail, everyone she knew from Hogwarts, the Weasley family. They were all happy and they were all inviting her to come in._

_"Hurry, Hermione," George said to her, smiling._

_"Yeah, you wouldn't want to miss the party," Fred added, poking his twin with his elbow. _

_Hermione could feel tears of pure joy forming in her eyes. Everyone was alive and everyone was happy. _

_Ron. _

_He was looking at her, wearing one of his sweetest smiles and eating a cake at the same time. Hermione giggled at the scene in front of her and made a step to enter the room, but then she heard the crying again. _

_Immediately she realized she could not enter the room, she did not belong there. She had to keep searching. _

_"I'm sorry-" she said quietly, then turned and left closing the doors behind her. _

_"Wait-" she heard Harry say after her, but she was already gone. If she stayed there any longer, she wouldn't be able to leave._

_She slowly walked down the dark corridor, stopping by the fifth door. She heard voices, familiar voices. Opening the door, she was met with a sight of her parents. They were in their living room, talking and laughing. Hermione stood frozen, her heart breaking for some reason. _

_Then they noticed her. _

_"Hermione, dear, come join us," her mother offered her a friendly smile, extending her arm towards her. _

_"I can't," was all Hermione could say, her voice almost breaking._

_"Why not, honey?" her father asked worriedly, standing up._

_Crying. Hermione could hear it again. _

_"I-I don't belong here anymore," she answered without thinking, not able to tear her eyes away from her family. She wanted to be with them, she loved them so much but deep down she knew it was not possible. _

_"I love you both," she said to them, then closed the doors and quickly walked away, barely able to see anything through her tears. _

_It was strange. She felt miserable and it hurt so much leaving them, but at the same time it felt right. It was the right thing to do. _

_She followed the sound of crying, concentrating only on that. Finally she reached the right room. The sound of crying was definitely coming from that room. Hermione hesitantly reached from the doorknob and opened the doors. _

_She recognized that room. It was his bedroom. The bedroom where she spent a few long months of her life. The bedroom where everything changed. It was exactly as she remembered it._

_Except…_

_Beside the bed there stood a wooden cradle. Hermione did not remember that. Slowly she walked over to it and with each step that she took her heart started beating faster. Then she finally reached it and looked inside. _

_That was what she was searching for. Her goal. Her purpose._

_A small baby was looking up at her, smiling innocently and trying to reach up to her. Hermione simply stood there, shocked. It was a little baby girl. She had blonde hair and brown eyes and she was…beautiful. Hermione smiled, reached down to her and gently took her into her arms. It felt right. _

_Then suddenly someone was behind her. Hermione tensed in fear and pulled the baby tighter against her chest, feeling the need to protect the child. _

_His breath hit her ear, dispersing her panic, generating warmth throughout her body. The hands circled around her waist, pulling her tight, embracing her fully. She recognized him. Her body relaxed and fell back against his chest. His chin nuzzled her hair as they stood calmly, without saying anything. _

_"Father?"_

_His arms moved away from her immediately as they both turned around to face the person who interrupted them._

_Hermione could not believe her eyes. It was Draco. But…he was dead, wasn't he? He looked exactly the same as she remembered him. Almost his father's copy. Except the eyes. Only Lucius' eyes held such depth in them. _

_Hermione took a step back, noticing the fury on Draco's face. _

_"Father, how could you?" he demanded, "How could you do this to our family?"_

_Lucius did not reply. He simply stood there, looking at his son._

_"Draco-" Hermione started, but was cut off by him._

_"Do not dare speak to me, Granger!"_

_She flinched at the pure rage in his voice. Never before had she heard him talk in such a manner. And it frightened her. She was never before afraid of him, but now it was a completely different story. That was not the Draco she knew. _

_"Father, end this. Get rid of her."_

_Hermione looked at Lucius as he finally turned to her, his face blank. There were absolutely no emotions whatsoever. He stepped closer to her and Hermione wanted to move away, but found it impossible to. She could not move from the spot she was standing on. She could do nothing as Lucius took the baby from her arms, turned and left without words._

_"Lucius! Wait! Where are you taking her? Please-" she screamed in terror, "Lucius!"_

Hermione awoke with a scream. It took a few long moments for her to realize where she was and that it was only a dream. Her heart was racing uncontrollably, horrible images still in her mind. Taking a deep breath, Hermione wiped the sweat from her forehead and tried to calm down.

_It was only a dream._

Hermione was not the one to search deeper meaning in dreams. In her opinion dreams were simply reflections of the subconscious and nothing more. Dreams did not predict the future.

But then why did she dream about Lucius taking the baby away from her? Was that her hidden fear? But it was impossible. Lucius wouldn't do that. Instead he would get rid of the..._fetus_ as soon as he found out. Hermione was completely positive he would not allow the child to be even born. With a deep sigh she concluded that the dreams were completely pointless and not worthy to lose time thinking about it.

Looking around she realized she was still alone in the dungeon. She wondered what time it was. What day it was. She had been back in the Wizarding world for a few days and still there was no progress. She hadn't done anything helpful yet. Letting out an angry sigh, she decided to do what ever would be necessary to return to Lucius.

ooo

Hermione was soon returned to the cell where the other prisoners were. She sat alone in the corner, observing what was happening around her. The other prisoners were quiet, no one was talking. They seemed dead inside. Hermione couldn't help but wonder how long ago they had been captured.

How long ago had she been captured? She was hungry, her stomach was protesting painfully, but there was nothing she could do about it. They would not let her starve to death, she was sure of that, but they liked torturing her, seeing how long she would last.

Hermione noticed that Melinda was standing, leaning against the bars, lost in her thoughts. She wanted to talk to the girl, it was obvious she knew a lot more than she let on. And Hermione needed information. She needed –

Suddenly Melinda backed away from the bars, she stopped only when her back hit the wall. There was a look of fear and panic on her face and Hermione turned her head to see what had caused that kind of reaction. And then she noticed him. A young man was walking towards the cell. Hermione recognized him. He was one of the men who witnessed her torture the previous day. He had to be twenty-something. Hermione stood up as he walked into the cell. There was a horrifying silence, Hermione could see everyone was afraid of him, but could not understand why. He did not seem that terrifying to her. He was tall and dark, with black eyes. Hermione had never in her life seen someone with such dark eyes. And they held such mystery in them. His look was intense and hypnotizing.

He looked at each and every one of the prisoners and then his eyes stopped on Hermione and she could not look away from him.

After a long moment of silence, he finally spoke:"You."

There was no doubt that he meant Hermione. His voice was so cold and it cut through her like a knife. She swallowed hard, but still could not look away from him.

"Come with me," he ordered and gestured her to follow him out of the cell. It was only when he turned his back to her that she could look away. She saw Melinda shaking her head slightly, panic evident in her eyes. Hermione looked away from the girl and walked out of the cell, standing next to the young man. She hugged herself with her arms and waited.

"Follow me."

And she did. Without questions. She did not understand what he could possibly want from her. Was he taking her to another questioning? She hoped not, she could not stand being tortured again. He led her into another dungeon. It was empty. Hermione turned around to face him as he locked the doors and then looked at her.

"Hermione Granger," he spoke, a weak smile playing at his lips.

His eyes were so dark and intense. Hermione found it hard to concentrate while looking at him. He was quite handsome, she noticed.

"My name is Anton," he said, "Do you remember me?"

"How could I forget?" she shot back before she could stop herself.

She waited in fear for his reaction, but he simply smiled at her. Hermione could feel something was wrong. She did not believe in sixth sense, but there was definitely something warning her that she was in a dangerous situation.

"What do you want?" she asked, keeping her voice strong, "Why did you bring me here?"

"You'll see soon enough," was his only answer.

He took a step closer to her and Hermione backed away, until she was met with a wall. She reminded herself to stay calm and not show fear.

_Breath, Hermione._

As he approached her, the look in his eyes changed. There was something animalistic in it, something so primal it scared her.

"I want something from you," he said in a low voice.

Hermione could feel his cold breath on her face, she felt trapped and wanted to push him away, but for some reason she stayed still.

"Will you let me?" he asked quietly and that surprised her.

She forced herself to speak:"What do you want?"

His hand touched her arm and then lazily made it's way up until it reached her neck. Hermione could not help but shiver at the contact. It felt _wrong_. Gently, he pushed her hair back, revealing her neck.

"Don't," was all she could say. She did not even know what she was asking him not to do. What did he want from her? She whimpered as acidic fear filled her stomach. And then she started struggling, trying to escape from him. But he was stronger, pressing his body against hers, grabbing her wrists and holding her still.

"Don't do this," she tried again, her body now shaking uncontrollably.

He pulled her head to the side very gently, although Hermione could not fight the strength he used on her. He lowered his head and licked the salty skin beneath her ear, making Hermione tremble even more.

She knew there would be no one to save her this time. She would have to deal with whatever he had planned to do with her. Tears started to build inside her eyes at the horrible realization. It was obvious what he wanted from her. And Hermione could not do anything to stop him. She bit down on her tongue, preventing herself to speak. She would not beg. No matter what happened, she would not beg.

She was frightened, but could not bring herself to resist him. As if in trance, she almost melted at his touch. He looked deep into her eyes and Hermione opened her mouth to speak, but no sound came out. His eyes lit up and his nostrils twitched and instead of kissing her he ran his fingers gently down her throat.

He leaned in closer, avoiding her mouth and suddenly Hermione's eyed snapped open as she felt him grab her neck and draw her throat to his mouth, her breath quickening. She began to panic, trying to push him away and then she felt a sharp pain at her throat. A realization dawned on her as her throat started burning. She could feel his arm around her waist, holding her as her legs turned into jelly. He was _drinking_ from her, _feeding_ from her. The pain was still present, but after a few moments it felt like sweet release, all worries and feelings seemed to be ebbing and she relaxed into his embrace. She knew he was taking the life away from her, but she couldn't move. His body was shaking violently against hers, it was as if he had turned into an animal.

Everything turned black and Hermione's eyes closed against her will. The last thing she could remember before falling into unconsciousness was the feeling of life being sucked out of her.

ooo

She felt so weak. There was no horrible pain, but she could not move. Her eyelids felt so heavy, _too_ heavy. After a few futile attempts to open her eyes, she gave in and instead focused on her surroundings. She could feel a soft mattress underneath her and that surprised her. Wherever she was, it was warm and it had a pleasant smell. She was not in a dungeon, she could tell that much.

Letting out a deep sigh, she tried to put together the events that led to her condition. She could remember being in the dungeon with other prisoners, then being taken away by someone. A man. Young man. It took her a few moments to remember his name. _Anton_. He attacked her. _Hypnotized_ her. Why did she not fight back harder? He _bit_ her. At that memory, she tried to touch her neck to check for the wound, but her hand was too heavy to move. All she could manage was the slight movement with her fingers.

She hated the feeling of weakness. It was frustrating that her own body refused to obey her. Determined to make a move, she gathered all her strength and opened her eyes slightly. She was met with strong light which hurt her eyes and she immediately closed them once again. Sighing in frustration, she tried again and this time it hurt less to keep her eyes open.

She was in an unknown room, but it was nicely decorated. She noticed she was lying in a four poster bed with purple sheets.

_Where am I? Who brought me here?_

Panic started building inside her as she realized it might be Anton. Staying at the vampire's house was not something she was comfortable with. She tried to get up, but her body would not move. Nothing hurt, but she simply had no energy to move. She concluded it was probably because of the blood loss. She gave in, not able to fight with her body. She couldn't even call Snape for help. The last thought before she fell back to sleep, was that the next time she woke up she would have her strength back.

ooo

A few hours later she finally woke up. This time she had no trouble opening her eyes. She was still in the same room, but this time it felt different. She could feel something was off. She was not alone. Slowly turning her head to the left, she gasped at the sight of him.

_Lucius._

He was standing next to the bed, looking at her. He was dressed in black robes and Hermione noticed buttons in the shape of snakes that went down the front. She could not help but let out a sigh of relief at seeing him.

"It's you," she whispered and smiled weakly.

He noticed it as he lifted his eyebrow in interest,"Are you glad to see me?"

Hermione decided to ignore his question, not feeling strong enough to play mind games with him.

"What happened?" she quietly asked.

"You don't remember?"

"I-I do," she admitted, "I remember being taken to the dungeon, then- "

She made a disgusted face and her hand flew to her neck, examining the wound. It wasn't as horrible as she had expected. She barely felt anything, it was already healed. All Hermione could feel was a small scar.

"I don't understand," she confessed, looking at Lucius for answers.

"What do you not understand?"

"What happened? How did I get here? Who healed me?" there were so many questions on her mind and she needed answers.

Lucius took a deep breath and Hermione noticed he was in a bad mood. Even more than usual. His eyes held something dark, something twisted. As he looked at her again, she saw it. There was _disgust_ in his eyes. He hadn't looked at her like that for such a long time. She could not even remember the last time. What changed?

Lucius cleared his throat before speaking:"It was not supposed to happen."

"What was not supposed to happen?"

"No one was allowed to feed from you."

Hermione remained silent, expecting him to continue, but when he did not, she was forced to ask:"Why?"

"You are still mine," his voice was hard as he spoke, "No matter where you have been for the last two months, you still belong to me. You were marked by me. And me only," his face tensed as he continued, "And now-"

She could not even argue about belonging to him. It was something she deep down knew it was true. And it was her fault as well. She had allowed herself to accept him as her...owner. She had allowed him inside her head.

He continued, not looking at her:"Being bitten by a vampire-"

"I know what it means," she cut him off, "Between vampires it's an act of ownership. It's a mark."

Lucius nodded, finally looking at her.

It was then that Hermione understood his behavior:"Are you angry because-"

"It is pointless to talk about it," then he added, "There is Blood-Replenishing Potion on the nightstand. Drink it."

He walked to the doors, but Hermione stopped him before he could leave the room.

"Wait! What happens now?" she asked, even more confused than before.

"You will stay here. There is no need to return to the dungeons anymore."

"How? Wouldn't it be suspicious-"

"I have convinced them you hold no useful information and even if you did, I would have better chance at getting it from you if you stayed here."

Hermione nodded, satisfied with how things have turned out.

"But...I have never before been in this room. Your bedroom-"

"My bedroom in next to this room, but that is no business of yours. You will be staying here," he explained, "Rest."

With those words he left the room.

Hermione had so many questions to ask him. But at the same time she was glad she was left alone, she had a few things she needed to think through. Lot of things. But first she took the small bottle of the Blood-Replenishing Potion in her hand and drank it. She needed her strength back.

Her thoughts were focused on Lucius. Why was he acting weird around her? It was like he did not want to get close to her, as if she was contagious. She had read a lot of books about vampires and she knew well enough what being marked by one meant. The marked person was prohibited to other vampires. It was a big deal in the vampire world and she did not think it would have such an effect on Lucius. He probably thought his ownership over her was _dirtied_.

But she herself did not feel dirty. _Used_, maybe, but not dirty. She was disappointed in herself for not fighting back more. There was something in his eyes, something that completely hypnotized her. She was not able to resist him.

At least she was back with Lucius. She would be able to get close to him. And that was the thing she wanted the most. It would be impossible for her to do anything useful while in the dungeon.

She felt a twinge of guilt at remembering all the prisoners that were still down in the dungeons. _Melinda_. Would she ever see her again?

But then she reminded herself why she was doing this. Her mission was important and if she succeeded, then there would be no more slaves. That goal seemed so far away, unreachable even. But she would not allow herself to lose hope.

ooo

It was in the middle of the night when Hermione woke up again, this time feeling much better. She was a lot stronger than a couple of hours ago. Lifting herself up from the bed, she looked around, making sure she was alone. Then she slowly made her way to the bathroom, feeling the need to take a bath. She couldn't remember the last time she was allowed to clean herself. As she stood up, she got a bit light-headed, but it passed after a few moments.

As she sat in the tub filled with hot water, she finally let herself relax.

ooo

The next day Hermione was completely recovered. Apart from the occasional dizziness, she felt nothing from the attack. There was a delicious breakfast waiting for her when she woke up. Scrambled eggs, sausage and a glass of orange juice that kept refilling itself. She could not remember when was the last time she ate and her stomach had been protesting for the last two days. After eating everything, she felt even more strength return to her. And the best part was that there was so morning sickness that day. She could easily pretend that her condition was not real as she was not ready to face the truth just yet.

Lucius hadn't visited her in the morning. Hermione spent the whole day in her room, sitting by the window and thinking. It was dark already. The weather was awful, it was raining heavily, but Hermione did not mind at all. The weather somehow illustrated how she was feeling on the inside. She flinched a little as the horrible sound of the thunder cut through the silence.

_What am I doing?_

Why was she loosing time and sitting in the room, waiting for...waiting for what? She did not know where Lucius was or when will he be returning or even if he would pay a visit to her room. She was sick and tired of relaying on him. She needed to do something.

The doors weren't locked, she knew that much. But where would she go? What could she possibly find in the house to help her? She could not answer that, but she knew she could not hide in the room all the time. After a few long moments of deciding what to do, she finally stood up and walked to the door.

She did not know what she was doing or what she was looking for. If Lucius caught her sneaking around the house, she would be in a lot of trouble. Was he even in the house? It was in the middle of the night.

She could remember the long hallway. So many things happened there. The memory of Philix suddenly came back to her. She could clearly remember how she stood up against him, not allowing him to enter Lucius' bedroom. She had been so foolish thinking she stood a chance against him in a duel. She was blind, for Merlin's sake. It all resulted in her falling down the stairs. Luckily, Snape arrived just in time to...kill Phillix before he could kill her and Lucius. Hermione did not like to think about those times. Too much pain, too many horrible memories. What she had done...she even killed a person. To save _him_. To save Lucius.

She pushed those dark thoughts away. Now was not the time to think about it. Slowly, she made her way down the hall, deciding which room to try. Finally she stopped in front of the random door, taking a deep breath.

She placed her hand on the doorknob, leaned against the door and listened for any sound. When she heard nothing, she slowly pushed it open and walked inside. It seemed to be the study room. It appeared to be empty. She noticed several papers were on the desk and she walked over to them. But before she could reach for the papers, she heard a voice.

_"Who are you?"_

It startled her so much, she almost let out a shriek, her hand covering her mouth in shock. Her whole body was shaking terribly as she looked around the room, trying to discover where the voice was coming from.

And then she noticed it. It was a woman on the one of the portraits. Hermione did not know what to do and she simply stood there, completely lost for words. The woman was glaring at her accusingly.

_"What are you doing in my husband's study room?"_

Hermione's eyes widened in shock as she realized who she was talking to. It was Narcissa Malfoy. She was so elegant and beautiful, Hermione could not help but admire her.

_"I will not ask you again_," the woman said in a threatening voice.

"I-I'm sorry. I should-" Hermione did not even finish the sentence as she flew out of the room, slamming the doors behind her.

_Stupid, stupid, stupid._

She was still in shock, trying to calm her nerves down, but it was not working. The last thing she expected was to be caught sneaking around the house by Narcissa Malfoy. It would only be a matter of time when Lucius found out. Hermione could not even imagine what his reaction would be like. A horrible shiver ran through her as she realized that perhaps he would start to believe she was a spy. She could not allow that. But how to prevent it? Everything could be put at risk if he as much as thought about it.

As she walked back to her room, she stopped when she reached the doors that led to Lucius' bedroom. There was no doubt that was his bedroom. Even if she was blind, she would recognize it.

_His bedroom_. The room where so many horrible things happened. So many important things. The room where she was humiliated, where she started to doubt herself and her beliefs, where she began to think there might be something more between Lucius and her. Some invisible force was pushing her towards the room. There was that strange feeling, the need to revisit the room. There was no logical explanation and Hermione did not like that, but she could not ignore it.

As she slowly approached the door, she heard noise coming from the room. There was no talking, simply noises. _Thumping_ mostly...and deep breathing and..._moaning_. Quietly, she pushed the door open, her eyes going wide at the sight of what was happening.

_Oh my gods._

There was Lucius on the bed with some woman. They both had their backs turned to Hermione and were too distracted to notice her. Hermione couldn't see the woman's face as her head was on the mattress with her blonde hair sprawled all around her. Lucius was behind her, cowering her body with his, pounding into the woman, gripping her waist and driving into her. His head was bent forward, his hair swinging around his head as he focused, letting out groans of pleasure.

Hermione felt sick to her stomach. It did not seem that the woman was being forced, she seemed to be enjoying herself quite a lot. And Lucius...his back was covered in sweat and his muscles were flexing as he continued to...

Hermione couldn't take it anymore. She turned and ran to her room, trying to get those disgusting images out of her mind. Her breath was coming out in short gasps and her hands were shaking violently.

She sat on the bed, forcing herself to take a deep breath, but nothing helped. She could see them clearly in her head as if they were in front of her. It was _disgusting_.

Hermione could not understand why it was affecting her so much. There was nothing between her and Lucius. Never was and never will be. Then she remembered and her hand slowly dropped to her belly.

Tears of anger started to build in her eyes and no matter how hard she tried to ignore them, they finally spilled down her cheeks. She was furious. How dare he? How dare he destroy her life? He was the who picked her out of the crowd, who brought her to his Manor, who humiliated her, her tortured her, who took her dignity and her innocence. She could still feel every time he had touched her, like he had burned its memory into her skin, every lick, every bite, and definitely every slap and every curse was searing her body like she had been doused in acid and it was slowly eating away her sanity. And now there was something of his inside of her, living, growing. She was disgusted with herself for thinking about the...fetus that way, but she could not help herself.

What had she done to deserve this? She was not the one who killed Draco. She never wished for anything to happen to him. If she could, she would bring him back to life. She would bring back to life Harry and Ron and Fred and everyone else who did not deserve to die.

Hermione brushed the tears away, but the anger was still not leaving. What was bothering her so much? Perhaps the fact that while she was stuck with a reminder of him, while she was suffering from mood swings and sickness, he was enjoying the life, shagging some whore in his bedroom, the room where they...where their...baby was conceived.

_God, it sounds wrong._

She still could not bring herself to call it _baby_. Was she a horrible person because of it?

She threw herself on the bed, pushing her head into the pillow and letting out a horrible scream, filled with pain and anger and frustration, not caring if anyone heard her.

She could not sleep that night. No matter how hard she tried, she could not push those images of him and that woman out of her mind. It kept replaying, over and over again, driving her crazy.

After a few long hours she succeeded in calming herself down a bit. Her logical side kicked in and she wondered why did that scene upset her so much. Lucius was a man and he had his needs. What did she expect? That he would start enjoying the celibate life after his wife's death?

Perhaps it was jealousy. The moment that thought formed in her mind, Hermione pushed it away, not even wanting to consider it. She did not love Lucius. Even though there was a period of time when she naively thought she loved him, she soon realized that was not real. It was simply the need to be close to someone. There was a connection between her and Lucius, but it was not love. And if she did not love him, then there was no chance she was jealous if he was having another woman, Hermione concluded.

Early in the morning, she finally let herself drift to sleep.

ooo

"Is it a custom for you and your people to sleep through half the day?"

Hermione could hear his voice, but it was not enough for her to wake up. She tried to ignore the sound and continue with her sleep.

"Mudblood," he tried again, this time with stronger voice.

Hermione's eyes opened immediately and she blinked a few times to sharpen her vision. After a few moments she pulled herself together and looked at Lucius, who was standing next to her bed. She noticed he was not wearing his long black robes which meant he was not going out. He stood there, wearing simply black pants and black shirt. He was glaring at her and she pulled herself up, noticing there was breakfast waiting for her on the nightstand. Simply the sight of it made Hermione's stomach start making flips. Removing her gaze from it, she set her eyes on Lucius.

"How are you feeling today?" he asked, looking at her down his nose.

_Such an aristocratic face._

"Better," was her only answer.

She could not look at him without feeling disgusted. His hair was now perfect, but yesterday evening it was ruffled. Hermione could still remember how he looked like, his back flexing, his hair hiding his face as he – .

She barely held back the bile rising in her throat at the mere memory of that.

"There are a few things I would like to discuss with you," Lucius said coldly, then added, "But first you can eat."

"I'm not hungry," she shot back a bit too fast.

Lucius' eyebrow shot up in surprise, but he said nothing for a few long moments.

Hermione was nervous, she was thinking about what her answer would be when he confronted her with her late night visit to his study room. Was it possible he did not know yet?

"You are not in a position to refuse food, if anything, you should be grateful," he hissed at her.

Hermione shook her head, "I won't eat. Not now. Perhaps later-"

"You will eat," he ordered and his tone left no room for argument. He even glared at her as if he was daring her to contradict him.

Hermione wanted to know why he was insisting on her eating. Was it simply because he could not stand if she did not follow his orders?

With a deep breath, she looked at the food. Slowly she reached for the French toast and brought it to her mouth. She forced herself not to breath as she took the first bite.

Lucius was still looking at her and Hermione felt uneasy with him staring at her like that. Suddenly she started panicking, fearing he might suspect something. She could not allow that. Not yet. Putting on a strong face, she forced herself to eat the whole toast.

She looked up at Lucius, then a horrible sickness came over her. The toast she had eaten was trying to make it's way back up and Hermione's hand flew over her mouth. Without thinking she ran to the bathroom, dropping to the floor and spilling all the continents of her stomach into the toilet. She felt terrible. So weak and sick. After a few moments she moved away from the toilet and leaned against the wall, pulling her knees up to her chest and taking a few long calming breaths.

She could tell Lucius was standing at the doors, looking down at her. He was quiet and that silence was the most horrifying. She could not tell what he was thinking. She only hoped he did not suspect-.

"What was that all about?" he finally asked, his voice emotionless.

"I-I've been feeling sick for a few days already," Hermione answered, then added, "I've probably caught something while down in that dungeon."

She allowed herself to look at him and he seemed to believe her lie. He simply nodded and approached her.

"Stand up."

Hermione made a move to get up, but her legs were shaking too much. She sat down again, her face defeated, "Can't I just stay here for a while?"

"I have told you we have things to discuss," he said to her in an annoyed tone, then reached down to grab her arm. Hermione flinched away from him, not wanting his hands on her body ever again.

"What are you playing at?" Lucius demanded, slowly becoming annoyed by her behavior.

Without answering Hermione gathered her strength and pulled herself up from the floor, walking past him into the bedroom. She sat on the bed and waited for him.

"Your attitude is becoming tiresome, girl," he drawled, leaning against the bed frame.

Hermione realized that he never sat down while talking to her. He was the one who was always standing, giving him the chance to look down at her. Perhaps he would feel weak and human if he sat down.

"I expect you to answer my questions. And I wish to hear the truth," he said to her slowly.

Hermione simply nodded, taking a deep breath and trying not to look at the rest of the breakfast that was waiting on the nightstand. Simply the thought of food made her sick.

"Why did you come back?"

Hermione's eyes shot towards him and she had to remind herself to stay calm. All she had to do was to repeat the same story she had told before.

"I was contacted by the Resistance. One of them convinced me to return to this world. I was to meet with them in the Diagon Alley," the words were like mantra to her, she had repeated them so many times already.

Lucius' face betrayed no emotions, there was no way Hermione could tell if he believed her or not.

"Why do you think they wanted you back in this world?"

"I-I don't know, perhaps they wanted me to help them..." she trailed off, not knowing if she wanted to finish her sentence.

"Help them do what exactly?" he was not letting that issue slide so easily.

Hermione looked him in the eyes as she quietly said:"To destroy you."

That idea seemed to amuse Lucius as his lips curled up into a smirk. He obviously thought it was impossible for such a small and young girl to do any serious damage to him.

"But you were caught."

Hermione remained silent at that statement.

"What I would like to know is..." he moved closer to her, "...what is it you expect now?"

She did not understand his question, "What do you mean by that?"

"What do you think your role is going to be now? You were my reward when you left and now you are back. Do not expect me to treat you any differently."

That angered Hermione. He was trying to pretend things were like they were at the beginning. And he was wrong.

"Why did you let me go?" she quietly asked, knowing she was pushing him too far, but at that moment she couldn't keep her mouth shut.

His look told her he knew exactly what she meant by her question. He took a deep breath, but did not say anything for a few long moments. Hermione was startled to see his face, stripped of its darkness and malice. He looked almost...human.

"We were hurting each other," he finally let out and even his voice was softer, stripped of it's hard edge," It would not have ended well for us."

"I agree with that," Hermione replied, then cautiously continued, "But you could have killed me. End of the problem. Why didn't you?"

"It would have been so easy," he whispered and it seemed like he was talking to himself, "To use an Unforgivable on you. Or cut your throat and leave you to bleed to death. Or give you to the vampires as a meal, telling them they didn't have to worry about drinking too much."

Hermione could feel her body going numb at his words. How was it possible he could speak about such horrible things with such a calm and silky voice? It only made the words seem more frightening.

She forced herself to ask:"Why d-didn't you?"

"I can torture you, humiliate you, I can enjoy your pain, but I cannot kill you."

Hermione could feel the possessiveness in his tone and it frightened her, but at the same time it gave her a sense of safety. He could not kill her. She meant something to him. She had to. There was something sick and dark and twisted between the two of them, but at least there was something.

"You belong to me and to me only," he hissed at her with such venom she flinched and hugged herself.

"That filthy vampire will be punished severely for touching my possession."

Hermione's eyes shot up at him at that and what she saw on his face scared her. He was furious. His expression was the same, but his eyes were practically screaming. She couldn't understand why would he act that way. She had only been bitten. Why was he making such a big deal out of it?

"What would you do if I asked you to let me go back home?" she asked carefully, almost not wanting to hear his answer.

His face hardened and after a few moments he spoke, "You will never leave. You had your chance and you decided to return. Live with the consequences."

It surprised her that his words did not shock her as she had expected. Lucius was telling her that she would never again leave and she was not afraid. Strange feeling of calmness took over her as she gave into the destiny. Now her goal to...destroy him was even more clear to her.

"So what now? You keep me here in your house? As your slave? Like before?" she asked, her voice stronger, "You know it won't be that easy, because things have changed."

"Nothing has changed."

He was lying to himself. Hermione wanted to tell him so many things, but she was afraid of his reaction. She wanted to remind him of the reason why he chose her as his reword in the first place. Draco. Hermione was the one who was blamed and punished for his death. But with each passing week that was becoming less and less important and other things started to take over. Things neither of them could explain.

"Fine," she replied calmly. It would do her no good to argue with him. If he did not want to see how things have changed, she could not force him.

Lucius let out a tired sigh, "We can continue our conversation another time. You have tired me out."

Hermione could not help but think he might be tired from last night's activities. She hated that little voice in her head, taunting her, forcing her to remember things she did not want to remember.

Lucius started to walk away and Hermione stopped him before he could reach the doors.

"What am I supposed to do all day? Simply stay in my room?" she wanted to know.

Lucius raised his eyebrows and looked at her innocently,"Perhaps you could put yourself to use, cleaning the house and helping the elves? I have lost one because of your precious Potter, you might be a good replacement."

Hermione shot him a glare, but said nothing. Lucius simply smirked at her and then left the room, this time locking it behind himself. He probably thought she was too weak to move to lock her in a room a day before.

Hermione sighed in annoyance as she thought over their conversation. She needed to get close to him, but how to do that if she was disgusted by his touch? He obviously did not need her. If she could not please him physical, perhaps there was another way. Mentally? Could she offer him emotional support? But Lucius Malfoy did not need emotional support. One would first had to have feelings and Lucius...

_He has feelings. I've seen it._

Hermione was so tired of thinking about him. Lucius Malfoy was the most complicated person she knew. Even more complicated than the most complex potion. And she had to figure him out.

ooo

Hermione did not know what to do with herself. The day was passing unbelievably slowly. There was nothing in the room. Nothing she could distract herself with. No book, nothing! All she could do was stare through the window and think. It was easier when she was in Lucius' bedroom. That way she knew he had to come to the room at one point. But now she had her own room and it was not necessary for him to visit her. Ever.

She could not understand why that thought frightened her so much.

As she made her way to the bathroom, she passed the dressing table and caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror. She stood there for a few long minutes, simply staring at herself. Staring at her stomach. Was she imagining it or was there a slight bump? Was it starting to show? Sheer panic shot through Hermione at the mere thought of it. It was too soon. She had to be imagining it.

_Calm down, Hermione. It's all in your head._

ooo

Hermione had no trouble falling asleep that night and she was grateful for that. The whole day was spent thinking and she truly did not want the night to be the same.

But something interrupted her sleep. Hermione's eyes flew open as she felt someone beside her. Before she could react, that someone was on her and she screamed, panicking.

_"Shh, Mudblood."_

Hermione closed her mouth as she recognized Lucius' voice. After blinking a few times, she was able to see him through the dark. It felt so familiar to feel him so close to her, to feel his weight on her. She calmed down a bit, but she was still nervous about what he was doing.

"I tried to ignore it, but I simply cannot get over the fact that someone else marked you," he spoke with anger in his voice as he leaned down to her, his face only inches away from her.

"Lucius, listen to yourself," Hermione tried, "I'm not marked by him. I'm not marked by _anyone_!"

He simply chuckled at that and replied, "Foolish girl."

Hermione could feel his breath on her neck and it caused her temperature to rise. It was unbelievable what kind of effect he had on her.

Hermione was completely without words and when his lips gently touched the place where she was bitten, a quiet moan escaped her. He did not react and she only hoped he did not hear it. Her nerves were on fire, her body was trembling slightly. What was wrong with her?

Lucius' hand slowly made it's way up her thigh, over her stomach and then Hermione tensed, reality coming back to her. She struggled underneath him, trying to push him away, but he was too strong.

"What is wrong now, Mudblood?" he asked, annoyed, still not moving away from her, "It was _you_ who came back to _me_. It was you who asked for my help, offering me _anything_ in return."

"Get of off me!" she demanded, her voice shaking, "I don't want you..."

His breathing accelerated and that was a sign he was angry, "I will not have my possession wearing a mark of another man."

Hermione could not calm herself, all she wanted was for him to move away from her. She did not want him touching her. Just the previous night his hands were on the other woman. Hermione felt sick.

"Get away from me, get away," she repeated over and over again, the emotions inside of her threatening to explode. Anger, disgust, fear, lust. And hormones were not helping.

"You are still mine!" Lucius hissed at her, tightening his grip on her arm.

"No!" Hermione screamed and bucked against him.

And then something happened. Hermione could not explain why or how. All she knew was that Lucius was suddenly pushed off of her by some invisible force and it seemed to be coming from her. Some kind of energy. Like _magic_.

Hermione could not believe it. It had been so long since she felt magic inside of her. How was it possible?

The lights were suddenly on and Hermione could see Lucius' shocked face as he pulled himself from the floor and simply stood there, staring at her, his eyes not moving from her. She was positive the expression on her face was exactly the same as his was. She did not know what happened and how. But Lucius was going to demand answers and by the look in his eyes, he was decided to get them. No more lies. No more secrets.

**A/N: Finally! So sorry for not updating in two months! Life got in the way. :( But I will try to update sooner next time. Hope you like where this story is going. :) A big Thank you for all those who read and review. You guys are awesome! :)**


	8. Deserve the pain

chapter 8 **DESERVE THE PAIN**

Silence.  
>The time had stopped. Neither of them moved for what it seemed like forever. Hermione had to blink a few times to get used to the strong light in the room. She was without words. What had just happened? Looking up at Lucius, she noticed how shocked he was and it only made her feel more horrible. What could she possibly say to him?<br>Lucius was the first to snap out from the shock, slowly making his way towards the bed, eyeing Hermione as he did so.  
>Hermione was shaking uncontrollably, looking away from him. It felt as if he was suffocating her with his stare.<br>It was gone. Whatever exploded inside of her and caused Lucius to fly across the room, was gone now. And it left her completely helpless and alone with Lucius.  
>Hermione had trouble breathing, it felt as if there was no air in the room, many questions flying inside her head, making it impossible to think straight.<br>"Mudblood," Lucius finally started, his tone low, "I will ask you a question and I expect a truthful answer or else the consequences for you will be severe."  
>Hermione froze with fear, her heart beating like crazy. Lucius could probably hear it too. What could she say to him? What did he want to know?<br>She looked into his eyes and what she saw there terrified her. There was such coldness and...rage. Even though his face seemed perfectly impassive. Hermione's breath caught in her throat as she realized something. Was it possible that he figured it out? Did he know about her...condition? She held her breath in anticipation as she waited for him to speak.  
>"How long have you been practicing wandless magic?"<br>That question caught her completely off guard. Her mouth flew open, but there was no voice, no words, nothing. Could it be that? Was it wandless magic?  
>"I-I-" she stammered, trying to catch her breath.<br>It was not possible. The magic that sent Lucius flying across the room did not belong to her. It did not feel like her magic. It was someone else's.  
>Oh god.<br>"Answer me, Mudblood."  
>She looked up at him, shaking her head,"I-I haven't been practicing wandless m-magic."<br>He only raised his eyebrow at her answer and waited.  
>Hermione could see it on his face that he did not believe her. She made a move to get out of the bed, not able to sit still for a second anymore.<br>"Sit down," Lucius ordered, "You are not moving from the bed until you explain yourself."  
>"I don't know what happened!" Hermione raised her voice, the nerves getting the better of her.<br>"Is that so?" he asked innocently,"You threw me across the room and you don't know how that happened?"  
>"I don't," was her only response as she hugged herself with her arms, trying desperately to calm down.<br>"Well, I am not going anywhere until I get answers from you," he said cruelly,"And if that means resorting to torture methods, then so be it."  
>Hermione's eyes shot up at him,"I told you I don't know what happened!"<br>"What is your secret? Why did you come back?" he demanded, looking directly into her eyes.  
>"You know why," she tried to keep her voice calm, even though she was breaking down on the inside.<br>He simply stared at her and just when Hermione thought she could not stand his intense look anymore, he spoke,"I don't believe you."  
>Hermione's breath caught in her throat as she struggled to keep an emotionless face. He must not see how afraid she was of him finding out about why she had returned.<br>"I believe," he said slowly, walking towards the bed snake-like,"that you are hiding something from me."  
>Hermione was afraid her heart would explode at that very moment. She had to do something and she had to act quickly.<br>"Believe what you want!" she snapped at him, getting out of the bed and walking away from him.  
>He turned to face her again,"Do not push me, Mudblood."<br>"I have told you I don't know what happened! Maybe it was wandless magic, perhaps all the fear and the shock of what you tried to do exploded inside of me!"  
>"Oh please-"<br>She cut him off,"Perhaps it only happened due to you trying to rape me!"  
>His face hardened at that accusation and he approached her slowly, never taking his eyes off of her.<br>"What did you expect by coming back into my Manor?" he asked venomly,"Nothing has changed, Mudblood. You are still my property."  
>Hermione could not believe what she was hearing. He had not changed a bit. He was still the sadistic bastard he was.<br>"And if I remember correctly, Mudblood, being in my bed did not bother you a few months ago."  
>She blushed in embarrassment, but kept a hard face,"That does not mean I am not allowed to change my mind."<br>Lucius rolled his eyes in annoyance, then raised his voice in anger,"Do not change the subject! Answer my previous question."  
>"I told you already!" she screamed at him.<br>The second the words left her mouth, Lucius pushed her against the wall, his hand around her throat,"Don't you dare use that tone with me, girl," he whispered threatengly.  
>Hermione simply stared at him, waiting until he calmed down. Satisfied with her silence, Lucius let go of her, taking a deep breath,"You claim you do not know what had happened, is that true?"<br>Hermione nodded, alarmed by his sudden calmness. He was planning something, she could just tell.  
>"Alright," he said and smiled. There was something so devilish about his smile that it actually made Hermione's skin crawl.<br>"We will soon see if that is the truth," with those words he walked past her towards the door,"Sleep tight."  
>He left the bedroom, leaving Hermione alone and shaking. She did not move for a couple of minutes, simply thinking about everything that had happened.<br>How could he expect her to...to give in to him again? As if nothing had happened. As is he was not in the arms of another woman just the previous night?  
>She was so disgusted and afraid and angry at him and then there was some kind of energy. From inside her. And it just exploded and the next thing Hermione knew was that Lucius was on the floor. Was it possible that-?<br>Her hand dropped to her belly.  
>It had to be it. There was no other explanation.<br>There was no sleep for her that night.

oooo

The next morning the light was streaming through the window, but Hermione did not react. She did not even notice when the night had gone away. She was been sitting motionless on the bed, thinking. What had she gotten herself into? How could she even think she would be able to trick Lucius and help destroy him when she could not even think straight every time he looked at her with his grey eyes. She was so sick and tired of all the secrets and the pretending.  
>Perhaps the best solution would be to tell him about that little problem she had and he was responsible for. He would no doubt get rid of it and then...then what? What would happen then? Was there a possibility he would let her go again?<br>No.  
>Even if he did, there was no life for her anymore. She had tried to live normal life with her parents, but it did not work out well. She was too scarred to be normal. Lucius was in her thoughts at all time. How did it all happen? If someone had told her a year ago that Lucius Malfoy would be the most important thing in her world, she would laugh at that person.<br>Suddenly there was a small 'pop' sound and Hermione flinched as she turned around, noticing a small elf standing in the middle of the bedroom. It was looking at her with it's big eyes, as if a bit surprised at seeing her again. Hermione tried to remember it's name. It's been a long time since she saw it.  
>"Um," she started slowly, "P-Pippy?"<br>The elf nodded, "Miss, the Master demands your presence in the dining room."  
>Hermione raised her eyebrows in surprise. She was not sure if she heard the elf correctly.<br>"He-"  
>"The Master does not like to be kept waiting. He said five minutes."<br>A chill ran up Hermione's spine as she remembered the last night's events and she was not sure if she wanted to see him again that soon. And what was his plan anyway? Why would he demand her presence in the dining room? Did he expect her to eat with him? Why? It sure as hell was not because of the kindness of his heart.  
>She felt her stomach clench at not knowing what awaited her. But she had to follow his rules. Only that way she could find out what he was up to.<br>"Does he expect me to wear something else or-" she asked, looking down at herself.  
>The elf shook his head, "The Master said nothing about clothes, Miss."<br>"Alright."  
>With a deep breath, she prepared herself and only a few moments later she was being led out of the bedroom.<br>Hermione remembered those hallways very well. She remembered her fight with Phillix and then her fall down the stairs. She could still remember how much it hurt and how her ankle was swollen the next couple of days.  
>The elf led her down the stairs and after one more hallway, they finally reached what seemed to be the dining room. Hermione was not at all surprised by the size of the room. She expected it to be large and elegant and tastefully decorated. Just like Lucius Malfoy himself.<br>Her eyes noticed a long table, big enough to seat at least twenty people, but there was only Lucius sitting at the end of it. He was reading the Daily Prophet and did not even look at her as he ordered the elf to leave.  
>The small creature immediately obeyed and Hermione was again left alone with Lucius. She looked around awkwardly, not knowing what was expected of her.<br>After a few long moments Lucius looked up from his paper, his brows raised, "Do you need a special invitation?"  
>Without answering, Hermione slowly walked closer to the table, noticing the plate was set for her next to Lucius. She slowly sat down, feeling extremely uncomfortable being so close to him again. Not wanting to look at Lucius, she kept her eyes on the table and noticed there was no food yet.<br>God, she was starving.  
>But he did not invite her to the dining room so that she could have a proper meal. It was something else.<br>After a long moment of silence, Lucius finally closed the newspaper and set it on the table.  
>And then he looked at her.<br>"Did you sleep well?"  
>Hermione's head shot up at him, trying to figure him out. What was he playing at? Unfortunately there was nothing on his face that would help her understand him. Even his voice was completely casual and calm.<br>What should her answer be?  
>"I didn't sleep at all," she finally said, truthfully.<p>

Lucius' lip curled up in a smirk as if her answer amused him.  
>"And why is that?" he asked calmly, pretending as if nothing had happened last night.<br>"Please, you know why," she said, then added, "Did you actually expect me to be able to sleep after what happened?"  
>"Actually yes," he replied with false innocence in his voice, "Sleep is our primal and fundamental need."<br>"Are you saying there were never things that kept you awake at night?"  
>Hermione noticed the slight change in Lucius' emotionless expression as he cleared his throat and looked away. That was her answer. He was not completely soulless. There were things that kept him awake at night. He was not without conscience. At least not completely without conscience.<br>Hermione looked down at the table in front of her and waited for his next move. This had to be some kind of a test. He had never before asked her to come into the dining room. She was not worthy of it. What changed?  
>She allowed herself to look at him again and then tensed as he suddenly pulled a wand out of his cane. That wand always caused her pain and she was not glad to see it again. <span>Lucius<span> smirked as he noticed how Hermione visibly stiffened. Fear was not an easy emotion to hide.  
>"What is wrong, Mudblood?" he asked calmly.<br>Hermione forced herself to look away from his wand. At first she set her eyes on the table, then slowly her gaze traveled up until she met his eyes.  
>"What are you planning?" she asked after a few long moments when she found her voice again.<br>"What do you mean?" he asked innocently.  
>"I know you're up to something."<br>The smirk never left his face as he replied,"What gives you that idea? I simply wanted to spend this morning in your company."  
>Hermione took a deep breath and nodded. Fine. She decided to play along. Sooner or later his true motives would show. She was sure of it.<br>With a flick of his wand the food suddenly appeared on the table. Hermione could almost hear her stomach complain at the mere sight of the typical English breakfast. Many typical English breakfasts. There had to be at least five types of breakfasts and Hermione could hardly refrain herself from showing hunger on her face. There was bacon and scrambled eggs, sausage, baked beans, French toast. There were different types of cereals, a pudding, fruit. She noticed a jug with orange juice, then milk and coffee. And she could smell all of it. The delicious smell of food made it's way towards her and it was harder and harder to resist it. Luckily there was no trace of morning sickness and Hermione could finally enjoy a decent meal.  
>But it was too perfect.<br>She bit the inside of the cheek and then looked at Lucius, who was staring at her with amusement.  
>"Something the matter?" he asked, raising his eyebrow.<br>"No, everything's perfect."  
>"Then why aren't you eating? Help yourself, don't be shy."<br>Hermione shook her head, not believing a word he said, "Please, Lucius," she started seriously, "What kind of a game is this?"  
>He looked at her sadly, "Why do you always assume the worst of me?"<br>"Is there a reason I shouldn't?"  
>"I am simply trying to enjoy breakfast with you. Why is that hard to believe?"<br>Hermione remained silent at that. She was sick of his mid games. And he was not even trying to convince her to believe him. It was written all over his face that he was playing with her and she was sick of it.  
>"No," was her reply.<br>"No what?"  
>"I won't eat," it hurt her to say those words, but she had to do it. She was positive her hunger was clearly seen on her, but she was not playing one of his games again.<br>"I don't believe you're not hungry," Lucius said confidently.  
>"I never said I wasn't."<br>"Then what is the problem?"  
>Hermione refused to answer. They were playing the game of cat and mouse. There was no chance of her winning if she decided to play the game. So she simply refused to play it.<br>The next few moments passed in silence and then Lucius finally spoke.  
>"Alright," slight annoyance could be heard in his voice, "Is that your final answer?"<br>"Yes," Hermione replied with a strong voice. She could only hope her face was not betraying any sign of weakness.  
>"You spit on my generosity," he drawled and pointed his wand at her.<br>Hermione tensed but tried to keep a calm face as she waited for the curse to hit her, but there was nothing. No pain. Lucius simply flicked his wand at her and that was it. Hermione eyed him suspiciously as he took a sip of orange juice and decided to ignore her. Letting out a sigh, she she wanted to cross her arms over her chest, but found it impossible to. Surprised, she looked down at herself, but nothing could be seen. She struggled harder, but it was as if invisible ropes were keeping her in place. She could not move her arms, she could not stand up. She was stuck on that chair.  
>"What did you do?" she demanded, sending angry glance at Lucius who was calmly enjoying his breakfast.<br>"What did you expect I would do after you so rudely declined my generous offer?" he asked without even bothering to look at her.  
>"You planned this from the beginning."<br>"Of course not," he finally looked at her, "I actually intended to have a normal breakfast with you."  
>Hermione could laugh out loud at that statement, but she was not in the mood for laughing so she simply rolled her eyes and remained silent.<br>No one spoke for several minutes. Hermione tried to ignore the sight and the smell of food in front of her as Lucius ate in silence, completely ignoring her.  
>It was a torture. Even the Cruciatus Curse would be easier to handle than being hungry, but not able to touch the food in front of you.<br>A thought occurred to Hermione. Perhaps Lucius did not have a secret plan, perhaps he simply wanted to eat with her. But as soon as that sentence formed in her head, she realized how outrageous it sounded. It was impossible. He was doing this on purpose and Hermione wanted to know what his goal was.  
>Finally he seemed to be done.<br>And then he looked at her, a pleased smile on his face, "That was delicious."  
>Hermione was shaking with rage. If only looks could kill.<br>"Well, my dear, I have business I need to attend to," he explained as he got up and walked behind her, placing his hands on her shoulders. Hermione could feel herself tensing at the feel of his hands on her, but tried to ignore it, concentrating on his words.  
>"You will wait for me here."<br>That sentence caught her attention as she turned her head towards him, "What? You can't just leave me here!"  
>"The food will remain here. Eat something, you are too thin for my taste."<br>"But-"  
>"See you in a few hours," with those words he walked away, leaving her completely alone.<br>"Lucius! You can't leave me like this!" she screamed at him, but he was already gone. He was joking, playing with her. He had to be. He would come back after a few minutes and untie her. Hermione was sure of that.  
>She took a deep breath to calm her nerves and then looked at the food. It was unbelievable torture to look at it. A few moments later she decided to close her eyes, maybe it would be easier.<br>It was not.  
>She could still smell the food and that was almost as bad as having to look at it.<br>Her stomach was complaining loudly now, but Hermione was still telling herself that Lucius would come back. He would not leave her like this. All she had to do, was wait a few more minutes.

ooo

A few minutes passed.

A few hours passed.

He did not come back.

And Hermione was still sitting on that chair, not able to move. She could hardly feel her legs anymore. She was numb from sitting in the same position for so many hours.  
>And she was unbelievably hungry.<br>How could he do that to her? Was he that cruel? Did he enjoy seeing her suffer? If he only knew he was not starving simply her, but their... his child as well.  
><em>Oh god.<em>  
>It sounded so wrong. Even in her head. But she could not pretend anymore. She could not ignore it and hope it would go away. She did not want it, but at the same time she could not hate it. It was not the baby's fault that it's father was a cold bastard. And she had to start taking care of herself. It was not just her anymore. Now she was responsible for another being as well. It did not matter if she did not want it, she had to take care of it.<br>She sighed and felt one tear slide down her cheek. She was so tired and emotionally drained.  
>Suddenly a hand brushed her tear away and Hermione flinched away from the touch, turning her head to look at that person. It was him. Of course it was him. Who else would it be.<br>There was something intense in his eyes and he was completely serious as he looked down at her. Hermione was wondering if perhaps he was feeling regret. Was that even possible. Not able to stand their eye contact anymore, she looked down at herself, waiting for him to speak.  
>"You haven't touched the food," he stated calmly.<br>That angered her a bit, "How did you expect me to-"  
>Then she realized it. It all made sense in her head now.<br>"You expected me to use my powers," she accused him, "That was your plan. From the very beginning."  
>He said nothing for a long moment and then he simply nodded.<br>"You are unbelievable," Hermione let out, her voice shaking.  
>"Last night you have performed wandless magic and you will do it again, Mudblood."<br>"I don't know how it happened! I didn't practice it!" she was screaming by now, but she did not care.  
>"Are you saying it was a spontaneous reaction then?" he asked, raising his eyebrow.<br>She didn't know what to say to him, "I-I...probably."  
>He was studying her face for any sign that she was lying to him and after a few moments he nodded, "Alright. I believe you."<br>For some strange reason she was not relieved by that.  
>He flicked his wand at her and the invisible bonds disappeared. Hermione moved her arms and then her legs, realizing she was finally free. Then the uncomfortable silence filled the room.<br>What was she supposed to do now?  
>"Get up," he ordered her and she obeyed, slowly standing up and turning to face him.<br>His eyes roamed up and down her body and then he approached her slowly.  
>"I wonder," he whispered, "If I tried the same thing I tried yesterday, would it have the same results?"<br>Hermione's eyes widened in shock at what he was implying. He could not be even thinking about trying that again. Her fear seemed to turn into some insane sort of courage, "Don't touch me," she hissed at him.

Lucius obviously find her amusing as he smirked at her and then suddenly grabbed her and pulled her against himself. Hermione struggled at the contact, but he was stronger. He always was.  
>"Whatever shall I do to you now?" he was close, too close and she shuddered involuntarily.<br>"Let go of me!" she pushed against his chest, panicking.  
>"Make me," he drawled, "Send me flying across the room."<br>Hermione was shaking with anger and fear and disgust. His hand sneaked behind her and lazily made it's way down her back. And it didn't stop. It went lower and lower until it reached her buttocks. Blushing furiously because her pride was being demolished by the second, she gathered as much courage and put on a strong face. She had to ignore what he was doing. She must not react the way she reacted yesterday. She had to be completely calm. But how when he was touching her in such a manner?  
>He was looking deep into her eyes, reading her like an open book. When he got no reaction from her, he pushed her towards the table and forced her down until she was lying on her back and he was standing between her legs.<br>"Do something, Mudblood," he whispered maliciously, a small sneer on his expression and when she ignored his comment, he gave her a disapproving look for a moment but then turned back to what he was doing,  
>placing his hands on her thighs and playing delicately with the robe that covered her. Hermione concentrated on breathing. In and out. He was simply playing with her. He wasn't going to go through with it. At least she was trying to convince herself that.<br>She couldn't help but cry out when Lucius slowly started pushing the material up, revealing more and more of her thighs. He was doing it unbelievably slowly and Hermione feared her heart would betray her before he actually did something.  
>"Look at me," he ordered and her eyes snapped towards him. He was challenging her, she could clearly see it in his eyes. He wanted her to snap at him, he wanted her to stop him and most importantly he wanted her to use her powers. The powers he thought she had.<br>When she simply stared at him, not doing anything, his eyes went cold and he decided to continue. He leaned down, covering her body with his and roughly pressing his lips against hers. Hermione did not struggle against him anymore. It surprised her how his kiss seemed to cause some kind of a tingling sensation in her belly. Perhaps she liked to be kissed by him. Perhaps he was doing exactly what she wanted deep down inside her.  
>No.<br>She couldn't want _that_. And _him_.  
>She jolted backwards and sideways to escape from him, but it did not do any good and she could do nothing to stop the trembling that has started in her thighs.<br>The moment she felt him release her hands, she searched desperately for anything she could use against him. Lost in the kiss, he seemed oblivious by what she was doing. Finally, her hand landed on something. A jug. Without thinking she grabbed it and hit him over the head with it. The glass broke and orange juice spilled all over them. Lucius cursed and then immediately removed himself from her, his hand resting on the wound on his head. Hermione knew she did not hurt him too serious, she could have hit him harder but didn't. Lucius did not seem to be thankful for that. There was slight pain in his expression, but what frightened Hermione was his anger. His eyes were practically screaming at her. She jumped off the table and took a few steps back.  
>"Y-You wanted me to s-stop you and I did," she said to him, her voice breaking with panic. Her robe was almost completely wet from the juice and so was Lucius hair. Hermione had never before seen him so messed up. And she was the reason for it. She did it.<br>"You despicable creature," he whispered in a deadly tone, staring at her as if he wanted to kill her with his eyes.  
>Hermione looked around, panicking, thinking if there was any way she could run and hide or anything. She could not stay in the same room as Lucius. Not when he was like that.<br>"Y-You made me do it," she defended herself, then realized how stupid she was. Why was she apologizing to him? It should be the other way around. How was it possible he always turned everything around so that she was the one to blame?  
>Without saying anything, he pulled his wand out again, slowly pointing it at her.<br>"Oh god," she whispered, trying not to panic.  
>"How should I punish you?"<br>Her breathing became quick, just like her heart beat and she shut her eyes waiting for the worst.  
>"Answer me, Mudblood," he raised his voice a bit, clearly expecting an answer.<br>Was he serious? He wanted her to suggest a torturing spell he could use on her?  
>"Lucius," she started slowly, "You don't want to do this."<br>"I believe I _do_ want to," was his only reply.  
>He was still not lowering his wand.<br>Hermione was so tired of was tired of always being afraid and worried. If he wanted to use a curse on her, then so be it.  
>Long moment of silence passed and then nothing. No curse. No pain.<br>"Pippy!" he called and Hermione looked at him, noticing that he had put away his wand.  
>The elf appeared immediately and it looked a bit shocked at the sight in the dining room. The table was a mess, there was glass on the floor, both Hermione and Lucius were covered in orange juice.<br>"Take her to her bedroom," Lucius ordered the elf, never taking his eyes off Hermione.  
>That surprised her. Why the sudden change of mind?<br>She opened her mouth to say something, but then decided against it as she noticed how angry he still was. Quickly she passed him and the elf accompanied her to her room.

ooo

She was left alone for the rest of the day and Hermione couldn't be more thankful for that. After everything that happened, the last thing she wanted was to see Lucius Malfoy again.  
>He had put her through hell in the last two days. But she was not allowed to complain about it. She knew well enough what she was getting herself into when she agreed to come back into this world. And if she was completely honest with herself, it was not worst pain she had felt from Lucius. He had hurt her more in the past. Starving she could handle. It was hard and painful and nerves-wracking, but she could handle it. She was positive he would not let her die of starvation. At least she could count on that. He always gave her food before it became too much for her to handle.<br>And she was right. Later that day the elf came to her room, bringing food for her. Hermione could be more glad to see the little creature. She was not sure if she could handle one more day without food.  
>As she enjoyed the meal, she could not help but think about everything that happened. She threw Lucius across the room. Well, it was not her exactly, but in some way it was her. When she was first captured and Lucius spent every minute of the day torturing her, humiliating her, hurting her and when she literally hated him and wished for his death, all she could think about was how good and satisfying it would feel if she could overpower him just one time. She dreamed of the day she could fight him off and see that smirk vanish from his arrogant face. And it finally happened. But Hermione surprisingly did not feel any satisfaction. All she felt was fear. Fear of what he would do if he found out how she was able to do what she did.<br>She could not hide it from him forever. He had to find out sooner or later.  
>Then her thoughts wondered off to the event in the dining room. If she could only read his thoughts. Would he really have done it? Would he have actually be able to go through with it? He was testing her, pushing her to her limits to get a reaction from her. Deep inside of her she somehow felt he would have stopped. There was no valuable reason to believe that, he had not stopped in the past, but something was telling her he would not have hurt her. And why did he not punish her when she hit him with that jug? He wanted to. She could see it in his eyes. He was just a second away from throwing a curse at her, but he stopped. Why?<p>

Realizing she would not get the answers she needed, she decided to go to sleep. It was dark outside. Luckily, she did not have any trouble falling asleep, the result of being up all night a day before.

ooo

_She was screaming. Crying. She cried until her lungs burned and her chest throbbed with pain._  
><em>"I'm going to ask you again! Where did you get this sword? Where?" Bellatrix stood above her, her crazy eyes digging a hole in Hermione.<em>  
><em>Too much pain. She had never in her life felt such pain. She never even knew it was possible to feel it without dying.<em>  
><em>"W-we found it! Please! We found it!" she cried, hoping someone would save her from that lunatic, save her from the pain. But no one did.<em>  
><em>Bellatrix kicked her in the stomach, yelling furiously at her, "You are lying, filthy Mudblood, and I know it!"<em>  
><em>Hermione doubled over, curling into a ball and trying to protect herself from any more kicks. Her breath was coming out in short gasps, it felt as if her lungs were hurting every time she took a breath.<em>  
><em>"You have been inside my vault at Gringotts! Tell the truth, tell the truth!"<em>  
><em>Hermione refused to answer, perhaps it would all go away if she ignored her. Perhaps she could close her eyes and pretend she was somewhere else.<em>  
><em>"Crucio!"<em>  
><em>More pain.<em>  
><em>Scream.<em>  
><em>Knives were stabbing her repeatedly, fire was burning every muscle in her body and it felt like bones were breaking as she twisted on the floor, trying to get away from the horrible pain.<em>  
><em>She was screaming so much it felt like her throat was burning as well. Why was she screaming? Why was she giving Bellatrix the satisfaction? If only she could keep quiet.<em>  
><em>The curse was finally taken off of her and Hermione moaned with pure pain she felt. Her body was still shaking uncontrollably in the<em> _aftershocks and she turned her head away, not wanting to look at the crazy woman who was yelling at her._  
><em>And then she noticed him.<em>  
><em>Lucius Malfoy.<em>  
><em>He was standing in the corner of the room, his eyes never leaving the scene before him. There were no emotions on his face. Nothing. It was completely blank.<em>  
><em>"What else did you take? What else have you got? Tell me the truth or, I swear, I shall run you through with this knife!"<em>  
><em>Hermione blinked the tears away and set her eyes on the man standing away from all that was happening. What kind of a man was he? How could he stare so impassively at the torture that was happening before his eyes? Hermione realized he was not just looking at her, he was looking in her eyes. Why? How could he? Did he not feel shame?<em>  
><em>"Crucio!"<em>  
><em>Again her body twisted unnaturally, absolute agony consumed her as she felt every nerve in her body being mutilated and torn apart.<em>  
><em>This time the curse was lifted after just a few seconds. Hermione lay heaving on the floor, shaking violently, barely able to keep her eyes open, but she could still see the the woman in dark robes above her.<em>  
><em>"What else did you take?"<em>  
><em>Hermione could not speak. Even if she wanted to answer her questions, she was too weak to even form a word.<em>  
><em>"Cruc-"<em>  
><em>"Bella!" a voice came from the corner in the room.<em>  
><em>Such a cold voice.<em>  
><em>"We will not be able to get answers from her if you kill her," he said calmly, not at all affected by what he was saying.<em>  
><em>Hermione could not even turn her head towards him. All she could do was lay there and try to breath. Try to hold on to life.<em>  
><em>"Oh, I won't kill her. That would ruin all the fun!" Bellatrix laughed and pressed a knife to Hermione's throat, "We have just started."<em>

Hermione jerked awake, pressing her hand to her throat, checking for any kind of wound. Only after a few moments she realized it was only a dream. A nightmare.  
>Breath. It's over now.<br>But she could still remember the pain. It felt so real.  
>Taking a deep breath, she looked at the window. It was morning already. There was no more sleep for her, she could not risk having that nightmare again.<br>Brushing the hair from her face, she realized she was covered in cold sweat and the robe was sticking to her body uncomfortably. Pulling herself out of the bed, she decided to take a morning bath. Perhaps that would help her nerves.

ooo

Hermione walked out of the bathroom, feeling much calmer and cleaner. It was unbelievable what kind of an affect a simple bath could have. She was wearing her old robe. It was dirty, but it was the only one she had. As she walked past the dressing table, she caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror. Not able to resist, she slowly walked back and stepped in front of it, taking a deep breath and looking at herself. There was no time for running away from the truth anymore. She had to face what was happening. She was a strong girl after all. She could handle it.  
>First her hand touched her neck as she noticed a small scar there. It was where that vampire had bitten her. It was a small scar, she had expected it to be much larger and more disgusting. Another scar to add to the collection. But it was weird, because that was a first scar that was not caused by Lucius.<br>She looked at her wrists and there were still reminders of her first day at the Manor. When he had slashed her wrists because she would not call herself a Mudblood. Those times seemed so long ago, when in fact it had only been a few months.  
>He had left so much scars on her. On her body and on her mind. Some faded away and some would never.<br>And that was not the only thing he left on her. In her. Taking a shaky breath, she slowly touched her belly, wondering if it showed already. She could not see any change, but perhaps someone else might.  
>"When you are done examining yourself in the mirror-" a voice from the other end of the room came and Hermione let out a scream as she turned around, almost knocking the chair to floor in the process.<br>"-we could have a talk," he finished, his brow furrowed. He was obviously not expecting that big of a reaction.  
>"Y-You scared me," Hermione forced the words out, her hand on her chest in a case her heart decided to jump out.<br>"I noticed that," he replied quietly, his eyes roaming over her body as if he was looking for something.  
>Hermione wanted desperately to get his attention so he would stop observing her like that, "How long have you been here?"<br>"A few minutes."  
>"W-Why?"<br>This time he looked up at her, his face normal again. He seemed to have brushed away any suspicions he had about her reaction.  
>"Do you want to know what I have been thinking?" he asked eventually, his voice back to a drawl.<br>The pressure in her chest lessened a tad more and panic seemed to leave her body slowly as he changed the subject. She sucked in air as best she could for a few seconds and then nodded.

Lucius continued, "I can imagine how boring it can be to be locked up in a bedroom all day long."  
>Hermione tensed, preparing herself from what was to come. Whatever he had come up with, it could not be good.<br>"So," he smirked at her, "I found a way you could entertain yourself."  
>Hermione raised her eyebrow, waiting for him to continue.<br>"From now on you will be helping Pippy clean the house."  
>"W-What?"<br>He was smirking, pleased, "I do not like to repeat myself. You heard me the first time, Mudblood."  
>That was unexpected. He wanted her to help clean the house? That was all? She let out a quiet sigh of relief.<br>"So what do you say," he asked, then added innocently, "Not that your opinion matters in any way."  
>"I'll do it," she answered quietly.<br>"You are not complaining, then?"  
>"Why would I complain?" she demanded of him, drawing another breath.<br>It was perfect. She would be able to walk around the house and actually do something helpful. She could hardly be the spy she was expected to if she was locked in her bedroom all day long.  
>She tried hard not to show excitement and Lucius did not seem to notice anything, so she relaxed.<br>He pulled his wand out and flicked it at her, drying her hair in a second.  
>"Your working day starts now."<p>

ooo

He wanted to humiliate her. Nothing else.  
>Hermione clenched her teeth in anger as she scrubbed hard at the filthy ground with the ragged old cloth he had given her. She was to scrub the floor in the dining room, although the floor was already completely clean. She felt like an idiot, cleaning something that was already clean. But at least she had something to do. It would be much worse to spend all her day in the bedroom. Her back ached like mad, but she tried to ignore it.<br>What bothered her the most was the fact that she had to scrub the floor in the dining room. From all the rooms that were in the Manor, he chose exactly that room. The room she never wanted to visit again. It was all a part of his manipulation. And Hermione was determined not to show him she was affected by anything he did.  
>Taking a pause, she looked down at her puckered fingers, grimacing. She hated it when that happened.<br>"-could see each other tomorrow-"  
>"-see what I can do-"<br>Hermione stopped moving and held her breath as she listened to the voices.  
>One was Lucius' that she was sure of. But the other one...whose was it?<br>"-perhaps at my house-"  
>Female voice.<br>It had to be that woman. The one she saw Lucius with a couple of night ago. At that realization, Hermione felt a bit woozy and more than a little nauseous. Why was it having such an effect on her?  
>Clearing her throat, she tried to ignore the voices and she scrubbed the floor harder, almost breaking her nails in the process.<br>"-it was nice-"  
>Against her will, Hermione struggled to hear their words. It would do her no good, but she simply could not stop listening to them.<br>_Laugh._  
><em>Soft feminine laugh.<em>  
>Hermione felt the pit of her stomach drop sharply. He had made her laugh. That bothered her more than it should. And then it seemed as if her body got a will of it's own. She got up and slowly followed the voices. The closer she got, the more she could hear what they were talking about.<br>"-a dinner?"  
>"I couldn't agree more."<br>Hermione quickened her pace, anger taking over her.  
>Then she saw them.<br>They were both standing in the hallway that was leading to the entrance of the Manor, still talking. They were standing close, too close. And neither seemed to have noticed her. The woman was beautiful. Her blond hair was long and shiny and her robes seemed elegant and expensive. She had to be around thirty years old or less. Perfect for Lucius.

A violent tremor traveled through Hermione's body and she let go of the wet cloth she had been holding in her hands. It hit the floor loudly and the noise seemed to have alarmed the pair in front of her. They both turned to look at her.  
>The woman seemed surprised to see her, she raised her eyebrows in confusion and then looked back at Lucius in search for an explanation.<br>Lucius on the other hand seemed annoyed, mostly.  
>Hermione met his eyes angrily, and to her fury tears started leaking from the corners of her eyes. She was pathetic.<br>"What are you doing here, Mudblood?" he hissed at her, his glare cold and angry.  
>She said nothing. All she could do was stare at him. What could she say? There was nothing to be said. She was acting foolishly, expecting and hoping that perhaps he would... Hermione did not even finish that thought. It was pointless now.<br>"Lucius , who is this girl?" the woman asked softly.  
>Hermione could feel something break inside of her at the sound of her voice. It was so soft and silky and feminine.<br>"She is no one," Lucius answered without taking his eyes off of Hermione.  
>"But-" the woman started again.<br>He cut her off, "Just a slave of mine. She does not matter."  
>"Oh," was all the woman said and then she looked at Hermione, a slight trace of arrogance in her eyes.<br>She was so beautiful and elegant and sophisticated.  
>Hermione felt so small and ugly compared to her. She could imagine how she looked at that moment. In a dirty robe, her hair a mess. What was she thinking by coming to them, anyway? She could have simply stayed in the dining room and saved herself this humiliation.<br>"Come, Patricia, I'll walk you out," Lucius said in a soft voice, then he looked at Hermione again, "You wait here. We will discuss your behavior."  
>It was interesting how he seemed to change the tone of his voice so effortlessly. One moment he was seductive and soft and the next there was that cruel and cold voice again. And he used it specially for her.<br>Hermione looked away as Luciusand Patricia walked away, leaving her alone in the large hallway. She leaned against the wall, taking a deep breath and wiping the tears away from her eyes. She deserved to be this hurt. It was a punishment for not seeing the things exactly as they were. She deserved the pain.

**A/N: Finally an update! After two months! Sorry! I promise to update sooner next time. :) So, what do you think of this chapter? Where would you like this story to go? I love your reviews! Thank you, guys! :)**


	9. Obstacle

**Chapter 9 OBSTACLE**

_Pull yourself together, Hermione._

Trying to push those horrible images and thoughts out of her head, she managed to put on a strong face just in time before Lucius returned. He slowly walked over to her, crossing his arms over his chest and letting out a sigh. He said nothing to her for a few long moments and it felt like forever to Hermione.

She did not look at him. Why was she even standing there? Waiting for what exactly? An apology, an explanation? He would never give it to her. And he was right. Who was she to demand anything from him? She had no right.

Her mind knew that very well. It was logical and perfectly understandable. But then why was it so hard to accept? Why did she care so much?

Gritting her teeth together, she picked up the cloth and awkwardly looked at Lucius,"I-I'll just go back to-" she didn't finish the sentence and tried to walk away when his voice stopped her.

„You are not going anywhere yet, Mudblood," he replied calmly.

Their eyes met and Hermione nodded, waiting for him to continue.

„Do you remember what I said your job includes?" he asked, raising his eyebrow,"You should remember, it was only this morning."

„I do," Hermione answered slowly,"Cleaning the house, helping the house elf."

„Exactly," he said,"And I don't think that included snooping around the house and interrupting my private conversations."

Hermione remained silent at that, biting her tongue in slight anger.

„Why did you feel the need to come here?" he asked slowly,"Perhaps you needed something?"

„No," she shook her head.

„Then what?" his voice grew impatient.

Should she tell him? Should she tell him how angry she was, how it bothered her that he was messing around with other women? He would probably laugh at her and the last thing Hermione needed at that moment was more humiliation.

„Who is she?" she asked before she could stop herself.

Silence.

Looking up, she was met with a completely impassive face of Lucius Malfoy. There was absolutely no emotion there, nothing. It angered her that she could not read his mind the way he read hers.

Finally he answered,"Why does it matter to you?"

That caught her off guard.

„It doesn't matter to me," she answered, a bit too quickly.

„Then why do you ask?"

„Because I want to know."

That caught his attention and he slowly approached her, a slight amusement on his face.

„My my, is that jealousy, my dear Mudblood?"

„Curiosity," she somehow managed to say that with a calm voice. Surprisingly, she still had some self control left.

„You know," he started,"I don't really believe that."

„Believe what you want," Hermione shot back,"I could just go back to-"

Before she could turn around, Lucius grabbed her by her arm,"I said, you are not going anywhere until I say so."

Hermione clenched her fists in anger, but remained silent.

You can do this. Just listen to what he has to say and don't react.

He let go of her arm and smirked,"I can completely understand why you would feel intimidated by Patricia."

Patricia.

It hurt hearing him say her name in such a tone. He respected her. Thought highly of her.

He never called Hermione by her name.

When she said nothing, he continued,"She is a Pureblood."

„I thought as much," the sentence escaped her mouth.

„She is educated, smart and beautiful."

Every word hurt like a slap.

_Educated._

_Smart._

_Beautiful._

Hermione bit the inside of her cheek, trying to keep a strong face. Somehow she knew it wasn't working and she was not fooling him. He could clearly see what kind of an effect it had on her.

„Did I struck a nerve, Mudblood?"

She shook her head, not saying anything, afraid that if she spoke her voice would betray her.

Not satisfied with her reaction, he pushed on,"I can actually have a conversation with her. A conversation that is not one-sided. I hate it when that happens."

„Great," was all Hermione could say.

„And her beauty, her body, every man's dream," he whispered, his voice like a knife in her stomach.

„I would imagine," Hermione replied, surprised by her own strength.

„And the best part is that she knows what to do in bed," he smirked,"She's not some shy little girl who simply lays there and leaves it up to me to do all the work."

„Sounds like a dream woman," she forced the voice out,"Are you sure you are good enough for her?"

He was taken aback a bit by her response, but he composed himself:"What do you mean by that, Mudblood?"

„I mean you," she started, anger taking over her,"You think you are so perfect. But you're nothing, Lucius. You don't know what it's like to love and care about someone. You are not capable of feeling that. And I feel sorry for you."

Trace of anger flashed on his face, but he hid it immediately, replacing it with a malicious grin,"Are you implying you do know the meaning of love?"

Hermione remained silent.

He let out a short laugh,"What was his name? Some Weasley?"

„Don't talk about him," she said in a low voice.

„Let me tell you something, Mudblood," his face turned serious,"Love is not holding hands and throwing each other puppy dog glances."

„Stop it."

„If there even exists such thing as love, it's dark and twisted. It's something deep inside of you. And it's much more than just holding hands."

„You're wrong."

„Such a shame that boy died without having experienced it."

Hermione clenched the cloth in her hand, resisting the strong urge to throw it at Lucius's smirking face. It would give her satisfaction for a while, but she could not even imagine the consequences. He had let that incident with the broken jar pass, but she sure as hell would not it pass if she decided to throw the wet and dirty cloth at him.

Biting hard on her tongue, she remained silent and Lucius was obviously pleased by her behavior.

„You can return to work now," he dismissed her and walked away.

She scoffed and wiped her eyes, glaring at his back until he disappeared from the sight.

ooo

No matter how hard she tried, Hermione could not stop thinking about that woman.

_Patricia._

And it annoyed her so much. As she scrubbed the floor harder, she remembered the words Lucius used to describe her.

_Smart._

_Educated._

_Beautiful._

What hurt the most, were the first two words. Hermione never thought of herself as beautiful. She was normal. Of course there were some things she would like to change on herself, but she never paid that much attention to her looks. The only moment she really felt beautiful was at Yule ball. Otherwise she did not really see herself as a pretty person. And that was why Lucius telling her she wasn't beautiful, did not bother her so much. But what really hurt was when he implied she was not smart and educated.

If there was one thing Hermione was sure about was that she was smart. She _was_ educated. She did not get the title of _The brightest witch of her age_ because of her looks.

_Obviously,_ a small, Lucius-like voice said in her head.

She could argue with him. She was smart. She was perfectly able of having an intelligent conversation. If Lucius gave her the chance, she might surprise him. She was positive she was much more intelligent than that Patricia.

Again, she was comparing herself to that woman! She had to stop.

It was only a loss of time.

ooo

The time passed quickly.

Hermione forced herself to think of small, unimportant things as she cleaned the floor. Her arms were hurting and her back was killing her from being in such an uncomfortable situation for the last few hours. Just as she finally finished and wanted to take a break for a few minutes, she heard steps. Not even a minute later, Lucius appeared, barely throwing a glance at her before examining the work she had done.

After a few minutes, he simply nodded,"Acceptable."

Hermione rolled her eyes and stood up.

"At least there is something you are good at," he added, "Come, I will escort you to your room."

She obeyed without words. She was so tired and couldn't wait to go to bed. As they silently made their way upstairs, they reached the long hallway, leading to Hermione's room. Too tired to pay attention to their surroundings, it caught her by surprise when Lucius suddenly walked over to some room and closed the doors loudly.

"Idiotic elf, I have ordered numerous times to close the doors to this room," he barked, anger in his tone.

"Whose room is it?" Hermione asked quietly, surprised by his reaction to open doors.

There was a moment of silence and it seemed as if he was deciding whether or not to tell her. Then he sighed and finally spoke,"It was Draco's."

Hermione could hear the grief and sadness in Lucius' voice even though he tried to hide it behind coldness in his tone. For a moment she felt pity for him. He was probably keeping the room exactly the way it was. As if Draco might return someday. She couldn't even imagine how that felt.

"And I only told you this, so that you know never to set a foot in it. Never," there was an obvious threat in his words, "If I ever found out you were in that room, you will wish you've never been born. Understood?"

Hermione nodded without thinking. He was completely serious. She would not dare to mess with anything that belonged to Draco. Lucius would end her life in a second, she was sure of that.

Nothing else was said as he walked her to her room. The moment she stepped in it, the doors closed and immediately locked.

Hermione sighed as she realized there would be no more walking around the house. He remembered to lock her this time. As she yawned, something caught her attention.

"It's not possible," she muttered under her breath as she approached the window, a smile slowly forming on her face.

It was snowing. Everything was covered with snow and with the gorgeous full moon illuminating the sky, it seemed magical. Hermione got the warm feeling she always had when she was little, anxiety to go out and play in the snow, to open presents and decorate a Christmas tree. A smile played across her face for a few seconds before it all vanished. She was not a child anymore and she was not at home or at Hogwarts.

Walking away from the window, she decided to take a quick bath. She grabbed a towel and made her way into the bathroom.

ooo

The bath was not as relaxing as it used to be. Horrible thoughts simply would not leave her alone, no matter how hard she tried to push them away and think about something else.

_Patricia._

_No, I will not think about that anymore. It's snowing. It's weird because it's only the beginning of November and..._

_She looked down at me. As if I was not worth of the air I breath._

_Stop it, Hermione!_

Suddenly the doors flew open and there was Lucius standing at the doorway, looking completely furious. Hermione shrieked, her heart almost jumping out of her ribcage. What was he doing? Why was he so angry? Then she remembered she was in the tub and quickly looked down, covering herself with her hands. Thankfully there were enough bubbles to hide some parts of her.

"What are you doing?" she demanded angrily.

He was silent for a few long moments which only made the whole situation worse. He was obviously angry at her. But why? What could he have found out about her? Something didn't feel right in the air. She couldn't explain exactly what she felt, but there seemed to be a cloud around him, a cloud that was dark and consuming him like a black hole.

"I was in my study room, enjoying a glass of Fire whiskey and talking to my wife," he spoke in a low voice.

Hermione felt her blood run cold.

"And I heard an interesting thing," he approached the tub slowly, "It appears that my wife had seen you. Spoke to you even."

She had trouble breathing. Panic was literally suffocating her. He was close to her and all she wanted was to hide. Hide under the water, anything, just to get away.

"Do you have any idea how that is possible?" he asked calmly, even though his eyes were almost black.

"L-Lucius," Hermione started, feeling her throat close up. there were no words coming out.

"Answer my question," he demanded.

Hermione's heart raced as she bit her lip while staring longingly into his perfect face. His features stony and pale, a contrast to her.

"I-I was..." she could not end the sentence. What could she say to him? There was absolutely no good reason why she would be in his study room. There was no story he would believe. And she couldn't tell him the truth. So she remained silent.

"Damn it!" he snapped, "Are you mute?"

Hermione flinched at that, but still she said nothing.

Suddenly he grabbed her arm and pulled her up and out of the bathtub. Hermione cried out in pain and shock and then he released her, still glaring at her furiously. She quickly wrapped a tower around her shivering body and forced herself to look into his eyes.

"Well?" he raised his eyebrows at her.

She was near hysterics now. She fell onto her knees on the floor in front of him, shaking from head to toe. Whether it was from fear or cold, she did not know. Nor care.

"You were snooping around," he said instead of her.

Hermione nodded, looking up at him, "What d-did you expect?"

His face went even paler at that and Hermione knew she had angered him even more.

"I expected you to obey! And that did not include snooping around, walking into rooms you have no right to be in!" he was almost yelling at her and it sent shivers down Hermione's body.

What should she do or say to save herself? Should she apologize? Should she remain silent and simply wait for his anger to pass? She heard him inhale deeply and let it out slowly.

"Get up, Mudblood."

Hermione obeyed, somehow pulling herself up from the floor, but then when she looked at Lucius' face, everything seemed to slowly turn into darkness. She blinked a few times to clear her sight, but it didn't help. She almost lost her balance, but she grabbed the bathtub for support. He was talking, words were coming out of his mouth, but Hermione could not hear anything. Then her body started to feel weightless and then suddenly everything turned black.

ooo

Hermione awoke slowly, feeling as though she had been in a dark place. There were no dreams, no thoughts, nothing. She took a deep breath and opened her eyes slowly, noticing Lucius sitting on the chair next to her bed. It did not surprise her anymore. She blinked a few times and cleared her throat before speaking, "What happened?"

Her voice seemed normal, a bit sleepy, but nothing serious. And the rest of her body seemed to be alright. She was not hurt or anything like that.

"You fainted last night."

"Last night?" she asked, surprised.

Then she looked at the window and noticed it was already a new day. It all happened so fast. One minute she was talking to Lucius in the bathroom and now she was in the bed.

"Yes," he answered coldly, "I presume the starvation, the blood loss due to the vampire attack and the stress are responsible for it."

Hermione nodded. He was perhaps right. It could be that. Or it could be something else.

"You will be alright," he said, then changed the subject, "If I return to last night and our conversation-"

"Lucius, please, I-"

"Hold that tongue and let me finish," he cut her off, "As I am a merciful man, I will let your disobedience pass. But only this time, Mudblood."

Hermione felt relief wash over her and she nodded immediately.

"If you do such a thing ever again, you better end your own life, before I get to you, because that will be far more lenient then what I will give you."

He meant that. She could see it in his eyes. She would have to be far more careful. One more mistake and it would be her last.

He stood up.

"Pippy will bring you food. Eat. Today you will be cleaning the floors in the hallway," he informed her.

Hermione tried to hide the annoyance on her face. She did not mind cleaning, but it bothered her how he acted like her Master and how he was ordering her around. But a small voice in her head was telling her she should be grateful she was even alive. He could have punished her severely after finding out what she had done. But he let that pass. Why?

He made his way to the doors, then stopped and turned to look at her. And the look he gave her...it was something in it. Simply the way in which he looked at her. It made her think that perhaps he knew. But he couldn't, could he? He opened his mouth to say something, but then decided against it and simply walked out of the room. Hermione was left speechless for a few minutes. There was that strange feeling inside of her. Nervous feeling accompanied by fear. He could not know. If he knew, he would have said something. Why would he pretend he didn't know?

She calmed down a bit. If Lucius did know, there would be hell to pay.

ooo

Hermione did not see Lucius again that day. She spent most of it scrubbing the floor in the hallway, where nobody bothered her. She knew she should be doing something useful, like trying to find some information the Resistance could make use of, but she did not dare to move away from the spot she was cleaning. Lucius had made it very clear that she would be dead if he caught her snooping around the house again. She knew spying was dangerous but she did not want to end up dead. In that case she would truly be useless.

Just as she was about to take a break, she heard steps. Turning around, she expected to see Lucius, but instead there was Snape. He casually walked by her and stopped by the stairs, looking around.

Hermione was silent, not knowing if she was allowed to speak to him.

"Have you made progress?" he suddenly asked, his tone low.

"N-No, nothing yet," she answered quietly, looking up at him, "I'm sorry, I'm not allowed out of my bedroom."

"Don't look at me," he ordered and Hermione immediately lowered her head, looking down at the floor.

He continued in a quiet voice, "Did something happen?"

"He knows I was in his study room. There was a portrait of his wife and she told him I was there-"

"The bruise on your arm?" he asked, not even looking at her.

Hermione's eyes snapped to her right upper arm. There was a large purple hand print shaped bruise. She hadn't noticed it before.

"From yesterday. It was simply a fight, nothing serious."

Snape nodded, "Soon we will need help from you."

"What kind of help?"

"Distraction," he simply answered, "Everything will be explained in time. I have to go. I'm meeting Lucius in his study."

With those words he walked away and disappeared. Hermione was left anxious, thinking about what kind of help will they need from her. What if she would not be able to help them? What if she was not capable of doing what will be expected from her?

_Stop it, Hermione. You can do it._

With a deep breath she returned to her work.

ooo

"Master says you is done for today. I am walking you to your room," the small elf said to her.

Hermione nodded gratefully, she was really tired and sick of the cleaning. Pulling herself up from the floor, she followed the small creature down the hallway and just as they were about to reach the stairs, she heard a voice.

"Wait!"

Female voice.

Turning around, she was met with that woman. Patricia.

Hermione nearly ran up the stairs and out of her sight, but she somehow forced herself to stay still, looking the woman deep into her eyes. She was dressed elegantly and Hermione noticed just how beautiful she really was.

"Miss, the Master says-" the elf started, but Patricia silenced him with a raise of her hand.

"I am sure he will not mind," she spoke, her eyes not leaving Hermione's.

"Do you want to talk to me?" Hermione managed to ask without her voice breaking.

"Yes," the woman smiled, but it was an empty smile. Such a Lucius used many times.

"Well?"

"I wanted to tell you that I know who you are, girl," she said.

Hermione narrowed her eyes in confusion, but said nothing.

"Hermione Granger, Harry Potter's friend, Lucius Malfoy's mudblood reward."

"You forgot something," Hermione replied calmly.

"Really? And what is that?" the woman asked, raising her eyebrow in interest.

"The brightest witch of her age, the brains of the Golden Trio," she answered, trying hard to keep her face impassive.

She did not know why she even said such a thing. There was simply something inside of her that wanted to contradict that woman standing before her.

Patricia laughed. Even her laugh was so feminine and elegant.

"I apologize," she said, "But I _do_ know a lot of other things about you."

"Really?"

"Yes," she nodded, "Lucius Malfoy and his Mudblood whore. Lucius Malfoy killing his colleagues because of his reward. Lucius Malfoy not attacking the Muggle World because of his Mudblood. I know every rumor about the two of you."

Hermione tried to keep her emotions hidden. She was panicking on the inside, the woman knew too much. And why was she telling her this? What were her motives?

"I like to know my opponents," Patricia said to her, "I have my plans with Lucius and I heard that you could be an obstacle."

"You don't have to worry. Lucius and I-"

"_Lucius_?" she interrupted her, "You call him _Lucius_?"

Hermione mentally slapped herself for making that mistake.

"I am not an obstacle."

"I hope so. Because then you would end up badly and I truly do not want to hurt such a young girl."

Hermione could feel the arrogance coming from that woman and before she could stop herself, she was talking back.

"Don't threaten me," she said confidently, "The only one I'm afraid of is Lucius."

Patricia seemed a bit taken back by Hermione's response, but she quickly composed herself and smiled, "Thank you for telling me that."

Hermione simply glared at her and then turned and then almost ran up the stairs, wanting to be away from that horrible woman and her presence. When she was safe alone in her room, she hugged herself with her arms, desperately needing some kind of a comfort, even if from herself. The mere presence of that woman was horrifying. She seemed polite, she acted polite, her voice was even and calm, but the words were cold, almost evil.

Did she see Hermione as a threat? Was that a reason she threatened her? And if she had plans with Lucius, why would she feel threatened by Hermione? It was not as if Lucius saw her as anything else but a slave to him.

Whatever it was, that Patricia obviously saw her as an obstacle and Hermione needed to be even more careful in the future.

ooo

Nobody bothered Hermione for the rest of the evening. The elf brought her dinner and after that she was left completely alone. She spent most of the time sitting near the window, observing as the snow covered almost everything. It was a remarkable sight.

The night also went by without any important disturbances. She dreamt about being home again. In her bedroom, her bed. And she wasn't alone in the room. There was that shadow in the corner. It was strange how she never felt threatened by it. It could have been anyone, but Hermione never felt afraid of it. Perhaps it was because deep down she thought it was Lucius. Or at least she hoped it was Lucius.

"Miss," the elf appeared early in the morning, "Master says we meet downstairs."

Hermione nodded, following the elf. She was already used to working and cleaning the house. She decided she would play a good girl and obey for a while so Lucius won't be so suspicious of her anymore. She needed to gain back his trust.

Just as she and the elf came down the stairs, she noticed Lucius waiting for her. And there was that woman again. Patricia.

Hermione could feel her blood boil at the sight of her again. Why was she with him every day? And he was not even hiding her anymore. Perhaps he was bragging with her in front of Hermione on purpose. As she walked to Lucius, she tried to keep an impassive face, not even throwing a glance at Patricia who was standing a few feet away.

"I trust you slept well, Mudblood?" he asked, raising his eyebrow.

"I did."

"Good. Today you will be cleaning the library with Pippy. There is too much dust in there," he explained.

Hermione's eyes lighted up, "The library?"

"Yes, but don't get too excited," he warned her, "You are not allowed to read the books. In fact, I advise you to leave the books alone."

"Why?"

He sighed in annoyance, "Is it not a good enough reason that I said so?"

Hermione remained silent.

"There are dangerous books, Mudblood. That is why I am not letting you alone in there."

She narrowed her eyes, "Dangerous?"

"Yes, but not for me. For you."

Silence. Hermione tried to figure out what he meant by it.

Then he spoke again, "I wouldn't want you snooping around again, would I? I would not end good for you."

Hermione looked down in embarassment and nodded, but he caught her chin, forcing her head back so she had to look at him.

Such cold eyes.

The fingers under her chin slowly started drifting down her throat and she had to fight the urge to swallow. Right as he reached her rapidly beating heart, he paused, then slid right to her cleavage before he drew his hand back to himself.

"Understood, Mudblood?" he asked and Hermione quickly nodded, feeling Patricia's eyes burning a hole in her.

"Good," he said, then addressed the elf, "Take her there. I will return in a few hours."

Then he walked to Patricia, whispering something to her. She smiled and nodded, "Of course."

Hermione could not look away from the two of them, then she felt the elf pulling at her robe, "Miss, we has to go."

Before she and the elf disappeared down the long hallway, Hermione could see as Lucius quickly walked upstairs, probably to get something and Patricia was left alone, glaring at Hermione.

ooo

The library was ... There were no words to describe it. There were so many books, so many shelves. There was also a locked book cage and Hermione could not help but wonder what kind of books were there. Probably were dangerous, dark magic, if they had to be locked away like that. Everything was so organized, much better than at Hogwarts. Hermione almost lost herself in the parallel arrangement of bookshelves.

"Miss, here," the elf handed her a feather duster.

Hermione couldn't concentrate on the cleaning, she had to fight the urge to open just one book. It had been so long. But she couldn't. Lucius prohibited it. With a disappointed sigh, she started dusting the shelves.

ooo

A few hours later, perhaps two or three, they were halfway done and the elf suddenly became very nervous.

"Miss, I has to go check how the lunch is going."

Hermione could feel hope form inside of her, but she tried to keep calm.

"I will be gone for five minutes."

That's all I need.

"Miss, promise, you will not touch anything."

"I promise," she was lying, but what damage could it do, right?

The elf looked at her with it's big eyes, then quickly left the library.

A big smile formed on Hermione's lips as she walked over the the closest shelf and took one book out.

"A Guide to Magic Torture," she read and opened the book.

She grimaced as she was met with a horrible picture of a person being bent backwards. She closed the book immediately. That was not the kind of a book she wanted to read. Putting it back, she noticed another.

"A History of Torture, The History of Purebloods, Healing Spells for Dark Curses, The T_orture_ Methods of the Inquisition, The History of Witchcraft, The Power of Blood," Hermione read out loud, not knowing which book to pull out and open.

They were all horrible, she would probably be confronted with disgusting images, but she could not help but think they were all interesting. She would not mind reading them.

Unfortunately, the elf soon returned and Hermione was already dusting the shelves, not drawing any attention to her.

ooo

The evening came and Hermione was again back in her bedroom. Her arms hurt so much. The library was exquisite, but it was too large to clean it up in one day. She and the elf worked hard but they did not finish the job. She would probably have to finish it tomorrow. Even though she was tired, she could not help but feel excited about tomorrow. If she was lucky, the elf would leave her alone again. Even if only for a few minutes.

Just as she was about to go to the bathroom, she heard yelling.

"Mudblood!"

Her blood ran cold. It was him.

She heard angry steps and then the doors flew open. Hermione could not move away from the spot, she was literally frozen.

The look on his face.

He was furious.

And it wasn't the normal fury. There was something else. His eyes were red.

"L-Lucius?" she forced out.

"Why?" was all he asked, his voice cold and shaking.

"What happened?"

"I will ask you this once," he warned, "Why did you do it? Was it a revenge?"

"What are you talking about?"

He was really starting to freak her out. What had happened to make him so angry? What had she done? No matter how hard she tried, she could not seem to find a thing she could have done wrong.

"Was it because of the library?" she asked, "I shouldn't have opened the-"

"Shut your mouth!" he snapped, walking to her and grabbing her arm violently.

Hermione yelped in pain, she was afraid he might break her arm and then he dragged her with him. She resisted, pulling at him, trying to make him stop, but he was not listening to her. The fury had completely taken over him.

"You're hurting me!" she screamed, "Where are you taking me?"

Without answering, he dragged her down the hallway into a room. Hermione recognized the room. It was Draco's. Why was he taking her-?

The question died in her mind as Lucius pushed her forward and she landed on her knees in the middle of the room.

Everything was...ruined. The bed was messed up, the large mirror was broken and there were shards laying everywhere, Draco's clothes were taken out of the closet and thrown around the room.

Hermione could not believe what she was seeing. She could not understand what was happening. It was too much.

Before she could say anything, Lucius slapped her hard across the face, her head turning with the force of it.

"You despicable creature," he spoke in a low, dangerous growl, "You dirty, unworthy, pathetic-"

"Lucius," Hermione started, blinking the tears away, "I-I don't know what happened here. It wasn't m-me."

He simply shook his head, not taking his red eyes off of her.

"Please, believe me," she whispered, her whole body shaking.

In a second he was beside her, pulling her up from the floor, "It wasn't you? Like it wasn't you who was in my study room?" he demanded as she shook her violently.

"It wasn't me," was all Hermione could say, her voice breaking as she burst into crying, "W-Why would I-"

He cut her off as he pushed her to the floor again, "That is what I want to know! Why, Mudblood?"

"I didn't-"

"My son's room! My son's things! My dead son's!" he yelled at her, shaking with absolute fury and grief.

"I would never-" her voice died in her throat as he pulled out his wand.

Oh god.

He was going to kill her. She could see it in her eyes. He was going to kill her and he did not care. Nothing could stop him.

"Lucius," she tried again, "Why would I? Think about it! Please, believe me-"

"Revenge?" he asked, "That is perhaps the only reason you came back, right, Mudblood?"

She shook her head, "No!"

"You wanted to see me suffer. You wanted to hurt me as much as I hurt you," he spoke, never lowering his wand.

"N-No! I would never do this! Not to you, not do Draco!"

Rage flashed in his eyes as he snapped, "Don't speak his name, you filthy Mudblood!"

"Luc-"

"Crucio!"

Hermione's world turned upside down. She let out a blood-curdling scream. She could not breath.

There was only burning pain.

Knives.

Stabbing her.

Slicing her.

Her bones had shattered, breaking into a million pieces inside her.

Her blood was acid, eating her alive.

Her skin was being burnt.

Screams.

It was all Hermione could do.

Her body was twisting unnaturally.

After forever it finally ended.

Hermione crumpled to the ground with a whimper, clutching her throat that hurt from the screaming and filling her lungs with cold air in large gulps. She curled into the fetal position and hot tears streamed down her cheeks. Her whimpering sobs echoed through the room and she could feel Lucius' eyes on her.

Everything hurt.

"P-P-Please," she whispered, her body still shaking with the aftershocks.

"You don't deserve my mercy. You don't deserve anything," she heard him say from above her, "You are the only one responsible for this, Mudblood."

"Y-You can't d-do this to me," she forced out.

This was it. She would tell him.

No more secrets. No more hiding.

The truth.

"And why is that?" he asked calmly, "Why shouldn't I torture you until you die? Why shouldn't I kick you? Why shouldn't I kill you right this moment?"

Hermione opened her mouth to speak, but speaking hurt. Everything hurt. She blinked a few times to clear her vision.

Lucius waited a few seconds, then kneeled down at her shivering body, "Pathetic. I should have ended you a long time ago. It would be better for both of us."

"L-Lucius," Hermione whispered, "I-I-"

"You what?" he asked, "What do you have to tell me before I end your pathetic life?"

There was such venom in his voice.

"T-There is s-something," she said quietly, "I'm...I-"

He raised his voice impatiently, "What do you have to tell me, Mudblood?"

Hermione gathered all her strength and looked him in the eyes as she said the next words, "I-I'm pregnant."

She held the eye contact, wanting to see his thoughts.

He was completely still for a long moment. It was as if he was not sure he heard her right. Then shock. His eyes widened in disbelief.

She extended her shaky hand towards him, her fingers grasping the air for him, yet knowing that she would not reach him.

"Mudblood," he spoke after a few moments, "What-"

"I'm pregnant," she repeated again.

It sounded wrong. It sounded sick. And it finally came crashing down to her that it was real. No more pretending. No more hiding. Not even from herself.

She burst into crying, her whole body shaking with the force of the sobs.

She did not want it.

It was wrong. So wrong.

Lucius looked like he was going to be sick. He was shaking as well, blinking uncontrollably.

"You are..." he tried to speak, but the voice died in his throat.

Suddenly he stood up, moving away from Hermione. She somehow pulled herself into a sitting position, looking at him through her tears.

He was standing completely still, not even looking at her anymore. He was thinking hard, Hermione could see that.

He cleared his throat, then spoke, "Whose is it?"

"Whose-" she could not believe what he was asking her, "Whose is it?" she repeated, anger taking over her.

"Yes," he nodded, "Whose is it?"

"You bastard!" she screamed, even though her throat hurt. It made him look at her and she held the contact.

"Whose could it be?" she asked again, "You were the only one! And you know it. How dare you?"

His face remained emotionless.

Silence.

"It's not possible," he spoke again, "I've been giving you the contraceptive potion in your food."

"The last time," Hermione replied, looking down, "B-Before you sent me back home. I haven't eaten anything that day. Or the previous day, I think."

She could literally see the blood leave his face. He was paler than she ever thought possible.

"I have to..." he struggled with himself, "I have to go."

And he left.

That was it,

He left the room. And he left her there. Alone. On the floor. Broken. Hurt.

In Draco's room.

Hermione forced her body to lay down on the floor. She was still shaking, every now and then her body would spasm violently.

She was no longer crying. What was there to cry about?

No more secrets. He knew. It was up to him to decide what to do with it.

It was not her problem anymore. It was their problem.

Everything was so messed up. Perhaps he would still want to kill her for destroying Draco's room.

Who did that, anyway? How did it happen?

Her head hurt from all the thoughts, worries and fears.

She closed her eyes.

**A/N: Finally! Something had to happen and now we can get on with the story. Lucius knows about her secret! What do you think he'll do? Tell me your opinion. I appreciate everyone who reviews and the ones who just read. :)**


	10. His Spawn

chapter 10

**~ HIS SPAWN ~**

Hermione awoke with a groan, her head feeling like it was going to explode and her body cramping horribly. She forced herself to open her eyes, realizing she was still in Draco's room. Then she remembered. The fight, the Cruciatus Curse. How long ago was that? He hadn't returned.

It was night. That much she could tell.

It felt strange. Being in Draco's room. She felt as if she was invading his privacy and that he might walk in any moment, yelling at her what she was doing in his room. Sadly, it was not possible, but she still wanted to leave the room as soon as possible.

What surprised her the most was that she was actually able to fall asleep. She couldn't even remember when and how that happened. Taking a deep breath, she tried to pull herself up, but failed miserably. Her muscles were too weak, she was still shaking uncontrollably. She had never before felt such after effects of the Cruciatus Curse.

Stubborn as she was, she gritted her teeth together and tried to push herself up again. This time a stabbing pain hit her lower stomach without a warning. Letting out a sharp gasp, she crouched over in pain holding her stomach.

_Oh god._

The pain was excruciating. Something inside her was cramping and Hermione could almost feel it moving. She recognized the feeling immediately. It was the same as when she was tortured with Crucio in the dungeons by one Death Eater.

Gathering all her strength, she pulled herself halfway across the room, trying to reach the doors. She needed to get help. Looking down at herself, she checked for any sign of bleeding, but there was none.

_Yet._

It was unbelievable how her body seemed to disobey her. Her legs were twitching by themselves and nothing was working as it should be. Letting out a loud cry, she gave up crawling when she was in the middle of the room and simply lay there, looking up at the ceiling. A strange feeling of calmness took over her.

She was giving up.

Lucius was not returning. He hated her and what she was carrying. And she did not blame him. Even she herself was not sure what she felt towards _it_. He was anything but dumb. He had to know what the Cruciatus Curse would do to her and now he was leaving her alone in the room, helpless and hurt, until she...until she lost it. Miscarried.

How could he accuse her of such a thing as destroying Draco's room? She would never do that. She respected the dead.

Unlike Lucius. He did not even respect the living.

She placed her hand on her stomach, almost feeling something contracting there. Perhaps she should not fight it. It would be the best for everyone.

_No._

She was a Gryffindor after all. She would not just _surrender_.

_Snape_. She could call Snape.

She did as he instructed her, rubbed the small stone on her bracelet and then waited.

The cramps did not go away. But there was no bleeding. Perhaps it was not that serious.

Hermione could feel herself slipping away. She closed her eyes and a moment later, she was gone.

ooo

"...on your complete discretion regarding the situation."

"...of course, Lucius...can trust me..."

"...could be a lie.."

"...what would she benefit from it.."

"...revenge.."

"...going to do?"

"...haven't decided yet..."

Two male voices.

That she could hear. But it all seemed so far away. She could not concentrate on anything. She was floating. Then she gave up and lost herself in unconsciousness again.

ooo

"It wasn't me," she whispered weakly, "I didn't..."

_"Miss Granger?"_

Hermione shook her head, "No, believe me..."

_"Miss Granger, you are dreaming."_

She opened her eyes and saw a dark figure leaning over her. Immediately she stiffened, her whole body going numb.

"It's me, Professor Snape," he said softly.

Hermione blinked a few times and her vision cleared.

It was really him.

"What..." she started, then looked around, realizing she was not in Draco's room anymore. And she was in a bed.

"Where am I?" she asked, trying to pull herself into a sitting position.

"You are in your bedroom, do not panic," he said to her, "You need to rest. Go back to sleep."

"B-But-"

"No _but_, Granger," he ordered, "Your body needs rest."

She gave up and relaxed, letting out a tired sigh.

Before she closed her eyes again, she looked at Snape, "Where is he?"

"He is not here," was his only answer, "Rest."

Then she remembered.

"W-What about..." she couldn't even finish the sentence, instead she placed her hand on her stomach.

"Everything will be explained when you feel better," he ignored her question and brought a small vial to her mouth, "Drink."

Hermione obeyed, grimacing at the awful taste and then closed her eyes, feeling incredibly sleepy.

ooo

When she woke up again, it was day outside. The sunlight was too bright for her eyes and Hermione had to look away, blinking.

She was alone in the room. But when she woke up before...Snape was there. She could remember seeing him, talking to him, but it seemed strange. Like she was remembering a dream. She looked at the nightstand. It obviously was not a dream. Snape was really there, because she could see at least five different potions standing on the nightstand. What were they for?

She made a move to take a closer look when the doors suddenly opened and in walked Snape.

"Miss Granger," he greeted, walking over to the bed, "How are you feeling?"

She cleared her throat before speaking, "It could be worse."

"Indeed," he replied.

"How did you know I was awake?"

"I have warded to room, to inform me when you wake up."

"_Oh_," she said weakly.

Silence.

Hermione wanted to ask so much questions, but did not know if it was safe.

She looked up at him and opened her mouth to speak, but then simply closed it again, a question burning in her eyes. He recognized what she was trying to ask and simply nodded, "You can talk."

"Where is he?" was her first question.

"He is currently out. He has some busines he needs to attend to," he answered, "I have stayed in the Manor to take care of you."

Hermione nodded, then felt her throat close up, "Tell me."

"What do you want me to tell you?"

She simply looked down, "I-Is it still...there?"

She held her breath in anticipation, not knowing what answer she wanted to hear.

"Yes, Miss Granger," he answered with an emotionless voice, "You are still pregnant."

Strange.

She felt no happiness at hearing that. But at the same time she was not angry that it was still there. She still did not know what to feel.

"However," Snape added, "It came close."

Hermione looked up at him, waiting for him to continue.

"When I came to you, you were already cramping badly," he explained, "Luckily, I had the right potions with me."

"Why did you save it?" she asked quietly.

"I beg your pardon?"

"Why did you save it?" she repeated the question, "What did he instruct you to do?"

Snape sighed, "Miss Granger, he was to one who called me. Even before _you_ called me."

Hermione's eyes snapped up, "What?"

"He told me to take care of you."

"But-" she started, them simply shook her head, "I don't understand him."

"He explained what happened and what led to your...fight."

"I didn't destroy Draco's room," Hermione repeated. She was so tired of saying that.

"I believe you," Snape replied, "The question is, who did it?"

Hermione was silent for a moment, lost in her thoughts. Who had access to Draco's room beside her, Lucius and the elf?

"It has to be her," she said quietly, then looked up at Snape, "That woman. _Patricia_."

Snape raised an eyebrow, "Patricia Deevilburh?"

"She threatened me, she thinks I'm an _obstacle_."

"I know there is something between her and Lucius, but why would she feel threatened by you?"

Hermione looked down.

"I did not mean it like that, Miss Granger, I only meant why would she go to such extremes to get rid of you?"

"I have no idea," she shook her shoulders, "Who is she?"

"A Pureblood, she was married to a Death Eater, but he died in the War."

Hermione nodded and after a moment she asked, "What did Lucius tell you?"

"He told me everything _you_ have told him," he answered, "About your pregnancy and he asked for a complete discretion. No one must know."

"Until he gets rid of it," Hermione muttered under her breath.

Snape was silent for a moment, lost in his thoughts, then he spoke, "I cannot predict what his decision will be."

"Well, _I_ can," she was positive what Lucius will try to do. There was no doubt.

Snape simply looked at her, not saying anything.

"Did he-" Hermione started, then paused, "Did he ask of you to check if-?"

"If what?"

"If it's his," she finished, looking up at him.

Snape narrowed his eyes in confusion, but shook his head, "No, he has not asked such a thing," then he added, "Do you think he has doubts about whose is it?"

Hermione let out a short laugh, "I know he has. He asked me himself."

"Well," Snape took a deep breath, "He did not say anything to me."

"Give him time," she said sarcastically.

"Miss Granger, Lucius is a man with many faults."

"Why are you telling me this?"

She was the one who knew best what his faults were. She had experienced it all on her own skin. His evil, his anger, his hate, his prejudices. It was nothing new to her.

"I have known Lucius for many years," Snape added, "He is everything you are accusing him of. But there is a different side."

Hermione took a deep breath, "Yes, I know. I have seen him with that Patricia. Unbelievable how different he was. Nice and gentle."

"He was like that with Narcissa as well," he explained, "He is a loyal Death Eater, but his family always came first."

"Even if that is true, it does not help me," Hermione shook her head, annoyed.

"It only shows you are not a Slytherin," Snape commented.

"What do you mean?"

He was silent for a moment, before he spoke in a low voice, "What I am trying to say is that you could use it to your advantage."

"_It_?" Hermione asked, confused.

He said nothing, but simply lowered his look, eyeing her stomach before looking her in the eyes again. Hermione opened her mouth to protest, but no voice came out. She had to use everything she had, even if she did not like it.

Snape nodded when she realized what he meant and then he walked over to the door.

"Wait," Hermione stopped him, "I-I need to ask you a favor."

He waited for her to continue.

"There is a girl I met while in the dungeons, she's a captive, _Melinda_," Hermione explained, "Can you see if she's still...if she's alright?"

Snape nodded, "Now try to get some rest."

With that he left and Hermione was left thinking. She was not sleepy anymore and there was no way she would be able to sleep with so much going on. She tried to form a plan in her head, how she would act when confronted with Lucius again, but she knew it was pointless. He was able to confuse her with only his stare. She would simply had to rely on her instinct.

ooo

She was positive she had at least one day more before she would see Lucius again. She was not ready, emotionally nor physically, to face him.

As if he knew that, he came only a few hours later.

Hermione was in her bed, lost in her thoughts, when he entered the room with no warning.

To say that she tensed at seeing him again would be an understatement. She went completely rigid, her hands clutching the sheet underneath her. She had expected him to curse her again at any moment.

He did not look at her as he closed the doors behind him and slowly walked to the bed, simply standing there. His was tense as well, he hardly breathed.

Silence.

He finally looked at her, forcing himself to meet her eyes.

Such cold eyes. Hermione felt a shiver go through her simply by looking at him.

"We need to talk," he forced out, his voice equal to his cold eyes.

"I-I guess we do."

Silence again.

Neither of them actually wanted to talk about that little problem. Both simply wanted to pretend it was not happening.

She could see the way he was looking at her. Like she was disgusting and he did not want to stand near her, afraid she might infect him with her sickness. Like there was something _wrong_ with her.

"Why did you not tell me before?" he demanded.

Hermione simply shook her head, "Why does it matter now?"

"It _matters_," he insisted, "You hid this important piece of information from me. Something that involves me, something that could seriously harm my position-"

"It involves you?" Hermione repeated, "So now you do not doubt it's yours?"

Lucius' face hardened and his eyes became even colder, if possible.

He ignored her question and instead asked, "Do you remember our conversation a few months ago? When you got your monthly visitor?"

Hermione blushed, still not used to him being so blunt about it, but she nodded. She remembered it clearly. That conversation had been replayed in her head over and over again in the last months. They were talking about the possibility of Hermione getting pregnant.

_"What would you do if it did happen?" she asked him._

_Not even a moment later she got the answer and there was no room left for argument or doubt._

_"I would terminate it immediately," he said emotionless, "I already had a son."_

Hermione could hear the words clearly in her head, it was as if she was hearing it again. Months have passed, but Lucius had not changed his mind. She could see it on his face, he was as disgusted about a Mudblood carrying his child as he had been before.

"I remember," she answered.

He said nothing. He did not have to say anything. It was obvious what he was thinking.

"When?" Hermione asked, knowing there was no point in trying to convince him otherwise.

He wanted to get rid of it. It was written all over his face.

He cleared his throat before answering, "Severus will be back later this evening with a potion. It is quite difficult to get," he explained, then paused for a moment before continuing, "Abortions are prohibited in this world."

Hermione raised her eyebrows in surprise. She did not know that.

Then she felt anger building inside of her. She had to go through all these trouble alone, without being permitted to tell anyone what was happening to her. She had to go through morning sickness and attacks of dizziness. And after all that, he was getting rid of it. He would order her to drink the potion and the mess would soon be out of his hands.

"Why all the trouble?" she asked, looking up at him, "Why don't you simply Crucio me again?"

"Do not push it, Mudblood," he said in a dangerous growl.

"_Push it_? That's a good idea, why don't you push me down the stairs and be done with it?" she demanded, raising her voice, "I can make it all easier for you, _I_ can push _myself_ down the stairs!" she screamed, pushing the covers off of her and standing up from the bed.

"Stop it," he ordered, "Sit down and-"

"No, I will _not_ sit down," she shot back, "Why don't you do it yourself? Why wait for some potion? You have your wand, use it. Use your hands, I'm sure you'll find a way."

He simply stared at her, breathing hard through his nose.

"You are weak," Hermione accused him, "I'm the one who's been through so much while carrying your..._spawn_ and you can't even-"

"Shut your mouth!" he snapped, his eyes murderous.

Hermione gritted her teeth together and simply glared at him. He was pathetic. Weak. He was a man enough to do this to her. Why couldn't he face it? No, it's much easier to let other people clean up your mess.

"Severus will be back in a few hours," he repeated.

There was nothing else to say. He simply left the room without a word.

Hermione could feel tears forming in her eyes, but she blinked them away. He was not worthy of her tears. Just as she was not worthy of carrying something of his. It had to be taken care of immediately. Why did it hurt her so much? What did she expect? That he would turn into some kind of a loving father? That was not possible. Funny, her blood status did not seem to bother him so much when he dragged her into his bed. She grimaced at the memory of it. That was a memory she would like to erase from her mind. The first time was so wrong. So cold and brutal and painful. All he wanted was to humiliate her and he succeeded. Hermione would never forget that night. And she would never forgive herself for giving her virginity to Lucius Malfoy.

Pushing those thoughts out of her mind, she sat on the bed and waited. There was nothing else she could do. Placing her hand on her stomach, she sighed, "Soon it will all be over."

ooo

She did not even have to wait long. Perhaps an hour passed, because she was still sitting on the same spot when Snape entered the room.

Hermione looked up at him and smiled weakly, "He's not coming, is he?"

_Pathetic_. He was not man enough to face what he had done.

But only a moment later, Lucius entered the room as well and Hermione could not help the look of shock that passed her face. She had not expected him.

Snape walked over to her while Lucius stood as away as possible, observing from the distance.

"This potion," Snape said, pulling a small green vial from his robes, "_Terminus_. You'll have to drink all of it and the process should start in a few minutes."

He handed her the vial and Hermione took it, her hands shaking. Why was she nervous? This is what she wanted, right? She would finally be herself again and there will not be something of his growing inside of her anymore.

She was silent, simply staring at the small vial in her hands.

"The best would be if you are in the bed," Snape explained, then flicked his wand at the bed and a towel appeared underneath Hermione.

She tensed, but still said nothing. She was afraid, truly afraid.

Silence.

After a long moment Hermione cleared her throat and looked up at Snape, "W-What can I expect?" she asked, her voice weak.

She could see he was playing his part. There was no emotion on his face as he answered, "You will feel cramping which will result in bleeding. You can expect shaking, feeling of coldness, you will perhaps feel sick. It is a painful process, but it is over in half an hour."

Hermione gripped the vial harder in her hands, already starting to shake subconsciously.

"Nothing should go wrong, but I will stay in the Manor for any case. I will return to you in twenty minutes," he said, then looked at Lucius and left, leaving the doors open. Which meant Lucius was planning on leaving too.

Just as he reached the doors, Hermione stopped him, "Wait! Please."

He stood there, his hand on the handle, not looking at her.

Hermione did not know what she wanted to ask him. She was angry at him, she hated him, but she was so afraid. She did not want to be alone. She _could not_ be alone during something like this.

"Please," she tried again, "Stay here."

He slowly let out a breath, then turned to look at her, "Why?"

"B-Because I don't want to be alone," she answered truthfully.

Why was she embarrassing herself? Why couldn't she put on a strong face and drink the potion?

Lucius sighed, then met her eyes, "What do you want me to do, Mudblood?"

"Just stay here," she whispered, "You can stand in the corner, just...don't leave."

He seemed to be lost in his thoughts, like he was having an inner battle,"If you need someone with you I can call Severus back-"

"No," she cut him off, "I need it to be you."

Why did she need it to be him? She could not even understand herself. How could she expect other people to understand her?

He was looking at her, not saying anything, but then he simply nodded. That surprised her, she had not expected he would actually stay. He seemed unsure of himself, he did not know what he was doing as well. Closing the doors, he walked over to the bed and stopped there, crossing his arms across his chest.

Hermione made herself comfortable on the bed and tried to uncork the vial, but it was impossible, her hands were shaking too much and her fingers seemed to get a will of their own. She let out an annoyed sigh and then suddenly Lucius snapped the vial from her hands, uncorking it and handing it back to her. Their fingers met and for a moment they both froze like that until Lucius pulled his hand away as if burnt.

Hermione stared at the small vial, not able to bring it to her mouth.

"I dreamt about it a few days ago," she confessed quietly.

"Excuse me?"

Hermione smiled weakly as she remembered, "I dreamt that it was a baby girl. She was so cute and small. Blonde hair and brown eyes."

Why was she talking about that?

Lucius was completely silent. It was as if he was not even breathing.

"I guess now we will never know," she whispered.

"Drink - " his voice broke and he started again, "Drink the potion."

Hermione nodded, but could not move.

Silence.

"It should have occurred to me before," Lucius said, a slight anger in his voice, "Something was different about you when you returned."

Hermione looked up at him, meeting his eyes.

"And then when you threw up after eating breakfast, the way you were observing herself in the mirror," he was thinking out loud, "It all makes sense now. When I think back, I cannot understand how I did not figure it out earlier. Perhaps I did not want to admit it."

"I was ignoring the signs as well, I did not want to admit it to myself," Hermione said quietly, remembering her horror at realizing she had not had her period for almost two months. She tried to blame it on the stress, on a disease, on anything but-.

"That night," Lucius' eyes widened in shock as he remembered, "When I was thrown across the room, it was - "

"I don't know," she shook her head, "All I know is that it wasn't me. The power didn't come from _me_. But...how is it possible? The..._baby_? Could it be?"

Lucius seemed thoughtful and did not speak for a few long moments, "It means it is not a _Squib_," he spat the last word with disgust.

"Does...does it matter?" Hermione looked up at him, waiting for a response.

He clenched his jaw, but then shook his head, "No, it matters not."

Of course. It did not matter if it had magical powers, it was half-blood and that was all Lucius Malfoy needed to know. But then why did he seem so..._hesitant_ almost? Was he reluctant about getting rid of it? No, that was not possible, Hermione reminded herself.

"I would appreciate it if you could hurry it up," he spoke, "I have more important things I need to attend to."

Anger shot through her at hearing that, "_More important_? Well, I apologize if I'm wasting your time. But believe it or not, this is important to _me_."

He remained silent, simply glaring at her.

"I can't believe what is happening," she said quietly, shaking her head in disbelief, "How did it come so far?"

"Mudblood-"

She cut him off, "I was just a girl when I came to you and now..."

"Drink the potion," he repeated, but his voice seemed weak.

"I will, but first I need to tell you something. We need to get something clear."

He let out a deep breath, but waited for her to continue.

"I did not touch Draco's room," such simple sentence, but he visibly tensed.

"I need you to believe me," she added, meeting his eyes.

Hermione could see he was still _angry_, _hurt_, but there was something _different_. She had expected him to yell at her again, accuse her, but he said nothing.

"Lucius?"

"I do not wish to speak of that incident at the moment," he forced out.

"But I didn't do it!"

"Mudblood-"

"I didn't hate Draco!"

Silence.

They both simply glared at each other.

Hermione took a few breaths to calm herself down and looked at the small bottle in her hand. There was no use speaking about it anymore. It had to be done.

Preparing herself for a horrible taste, she slowly brought the bottle to her mouth. She pushed all the thoughts away and decided to drink it, getting rid of all the problems.

Such intense silence filled the room. Nothing could be heard, not even their breathing.

And then just as Hermione's lips touched the mouth of the bottle, it was suddenly snapped away from her and it smashed on the wall, breaking into a million pieces. Hermione flinched in shock, looking up at Lucius in complete surprise and disbelief.

He was shaking, his eyes blood red. He looked like he was going to be sick.

"L-Lucius?"

He met her eyes, then simply shook his head, turning away from her.

She stood up slowly, walking over to him and then stopping. What should she do? She could see he was upset, his breathing was irregular, he was shaking violently.

"Why?" she asked quietly, looking at the shards and spilled liquid on the floor that had been the potion.

"This is sick," he said, his voice hoarse, "It's disgusting."

Hermione took a deep breath, "Why did you smash the potion?"

Silence.

"What do you want from me?" she asked, raising her voice a bit.

After a long moment he turned around, facing her, his expression hard. He was so pale.

He did not say a word, but his eyes dropped from her face down to her belly. She felt uncomfortable with him staring at her like that, but she forced herself to stay still. Her breath was caught in her throat as they stood there, not speaking.

Finally he broke the silence, "If you had told me before, we wouldn't be in such a mess."

"So this is all my fault?" she could not believe him, "You should have taken necessary precautions to prevent such thing from happening! I was just a girl, a _slave_ here, it was your responsibility to be careful!"

His hand twiched and for a second she thought he would strike her, but nothing happened.

"Do not play innocent, you knew well enough what you were getting yourself into," he sneered, "Or perhaps no one explained the risks of a sexual intercourse to you?"

Hermione blushed furiously, then gritted her teeth in anger, simply glaring at him. They were losing time by accusing each other and trying to decide whose fault it was.

"What now?" she forced the question out.

He was shaking his head and Hermione realized she had never seen his so...indecisive and shaken up. It seemed as if there was a battle going on inside of him.

"I have to think," he finally let out, not looking at her.

"What is there to think about?" Hermione asked, "Either we do this or we don't. And you just destroyed the potion-"

"Severus can get another one," he cut her off, his cold mask returning.

"Why did you destroy it?" she demanded, "It could have all been over by now."

"I need some time to think," he repeated, "Stop trying to see though me, Mudblood. You cannot possible know what is on my mind. There is much more at stake here than just that..._thing_."

That actually hurt. She did not think it would. She herself had refused to call the baby by what it was, but the way Lucius spat that word out stung. It _hurt_.

She simply nodded, moving away from him. She could not bear to stand in his presence. What she needed the most at that moment was time for herself. She needed to be alone.

As if he heard her thoughts, he walked over to the door, "We will talk later," with that he left the room.

Hermione could not believe what had happened. Not even in her wildest dreams had she expected Lucius to do what he did. He wanted to get rid of the...baby, he was disgusted with what was growing inside of her, she could see it in his eyes. Then why did he stop her before she could drink the potion? What was he thinking? What could be happening inside his head?

As she sat down on the bed, she threw a glance at the spilled potion.

What now?

ooo

A day passed.

And then another.

No one came to her room besides the elf when he brought her meals. All Hermione could do was think.

What did she even feel towards him?

_Lucius Malfoy._

A Pureblood supremacist.

It had all been so easy in the beginning. But it all changed.

Did she hate him? She had said so many times in her fury, her anger, but was it true? Did she really hate him? Would she kill him if she had to? Hermione had to admit that the answer would probably be '_no'_.

Did she love him? There was a short period of time when she thought she did. But soon she realized she was mixing love with...the feeling of connection she felt when she was with him.

Was she attracted to him?

Hermione could feel herself blushing at the mere thought of it, even though it was only a conversation she was having with herself. No one would ever find out about it, but she was still embarrassed. It was wrong. He was much older than her, he could be her father. But she did not find him...disgusting. She did not feel disgusted thinking about him. She felt disgusted thinking about _Antonin Dolohov_. Lucius Malfoy was physically attracting. There was no denying that.

But his cold and evil personality made it impossible for Hermione to think about that. The things he had done, the things he forced her to do, it was horrible.

He murdered Ron. That was something Hermione never forgot, but did not like to remind herself of. It would only make her more disgusted with herself and her own behavior. How could she feel anything else but pure hate towards the man that killed her first love?

Despite Lucius' cold and ruthless nature, every now and then Hermione caught glimpses of his more human nature. The fact that he did love his son and his wife made him different than Voldemort. He was not pure evil.

And their short but brutal sexual relationship left emotional scars on Hermione. She knew deep down that it was wrong and sick and disgusting, but at the same time when they were together she felt more connected to Lucius than ever before. For the first time since the War she was not alone. She was dependent on him, but at the same time she would not allow herself to become too weak. It was a constant battle.

That was a short description of how Hermione saw their relationship, what she felt towards him. She only wished she could know how Lucius saw everything that had happened between the two of them. What would he say about her?

ooo

"What are you going to do now, Lucius?" Snape asked.

"I have not decided yet."

"The decision needs to be made. And soon. We are running out of time."

"I am aware of that."

"He expects the answer soon."

"What do you advise, Severus?"

"The girl needs to know. Perhaps she would not mind."

"_I_ mind! Damn him."

"You have two choices."

"_Three_. I can simply get rid of him. Make him disappear without a trace."

"That would be highly unwise. It would raise suspicions and that is the last thing we need."

"Go talk to her, Severus."

"What can I tell her?"

"Nothing about that idiot. Simply see what she is doing."

"I will return in a few minutes."

ooo

Hermione jumped out of the bed when she saw Snape.

"Thank god you're here," she said nervously, "I need to talk to you."

He closed the doors behind him and walked over to her, nodding, "I know what happened," he looked down at the spilled potion in the corner of the room. It was still there. No one bothered to clean it up.

"What has he said?" Hermione asked quietly.

"Nothing important. He does not talk much."

"What now?"

"We wait. The decision is not up to you."

Hermione crossed her arms over her chest, "It's _my_ body. It's _my_ decision."

"Do you know what you want to do?" he asked, raising his eyebrow.

Hermione bit her tongue and shook her head, admitting that she had no idea of what she wanted. It was all too complicated.

"There is another problem," Snape said firmly, "We do not have much time, I will try to explain everything quickly to you."

"What is it?" she asked, she could tell it was something serious.

"Do you remember that vampire that attacked you while you were in the dungeons?"

Flashback hit her.

A young man, not much older than she, with the darkest eyes she had ever seen. She clearly remembered his seductive voice, his intense look. There was something so dark, yet gentle and appealing about him. She felt drawn to him. And now she knew why. He was a vampire. They were known to draw victims to them whether it was by using their charm or their hypnotizing eyes.

"_A-Anton_?" she asked.

Snape nodded, "What do you know about vampires?"

"What I read in the books."

"I thought as much," Snape replied sarcastically, "The books do not tell you everything, Miss Granger. Vampires have special abilities. They have improved smell, taste, eyesight. You can hardly hide anything from them."

"Why are you telling me this?" she asked, narrowing her eyes in suspicion.

He took a deep breath before continuing, "When he drank from you, he immediately knew you were carrying. Your blood had that special essence, especially in this case, when the father is a Pureblood."

Hermione could feel a shiver go through her. She was almost afraid to ask why was he telling her about it.

Snape continued, "Lucius does not want you to know this yet, but Anton is demanding to see you again."

"What?" her mouth opened in shock, "Why would he want that?"

"I do not know, but he is very persistent," Snape explained, "Yesterday he admitted to Lucius that he knows about your condition."

Hermione could not believe it. That vampire knew all along.

"Why did he wait so long before saying anything to Lucius?"

"I do not know. He has been trying to see you ever since your encounter in the dungeeons, but only yesterday did he start threatening, admitting he knows about your secret."

"God," Hermione shook her head, "What if I hadn't told Lucius? Then he would have find out from some vampire? He would be even more furious than he is now."

"Indeed," Snape replied, "He was angry that a vampire found out about your secret before he did, but that is irrelevant now."

"What is he threatening to do?"

"Anton is threatening to spread the news about Lucius Malfoy impregnating a...Mudblood."

She could see he was not comfortable using that word, but she let it pass.

"A-And what would happen if everyone found out? Would it be that bad?"

"There were many rumors about the two of you. Death Eaters were starting to rebel against him, not trusting him anymore. When you disappeared we managed to get a control over the situation. No one has doubts about Lucius anymore. But if they found out about _this_," he pointed to her stomach, "Chaos will ensue."

Hermione nodded, understanding the situation, but then something occurred to her.

"But isn't that what we want? Get rid of Lucius? Destroy him?" she asked quietly.

"We want to destroy the whole monster, not just cut of it's arm. And for that we need Lucius in charge. Imagine what would happen if someone else took over."

Hermione did not even want to think about that. They would attack the Muggle world immediately, there was no doubt about that. And she could not allow that to happen.

"I understand," she nodded, "But what do we do now?"

"Either you end the pregnancy and Anton will have nothing to threaten us with or you agree to meet with him."

Meet with a vampire.

"Alone?" she asked, hugging herself with her arms.

"He has not revealed the terms yet, but I can presume he wants to be alone."

"Why?" it all sounded so strange and unbelievable, "What does he want with me?"

"I do not have an answer to that, Miss Granger," he admitted.

She took a shaky breath, not saying anything.

"Miss Granger, Lucius is a very possessive man. And in this case that is good for you," Snape explained, "He is not very keen on the idea of letting that vampire anywhere near you."

"I know," she brought her hand up and touched the scar that was there, "He was angry..._disgusted_ that I got bit."

"It is a way for a vampire to mark their possession. I would expect Lucius was not pleased by what happened."

"So all I can do is wait?"

"Remember, you are not supposed to know about any of this. I will try to convince Lucius to tell you, but until then play ignorant. I have told you this to prepare you. Use the time you have got and come up with a plan. Think hard about what you are going to do," Snape said to her, almost using his teaching voice.

"I will."

"Lucius expects me," he said and turned to leave the room.

"Wait! The other day when you said that you'll be needing my help soon, distraction, what did you mean by it?"

He spoke in a low voice, "We will need you to do everything in your power to keep him at the Manor. We are soon expected to make a ... _business trip_, but Lucius must not go."

"Business trip?"

"Everything will be explained in time, do not worry. While you are still in this _condition_ I will have an excuse to see you."

He looked at her, nodding his head and then he left the room.

Hermione needed to sit down. There were so many things she needed to think through. Lucius was in danger and she was the only one who could help him. But was she really ready to face a vampire just to save him? Was he even worthy of her help? Probably not, but Snape was right. They could not afford losing Lucius. Not yet.

Lucius. He was a coward. And so was she. They could not even bring themselves to call _it_ by what it was. A baby. It was much easier pretending it was a _thing_, _it_.

And would she be able to help the Resistance? She doubted she could do anything to prevent Lucius from going on that so-called trip. What would she have to do to make him stay? She had many things to think through and not enough time. She didn't think her life had ever been so complicated as it was at that moment.

**A/N: This chapter was written faster than I expected! I really got into the story and had a lot of fun writing this piece. :) I know many of you worry that Lucius will suddenly become all nice, but don't worry. He will not turn into a loving father. That is simply not in his character. But there will definitely be some interesting changes. Keep reading and you'll find out. :) Please, tell me what you thought of this chapter. I just want to warn you that the story will become much darker and more adult in the next few chapters. I don't know if many of you will like it, but give it a try. Thanks again for reading!**


	11. Chapter 11

**chapter 11 **

Hermione had expected Lucius to come running to her with a new potion as soon as possible. But he was nowhere to be seen. For two days she had been left completely alone. And that was nerves wracking. She hated it when he left her alone like this. Especially when there was such an important decision hanging in the air.

What was taking so long anyway?

She hated it. Hated the feeling of not knowing.

And that was why she could not be more glad when one morning the elf informed her she was to clean the study room. She did not question why or if it was Lucius' idea. All that mattered was that she was finally allowed to leave her bedroom.

The elf accompanied her to the study room and then it simply opened the doors for her and when Hermione walked in, the small creature disappeared.

"Close the doors."

Hermione flinched at the voice, not expecting anyone. But _he_ was there, sitting behind a desk and going through some papers. Hermione obeyed, closing the doors and then turning to look at him. It was strange. There were so many questions she wanted to ask him, so many things she needed to make clear, but he was ignoring her.

Silence followed and Hermione took a few moments to look at the study room. She had been here once before. Perhaps even twice. But she clearly remembered the first time. It was a few days after she was brought to the Malfoy Manor. Lucius had a party with all his friends and she was the entertainment.

She shuddered at the mere memory of that. Even though it happened many months ago, she could still feel panic in her throat, the adrenaline in her veins as they threw her to the ground. She struggled like a wild animal but there was no doubt she would have been defeated if Lucius hadn't interfered.

She was blind at the time. She did not see the exquisite green rug on the floor or the large desk and an enormous bookshelf behind it. More books. Hermione could not help but wonder exactly how many books were there in the Malfoy Manor.

There was also a black leather armchair near the large window. The view was marvelous. It was still snowing and it seemed magical. Especially with the heat coming from the fireplace. For a moment Hermione allowed herself to daydream about sitting in front of that raging fire, enjoying the view or reading a book.

"Are you going to stand there all day?" Lucius commented, looking up from his papers.

Hermione was brought back into reality and quickly shook her head, "What do you want me to do?"

There was a slight smirk on his face, but it quickly disappeared and Hermione could not help but wonder if she had imagined it.

He pointed towards a small bucket of water and a cloth rag on the floor near the window.

The floors again? Couldn't he find something else?

With an annoyed sigh she walked over to it and kneeled, keeping her back to Lucius. She lowered the cloth into the water and then nervously started rubbing the floor. It was strange, she had expected him to leave her alone. She did not want to clean in front of him. Not wanting to turn around and look at him, she kept her head down, but she could feel something on her back. That weird tingling feeling as if he was watching her.

Was he?

Why would he?

ooo

It was uncomfortable being in the same room with him, but not talking to him. They were both minding their own business, but there was still tension in the air.

With each passing minute she was closer to the desk where he was sitting. Would he move or was she expected to clean around him? That fact annoyed her a bit. She had nothing against cleaning, she did not think it was degrading, but the way he was forcing her to do it... It was like he was trying to show her where her place was. On the ground, while he was standing above her, looking down at her. It would only give him greater pleasure if she showed it bothered her. That was why she kept on an emotionless face.

Her back was hurting and her legs were slightly cramping, so she stood up to stretch them.

"What are you doing?" a voice came from behind her.

"Just stretching," she answered, not turning around to him.

"I do not remember giving you permission to take a break."

This angered her and she looked at him, her face blushed.

"I don't need your permission for this," she shot back.

He simply raised an eyebrow, "Fiery temper."

Silence.

"It's been a long time since you've been so insolent, Mudblood," he continued, "Perhaps I should do something about it?"

_Perhaps you really should_, said Hermione in her mind, but the words never left her mouth. Instead she stared at him until she simply turned around, ignoring him. She did a few neck flexing exercises and suddenly she felt arms around her waist. She froze completely, surprise and confusion on her face.

She did not even hear him walk over to her.

She could feel his breath on her neck, his body pressed against hers, but she did not move. She wanted to show him it had no effect on her whatsoever. But it was hard to ignore him, the warmth of his body, the smell of him.

"Have you gained some weight?" he suddenly asked, his voice low.

"N-No," her answer perhaps came too quickly.

What was he implying? She did not notice that her body changed. It was still too soon, right?

"I like it," he purred, "At least now I can grab on to something."

"Y-You won't be grabbing on to anything," Hermione replied, keeping her voice even, "At least not with me."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes."

"Then why don't you push me away?"

Gathering her courage, she did just what he had suggested. She pushed him away from her, turning around to look at him. He had allowed her to push him away, obviously. She was positive she would not be able to move away from him if he decided so.

He stood there, slightly smirking at her, but he said nothing.

After a long moment of silence, she quietly asked, "What are we doing, Lucius?"

"What do you mean?" he acted innocently.

"You know what I mean."

He was about to answer, but a knock on the door interrupted their conversation.

"Enter," Lucius said, moving away from Hermione, walking over to his desk.

To Hermione's surprise it was Snape who entered.

"Good morning," he greeted, barely throwing a glance at Hermione.

"Severus, finally," Lucius replied, looking through some papers, "I need to show you something."

Hermione observed them and then suddenly something was thrown at her direction. She narrowed her eyes in surprise and noticed a small piece of paper on the floor, next to her.

It was probably from Snape.

She looked at Lucius, noticing he was not watching her. Nervously she kneeled down, pretending to grab a cloth, but she quickly took the small piece of paper, hiding it in her hand.

"Mudblood."

She flinched and looked up at Lucius, her heart beating like crazy.

"I think you should go to your room. You can finish your work tomorrow," he said, dismissing her with a wave if his hand.

Hermione simply glared at him, not knowing what to say. She half expected Snape to offer her the potion she was waiting for. But he obviously did not have it.

And Lucius...He did not wish to discuss important things, things that needed to be discussed and she could not make him do something he did not want to do. Truth be told, she too did not want to discuss it. If it were up to her, she would pretend everything is alright. She would ignore the situation she had found herself in.

"Pippy," he called and the elf immediately appeared.

Without taking his eyes off Hermione, he instructed the elf, "Take her back to her room."

ooo

Once she was safe in her room, Hermione waited a few minutes before she unfolded the paper.

_Four days from now. _

_You need to force Lucius to stay in the Manor for the day._

_Do **anything.**_

That evening she spent a great deal of the time simply observing herself in the mirror, Lucius' little comment replaying in her head. She was trying to find evidence that she had indeed gained weight. She found none. Was she unable to see it? Or was he simply torturing her? He knew she did not want the...child and used that remark about her gaining weight to torture her further.

Hermione had trouble sleeping that night.

ooo

The next morning after breakfast that annoying reminder of her condition decided to return. The morning sickness. She was doubled over in the bathroom, clutching her stomach and trying to will the sickness away. Just as she thought she was feeling better, the sickness returned and she emptied her stomach in the toilet.

She heard a small pop and suddenly the elf appeared on the doorway, "Miss."

Hermione looked at him, waiting for it to speak.

"Master says you has to be in his study in five minutes."

She let out a tired sigh, then shook her head, "I can't."

"But Master says-"

"I'll need more than five minutes," Hermione said, closing her eyes, "Tell him I'll be downstairs in half an hour."

"But-"

"Please, Pippy, just tell him that."

"The Master will punish Miss if she disobeys."

Hermione laughed slightly at that, "Don't worry about me."

She heard the small elf disappear and she rested her head on her knees, trying to relax.

ooo

Hermione had not expected him to come looking for her. She knew disobeying his order would annoy him, but she never expected it to annoy him so _much_. He obviously did not tolerate disobedience. And she knew that.

"Mudblood?"

She heard him call her from the bedroom. Not even a moment later he was in the bathroom, standing at the doorway, looking down at her oddly, not saying anything.

Hermione forced herself to look at him, though she hated being so weak and she hated that he was the one to see her in such a state. She could see he lost his composure for a slight second, before turning back to his calm and collected exterior.

"I requested your presence in the study room," he said coldly.

Hermione could not believe him. Was he _blind_? Could he not see the state she was in?

"I said I'll be downstairs in half an hour."

"I said five minutes."

Hermione rolled her eyes, "I am not feeling so good at the moment."

His jaw twitched, then he asked, "And what seems to be the problem?"

Was he serious?

"I'm feeling sick and I just threw up everything I've eaten for breakfast, my back hurts like crazy and I can't get up without everything spinning around me!" the anger in her voice was more than evident.

He simply stood there, observing her with a calm expression on his face. When she realized he was not going to comment her little outburst, she placed her head on her knees again, taking deep calming breaths.

"Come," he suddenly said, walking over to her.

Hermione looked up at him in surprise, not actually sure of what to do.

He took her arm and helped her to her feet. Hermione forced herself to ignore that act of kindness from him.

He led her to the bedroom and Hermione sat onto the bed, keeping her eyes on the floor. It felt strange when his hand left her arm, it felt as if something was missing.

"Narcissa used to have them too," he quietly commented.

Hermione's head shot up in surprise and disbelief. Had he really mentioned his wife in front of her?

"W-What?" was all she could say.

"Morning sickness," he explained, "There were times when it would get really bad."

Hermione did not know how to respond to that. Was she even allowed to respond? She was not supposed to talk about his wife. He himself had told her that.

Then she realized one small thing.

He knew how bad his wife's morning sickness was. That meant he was around. She could not imagine him being a loving and caring husband, dealing with his wife's pregnancy. But perhaps he was different back then? He was younger, perhaps not as evil as he was now.

Snapping back into reality, she looked up at him, "Give me ten minutes and I'll come downstairs."

He was silent, simply observing her, his face void of emotions.

Hermione could not stand his penetrating gaze anymore and she snapped, "What is it?"

Why was he looking at her like that? What was he thinking? Was he perhaps concerned for her? No, that was not possible. But for whatever reason he was looking at her that way, Hermione did not like it. It made her feel so small and vulnerable. And that was the last thing she wanted to be in front of Lucius Malfoy.

So she put on a strong face and looked at him, "Forget about those ten minutes. I'll come downstairs right now. Do you want me to finish the work in the study room?"

He answered only after a few long moments, shaking his head, "I don't think you will be doing anything today."

"What do you mean?"

"I think the best would be if you remained in the room for the day."

Her mouth opened in surprise, "What? Why?"

"Suffice it to say I would not enjoy the sight of you vomiting in my study room. Besides, I just got a new carpet," he sneered, "You will remain here."

"But I'm alright!"

"You are not."

Hermione could not believe him. She was not buying his story about not enjoying seeing her vomit in his study room. There was more behind his words. But what was it? What did he want?

"Why?" she finally forced out.

"I already told you-"

"I don't believe you," she cut him off, then sighed, asking the question that had been bothering her for quite a while, "What are we going to do? Where is that potion?"

Lucius tensed a bit at that question, she could see it.

"Severus is having trouble getting one ingredient. It might take a few days."

"Is that the truth?" she asked quietly.

"Believe me," he started, "I do not want to deal with this problem any longer than I have to."

Hermione wanted to remind him that he was the one to destroy the potion in the first place, but that would be pointless. He would never admit what he was really feeling or thinking, so it would only be a loss of time.

She sighed, then nodded, "_Fine_."

"Good," he said, then added, "You will continue your work tomorrow."

After that he left the room, locking the doors.

ooo

The rest of the day went unbelievably slowly. She spent most of it simply observing the outside world through a window. Everything was covered in snow and Hermione could feel a small pinch of sadness at not being able to go outside and enjoy. She loved winter and snow.

But then she decided to stop torturing herself and closed the curtains. There was nothing she could do, so she took Lucius' advice and decided to rest. She had a feeling tomorrow would be a very difficult day.

ooo

After breakfast the house elf led Hermione downstairs into the study room. She was feeling well and she could not be more glad for that, even though it meant cleaning the whole day long.

Just as the previous day, the elf disappeared as soon as she entered the study room. _He_ was there, sitting at his desk. This time he did look up at her, but only to point at the bucket of water waiting for her in the corner.

No words. Nothing.

Hermione sighed and went to work. It really bothered her that he was in the same room. Couldn't he leave her alone?

After a few moments of scrubbing the floor, she got that strange feeling. That tingling sensation at the back of her neck, as if someone was watching her.

Was he?

Without thinking, Hermione turned around and their eyes met for a second before he looked down into his papers again.

He was looking at her!

_Why?_

Trying to ignore that, she returned to her work, thinking about a Polyjuice potion and it's ingredients to try and keep her mind off Lucius.

_Lacewing flies_

_1 ounce of crude Antimony_

_16 scruples of fluxweedthat _

As she went on, trying to remember the rest of the ingredients, she suddenly heard his voice.

"My my, what a sight."

Immediately tensing, she pulled the robe down, covering her thighs a bit more. She hadn't realized it went that up while she was scrubbing.

"Why so quiet, Mudblood?" he asked innocently.

Hermione remained silent, not knowing what to say. Perhaps if she ignored him, he would stop bothering her. Why was he talking to her anyway?

Not only a moment later she heard him moving and before she could react, he was behind her, pulling her up from the floor. She tried to turn around to face him, but he would have none of that and simply pressed her harder against his chest.

"What are you doing?" she demanded, forcing her voice to sound calm, even though her heart was jumping like crazy.

And it was not because of the fear. There was something _else_. Of course, there _was_ slight fear, this was Lucius Malfoy and she could never know what he would do next. But the real reason why her heart was threatening to jump out of her ribcage was hiding behind something else.

Perhaps _excitement_? _Need_? Something primal and dark. She could not describe it with one word.

"You talk too much," Lucius said, wrapping his arms around her waist, pulling her closer to him.

"Stop this," she demanded, but it came out as a whisper.

He did not move away, simply taking a deep breath.

"What would you like me to do?" he purred in her ear, his voice thrilling the her as he gave her a gentle thrust to urge her to respond.

Hermione froze, not believing what was actually happening. It would surprise her if _he_ could not hear her heartbeat.

"I-I told you," she answered, her voice breaking.

"I do not believe you," he said calmly, "A few months ago you would scream, hit and kick, anything, just to get away from me."

Hermione remained silent, feeling the warmth of his body, even through his clothes. It felt _right_ to be there, pressed against him.

He continued, "And now...you melt at my touch."

His hand slowly and lazily made their way up, caressing her.

Hermione closed her eyes and rested her head back against the his shoulder. The logical part inside of her was shouting that she was insane, that she should push him away, but for some reason she did neither of those things. She was sick and tired of battling with herself. Also, she wanted to know what was between her and Lucius. And the only way to find out was to surrender to him. Was that so wrong?

Hermione's breath caught in her throat when his hand pushed the robe down her shoulders. It caught around her waist, but left her upper body exposed. She was only in her bra and could feel the coldness of the room on her bare skin. This got her attention and tried to cover herself, snapping free from her fantasy.

"Don't," she heard him purr into her ear again.

There was something about his voice, his hands, his body pressed against her, that relaxed her.

"It has been so long, Mudblood," he whispered, bringing his lips to her neck, to that spot where she had been bitten. He covered that small scar with light kisses and it felt as if he was taking back what was taken away from him.

"Lucius," she stammered softly, swallowing the small lump of nervousness that rose in her throat.

Before she even realized what was happening, he turned her around and pressed his lips to hers. She almost lost herself in his passion, trying to respond and keep up with his experienced kisses.

After a long moment he broke the kiss, "Are you enjoying this?" he asked smoothly, his hand on her side moving inward until his fingers brushed the underside of her breasts through her bra.

Her heart pounded beneath his hand and her breathing quickened slightly when his hand slid to her back. With one flick of his fingers, he undid her bra and that piece of clothing was soon on the floor, forgotten. She blushed a bit, feeling uncomfortable with being exposed like this while he was completely clothed. It felt as if that gave him more power over her.

Every thought was forgotten as soon as his hands slid round to cup both of her breasts, running his thumbs across her nipples, drawing inarticulate sounds of surprise and _pleasure_ from her. Then one hand left her breast, to be replaced by his mouth, gently sucking.

Hermione's legs were shaking and she knew her knees would soon betray her. A moment later, Lucius kissed her again, wrapping his arms around her waist, holding her.

"Mudblood," his voice sounded thick and he was having trouble breathing. But his face betrayed no expression, only undisguised want.

If only he would call her by her real name. _Hermione_. It would make everything better. She would be able to pretend everything is normal. But with calling her Mudblood, he only reminded her of their situation.

Before she had a chance to say anything, he kissed her again, more fiercely this time.

And then their whole fantasy came crashing down as the doors opened.

"Lucius, dear, the elf said -"

Hermione let out a short scream, then covered herself with her hands, pressing herself into Lucius, trying to hide from that person, who ever it was. She was trembling, her face red. She was so embaressed all she wanted to do was hide.

Lucius wrapped one arm around her, shielding her naked form from that person at the doors.

"What is the meaning of this, Lucius?"

Hermione tensed as she recognized the voice. It was that woman. _Patricia_.

Of all the people, it had to be her.

"Have you forgotten how to knock?" Lucius snarled at her.

Hermione quickly pulled the robe back up, covering herself. She still could not see that woman with Lucius standing in front of her, his body hiding her.

"Lucius," Patricia started, hurt and anger evident in her voice, "What were you doing? And with _her_?"

Hermione did not want to stay to hear the answer. She was too ashamed and shaken up. Without saying anything, she ran past both of them out of the study room, up the stairs, not stopping until she was safe inside her room.

Only then did she allow herself to crash to the floor, burying her face in her hands, trying to hide from the world. She could not believe what just happened. It seemed surreal.

She was so embarrassed. What had gotten into her? Why did she allow Lucius to do that do her? Why did she like it?

No more pretending.

She needed to admit that she liked him touching her. What was that? It wasn't love.

Perhaps she was sick and twisted, liking his dominance over her. No matter how much he hurt her, she still craved his touch, his voice, his smell. She was aware of all the horrible things he had done in the past, not just to her, but to people she loved. And still, she did not feel disgusted by his touch.

She would have let him do anything to her, she would have allowed him to make her his in the study room, on the table, on the floor, against the wall, it did not matter. At that moment she was unable to think. Her mind had shut down completely.

_Thank god we were interrupted._

Then she remembered who had interrupted them. Patricia.

Behind all the humiliation and embarrassemnt, she had to admit she did feel a bit of satisfaction. That woman hated her, thought of her as an obstacle, tried to get her in trouble and turn Lucius against her. And now she saw them together. A small, vengeful part of Hermione hoped the sight of her and Lucius together angered that _Patricia_. She hoped it made her feel worthless and betrayed, just as Hermione had felt when she saw Lucius and her together in the bedroom that night a few days ago.

Not wanting to think about it anymore, Hermione took a quick bath, but it did not help. She could still feel Lucius on her skin. No matter how hard she tried she could not prevent her mind from thinking about what was happening in the study room at that moment. Were they perhaps fighting? Or did Patricia decide to ignore what she saw? Perhaps they were...reconciling?

_No. I need to stop thinking about it._

She turned off the lights and within moments she was safe in her bed, completely covered. She wished she could stay under the covers for the rest of her life.

ooo

She heard the doors opening.

_No no no._

Forcing her eyes shut, Hermione tried to ignore the sound of someone walking towards the bed. She knew it was him. And she did not want to talk. She did not even want to see him. How could she show her face and look him in the eye after what happened? She was not a whore.

_But you act like one,_ a small voice in her head said.

Hermione tensed, but remained still.

Perhaps he would leave if he thought she was asleep.

Silence.

Trying hard to keep her heartbeat even, Hermione noticed he was not moving anymore. He was most likely standing there, next to the bed, observing her. She could almost feel his presence.

"I know you are not asleep, girl," his voice cut through the silence.

Hermione did not respond to that, keeping her eyes closed.

"I know you," he continued, "And I know you would not be able to sleep after what had happened."

_Just ignore him. He will go away._

"Enough with the games," he said, annoyed, and pulled the covers off of her.

Hermione flinched and finally opened her eyes, but did not move from her position. Neither did she look up at him.

He sighed, "What are you playing at now?"

Silence.

"Mudblood, I am talking to you," he said in a low voice.

Finally, Hermione spoke, "It's late."

"Yes, it's past midnight," he agreed, "But that is of no importance."

Hermione let out a tired sigh, "What are you doing here? I'm tired and I...don't want to talk."

"Oh," he said innocently, "Well, I did not mean to bother you. I just assumed you would like _this_ back."

She looked up at him and noticed he was holding her bra in his right hand.

He smirked, "You have forgotten it in the study room."

Hermione blushed and looked down, "Can I have it back?"

"Hmm," was his only response.

Her head snapped up to meet his eyes. There was such a smirk on his face and Hermione could not stand it. He knew well enough she was still embarrassed about such things and he enjoyed torturing her with it.

Without thinking, Hermione stood up and snapped the bra from him, throwing it on the bed behind her. He simply raised his eyebrow, amused by her behavior.

"All you had to say is 'please'," he spoke, "There is no need for such impolite behavior."

Hermione shook her head in disbelief. He was tutoring her about impoliteness?

"You can leave now," she said quietly.

Lucius took a step towards her, his eyes narrowing, "Correct me if I'm wrong, but this is still _my_ house."

Hermione met his eyes and waited.

"Which means, every room in this house is mine. And you are..._less_ than a guest here," Lucius explained, his voice cold, "I have every right to be here. And I have every right to do with you as I see fit."

"No."

"Excuse me?"

"I said _no_," she repeated, stronger this time, "You may believe that, but I will not let you control me."

He smirked, "Need I remind you of that little incident in the study room?"

Silence.

Then she looked at him, "Did it ever cross your mind that it happened because I _wanted_ it to happen?"

That caught Lucius' attention and he waited for her to continue.

"You did not force me or control me," she explained, keeping her voice confident, "Perhaps I wanted it. Perhaps I wanted to kiss you, to touch you, to feel you."

A slight shadow of surprise showed on his face, but he quickly hid it, "You do not believe that."

"Think about it. Why did I not struggle?"

After a moment he nodded and sneered, "You do realize what that makes you?"

Hermione tensed, but did not say a word. She knew exactly what that made her.

He looked straight into her eyes, but then simply turned and walked away. Hermione was left with that horrible feeling in her chest, feeling of nothingness, of betrayal and disgust.

He left the room and Hermione returned to her bed, knowing she would get little sleep tonight. That one word kept replaying in her mind.

Whore.

ooo

The next morning Hermione felt a bit better. Even though the memories were still strong, she decided to stop accusing herself. The situation she was in was hard. It was a miracle she hadn't gone completely insane. There was no telling how Luna or Ginny or Lavender would have behaved if they found herself in her shoes.

Snape once told her that she was very brave. She _survived_. And that was the most important.

After breakfast the elf accompanied her to the study room and left her there. But this time there was no one in the room, which surprised her.

Thinking Lucius had to come soon, she hugged herself with her arms and waited. The only sound in the room was the sound of her breathing. She looked around, observing the room. There were papers on the table, books on the shelves. Perhaps she should take a look. Just as she moved, she realized something. It felt like a trap. Why leave her alone in a room like this? He was not stupid. He knew she was curious and she would snoop around.

It had to be a trap.

Just as that thought formed in her mind, the doors opened and Hermione could not be more surprised at who she saw enter. She had expected Lucius.

The shock made her speechless for a few moments.

"Good morning," Patricia said and offered her a smile that did not quite reach her eyes.

Hermione simply blinked, not knowing what she was supposed to do.

"Are you alright?" the woman asked.

_This is unbelieveable_, Hermione thought. She was tired of meeting that woman every day.

"Do you _live_ here?" she finally asked.

Patricia let out a short laugh, "Oh, no, unfortunately. Not _yet_."

Hermione did not miss the hidden meaning in her words. That woman obviously meant serious business with Lucius. She was not simply his lover.

"Where is Lucius?" Hermione asked, tensing up.

"He should be here soon," the woman answered.

Silence.

Hermione looked around nervously, but she could feel that cold stare. There was a strange energy coming from that woman, all Hermione wanted was to get away from her.

It was all strange. Why was she pretending as if the event from yesterday did not happen? It would make Hermione feel better if she simply confronted her about it. The fact that she was not talking about it and was actually being polite to her, sent shivers down her back.

Then suddenly Patricia sighed and pulled her wand out.

Hermione took a step back, "What are you -?"

ooo

She woke up, shivering.

_So cold._

_Freezing._

Her eyes flew open and had to close them again at the painfully white sight in front of her. Everything was _white_.

And it was so_ cold._

And...why was she _wet? _Her robe was completely wet.

Hermione looked around, confused, then immediately pulled herself up, her body shaking uncontrollably.

_I must be dreaming._

She was outside.

"What -?"

Looking around, she realized she was in front of the Manor, in the garden.

_How?_

Her mind was having trouble processing questions. It was _freezing_. And her robe was completely wet from lying in the snow. Who would do this to her? And how?

It hurt so much. She felt tired, her muscles were exhausted from shaking violently. She could not breath properly, all she was able to do was take short breaths. Hugging herself, she ran to the Manor, letting out moans of pain. She could not feel her toes anymore and that fact frightened her. As she ran bare foot through the snow, the feeling of numbness spread up her legs, making it impossible to run fast. After a few moments, she was barely dragging herself towards the Manor, her teeth chattering uncontrollably. She had to be careful not to bite off her tongue.

When she finally reached the large front door, she tried to open it, but it would not even move.

Panicking, she started screaming, calling for someone, hitting the doors.

Nothing.

It was _so cold._

Her whole body hurt and now it seemed as if her fingers were on fire, even though they were as cold as ice. Hermione brought her hands to her mouth, breathing into them, hoping to warm them, but it did not help. Even her breath was cold.

Soon she could not stand anymore.

Sliding down, she hugged herself with her arms and tired to keep her breathing calm.

Horrible image formed inside her mind.

Her frozen body found the next day.

Who would find her?

Lucius?

Then she remembered.

It was her. _Patricia_. That was the last thing she remembered before she woke up in the snow.

_No no no._

_I can't die like this. Not like this. Not because of her._

Gathering all her strength, she screamed at the top of her lungs. Her throat was hurting, but she did not care.

"PLEASE! OPEN THE DOORS!"

She coughed a few times, almost choking on her fear.

Just as she was about to scream again, the front door moved, then opened inward. Hermione looked at who it was.

The small elf stood there, confused.

"Miss?"

"T-T-Thank you, thank y-you," Hermione managed to say, forcing herself to stand up.

She took a deep breath and somehow limped her way in the house. She did not feel her feet, nor her fingers anymore. All she wanted to do was collapse, but she could not do that. She needed to do something first.

"Miss?" the elf followed her, but Hermione did not answer him.

She somehow reached the study room and pushed the doors open. They were both there as Hermione had hoped.

There were no words to describe the shock on Lucius' face, but Hermione could not deal with him at that moment. Her eyes moved onto Patricia, who was looking at her coldly and her lower lip was twitching in anger.

"What the hell happened, Mudblood?" Lucius asked, the shock evident in his voice.

No matter how cold Hermione was, she could feel something hot inside of her,_ anger, rage_, it grew with each passing second and just as it was about to explode, she stormed over to Patricia and slapped her hard across the face.

_Smack._

Hermione must have hit her hard, because Patricia lost her balance and ended up on the floor. For a second it seemed as if the time stopped. Neither of them moved.

Hermione could feel herself shaking with cold, with pain, with _fury._

Then Lucius was beside her, grabbing her arm painfully, "What in the name of Merlin are you doing?"

Patricia remained on the floor, glaring at Hermione. There was a red hand print on her left cheek. Hermione must have really hit her hard, but she could not feel it, her hands were completely numb.

"S-She th-hrew m-me out," Hermione managed to say, still shivering violently.

Lucius narrowed his eyes in disbelief, "What?"

"I-I woke u-up o-outside, i-i-in the s-snow."

He needed to believe her. Her heart would shatter into a million pieces of he decided to believe Patricia instead. She could not stand it.

"Lucius, you cannot possibly believe any word she says," Patricia said and slowly got up from the floor, wearing an offended face.

"D-D-Do you t-think I-I did this m-m-my...myself?" Hermione asked, looking up at Lucius who was silent.

She felt foolish, barely able to speak, but her teeth were chattering and her body was literally betraying her. But that was not important. All that mattered was that she was safe.

Lucius' eyes traveled down her body, inspecting her and there was such a shock on his face. Hermione could imagine what she looked like.

"Lucius-" Patricia started, but Lucius cut her off, "Leave. We will talk later."

"But-"

"I said _leave_!" he snapped at her and even Hermione flinched at his tone.

The woman left without a word.

Hermione's knees buckled, but Lucius caught her before she could fall down.

He was so warm.

Without thinking if it was appropriate or not, she pressed herself against him, shivering.

"You are freezing," he commented, "Come."

They slowly made it to her bedroom, Hermione holding on to his body as if her life depended on him.

He seated her on the bed, then called the elf, ordering hot tea.

He then touched her shoulder, trying to take her robe off. Hermione flinched away from him, shaking her head and looking up at him.

Lucius let out an annoyed sigh, "You need to get out of that robe."

"I-I'll d-d-do it m-myself."

He was annoyed by that, she could see, but he nodded. With a flick of his wand, new clothes appeared on the bed next to her. He took a step back, crossing his arms over his chest and waited.

He was not planning on leaving or giving her privacy.

Hermione did not have the strength to argue with him. He had seen her without clothes before. And now was not the time to act childish.

It took her a few minutes to change, but when she was finally in clean and dry clothes, she collapsed onto the bed, pulling the covers over her. Lucius approached her, flicking his wand over her. At first she wondered what spell he used, then she started to feel warmth all around her.

_A warming spell._

She could not be more grateful for that.

Closing her eyes, she could feel the blood returning to her toes and her fingers.

_It's alright. I'm safe now._

She almost drifted off to sleep, when she heard his voice.

"You need to drink some tea."

She opened her eyes and then shook her head. All she wanted to do was sleep.

"I will have none of that," he said firmly.

With a groan she pulled herself into a sitting position, then carefully reached for the cup of tea on the nightstand. Her hands were still shaking and she almost spilled the hot liquid all over herself. Suddenly Lucius' hand was over her fingers, preventing her from dropping the tea, stopping her shivers.

Hermione took a sip of tea, enjoying the feeling of warmth in her mouth, then down her throat. She could not believe how close to death she was. What if she had not woken up when she did? She would have probably froze in the snow.

Lucius cleared his throat, making Hermione look at him.

"Are you hurt?" he asked.

It sounded unnatural, hearing him ask that question.

She shook her head, "I-I don't think so."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes."

His eyes slowly dropped down, from her eyes to her stomach.

Hermione immediately tensed, fighting the urge to cover herself with a blanket. For some unknown reason, she did not move. Not even when his hand slowly reached towards her. She looked at it as if it were a snake, but the moment his hand touched her belly, the whole world went away.

His eyes were like glittering diamonds in the dark. There was an unreadable expression on his face. She could not determine what he was thinking. Why was he touching her?

It felt right.

Her instinct was to cover his hand with hers, but stopped herself before she actually did that. She doubted he would appreciate it.

And then he snapped out of it, moving his hand away as if he was burnt. He cleared his throat again, looking anywhere but at her face. Now there was emotion on his face. _Regret. Disgust._

"You should go to sleep," he said.

"But we have to talk."

"Tomorrow."

His answer left no room for arguments and Hermione forced herself to lay back had expected him to leave, but he did not move.

After a moment, she quietly asked, "What do I mean to you?"

She did not expect him to answer. But she felt as if they have never been as close as they were at that moment and she had to ask.

"I do not know," he answered, not looking at her.

It was something. At least he did not answer with the standard 'you are a Mudblood, my slave' answer.

Closing her eyes, she realized she liked the feeling of having him close to her. She could feel him sitting on the edge of the bed, she could feel his presence, hear him breathing. And it actually relaxed her. Within minutes she was asleep.

**A/N: Another chapter! :) I really wanted Hermione to snap at Patricia. ;) Hope you enjoyed. And for those of you who are worried that Lucius will become OOC, do not worry. I would never allow that, even though he does have his tender moments. Sadly, they never last. Tell me what you thought of this chapter. :)**


	12. Losing A Part Of Her

chapter 12** LOSING A PART OF HER**

Hermione could not remember when she last felt so warm and comfortable. She was not hungry, not worried, not in pain. Everything felt _right_. She felt rested and did not even want to open her eyes to wake up from that. But soon she had to admit it was time to wake up. Slowly she opened her eyes and blinked a few times until her eyes got used to the sunlight.

She turned around and then gasped in shock as she noticed Lucius sitting on the edge of the bed. He simply raised his eyebrows at her, amused by her reaction.

Hermione pulled the covers up to her neck and then cleared her throat awkwardly before speaking, "What are you doing here?"

It surprised her how tired and weak her voice sounded.

"I stayed here in case your condition got worse over the night," he answered.

"My _condition_?" Hermione asked, pulling herself into a sitting position, "What are you talking about?"

"Do you not remember?" he was slightly surprised, "Yesterday evening, when you almost froze to death."

Hermione looked away, trying to gather her thoughts and memories. Taking a deep breath, she slowly started remembering what had happened. The snow, the coldness, Patricia.

"Oh God," she whispered, pulling the covers tighter around her as a shiver went through her.

"I take that as a sign that you _do_ remember," he drawled.

Hermione simply nodded, remembering the horrible feeling of fear, panic and hopelessness. She was so close to death. She could have easily frozen to death and that would be it. The end. Ever since she was captured she imagined how she would die. Many horrible ways. Death Eaters killing her, Lucius killing her, she herself taking her own life. But it was always with a curse or by hands, never had she imagined there was a possibility she would freeze to death. Never.

"I believe we have to talk," he said, snapping her out of her thoughts.

"I believe we do," she agreed, but she did not actually know how to start the conversation.

Then he began, "I would like you to tell me everything that happened."

Hermione took a deep breath and started, "Yesterday morning the elf brought me to the study room to continue my work. Once I was alone, suddenly someone entered. I thought it was you, but...it was her."

Lucius listened, never taking his eyes off of her.

Then Hermione's memory started to become unclear, "I don't remember what happened next...I just remember we talked and then she pulled her wand out. Then...nothing. The next thing I remember is being outside, in the snow."

Lucius did not speak for a long moment, but then he asked, "What did you two talk about?"

"I-I don't remember," she shook her head, "It was nothing important. I think I asked about you, but..."

"Yes?" he raised a brow, waiting for Hermione to continue.

"I expected her to...to confront me about what happened in the study room...when she caught...interrupted us," she finished the sentence, looking down at her hands uncomfortably.

"And she did not?"

"No, not a word about that."

Silence fell upon the room and Hermione could not even hear him breathing. If she could only know what he was thinking.

Slowly she gathered the courage and looked up at him, "Do you believe me?"

That question caught him off guard and he did not answer immediately.

"Do you believe me?" Hermione repeated the question, emotions getting a hold of her.

She needed him to believe her. Not only because she was in danger, but because...deep down she needed him to take her side on this one. She could not explain it to herself, she just felt it.

Lucius took a deep breath, then met her eyes, "She will pay for what she had done."

Relief. He did believe her.

She let out a breath that she had been holding, then asked, "What are you going to do?"

"Leave it to me."

"But-"

"I have told her, _many_ times, that she is not to get in any way involved in my relationship with you."

Before he could continue, Hermione interrupted, "_Relationship_?"

She could not believe what he had said. He used the word _relationship_. It sounded so strange, but at the same time it was some sort of a confirmation from him. Whatever she was to him, she was not merely an object.

He tensed up, but did not try to deny it. And that surprised her the most. She was waiting for him to explain why he accidentally used that word and that he did not mean it, but nothing happened.

He was silent.

Hermione used that moment to remind him of another incident that happend a few days ago, "And...Draco's room. Do you now believe me that it was her?"

His eyes got that murderous look in them and Hermione was thankful it was not directed to her.

"She will pay," he forced the words through his teeth.

Silence.

Then Hermione felt the need to make something clear.

"I don't want you to think I am...jealous or against you..._seeking company_," Hermione started awkwardly, "I understand your need to have...someone and I'm...well, I'm sorry -"

"Are you _apologizing_ to me?"

Hermione did not answer. _Was_ she apologizing?

"Patricia was...an entertainment for me. It was fun while it lasted, but I told her at the beginning she will never be nothing more than a mistress. Obviously she had trouble accepting that."

"Oh," Hermione let out.

"It was simply sex."

Hermione did not reply to that, feeling a bit breathless and uncomfortable.

It did not escape his attention, "Why do you turn red every time I mention such things?"

She looked up at him and noticed he was smirking at her.

"W-What things?" she decided to play dumb, hoping perhaps he would drop the subject.

"Sex."

Obviously not.

She could feel even more heat in her cheeks and she tried to calm down, but it was not working.

"You turned even redder," he commented, looking at her with interest.

"Your private life is of no interest to me and... and can we change the subject?" she asked nervously.

"Hmm."

"What?"

"Why are you uncomfortable talking about it? You are an adult, are you not?" he insisted.

The last thing Hermione wanted to do was talk with Lucius Malfoy about such things. Why was he pushing it?

"Yes, I-I am an adult, but...I don't like to talk about it...with you," she explained.

He observed her for a moment before finally nodding.

"Will I ever see her again?" Hermione asked, looking up at him.

Lucius' eyes got that dangerous and dark look in them before he spoke, "Never. And hopefully neither will I."

Hermione finally relaxed. That was all she wanted to know. That woman caused her nothing but trouble and she was glad to have her out of the way. How was she supposed to concentrate on working for the Resistance when someone was always trying to get her in trouble with Lucius? That was the only reason, Hermione tried to convince herself.

"I will have Pippy bring you breakfast," Lucius said, getting up from the bed.

"Why do you do that?"

"Excuse me?"

"Breakfast, lunch, dinner," Hermione explained, "I now get meals regularly. Why? What changed?"

His face hardened at that. It was obviously a subject he did not want to talk about. But Hermione needed to know.

"Why do you always ask so many questions?" he spoke quietly.

"Why do you always refuse to answer?" she shot back before she could stop herself.

Silence.

"Mudblood," he started, "There are some answers I cannot give to you."

She felt as if he slapped her across the face when he called her Mudblood. There were some tender moments where she actually forgot who he was and who she herself was. Until he did something like calling her a Mudblood and her whole fantasy came crashing down.

She simply nodded.

Lucius sighed, a hard look on his face, "I need to take care of some business, but when I return we will talk."

"About what?"

"We will talk when I return."

End of conversation.

ooo

Hermione knew what day it was. It was the third day. Tomorrow she would have to convince Lucius to stay in the Manor. It was her first mission for the Resistance and she wanted to do the job correctly, but she had very little hope. Snape had not given her much to work on. She knew nothing except that Lucius must not leave the Manor.

What could she do?

How could she change his mind and force him to stay?

She did not have that much of a power. Snape obviously overestimated her abilities.

ooo

After only two hours Lucius returned to her room, wearing an angry expression. Hermione tensed up at the sight of him. Something was wrong. Whatever it was, it was making him furious. She did not speak, waiting for him to start first.

"Do you remember that animal that drank from you while you were in the dungeon?" he suddenly asked, no formalities.

Hermione quickly nodded, "Anton."

She clearly remembered him. Young, twenty-something, dark hair, handsome face, mysterious and hypnotizing dark eyes. Unconsciously her right hand moved up to touch the scar on her neck. It was still there, a reminder of what he did to her.

She noticed Lucius' eyes moved to her neck and he tensed, his eyes turning murderous again.

"What is happening, Lucius?" she demanded.

He composed himself, his eyes moving up to her face, "He wants to see you again."

Hermione could remember Snape telling her that. Only a few days ago he warned her about Anton and explained that the vampire was blackmailing Lucius.

She let shock pass her features, "W-Why?"

Hopefully she seemed surprised. The last thing she needed was Lucius finding out that Snape already warned her about it.

"He would not reveal a reason," he explained, "But he is very _persistent_."

Hermione remained silent, not knowing how to react to that. What was she expected to say?

"He knows," were Lucius' next words.

"About what?"

His eyes slowly dropped to her stomach.

Hermione knew that as well, but she had to play the part of an ignorant girl, "What? _How_?"

"He is a vampire," Lucius simply said as if that explained everything.

When she looked at him confused, he continued, "Probably when he drank from you..." he trailed off, a disgust showing on his face.

A few long moments passed in silence.

"What happens now?" she finally asked.

"If he does not see you, he threatens to tell everyone about _it_," Lucius said darkly, "I have worked very hard to obtain my reputation and I will not lose it now. Not because of _that problem_."

Hermione could not help but feel a twinge of disappointment at his words. It was painful to watch him go from slightly tender man to a cold and cruel one. But she had to remind herself that he was Lucius Malfoy. She kept forgetting that.

"I cannot do anything at the moment, my hands are tied," he spoke coldly, "But he will not live long. People who threaten me, rarely do."

Hermione let out a shaky breath, "When? How will we meet?"

"In an hour. In the Manor. The study room," he answered, "I gave him half an hour. The room will be warded and I will know if...you call for me."

"So you won't be present?"

The situation was getting more and more dangerous. Hermione did not want to be alone in a room with a vampire that attacked her before. What did he want with her?

"Will you stay close?" she quietly asked.

"I will be outside the room. He will not try anything if he knows what is good for him."

"Alright."

Even though Lucius appeared confident, Hermione knew he would not be able to do anything if the vampire decided to...to do something to her. What did he want from her anyway? He would not go through so much thouble just for a conversation with her. He wanted _something_. And he was a Death Eater. That equaled evil.

Lucius took a step closer and his voice was barely above a whisper as he spoke, "If you do not want to..."

"Lucius?"

"I can get rid of him, it would be risky and it would raise a lot of suspicion, but I could do it."

Hermione could not look away from him, his eyes were so deep and...he really meant what he was saying.

She shook her head, "No, you can't. It's too dangerous. And...I don't want you killing anyone. Not for me."

"It's a bit too late for that," then his expression turned serious again, "Are you sure?"

"Yes. I can take care of myself. I'll be fine."

She was lying.

ooo

Anton was already waiting in the study room when she and Lucius entered. Her eyes stopped on him and she could not explain why she felt strange energy in the air. There was that dangerous vibe coming from him, but at the same time she felt drawn to him.

"Half an hour," Lucius spoke coldly, "And I will be standing right outside. If I hear as much as a cry from her, you are dead," he threatened, glaring at the vampire.

"There is no need for such words," the younger man replied.

Lucius tensed, but did not say anything to him. Instead he turned to Hermione, speaking to her through his eyes. She could clearly see what he was trying to tell her. It was strange, seeing his so openly concerned for her. She simply nodded, reassuring him she would be fine. Lucius took a deep breath, then left the room, closing the doors behind him.

Hermione turned to face the young man, looking at him bravely.

"Do you remember me?" he asked, a smile forming on his lips.

"How could I forget? You gave me quite a scar," she noticed he was slowly approaching her, but she held still.

"I apologize for that, there's no way we could avoid that."

"Actually there was," Hermione shot back, "You could have decided to not bite me."

The man let out a short laugh, "You know who I am, right?"

"_What_ you are."

All Hermione wanted was that the half an hour he had with her would pass already. But as if time was mocking her, the minutes seemed to drag on.

"That's a bit harsh," he said, "Do you always judge a person before knowing them?"

She raised her eyebrows at him, "I think the fact that you drank from me, gives me the right to judge you."

"Again, I apologize."

Hermione opened her mouth to speak, she expected him to defend himself, but he apologized. Again. She surly did not expect that. Something about him was intriguing to her. He had that mysterious vibe around him. And she had not expected him to be...normal to talk to. She had not expected they would actually talk.

"What...what do you want?" she asked, not wanting to play around anymore.

"Straight to the business?"

"Yes."

He smirked, but then simply shook his head, "You don't have to be so tense."

"Am I expected to believe all you want to do is talk?"

"Yes," he nodded, then added, "For now."

"_For now_?" then she realized what he meant by it, "You think we will see each other again?"

"We will."

His arrogance sent wave of anger through her and she gritted her teeth in frustration, "Why?"

"I am...intrigued by you."

"And because of this you are threatening Lucius to expose us? I found that hard to believe."

He narrowed his eyes in surprise, "_Lucius_? I find it strange that you would call him by his first name."

"Why wouldn't I?" Hermione asked, not wanting to pretend anymore. The man in front of her already knew everything, there was no need to pretend.

"I want to know if the rumors are true," he asked, a slight sparkle in his eyes.

"What rumors?"

"About the two of you."

Hermione sighed, "I don't know what people have been saying. I don't go out much, as you can guess," she said sarcastically.

He let out a short laugh, "There were quite a few rumors -"

"I don't want to talk about Lucius and I," she said, a determined look on her face.

Anton observed her for a moment, then nodded, "Alright. We can talk about other things."

What was he playing at?

He pointed towards the armchair, "Would you like to sit?"

"No, I'm fine," she replied, crossing her arms over her chest.

"Please, I insist."

She bit the inside of her cheek, but then accepted his offer. She walked past him, her eyes never leaving his form. There was that feeling of danger, she could not bring herself to trust him, no matter how normal he seemed. He obviously noticed her behavior, but did not comment, only smile.

As she was sitting comfortably in the armchair, he sat down across her, looking at her strangely. Hermione shifted, feeling uncomfortable under his gaze, "What?" she snapped.

"It's interesting.

"What is?"

His eyes finally met hers as he spoke, "You have scars on both of your wrists and I could not help but notice a few scars on you arms and the other side of your neck."

Hermione looked down, biting on the inside of her cheek nervously.

"You have many scars and yet you seemed enraged about that little scar I left on you. It's...nothing in comparison to the others."

Hermione quickly rearranged her hair so that it covered her neck and crossed her arms over her chest, hiding all the scars. She did not like other people seeing them. She did not even want her parents seeing them, she could not imagine how she would explain them.

"I am sorry, I did not want to make you uncomfortable," he said seriously.

Hermione decided to ignore that topic, "I don't understand you."

"What do you mean?" he asked innocently.

"All we are going to do is talk?" she still could not believe him.

He simply nodded.

"A-Alright," Hermione decided to play his game.

She would not push him. If he wanted to talk, then they will talk. Sooner or later he would have to reveal his true plans.

"So..." she started uncomfortably, "How old are you?"

That question seemed ridiculous. It made it seem as if they are two normal people in normal circumstances having a normal conversation. And that was far away from reality.

"I'm twenty-six."

She nodded, "Did you go to Hogwarts?"

"Yes, a few years ago."

"Which house?" the moment the words left her mouth, she realized how stupid it sounded.

He smiled, "Slytherin."

"Of course."

"And you?" he asked.

At her look of surprise, he smirked, "Not all of us know who you are. All I know is that you are Hermione Granger, Harry Potter's friend, a Muggleborn witch."

That last part made her look up at him in shock. He said _Muggleborn witch._ It had been so long since anyone called her a _witch_. She could not understand why he did not just call her a Mudblood like everyone else. Perhaps it was all a part of his plan.

So she decided to pretend as if she did not notice it, "I was in Gryffindor."

"Hmm," he responded, "The second best house."

"The first," Hermione shot out before she could stop herself.

He simply laughed at that, but did not comment.

"So...how did you become...I mean how long have you been -?" Hermione did not know how to form her question, she did not know if he even wanted to talk about it.

"A vampire?" he finished for her, "It happened three years ago. I was...on a mission for the Dark Lord."

Of course he was. It was good that he reminded her of who he really was. She almost forgot it.

After a moment of silence, she could not help but ask, "Are you really not planning on...drinking from me tonight?"

"As tempting as it is, no," he replied, a dark look in his eyes, "I am positive that if you as much as let out a silent cry, Malfoy would come barging into the room, am I correct?"

Hermione did not answer his question, but he was right. She knew Lucius was just outside the room. She could almost feel his presence near by. Could he be listening?

"Besides," Anton continued, "I...took care of that before I came here."

Hermione's blood ran cold at hearing that. She could just picture him on some poor defenseless captive, his teeth deep in the neck, his hands holding the victim still, blood pouring from the wound.

"I never take too much," he said quietly, noticing the expression on her face.

"And that makes it alright?"

"I am what I am. You can't judge me by that. I did not have a choice in the matter."

"You did have a choice in becoming a Death Eater," she said to him, a hard look in her eyes.

Deep sigh, "Are you going to keep attacking me the whole evening?"

"No, but then we would not have anything to talk about."

"How about we talk about you and Malfoy?"

Hermione forced the calm expression to stay on her face as she asked, "What about us?"

"Tell me your...history," he smirked, "I would very much like to hear it."

"Fine," she nodded, "We lost the War, I was...blinded by some Death Eater, Lucius decided to take me as his reward, he brought me to this Manor and here I am. The end."

Anton let out a short laugh, "Very interesting story, but I think you forgot to mention many other things."

"Such as?"

"Perhaps your disappearance from the Wizarding World and of course...the very reason I am here, talking to you," he said, throwing a glance at her stomach.

Hermione stood up, anger cursing through her, "You don't have the right to demand that from me. Either you start searching for other topics we could talk about or the conversation is over."

He shook his head calmly, "You cannot end the conversation. It ends when I say so."

"You truly think so?" she asked, raising her eyebrow.

"Yes, I believe I do," he said, his confidence showing through.

Hermione looked at him for a long moment before speaking, her voice low, "Before I decided to accept your demand and come talk to you, Lucius offered me another choice."

"And what might that be?"

"Get rid of you," she replied, her voice cold, "He was deciding whether to kill you or not."

Anton's face hardened a bit at that, but his tone remained calm as before, "You can tell your lover that is not such a good idea if he knows what if good for him."

"He can do it," Hermione continued, "I have seen him murder people. And I'm not threatening you, but I want you to know what you're getting yourself into. Don't play the game if you're not capable of playing."

"Don't worry about me. I can take care of myself."

Fine, Hermione thought. She had warned him, if he wanted to keep risking his life or unlife, it was his decision. She did not care if he lived or not. He was a Death Eater. And a vampire. Why didn't she simply let Lucius do what he wanted to? The more she thought about it, the more clear it became to her. It had nothing to do with Anton and all to do with Lucius himself. She did not want him to kill anyone. She did not want him to be a murderer. If she could only change him, her conscience would not be screaming at her every time she allowed herself to feel something towards him. If only.

Minutes went by in silence. Hermione did not expect that to be even more mortifying than having a conversation with him. The clock was ticking in her head and she prayed that soon their time would be up. Nervously biting her lower lip, she threw a glance at the door, hoping that Lucius would enter soon.

"You truly relay on him?" Anton asked, interrupting her thoughts.

"What?"

"You keep looking at the door," he explained, "Do you think he's there? What if he doesn't care what happens to you?"

"He's there," Hermione said, no doubt in her voice.

"Interesting," he commented.

Silence.

Finally he took a deep breath, looking up at her, "I have a question for you."

Hermione waited for him to continue, noticing the serious expression on his face.

"What do you know about the death of -"

Before he could finish the question, the doors flew open and a very nervous looking Lucius entered.

Hermione let out a breath she'd been holding at seeing him. It was finally over and nothing serious happened. She was safe.

Anton stood up, clearing his throat, then looking at Lucius.

"I believe your time is up," Lucius drawled.

"Yes, I believe it is," he replied, smiling.

"Wait!" Hermione started, "You were about to ask me something about - "

"Never mind, it is not important," Anton cut her off, "Out time is up and I respect that."

Hermione noticed the change in his behavior, "But-"

"You know where the doors are," Lucius cut her off, sending a cold look at Anton who simply nodded.

There was such tension in the air, Hermione feared one of them was going to pull out their wand and start a duel. Though it seemed Anton's attention was focused on her and Lucius was merely an obstacle.

"It was nice talking to you, I hope to see you again soon," Anton said to her politely.

"I do not believe that will happen," Lucius shot back, "Now leave before I get you thrown out."

With a mysterious smile and a nod, Anton turned and left the study room.

Hermione stared at him until he was out of sight, trying to understand what he was doing. He was about to ask her something important, but then acted ignorant when Lucius came. What was that all about?

"Has he done anything to you?" Lucius asked, turning around to face her.

Hermione took a moment to observe the slight panic on his face. Even though he tried to hide it, it was obvious. He was not such a good actor as he'd been in the past. His mask was slowly starting to slip from it's place.

Finally she shook her head, "No, we just talked."

"Talked?" he repeated, and then he tensed, "About what?"

Hermione had expected him to be relieved or surprised at hearing that all they did was talk, but instead he was alarmed.

"About...a lot of things."

"Such as?" he pressed on.

Hermione narrowed her eyes in suspicion and stepped away from him, "Why are you so interested in what we talked about, Lucius?"

He immediately turned into that cold and calculating Lucius as he smirked down at her, not saying anything. Hermione had trouble understanding if he was pretending. That smirk seemed slightly forced, but other than that nothing seemed fake.

"I have every right to know what you talked about," he drawled.

"No, I don't think you do."

It annoyed her how he automatically assumed he had a right to know everything about her. Her thoughts, her soul, her body, he was still convinced he had every right to it. He had not changed a bit.

"So if I understand you correctly," he said calmly, "You expect protection from me and yet you do not feel the need to return the favor."

"Lucius," she started slowly, "We just talked, nothing important."

She was so tired of arguing, tired of mind games, of living under the constant pressure. If she could just have a normal conversation with a normal person again. She could not even remember the last time.

After a moment of silence, he finally accepted her answer, "Alright."

He did not intend to forget about that conversation, she could see it on his face, he was simply pushing that problem away for now. And she could not be more thankful for that.

"Go back to your room," he ordered.

Hermione left without a word. On the way to her bedroom, it accurred to her that he was actually leaving her unaccompanied to wonder about in his house. Why? Was he starting to...trust her? Finally she had the liberty she always wanted, but all she did was walk to her room. There was nothing in the house that could help the Resistance or help destroy Lucius. The main key to everything was Lucius himself.

ooo

The evening was closer with each passing second and Hermione was a nervous wreck. She knew what day was tomorrow. And what she had to do. What was expected of her.

_Don't let Lucius leave the Manor._

But what could she do? And where was he supposed to go?

Hermione needed more information. Suddenly she felt angry at Snape for demanding so much of her and not giving her enough to work with. Then despair took over her at the realization that she was most probably going to fail. She was going to disappoint them all. Why did she come back into the Wizarding World if she was not capable of doing anything right?

The nerves were killing her and she could not even sit down. Pacing up and down, she tried to think of a plan to keep Lucius in the Manor, but nothing came to her mind. She could not just ask him to stay. She could not sneak into his bedroom and tie him to the bed. There was nothing she could do!

ooo

Another few hours passed and still Hermione had no plan. Slowly she was starting to lose hope. Looking down at the bracelet that Snape gave her, she considered calling him. She had to tell him that there was no way she could go through with it. She had to tell him that he could not count on her.

She felt like a failure.

Only a few moments later, she heard steps and talking. The noises were becoming louder and she realized someone was walking to her room. She composed herself and waited, soon the door opened and Lucius entered, wearing a dark expression, followed by Snape.

Hermione' heart jumped a bit at that. Perhaps not all was lost, perhaps she could talk to Snape in private.

"Good evening, Miss Granger."

"Professor Snape," Hermione nodded, "What are you doing here? What -"

Then a realization downed on her and her face went pale.

"Is it about the...potion? Do you have it?" she asked, not sure how she felt about it.

Her eyes moved from Snape to Lucius, who was simply standing there, not saying a word.

"No," Snape answered, "But that is why I am here. I need a sample of your blood."

"Why?"

"I am having trouble getting the last ingredient so I decided to make a potion of my own, but I need a sample of your blood," he explained, "And with it, the potion should be ready in two days."

"Oh," was all she could say.

She looked at Lucius who refused to meet her eyes. Why was he looking away? Why did he pretend not to notice her?

"We should get started," Snape said, motioning towards the bed, "You should sit down."

"I will leave you to it," Lucius finally spoke, "Severus, meet me in the study room when you are...finished here."

Snape nodded and Lucius left the room as if in a hurry.

Hermione waited a few seconds in silence, then moved closer to Snape, whispering, "What is going on? Where is that potion? Are you stalling? And we need to talk about tomorrow. I-I don't know what to do, you need to give me more information, I -"

"Miss Granger," he interrupted her, then sighed, "We have only five minutes. Use them wisely."

She nodded, "Tell me the truth about the potion."

"It is the truth that I am having trouble getting the last ingredient, but at the same time...yes, I am stalling."

"Why?"

"We think you could perhaps use your condition to control Lucius."

"We?"

"The Resistance," he spoke quietly.

Hermione shook her head, "What are you talking about? Firstly, this is my choice. You have no right to force this onto me, if I want to get rid of it. And secondly, Lucius does not want it. It disgusts him, I can't control him!"

"Be creative, Miss Granger, I know I am not the only one that has noticed the change in Lucius' bevahior. Even though he is not admitting it, the situation is affecting him. You need to use it to your advantage. To our advantage."

She could not listen to him anymore. He did not know what Lucius was like. He was not the one living with Lucius. The Resistance and Snape were expecting impossible from her.

"Just prepare the potion," she said, her voice hard.

"As you wish," Snape replied, "Our intention was not to force you into something you do not want, but...think about it."

Hermione stared at him for a long moment, then took a deep breath and changed the subject, "Tell me about tomorrow."

He raised a brow at her, "What do you wish to know?"

"How about _anything_? That would be acceptable," anger took over her again, "What am I expected to do?"

Snape sighed, "Tomorrow morning Lucius is supposed to go somewhere. You need to change his mind."

She let out a short, hysterical laugh, "And how am I supposed to do that?"

"Improvise," he drawled, then his face went dark, "It is serious, Miss Granger."

"What do you mean?" she could see the warning in his eyes. She was afraid to hear the answer.

He spoke quietly, "We are planning an attack."

"An a-attack?"

"Yes. And if Lucius does not stay in the Manor tomorrow, it is most likely he will be killed."

Hermione's breath caught in her throat. It felt as if all blood left her head and she was simply standing there, looking at Snape. Her mind was trying to understand what he just told her.

"He..." she tried to speak, but failed miserably.

"He will not survive."

No. No. No. It was not supposed to end like that. Hermione could not imagine Lucius being dead.

"There is going to be a meeting. Twenty Death Eaters, including Lucius. They will be killed. And if Lucius comes to the meeting, he will be one of them."

"W-Why don't you do something? Prevent him from -"

He cut her off, "Even though it is in our best interest that Lucius remains alive for the time being, we will not interfere. It would raise suspicions."

"If Lucius dies, somebody else will take over?"

"Yes and that is exactly what we want to prevent."

Hermione knew what could happen if someone else took over the Wizarding World. There would be an attack on the Muggle Word, no doubt. Things were somewhat normal with Lucius. At least she knew him. She knew what to expect.

"Do you understand how serious it is?" Snape asked.

She needed to sit down. It was too much.

Shakily, she somehow made it to the bed and sat onto the edge of it, taking a few calming breaths.

Finally she found her voice, "Do you understand what you are doing?"

When he did not answer, she continued, "You are putting his life on my shoulders. It depends on me if he lives or dies. How is that fair?"

He was silent for a moment, before speaking, "Nobody said it would be easy, Miss Granger. The life of a spy never is."

What was happening to her? Why were her eyes burning? Were those tears? Why did she feel so...dead inside?

She extended her arm, "How much blood do you need?"

"Not much," he answered, pulling out his wand, "It will only hurt for a second."

Hermione could hardly feel the burning feeling as a small cut was made on the inside of her arm. She did not even flinch. All she could think about was that Lucius was probably going to die tomorrow.

What would happen then? What would happen to her? She could not even imagine the world without Lucius. She was not ready to lose him. Not yet. Not now. Just the thought of being alone in this word, made it seem as if all air just left the room.

Finally she could feel the cut being closed and Snape put the small bottle with her blood in his pocket. He did not speak, he simply stared at her.

"You don't have to say anything. I understand," she said quietly, "I-I would like to be alone now."

He was about to say something, but then decided against it as nodded and left the room.

Hermione felt physically ill. She did not want to be responsible for Lucius' life.

It was all too much.

ooo

She was awake the whole night. There was not a chance she would be able to even close her eyes. The stress was staring to show and her body was shaking uncontrollably. Keeping silent, she listened for any sign that he was awake.

There was only silence. For now.

It had to be early in the morning.

Biting her lip nervously, she decided to do something.

She needed to talk to him. What good could it do waiting in her room? She needed to take a risk. Slowly she walked over to the doors, then stopped, not sure what she was doing.

Then she took a deep breath and pulled at the handle, opening the doors. It did not surprise her that it was not locked. He had stopped locking her room a couple of days ago.

Trembling, she slowly stepped onto the hallway, turning towards the direction of his bedroom. She knew exactly where it was. For many months it was her bedroom too. When she finally reached the room, she did not allow herself to pause. Without thinking she opened the door and slipped in.

The room was dark, but she could still see everything. It was exactly as she remembered it. Nothing changed.

Then she noticed him.

He was sleeping peacefully on the four poster bed.

Hermione was almost too afraid to move closer, but then she forced herself to walk. Silently, she made it to the bed and then she took a moment to look at him. He was on his back, his chest revealed, the covers covering his lower half. She could not help but notice how...attractive he looked. Swallowing hard, she climbed into the bed with him, slowly not to wake him. She had no idea what she was doing, but at least she was doing something.

Perhaps she could - .

He was a man. She could try and...

But _could_ she? Would she be able to attempt that? And who was she to assume he would want to do anything with her? What if he got angry at her for coming into his room? Or worse? What if he laughed at her?

But she could not simply sit in her room and let him go to a meeting where he would get killed. That thought was even worse than the one with him laughing in her face.

Gathering her courage, she slipped her nightgown off, leaving her only in her knickers. Then she blushed furiously as she realized what she was doing. Was she really trying to seduce him? Did she even know how to do that?

His face looked so calm.

Slowly, Hermione moved closer to him, leaning in to kiss him. It felt strange and unnatural, but the second their lips met, it felt right. It felt familiar. Slowly she moved her lips and soon he was responding, his lips moving against hers. But then suddenly, she was pushed away and he pulled himself up in a sitting position, glaring at her, completely shocked. He blinked a few times as if he did not believe what he was seeing. Hermione crossed her arms over her chest and stared back at him, a bit breathless.

"What in the name of -" he did not finish the question, but the sheer surprise on his face was telling her everything.

"Lucius," she started.

"What are you doing here?" he demanded, then his eyes dropped to her body. She could see his face go from shocked to surprised, then slowly to something unreadable as he noticed her lack of clothes.

"Lucius, I can't keep pretending," she forced the words out.

"Pretending?"

"I-I want you," she could feel herself blushing at saying that, but she continued, "You were right in the study room. Before Patricia interrupted us. I would have let you do anything to me."

He was lost for words, he was still having trouble believing what was happening.

Hermione used that moment of his weakness to continue, "Please. I need you."

"You need me?"

He was not believing her, she could see it in his eyes. He was starting to suspect something.

Immediately an idea came to her, "I think it's the...baby. It's...controlling me. I don't understand why, but I'm burning up and I feel drawn to you."

His face relaxed at bit at that.

"It's powerful. Like when it threw you across the room," Hermione continued, "It's making me...want you."

Then she took a deep breath and forced her arms to move away from her chest, revealing herself to him. She kept her eyes on his face and noticed his mouth opened slightly and he was still completely speechless. It was the first time she saw him like this. Shocked, unprepared, almost _vulnerable_. And she was the one who caused that.

"Mudblood," he started slowly, "I do not know what you expect to achieve -"

Without thinking Hermione moved closer and kissed him again, this time pressing herself against him, wrapping her arms around his neck. She could feel he was unsure at first and he was not responding to her kisses. And just as she was about to pull away, thinking she had lost and he was refusing her, his arms suddenly wrapped around her body and he kissed her back hungrily.

She could feel something being lifted off her shoulders as he started responding to her. He was not laughing at her or sending her back into her room angrily.

Hermione shuddered against him as his tongue entered her mouth hungrily, questing, seeking. She opened to him answering his hunger, melting as he began to caress her body, his fingers moving over her curves.

Suddenly she was being pushed down onto the bed and he climbed over her, covering her body with his. Hermione opened her eyes and gasped as she realized he was not wearing anything. It was the first time she had seen that part of him. She never dared to look at it. It looked petrifying and...big. She quickly looked away when she noticed Lucius smirking at her.

"Impressed by what you see?" he asked, his voice husky.

Hermione simply looked at him, not saying anything. She was actually a bit afraid. It had been a while since the last time. And he was not..._small_.

She could not believe what she was thinking. Quickly pushing those thoughts away, she closed her eyes. Lucius leaned down, kissing her shoulder, making his way up to her neck.

"Do you want this?" he whispered in her ear.

That reminded Hermione that she was supposed to be seducing him, not the other way around. He could change his mind if she was not participating. She had to try at least.

Nodding, she forced herself to speak, "Show me how to please you."

He was surprised to hear her say that, but then he took her hand in his own and slowly brought it down to his manhood. By this point, Hermione was trembling uncontrollably. His eyes were looking deep into hers the whole time, while he showed her how to touch him. It was strange at first, but soon she was overwhelmed by the expression on his face. He was breathing heavily, his mouth parted in pleasure. She was the one who was making him breathless. And that realization gave her a strange feeling of...satisfaction.

His body fell onto her and as she felt his secure embrace, as she breathed in his warm scent, she forgot about how strange it should feel pleasuring Lucius Malfoy, and realized she didn't care. His hand was in her hair, his heartbeat rhythmic and soothing beside her ear.

She couldn't resist giving in.

Before she even realized what was happening, he was pulling her knickers down and a second later they were dropped onto the floor. He parted her legs and settled between them. She had to remind herself to breath, expecting the main event now. She was preparing herself for the possible pain, but then her eyes flew open at the shock of him touching her most secret place. His touch was slow and gentle and he was observing her face the whole time as if she was some sort of an experiment to him. She realized he enjoyed seeing different reactions on her face as his fingers moved and explored.

_Oh god._

She gasped, bucking up and almost breaking their contact. Lucius simply smirked at her and continued his stimulation.

"I knew you would come to me," he whispered, but Hermione could barely pay attention to his words.

Then he stopped and moved in between her legs. She could not open her eyes to look at him, she was completely overwhelmed with what he had made her feel.

And when she felt his thick, long organ rest again her belly, hot and throbbing, she couldn't speak, even though she wanted to say something. She needed to ask him to be careful, gentle. But no words came from her mouth.

She clutched the pillows behind her tightly, biting her lip rather roughly.

"Always mine," he breathed, pressing forward and sliding into her softness, his eyes fluttering as her body wrapped around his girth, accepting him as Hermione let out a cry as he claimed her body.

"_Oh god_," Lucius hissed and then held still, his face contorted as he reveled in her warmth and softness.

Hermione tensed, holding in her breath.

Lucius leaned down to her, his forehead against hers, breathless, "Relax," he whispered, "I cannot move if you do not relax."

Hermione nodded, she had not realized how tense she was. The nerves got the best of her. Gripping Lucius' shoulders she forced her body to relax and soon she could feel him moving inside of her. Her eyes flew open. It was not as bad as she was afraid it would be. Somehow he did fit. It was slightly uncomfortable, but nothing too painful. Yes, she was inexperienced, but she was taking him, _wanting_ him, accepting him as if made for him. As if they were made for each other.

His self control was slipping away, she could feel it. A moan escaped her lips at the thought that she was the one who made him lose control like this. Not even Patricia could do this to him.

By now she forgot about her mission, the Resistance, the meeting, Snape. All that mattered at that moment was that they were together.

ooo

She faced away from him and found her lungs beginning to slow down.

He was asleep, his body covered in sweat, exhausted.

Hermione felt so small in that large bed. She could not believe what she had done. It was afternoon already which meant she succeeded in making him stay in the Manor. Mission accomplished.

But at what cost?

She did not lie to herself, saying that she did not enjoy what happened between the two of them. _He_ made her enjoy it. And for some short period of time, she actually did not think about the problems she had. All she did was enjoy and _feel_.

But would she have came to him if she did not have to make him stay at the Manor?

No.

She would not.

And what did that make her?

Sleeping with a man to reach her goal? To get what she needed?

Silent tears formed in her eyes, but she did not brush them away. She did not move.

She felt dirty. There was something sticky that clung to the inside of her thighs and she was covered in sweat, but that was not the most horrible part. She felt dirty on the _inside_.

She had just used him. She used _herself_, her body.

There was such cold silence in the room.

At least she had saved him. Did he deserve it? Probably not.

He could have been dead by now. And she would have been left alone.

He would probably never find out, but she saved him.

She saved Lucius Malfoy.

But she lost a part of herself doing that.

**A/N: I want to thank all of you who read and those who review! You are the reason I write. :) It's a wonderful feeling knowing someone enjoys your story. Hope you all still like where the story's going. :) And as a response to one review I wanted to say that I do not see Lucius as a misunderstood man who is in fact good deep inside. The larger part of him is evil, but that does not mean he can't have his good moments. But I will not turn him into a good man. That would completely ruin his character. I am sorry if some of you don't agree with the way I write him, but that is my opinion of him. :) Tell me what you think**.


	13. The Power

chapter 13

**~ THE POWER ~**

Hermione did not move from the bed. She tried to make as little noise as possible, breathing as quietly as she could, not wanting to wake Lucius. The last thing she needed was to be faced with him. She could not look him in the eye. Not after what happened. She could not even look at herself.

She listened to his calm breathing, wishing she could find comfort in sleep as well. She could not even close her eyes. She always envied him; he was able to sleep no matter what was happening or what he had done. Did he even have conscience?

It was..._strange_.

Yes, they had been intimate before, but this time it felt different. It had been so long since the last time and being so close to him again felt... she could not even find the right word for it.

What had she done?

As the memories came back to her, she remembered Lucius' face, his eyes, his voice, his body shaking above hers. The realization that she was the one who made him lose control like that, felt _unreal_. The aristocratic Lucius Malfoy, a Pureblood, a Death Eater lost control over her, Hermione Granger, a Mudblood.

She shook her head, trying to push those memories out of her mind, but it was pointless. She could still clearly remember everything he did, everything she did to him.

She needed to take a bath to clean herself of...everything.

Slowly she pushed the covers off and rolled out of the bed, careful not to make any noise.

_Dirty. Dirty. Dirty._

The word played like a mantra in her head.

Looking around, she found her nightgown on the floor. Slipping it on quickly, she did not even waste her time looking for her knickers. All she wanted was to take a hot bath and rid herself of the dirt.

Then something made her stop. She approached the bed, looking at him.

Why did she feel like this simply by looking at him? Why did he have such an effect on her? Hermione had never before felt attracted to anyone. Not even to Ron. Was that what if felt like? Her heart beating like crazy, blood filling her cheeks, the feeling like her whole body was aching for him.

But that was _Lucius Malfoy._

Something was wrong with her. Very wrong. Even if she ignored the fact that he was a Death Eater, it was still wrong. Being attracted to someone so much older then her...it was not normal.

He was...a devil with an angelic face.

She snapped out of her thoughts, removing her eyes from his sleeping form, turned around and left the room quietly, hoping he would not wake up in a few hours.

ooo

As soon as she was in her bedroom, she pulled the nightgown over her head, throwing in on the floor and quickly entering the bedroom. As the tub filled itself with hot water, she tried to think of other things.

She should be glad, proud of herself.

She had succeeded. Her first mission for the Resistance was successful. She did what they asked her to.

_But they did not ask of you to sleep with him, Hermione._

_You are only trying to make it easier for yourself._

_There were other ways you could prevent him from leaving the Manor._

_You chose sleeping with him. Why?_

Hermione shook her head, arguing with herself.

_No. There was no other way._

_There was. You just did not want to see it._

_That's not true._

_It is._

_No._

_Yes._

Letting out an angry growl, she jumped into the bathtub, crying out as the burning water abused her skin. It burnt and it hurt, but Hermione made no move to get out. If this would get her feel a bit cleaner, then it was worth the pain.

She started scrubbing her skin, starting at her arms, then she washed her hands furiously, remembering what she did to him. She could not believe she had touched him _there_. What had become of her? Where did she get the courage?

She continued scrubbing her skin until it was all red. Then she noticed a small bite on her left shoulder. When did he -? She could not even remember him biting her. But then again, neither of them would notice if the Manor was on fire, they were so lost in...what? Passion? _Pleasure_?

She spent several minutes scrubbing at her thighs, anxious to get every reminder of him off of her. She could see hand prints starting to form on her hips and it disgusted her that she would have to look at it for a couple of days until they disappeared.

Without realizing it she suddenly burst into hysterical crying.

Why was she feeling guilty?

Was it because it was _her_ who sought him out? It was _her_ who came seeking him. Was it because she actually did not have any reason to be angry at him? The only person she had a right to be angry at was herself. He did not hurt her, he was not rough with her, he actually made her feel _good_. Why did she allow him to do that?

She was disgusting.

Her face was completely red and swollen as she finally got out of the bathtub. Wrapping a tower around her body, she caught glimpse of herself in the mirror and it made her sick.

She wanted to be that old Hermione Granger again. The know-it-all, the brightest witch of her age. If she could only go back in time and change things.

Realizing it was pointless to think about it, she left the bathroom. She was so tired and sore, the last day was horrible, she could not remember the last time she was under such stress. She walked over to her bed, starting to unwrap the towel from her body.

"Why did you leave?"

The voice cut through her like a knife and she let out a short scream, turning around to face him.

"L-Lucius," she stammered, fixing the towel around her body.

He raised his eyebrows, waiting for the answer.

Cold and uncomfortable silence filled the room. Hermione did not know what to say, she did not want to face him so soon after. So she simply stood there, looking back at him.

It did not escape her attention that he was wearing only a long dark green robe that left his chest exposed. Quickly averting her eyes, she took a deep calming breath. She did not want to look at his body, she had seen enough of it for a lifetime.

"Were you..._crying_?" he asked, surprised.

Her first instinct was to shake her head 'no', but she did not have the energy to lie to him.

"Why?" he asked.

He did not understand. He could never understand.

"Is is because of what happened?" he pressed further.

Hermione took a deep breath, then met his eyes.

"Mudblood -" he started.

"Hermione," she said quietly.

"Excuse me?"

"Hermione," she repeated, stronger this time, "Is it too much of me to ask to call me Hermione? Please. Just this once."

He simply glared at her, uncomfortable.

"Please," she repeated, her eyes pleading.

He looked away, clearing is throat, "I demand an explanation."

Hermione could feel tears in her eyes again. He could not bring himself to call her Hermione. Not even after what had happened between the two of them. Not even when she was carrying _his_ child. He was disgusted with her. And he was right. She was not _Hermione_ anymore. She could not even recognize herself.

"Why did you come to my room?" he demanded.

"Why do you want to know now? You could have asked me that question then."

He smirked slightly, "I was a bit...preoccupied at that moment. You wake me up, undress yourself and practically throw yourself at me. Every man would find it hard to concentrate."

Hermione blushed furiously, but did not answer. She did not need him to remind her of how she behaved.

"Tell me."

"I can't."

"Why not?"

She remained silent.

Lucius took a deep breath, "Why do you always make things harder for yourself?"

"What?" she looked up at him.

"You enjoyed it, you _wanted_ to be there with me. Why cannot you admit it?"

"Stop it."

"You moaned in pleasure at my touch."

"_Stop_."

"You wanted me - "

"STOP IT!"

A hand covered her mouth as tears formed in her eyes again.

"Why is that so wrong, Mudblood?" he asked, his voice cold.

"Because you are _Lucius Malfoy,_ you are evil."

He nodded, "And what makes me _evil_?"

She looked up at him, surprised, "You _kill_ people, you are a Death Eater, you hurt people -"

"But not you," he cut her off.

"W-What?"

His face darkened as he spoke, "I do not hurt you."

"Lucius..."

He simply glared at her, waiting as she collected her thoughts.

"I know what is happening here," she admitted, angrily brushing the tears away from her face.

"Do you? Enlighten me," he drawled.

"It's because of the...this _thing_ that's growing inside of me," she forced out, disgusted.

His whole body tensed, it was obvious that was a subject he did not wish to talk about. But she did not care. She was going to talk about it and if he did not want to hear it he could leave the room.

"You've been acting differently, I've noticed it. Regular meals, new clothes, different attitude," she spoke, "When was the last time you hit me? Or tortured me? Or -"

Anger flashed in his eyes, "You want me to hit you?"

"No," she shook her head, "And that's not the point! The point is that this is not you."

"And how would you know what I'm like? You spend a few months with me and you think you know me," he spat, glaring at her.

"You torture. You kill. You enjoy causing pain to people who, by your standards, do not deserve to live in this world. That is you," she finished, her voice tired and weak.

She could see she had upset him, he was breathing heavy, seething with anger.

When he finally spoke it was slowly and controlled, "I only wish to know why you came to my room. Answer _that_ question."

Hermione became nervous, her heart beating faster, but she still remembered her story and decided to stick with it.

"I told you already," she answered quietly.

"Tell me again."

Taking a deep breath, she started, "It's probably because of _it_. I couldn't sleep, I was...hot and...I felt drawn to you. Like being close to you would help ease the...feeling," she hoped she was convincing.

Lucius stared at her for a few long moments, lost in his thoughts and Hermione tried hard not to break under his gaze. Finally he nodded and approached her slowly.

"You are too innocent for your own good," he spoke quietly, looking down at her.

"W-What do you mean?"

The corner of his lips twisted up in a smirk, "I know what that feeling was and it had nothing to do with...that thing that you're carrying. That _need_ came from you, not from _it_."

Hermione remained silent, but she could feel her temperature rising with him standing so close to her.

"You are attracted to me," he drawled, "And taking into the account that...you are in a very hormonal stage of your life, it is perfectly understandable that you would feel drawn to me."

"That's not true," she said, even though his theory did not seem so unbelivable to her. Not that she would ever admit it to him.

He spoke, barely above a whisper, "You liked having me inside of you, did you not? I gave you pleasure you never imagined existed."

She shivered at his words, a bit breathless even though she tried to hide it. Why did he have such an effect on her?

He was silent, waiting for her to respond and after a few long moments she finally gathered her thoughts.

She shook her head, "It's because of _it_. Once we get rid of it, everything will be simple as before. Everything will be more clear."

Lucius looked at her amused, then his expression turned serious, "It was _never_ simple, Mudblood. Not even at the beginning. Things were never _clear_ between the two of us."

Hermione opened her mouth to speak, but was interrupted by noise coming from the hallway. They both turned towards the door, listening.

"_Master_?"

It was the house elf.

Lucius rolled his eyes and walked towards the door, opening it.

"What is it?"

The small creature stood there, nervous. At first it's big eyes seemed surprised at seeing his Master and Hermione in the same room this early in the morning.

"Well?" Lucius asked impatiently.

"T-There are people downstairs, Master," it answered.

"What people?"

"They say they came to see you, Master. Master Snape is also here."

Hermione tensed at hearing that. It was probably because Lucius did not go to the meeting as he was supposed to. The ones who did go were probably killed by now. Did they come to tell Lucius about that?

She tried to keep an emotionless face as Lucius turned to her, "We will continue this," with those words he left, closing and _locking_ the doors behind him.

She stood there for a few long minutes, simply thinking, wondering what was happening downstairs. It annoyed her that she was so in the dark about everything.

ooo

As hours went by, Hermione was getting more and more impatient. She needed to know what was happening. At first she heard voices and it seemed as if they were arguing but for almost half an hour everything was quiet.

She wanted to know what had happened at the meeting. Did everything go as planned? And she could not just ask Lucius to tell her about it. She needed Snape.

Looking down at her bracelet, she almost made a move to call for him, but then stopped herself. She could not bother him, what if he was in the middle of something important? But then again, if _she_ had sacrificed so much to keep Lucius in the Manor, then Snape could take a few minutes of his precious time to tell her what was happening.

With a deep breath she rubbed the small stone on her bracelet and then waited.

ooo

No one came.

She was starting to get worried.

Pacing up and down the room, she could not help but wonder if something was wrong. Perhaps not everything went as planned. Perhaps the Death Eaters were not killed and her sleeping with Lucius did no good.

_No_.

She could not even think about that.

ooo

And just as she was about to completely lose her mind, she heard steps. Someone was walking towards her room.

She prepared herself for Lucius, forcing all the emotions away.

But then someone else entered the room.

_Severus Snape._

Hermione looked at him in surprise, then opened her mouth to speak, but decided against it. She was not sure if it was safe to talk.

But then he closed the doors behind him and nodded, "We are alone."

Not losing her time, she attacked him with questions, "What took you so long? Where is Lucius? Did everything go as planned? What happened?"

She noticed the slight content smile on his face, but it disapeared as soon as it showed, "It all went as planned, Miss Granger. The Death Eaters were eliminated. We are one step closer to our goal."

A sigh of relief escaped her. It was not pointless after all.

"Good," she nodded.

"You succeeded," he said, "For that I must thank you."

Hermione tried to smile, but she failed, "There is no need for that."

He seemed skeptical as he next spoke, "I will not ask about details, Miss Granger."

"Good," she said, looking down.

She did not want to talk to him about what she had done, though she had a strange feeling he already knew. Or at least suspected it.

"But you must know that every sacrifice will pay off in the end," he said.

She met his eyes again, but did not comment. She did not agree with him. Sometimes you lose things you can never get back. And it does _not_ pay off in the end.

"How come you are here alone?" she asked, changing the subject.

"I was in the middle of the meeting when I received your call. You understand I could not just leave, I had to wait until it ended."

She nodded, waiting for him to continue.

"I used...Ginevra to get a few minutes with you."

Hermione blinked at him, "W-What do you mean?"

His face turned serious as he spoke, "There had been an incident a few days ago with her."

"What incident?" she was starting to get worried. She had not seen the younger witch for a few months and they did not actually get along, but she still cared about her.

"There have been a few changes you may or may not know about," he spoke, "Have you heard about the Marriage law?"

Hermione quickly nodded, "Yes, Ginny told me. If a reward is a Pureblood the owner must marry - " then she realized what he was trying to say, "Did you two...marry?"

He nodded, visibly uncomfortable.

Hermione gasped, not believing it. It was too disturbing to even think about it.

"About a month ago," he explained, "And she still had not come to terms with it."

"What happened?" she had a feeling that the marriage was not the worst part.

He took a deep breath as if to prepare himself, "She had tried to end her own life about a week ago."

"W-What? _Again_?" Hermione could imagine what the younger witch was going through if suicide was the only solution on her mind.

"Yes. Luckily I found her before she succeeded, but I have not saved her. I cannot even leave her alone, if I do I have to put anti-suicide spells on her."

"Oh god," Hermione shook her head, "I-I need to see her."

"That is exactly the reason I came here. I have asked Lucius if perhaps he would allow you to see Ginevra."

"What did he say?"

"You can imagine he is not exactly inclined to the idea, especially since Ginevra had tried to kill him, but for some strange reason he allowed it."

Hermione could not hide the surprise on her face, "He did?"

"There will be a...party this evening."

"A _party_?"

"Every Death Eater on a high position is invited as is their wife or their slave."

"There was an attack this morning and people died...and they are having a _party_ this evening?" she could not believe it.

"The date for the party has been decided for a while now and they do not want to postpone it," Snape explained, "Also it will be a good place for all of them to come together, comment on what had happened and decide on their next move."

Hermione nodded, "Where?"

"Here. Lucius is hosting it."

"Of course he is," she said quietly.

"Ginevra and I will come half an hour earlier, giving the two of you some time to talk before the party begins."

Hermione shook her head, "Wait. She had tried to kill herself not a week ago and you are dragging her to a party?"

His eyes turned hard, "It is not my choice. She must be at the party if we do not want to raise suspicions."

"What about me?" she asked, "Will I have to be there?"

"I do not know, perhaps. Lucius has not told me anything yet."

She nodded, feeling a bit nervous again. She did not want to go to that party. It always ended bad for her. And what good could it come from a bunch of Death Eaters together?

"Soon you will receive a new task," Snape cut through the silence, "It has something to do with a man named Richard Madwill. We still haven't decided what to do with him, but when we do you will be the first to know."

"A-Alright, but who is he?"

"A very influential man. He has tried to make Lucius attack the Muggle World. For some unknown reason Lucius is still holding back the attack, but we cannot have that man messing up with our plans."

"_The promise_," Hermione said to herself.

Was he still holding the promise he gave her about not attacking the Muggle World? Why would he? Perhaps she was giving him too much credit and the reason he was holding back the attack had nothing to do with her. Still...she wondered.

"Excuse me?" Snape asked.

"N-Nothing. So...Richard Madwill?"

"Yes. Keep an eye out for him if you will be attending the party," Snape instructed.

"Alright."

"I better return now," Snape said and a moment later he was gone.

ooo

The evening came faster than Hermione expected. When she heard the steps this time, she knew it was Lucius. Somehow she still remembered the way he walked, the noise his boots made. It was all left over from the times when she was blind and had to rely on other senses.

The first thing she noticed as he entered the room, was the serious expression on his face. She knew the reason for his bad mood, but had to pretend she knew nothing.

"Severus probably told you about the party," he spoke and even his voice was dark.

"Yes, he did."

He nodded, then threw an ugly grey material on the bed, "Put that on."

"I will be attending?" she asked in surprise.

"You have to," he answered, then added, "And watch your behavior. Many people will be watching you. _Us_. They need to see you as my _slave_. That means no _talking back_."

Hermione tensed, biting her tongue.

"Also you will call me _'Master_."

"What?" the words escaped her mouth, "That is ridiculous!"

"_Ridiculous_ or _not_," he drawled, "you _will_ obey if you are smart. I do not want any rumors that I am incapable of controlling my reward. There have been enough rumors already."

Hermione kept her opinion to herself and instead looked at the ugly grey robe that she will have to wear.

"There will be insults, but you are not to react in any way. Is that understood?" he demanded.

"All of this simply because my blood is not pure?" Hermione asked, "If I were a Pureblood then things would be a lot different. I would go to the party as your _wife_, right?"

That last sentence took him by surprise and his jaw twitched, but he quickly composed himself, "I am not in the mood for these kind of conversations," then he pointed towards the robe, "Change. Severus and his wife had already arrived."

Hermione took the robe in her hands, then nervously looked at him. Realizing he was not going anywhere, she quickly walked in the bathroom, closing the doors behind her. She could hear Lucius let out an annoyed sigh, but she did not care. He had no right to demand she had to change in front of him.

Quickly slipping the robe on, she grimaced at her reflection in the mirror. The robe was ugly and grey and it revealed more that she would have wanted. It ended above her knees and it was sleeveless, revealing all her scars and the recent bite mark on her left shoulder. She quickly covered it with her hair, hoping no one would notice.

When she left the bathroom, Lucius was already impatiently tapping his feet.

"I'm ready," she said.

He looked at her for a long moment, then nodded, "The study room."

ooo

Neither of them spoke as they made their way downstairs. Hermione walked in front of him and for some reason she felt like a prisoner being accompanied by a guard. Finally they reached the study room.

Snape was standing outside and when he noticed them approaching, he cleared his throat, "Granger."

"Is she in?" Hermione asked, feeling a bit nervous at seeing Ginny again.

Snape nodded, "Half an hour, right, Lucius?"

"Yes and tell your friend not to try anything _stupid_. We will be standing here the whole time," Lucius warned her.

Hermione took a deep breath and walked in the study room, closing the doors behind her.

Quickly she noticed a figure standing in the corner of room.

_Ginny._

Hermione could not believe how much she'd changed. Her hair was longer, almost reaching her waist, but it was not so red anymore. She was wearing a long blue dress, it was quite revealing and Hermione immediately knew the dress was not chosen by Ginny herself.

The younger witch seemed in shock. She simply stood there, staring at Hermione, her chest heaving.

Hermione could not help but notice how skinny she looked, it was unhealthy.

"H-Hermione?"

"Ginny, it's me," Hermione tried to smile, but it was a sad smile.

"Oh god, is it really you?"

Hermione nodded and slowly approached her, not sure of how the other witch will react to her presence. The last time they had seen each other, they had a huge fight.

But it seemed as if all of that was forgotten as Ginny quickly threw her arms around Hermione, hugging her, "I can't believe it's really you!"

"It's me," Hermione hugged her back, trying to ignore how she could feel her friend's bones through all the material.

When they finally broke the hug, Ginny could not look away from Hermione, "They didn't tell me...I didn't know it'll be you."

"You didn't know?"

She quickly shook her head, "N-No. I thought you weren't here anymore. S-Snape told me you escaped."

"I did, I just...I came back," Hermione knew how dumb it sounded, "Here, let us sit down."

Once they were seated, Hermione took a deep breath, "It's complicated, Ginny."

"We have time," the witch said, "Please...tell me what happened to you."

"I did leave...he let me leave, but now I'm back."

"W-Why? You were free," Ginny could not believe her friend's words.

"I was not free," Hermione admitted quietly, "Somehow it was worse then when I was here."

"But how did you come back?"

"I was...contacted by the Resistance. They needed my help, but then I was caught and here I am."

She did not like lying to Ginny, but it was safer if she knew nothing.

"The _Resistance_? It truly exists?" Ginny's eyes widened in shock.

"Yes," Hermione smiled, hoping that would give the redhead some hope, "And I believe everything will be alright someday. We just have to believe, Ginny."

The younger witch said nothing to that and Hermione took her hands, "Ginny, why did you try to kill yourself again?"

Tears formed in Ginny's eyes at that question, "You don't know what's happened."

"I do. The marriage?"

"Yes, the marriage and everything that goes with it."

Hermione blood ran cold at that, she had not even thought of it, "Ginny -?"

"I didn't want to become his wife and that meant I'd be killed. I was alright with that, but _he_...he would have none of it. He said he will not watch me give up my life and we...got married."

Hermione listened, her heart breaking, "Ginny -"

"The wedding night was the worst. It...it had to be done and I refused," Ginny spoke through her tears, then let out a short laugh, "I regretted not sleeping with Harry before...all of this."

Hermione could feel her throat close up with disgust. She could not imagine how horrible sleeping with your Professor had to be. It was even worse than sleeping with Lucius. At least she did not know him so well. But Ginny had known Snape ever since she was a child. That was harder.

Ginny took a deep breath, "It didn't matter that I didn't want to do it. _He_ did all the work. After it was done, I spent hours in the bathroom, throwing up."

"Ginny, I'm so sorry," Hermione whispered.

"Don't be. This is the way our lives are now. And feeling sorry won't change that," then she added, "That's why I want to end it. And I'll finally be free. But _he_ doesn't let me."

"You can't think like that."

Ginny looked at Hermione, surprised, "You are still...strong. Still hoping. How do you do it?"

"Things are not as horrible as they used to be, Ginny," she admitted.

"I can see that," the younger witch looked at her, "You look good. Healthy."

"And you would too if you started to take care of yourself, Ginny. You are too skinny, too pale."

"The food is the last thing on my mind. And..."

"And what?"

Disgust showed on Ginny's face as she spoke, "They want us to have...children. No contraceptives are allowed. And as long as I'm _unhealthy_, skin and bones, then my body won't be able to..."

"Oh Ginny," Hermione wished she could offer her comfort, tell her the truth about Snape and about the Resistance, but she was not allowed to. All she could do was listen to her and tell her that somehow someday it will all work out.

"And now this _party_," Ginny sighed, shaking her head, "It's _disgusting_. The way they talk about killing people, torturing, like it's a completely normal thing."

"For them it is."

"Will...will you be attending too?"

Hermione nodded, "Yes, I have to."

Ginny's eyes lit up with worry, "_Hermione_..."

"W-What is it?"

"I've been to a lot of parties like this. The...non-pureblood rewards are...humiliated. They treat them like dirt. Everyone does."

Hermione could not say she was not worried, but for some stupid reason she trusted Lucius. She trusted him to step in and protect her when needed. But she could not tell that to Ginny.

"I-I can take care of myself, Ginny. Don't worry. I've been through worse."

"But - "

Suddenly the door opened and both girls looked surprised as Snape and Lucius entered.

"I am sorry, ladies, but we have to cut this visit short, the guests are already arriving," Lucius drawled innocently.

Ginny stood up, "But you said_ half an hour_!"

"My sincerest apologies, _Mrs. Snape_," Lucius said sarcastically, "But as I said, the guests are arriving."

"Ginevra, come," Snape stepped in, reaching his hand out for her.

Ginny looked at Hermione helplessly, then back at the men, her eyes furious.

Hermione stood up as well, "Ginny, it's alright, we'll see each other again, I promise."

She noticed Lucius raised an eyebrow at her promise, but he did not comment.

"Take care, Hermione," Ginny smiled weakly, before walking over to Snape.

"Mudblood," Lucius called for her and Hermione approached him, anger on her face. She could handle with him calling her _Mudblood_ in private, but when he did it in front of others it humiliated her even more.

Snape and Ginny left the room with Hermione and Lucius following slowly.

"Watch how you behave," Lucius warned her again, but Hermione simply looked away from him.

ooo

The room was _large_.

Hermione had never seen it before. It seemed as if it was made for hosting parties. There were a lot of people there, they were talking, drinking champagne. _Purebloods_.

As she quickly looked around, she noticed there were at least six other slaves. She recognized them by their robe which was exactly like hers. The only difference was that they looked much, _much_ worse than her. Did she look like that the first few weeks of her capture?

Lucius leaned closer to her and whispered into her ear, "Do not make eye contact, do not talk and always stand one step behind me."

Hermione could feel herself burning with rage, but somehow she forced herself to nod.

"Follow me," he ordered.

The next few minutes were a pure torture for Hermione. She could not believe how they acted like such high society when in fact they were murderers and sociopaths. It made her sick.

"William, how nice of you to come," Lucius greeted the man in front of him, then his attention turned towards the woman, probably his wife, "We haven't seen each other in quite some time."

Hermione tuned out, ignoring their conversation and looking around, observing other slaves. Not one did raise their head and look at her, they were trained good.

"So this is the Mudblood?"

Her head snapped up at that question and she met the man's eyes before quickly turning her head down, realizing her mistake.

"Yes. Harry Potter's closest friend, the part of the Golden Trio," Lucius spoke, proud that he owned something that was so important to the-boy-who-lived.

"Have you trained her well? She seems a bit -"

"William," suddenly Snape and Ginny approached them, interrupting the conversation.

Hermione and Ginny exchanged encouraging glances.

"Finally I meet Mrs. Snape," William spoke elegantly, pressing a light kiss on Ginny' hand.

"It's nice to meet you, sir," Ginny said and her voice seemed cold, like a robot.

"_Weasley_, right?" the man asked, "Such a pity your family could not agree with us and see that our cause is the right way."

Hermione could see Ginny's whole body tensed and a breath caught in her throat, but the younger witch remained silent.

"I heard you were a big family. Your father worked at the Ministry, right?" the man insisted with his questions.

Even Hermione was shaking with rage by now and suddenly she felt Lucius' hand on her wrist, warning her. Was she that obvious?

"Y-Yes, he did," Ginny answered, her voice shaking.

"Yes," the man nodded, "What a shame that he lost his life for such unworthy creatures."

When he said that, Hermone could not help but look at him and she realized that he was staring right at her. She knew she should look away, bow her head, but her body would not move. Instead she stood there, glaring at the man, her eyes full of hate. She did not care if everyone noticed.

"Dear Lucius," William spoke, still not looking away from Hermione, "It seems you have not trained her well."

Hermione could see Lucius in the corner of her eye.

He tensed up, "I apologize for that, William. She had spent the last two months in the Muggle World, you will have to forgive her."

Suddenly he grabbed her arm roughly and Hermione cried out, breaking her eye contact with William.

"Apologize," Lucius ordered coldly.

"W-What?"

He tightened his grip on her arm and she seriously thought her arm would break, "_Apologize_."

"I-I-I apologize for my behavior," she quickly forced out and Lucius finally released her arm.

Hermione bit her tongue to keep her whimpers of pain inside and fixed her gaze on a spot on the floor.

The conversation went on and Hermione decided the best would be if she tried to ignore what they were talking about.

"I need a drink," Ginny said to Snape and walked away from them.

Some Death Eater turned to Snape and smirked, "You have done a good job, Severus. I remember her from a few months ago, she could not keep her mouth shut. How did you do it?"

"Well, let just say I preoccupied her mouth with something other than talking," Snape answered coldly.

Hermione could literally feel her stomach turn at that comment. She did not want to hear such things.

A few moments later Lucius looked at Snape, "I will be back in a minute. Watch over her."

"Of course."

When Lucius and William walked away, Snape approached Hermione, "What are you doing?"

"What do you mean?" she asked quietly.

"Be smart, Granger. Do not react to anything they say."

"That's easy for you to say. They are not insulting _you_," she hissed back, looking down.

Snape took a deep breath, "How did your conversation with Ginevra go?"

"_Excellent_," she answered, "I learned a whole lot."

"Do I sense bitterness in your tone?"

"You bet you do, _Professor_," she forced her voice to remain quiet.

"What are you trying to say, Granger?"

"With all the stories you've told me, you forgot to mention that you're raping her," she accused him, disgust showing on her face.

He tensed, "Is that what she told you?"

"Are you denying it?"

Before he could answer, Lucius returned, "We have a few guests to greet, follow me, Mudblood."

She was thankful that she did not have to stay with Snape anymore. After everything she'd heard from Ginny, she was not so sure how she felt about him. What he was doing was wrong and disgusting, even if he did want to save Ginny's life.

The next half an hour was filled with boring conversations and insults regarding the Muggleborns. Hermione could hear her heart beating loudly as if it was about to jump out of her ribcage, but she somehow forced herself to ignore everything. Sometimes it seemed as if they were insulting her on purpose, like they _wanted_ her to react, to explode, but Hermione did not give them the pleasure.

Then as Lucius greeted another man, she froze.

"Richard, I am glad you could come."

"I would not miss it for the world, Lucius. We have plenty to discuss."

Richard. _Richard Madwill?_

Hermione dared to look up for a second, realizing he was a forty-something, bald and with mustaches. She quickly looked down before he could catch her staring at him.

Another three men joined the conversation and it was easy for Hermione to ignore them. The topics were boring, something about the Ministry and some things she did not understand. Then she felt the man to her right move slightly closer to her. It made her feel uncomfortable, but she did nothing, not wanting to raise attention.

Then she felt his hand on her back and she tensed up, her whole body going numb. What was he doing? She threw a quick glance at him and noticed he was staring back at her, smirking slightly. He had to be forty as well and he was _disgusting_.

She shifted, uncomfortably, but his hand did not go away, if anything it started to move lower and lower. A small gasp escaped her when his hand stopped on her arse. She could not believe what was happening. What was she supposed to do? Her first instinct was to push his hand away and slap him across the face, but she was not allowed to do that. It would put her and Lucius in trouble.

_Lucius._

She looked up at him, hoping he would notice, but he was not paying attention to her. He was too lost in the conversation with that Richard.

Hermione took a deep breath and stepped away from her attacker, but he followed, moving with her. She could not believe him.

Ginny had warned her about such things. These kind of things happen to slaves.

After a few moments, Hermione could no longer take it. Either he removed his hand of she would break it for him. Then something accurred to her. She covered her mouth with her hand and coughed loudly, still keeping her eyes on the floor. The man immediately removed his hand from her. She could see everyone looked at her, especially Lucius. Perhaps he could tell she was pretending?

After a few moments, he continued the conversation. But the man next to Hermione did not even try to touch her again, he probably got her message.

"...the Muggle World."

Hermione caught the words and listened carefully.

Lucius shook his head, "Not now, Richard. We have enough problems as it is. You have seen what happened this morning."

"Exactly. We need to expand out control. When we are more powerful, no one will be foolish enough to attack us."

"I agree with you, but it is not the best time," Lucius insisted.

"I cannot wait to show those Muggles our power. They will be hunted like animals. Nothing will be able to save them."

Hermione could feel anger rising inside of her. Her head was almost burning and it felt like it was about to explode.

"Unworthy. Pathetic," Richard continued, "We will hunt them like they had hunted us and we will take great pleasure in it."

_Rage._

Hermione was shaking by this point.

"Especially the ones who were able to create a _magical_ child. They are a _disgrace_. I myself will be glad to rid the world of those _dirty animals."_

_Fire_.

There was actually fire inside of Hermione. Her hands were burning. Her body was shaking and it felt like something was closing her throat up. Soon breathing became a problem.

"Kill them all."

Suddenly something inside of her exploded.

And then something _actually_ exploded and everyone gasped.

Hermione flinched as some kind of liquid spilled over her.

"What the -?" Richard demanded.

Hermione looked up to see what happened. Richard stood there, covered in champagne, his face shocked. The glass he had been holding had exploded, sending thousand of little shreds all around.

Hermione could not believe it.

She turned to look at Lucius and he was already glaring at her, panic and anger on his face. He was practically accusing her with his eyes. But why? Was she really the one who did it?

"I apologize, Richard, the glass was probably not the best quality, I will punish the elf severely for buying it," Lucius spoke, then added, "Excuse me."

He grabbed Hermione again and dragged her across the room until they were away from all the people.

"What the hell are you doing?" he demanded.

"N-Nothing!"

"What happened a minute ago, was not _nothing_, it was definitely _something_," he barked at her.

"It wasn't me, I couldn't - "

"And _it_?" Lucius asked, his eyes dropping to her stomach.

Hermione let out a shaky breath, "I don't know."

"Alright," Lucius sighed, "I do not have the time for this. Let's try to spend the rest of the evening without further incidents, is that understood?"

Hermione quickly nodded, "Yes."

And then he dragged her back to the party. But Hermione was not so sure that was a good idea. Obviously something was happening to her, something she was unable to control. It could happen _anywhere_, _anytime_. And it was not so smart bringing her into a room full of Death Eaters with a power she could not control. It was going to be a long night.

**A/N: This update came faster than I expected! I just could not stop writing. :) A big thank you to all the lovely readers and reviewers. You guys motivate me and you are the reason this chapter is up so soon! Thank you!**


	14. Chapter 14

**~ chapter 14 ~**

The party seemed to drag into eternity.

Hermione tried her best to obey Lucius, not because of him, but because she did not want to get into trouble. The last thing she needed was to explode again and draw even more attention to herself and Lucius. It was time she started to listen to Snape and take his advices seriously. No matter how much she disliked him at the moment because of his behavior towards Ginny, she had to admit he was right. She needed to use her mind and listen to reason instead of her heart. Even though there were situations where she could not shut her emotions off, she would simply had to force herself to do so, there was no other option.

As she walked beside Lucius, her head down, she could not help but feel like his dog. No one even acknowledged her, Lucius completely ignored her, except throwing her a warning look every now and then.

He was tensed, she could see it. The incident with Richard Madwill will not pass without questions and suspicions, she was sure of it.

As Lucius participated in a polite, yet boring conversation with two other men, Hermione allowed herself to look around carefully. There was so many people, all Death Eaters. She could not believe they were all evil, full of prejudices when they seemed so _educated_. Her eyes fell upon Ginny at the other side of the room. The younger witch was alone, with a glass of champagne in her hand. Hermione had a feeling it was not her first glass. And certainly not her last.

Then she noticed Snape approaching Ginny, trying to take the drink away from her. The witch refused, saying something to him. By the look on Snape's face, her words were not nice. Snape said something back to her, but she simply shook her head, quickly drinking the whole champagne, handing Snape the empty glass and walking away, leaving him alone. He sighed then his eyes met Hermione's for a second before she quickly looked away, breaking their contact.

She was angry at him. She did not want to see him, to talk to him, to _look_ at him.

Then horrible scream filled the room and Hermione's blood went cold at the sheer pain in the voice.

Everyone went quiet and turned to look in the direction the scream came from.

There was a young boy, probably the same age as Hermione, curled on the floor, his body twisting violently, horrible screams escaping his mouth. Older man stood above him, his wand pointed at the boy.

Hermione's whole body went numb as she watched the scene, completely shocked, yet unable to look away.

The boy was a slave, just like her, as he was wearing the same ugly robe as she was.

Everyone stood silent as the torture continued, some were sneering, some simply observed without any kind of emotion on their face.

"What is happening?" Hermione whispered, looking up at Lucius.

He did not answer, but his eyes moved from the slave to something small laying on the floor, not away from him. Hermione narrowed her eyes, trying to see what that was.

Her throat closed up as she recognized it.

_A muffin._

_Small chocolate muffin._

"Was he trying to steal it?" she asked, her voice shaking.

Lucius nodded, "And he got caught," he answered quietly.

Hermione could not look away from the poor boy, he seemed so small and skinny and she feared his bones might break if the curse was not lifted soon.

Screams continued.

"_D-Do something_," she whispered to Lucius, who simply stood there, observing the scene, emotionless.

He did not react to her words.

"Lucius, do something!" she repeated, her voice stronger.

"I am not allowed to," he spoke through his teeth, "That slave is no business of mine."

"But this is _your_ house," Hermione insisted, "He'll kill him!"

She swallowed hard, turning her head away and trying to ignore what was happening, what she was hearing.

"He will stop in time," Lucius said quietly.

Hermione started to feel sick and light headed. How could everyone listen to those cries and do nothing?

_Monsters_.

Finally it stopped.

Silence filled the room for a few moments and then everyone went on as if nothing had happened. Conversations and laughter could be heard again as if everything was perfectly normal. As if horrible torture did not just happen before their very eyes.

Hermione tried to find the tortured boy again, but he was nowhere to be seen. He and his Master disappeared.

"Lucius, how nice to see you again."

Hermione's head snapped up at that voice.

It was Anton.

He was standing next to her and Lucius, smirking proudly.

"What are _you_ doing here?" Lucius' voice came out as a growl, "I do not remember inviting your sort."

"Oh, the party was for all Death Eaters and I thought - "

"You thought wrong."

Hermione could not help but notice Anton was mostly looking at her as he spoke and she was looking back, unable to break their contact.

"Leave," Lucius demanded.

"Are you throwing me out?" Anton asked with false hurt.

"I am doing no such thing. I am simply asking you to leave," Lucius corrected.

"I see."

Then his eyes landed on Hermione again, "And what about you, Hermione? Would _you_ like me to leave?"

It surprised her that he used her name. She rarely heard it and it felt strange to her.

"She does not have a say in this," Lucius replied calmly.

Hermione bit her tongue in annoyance, but remained silent.

"Alright," Anton nodded, "As you wish," then his attention fell upon Hermione again, "Until next time."

With those words he turned and left, disappearing in the crowd.

Lucius snorted in disgust, his lips forming a neutral line, but his eyes burned with rage.

Hermione decided the smart thing would be to remain silent, not commenting on anything that happened. All she wanted was for the evening to pass as soon as possible.

Suddenly Snape approached them, "Lucius, it was an interesting evening, but I have to call it a night."

"I understand," Lucius replied, then looked past Snape, "Your wife does not seem so good."

Hermione noticed Ginny was standing across the room, leaning against the wall for support, her eyes barely open.

Lucius looked at Snape again, his eyebrow raised in amusement, "Had one too many drinks, I suppose?"

Snape sighed tiredly, then nodded, "We better leave now before she embarrasses herself further."

"I understand."

Hermione deliberately refused to look at Snape, keeping her eyes down. If she were to look at him, she would not be able to hide the disgust on her face.

After a few more polite exchanges, Snape excused himself and walked over to Ginny, grabbing her arm and leading her out of the room.

"I am tired," Hermione said quietly, "When will this be over?"

"When it is," was his only answer and before she could reply, they were approached by another two men.

Hermione ignored their conversation until she heard the word _Mudblood_.

"We were worried about you, Lucius," the first man said, "The rumors were - "

"False," Lucius finished, "There were many people who wanted to take over my position. They were the ones who started these false rumors."

"I see," the man nodded, "If I understand correctly, you have no problems with this Mudblood?"

"None at all."

"Girl," the man said, looking at Hermione, "Would you agree with that?"

Hermione was not sure of how to behave. Was she allowed to look up?

Finally she decided to keep her head down as she answered, "The Master is telling the truth. _Sir_."

She felt so humiliated, but she knew she had to play along. For her own safety.

"Yes, yes, only time will show," the man replied, "Well, excuse me, Lucius, I have to find my wife."

"Of course."

Once they were alone again, Lucius leaned to her, "Well played, Mudblood."

Just as she was about to reply, her blood ran cold at the sight of a woman standing not far away, drinking champagne and observing them with malice in her eyes. Hermione could not believe her eyes.

_Patricia_?

"Lucius?" she whispered, not taking her eyes off that woman.

"What is it?" he asked, but then he noticed her too.

The woman started walking towards them and Hermione could not help but feel terrified. She had not expected to see her ever again. She believed Lucius when he said he would take care of her. She _believed_ him. Was he lying?

Patricia walked over to them, "Lucius, dear, how nice to see you again."

Hermione could not help but notice how elegant the woman was in her long black dress and with her blonde hair pulled up, revealing a diamond necklace around her neck.

"What the hell are you doing here, Patricia?" Lucius' voice was quiet, but murderous.

"I thought everyone was invited."

"I made it clear what I want of you," he growled, "Leave now."

The woman let out a short laugh, "You are throwing me out? _Again_?"

Lucius simply glared at her.

Hermione noticed the woman was a bit drunk by the way she was speaking and swaying on her feet.

"I cannot believe you chose _her_," Patricia pointed at Hermione, "Over me! When did you start falling for Mudbloods, Lucius?"

"Keep you voice down," he warned her, looking around.

"No, no, I will _not_ keep my voice down!" she snapped, "I was good enough for you when she was not around and now you think you can just push me aside? Well, it is not going to be that easy, dear Lucius!"

Hermione could see more and more guests were starting to notice the fight.

"Everyone will know what you are, Lucius!" Patricia raised her voice even more.

"Patricia, you will leave now if you know what is good for you," Lucius spoke quietly and calmly, but Hermione was not fooled by his tone. She knew he was furious and wondered if Patricia knew that too.

"I don't understand it! I can't understand what you see in her!" the woman continued.

"Patricia," Lucius grabbed her by her elbow, "You are leaving now."

"Fine, but first I want to do this!" she spat and with one quick movement she spilled the champagne all over Hermione who let out a short scream of surprise and then pain as the liquid came in contact with her eyes.

She tried to wipe it off her face, but it burned and she could not even open her eyes.

"That's it!" Lucius snapped, dragging Patricia away.

Hermione could hear them walking away and arguing. She stumbled a few steps, until she found a wall. Then she slowly opened her eyes. blinking a few times to clear her vision. She could see people were looking at her, whispering among themselves.

Finally Lucius was back with a cold smile on his lips, "Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned."

That seemed to relax the crowd and some of them even laughed while others nodded their head in understanding.

"Please, do enjoy the party," he said and when everyone continued, he turned towards Hermione.

"Are you alright?" he asked quietly.

Hermione shook her head, "I thought...you promised I would never see her again."

"She was not invited - "

"That's not the point," Hermione whispered, "Are...are you still with her?"

"Not that it is any of your business, but I am not," he replied, "Why do you think she came here tonight?"

She looked down, "This party is pathetic."

Lucius looked around, "I think it is finally coming to an end."

ooo

It was over.

Everyone finally left.

Without words, Lucius dragged Hermione up the stairs towards her bedroom. She gritted her teeth at the pain in her arm, she could not understand why was he so angry. Was it at her?

Lucius was gripping her so hard, she was positive there would be bruises on her skin the next day.

"I know how to walk!" she snapped at him, but that only caused him to tighten his grip, still not saying anything to her.

Finally they reached the room and Lucius pushed her inside, causing her to stumble, almost tripping over her own feet.

She turned around to face him, angrily, "What is your problem?"

"Funny you should ask," he finally spoke, his eyes cold, "I have quite a few problems at the moment and mostly it is because of you."

"Me? It's not my fault Patricia - "

"I am not talking about _that_, I am talking about you not being able to control..._it_. Do you realize what happened downstairs? What almost happened? How am I going to explain the glass suddenly exploding?"

Blinking a few times, she nodded, "I know, but...that is not my fault."

"Is it not?"

"No!" she raised her voice, "It's not _me_ doing these things."

"And I am supposed to believe that?" he drawled, "Why should I? All I have got is your word."

"I'm not lying, Lucius," she stated, then admitted, "I am not capable of wandless magic."

He was silent, simply observing her, deciding whether or not she was telling the truth.

"These strange things started happening in the last weeks, right?" she asked, "It's..._it_. The power is not coming from me. Unfortunately."

He took a deep breath, "Then we better get rid of it soon. Before it causes even more trouble."

Not knowing how to feel at hearing those cruel words, she simply nodded.

"The potion will be ready tomorrow. You will stay in this room until then, hopefully everything will be finished soon," he explained, then turned to leave.

"Wait!" Hermione stopped him before he could disappear from the room.

He let out a tired sigh, then turned around slowly, raising his eyebrows.

"I-I would like to ask you something."

When he remained silent, she continued, "What do you know about Pureblood marriages?"

"Pureblood marriages?" he repeated.

"Yes. More specifically, about the Marriage law."

Realization dawned on his face, "Ah, you are interested in details of the marriage between Severus and your friend Weasley."

"I am."

He nodded, "What do you wish to know?"

"Everything, the rules, the meaning of it, consequences if you break the rules," Hermione explained.

"Well, aren't you a Know-it-all?" Lucius taunted her with a smirk.

"Please."

He looked at her for a long moment, then nodded, "There were many loses in the War, especially on our side. We do not want our race to disappear in a few decades and the law will help at that department. All single Purebloods and also Halfbloods must marry their reward if he or she is a Pureblood or Halfblood. That way our line will continue."

"What are the rules of the matrimony?"

"If the reward refuses to marry, then death is the punishment."

Hermione tried to keep an emotionless face as she listened.

Lucius continued, "The marriage must be consummated at the night of the wedding otherwise both Master and the slave will be punished."

"By what?" Hermione asked, although she knew the answer.

"By death," he continued, "A child must be produced within the first year of the marriage, no contraceptives are allowed. Separation is not allowed."

Hermione took a deep breath, "Were you at their wedding?"

"Yes, it was a private ceremony," then he added, "The bride did not seem so happy. That is what you want to know, is it not?"

"This is...the law...it's madness. To force people - "

"It is needed to save our race," Lucius said coldly, "And as for your friend; she better be thankful she ended with Severus. I do not know any other Death Eater that would endure her childish behavior as long as Severus has."

"Not even _you_?" Hermione asked quietly.

He smirked, "I would teach her discipline, believe me."

"Like you've taught me?"

The smirk disappeared from his face, "I have changed you. You cannot deny that."

"I never did," she admitted, looking at him.

He stared at her for a moment, then snapped out of it, "Go to bed, Mudblood."

He turned and left.

ooo

Hermione lay in her bed, staring into darkness, lost in her thoughts. It had to be late at night, but she could not sleep. She knew well enough what day was tomorrow.

Snape would bring the potion.

And...her problem would be saved.

But what if she was making a mistake?

Perhaps she should...keep it?

Why?

Where were these thoughts coming from?

Ever since she realized she was pregnant, she was decided to get rid of it. It was not something that was made out of love or even respect. That child was a product of some kind of a sick and twisted relationship. What good could it do bringing it into this world?

Lucius did not want it. Or...he was confused about what he wanted.

She did not want it.

But...

Like Snape suggested, she could use it to achieve her goals. She was not stupid, it did not escape her attention the way Lucius was acting around her. It was _different_. _He_ was different. But using an unborn child to manipulate Lucius was wrong, right?

And the power. Finally she had the taste of magic. After months of being without it, she was finally able to use it in some way. Even though it was not coming from her. Perhaps she should keep _it_ in order to keep the power. She could never know when she will need to defend herself.

As she stared at the darkness, she remembered those times when she was blind. It seemed like a lifetime ago. When all she had was Lucius' voice, his smell and touch. Nothing else. Complete isolation.

She could not even imagine being blind right now.

Pulling herself into a sitting position, she ran her hand through her hair, a bit annoyed by the fact that she could not sleep. Just as she was about to get up to go to the bathroom a strange feeling shot through her.

A feeling of...deja vu.

Like a memory.

She could remember being in the dark and hearing something.

Hermione blinked a few times, trying to remember the rest of the memory. It was frustrating, like trying to remember a dream.

_Darkness._

_Crookshanks._

_A dark figure in the corner of her room._

_When did this happen_, Hermione thought, pushing through the fog, trying to remember everything.

_Someone pushing her into the wall._

_A hand over her mouth._

She could remember it now.

_It was Lucius._

_It was his smell. So familiar._

_And then he...said something to her._

_It was his voice._

Hermione could remember it all now.

He had been in her room.

And he erased her memory. Why? When did it happen?

She was anxious, she needed to confront him about it, she almost got up to go to his bedroom, but stopped herself. It would not be a good idea to wake him in the middle of the night. Besides, she did not want to go to his bedroom, not after what happened last time she was there.

The questions would have to wait until morning.

She could not believe it.

He had been in her room. In the Muggle world. She could now remember seeing a shadow in her room a couple of times, but she never went to check what it was. She could remember his scent in her room a few times, but she blamed it on her imagination.

Was it really him? Why was he there? Why was he watching her?

There was no sleep for her that night.

ooo

Snape arrived early in the morning, not even bothering with formalities. He simply handed her the small bottle and that was all. No words. Nothing.

Hermione did not feel comfortable in his presence. Even though she knew he was not evil, she could not help but feel angry at him. What he was doing with Ginny was not right.

"Where is Lucius?" she asked coldly.

"He will be here in a few minutes."

She nodded, looking away. She had thought perhaps Lucius would not want to be present. Even if that were the case, she would demand his presence. He was equally responsible for the situation they were in, perhaps even more than she was. And she would not allow him to take the easy way out, she would not go alone through this.

"Miss Granger, I would like to use these few minutes to explain myself," Snape said, approaching her.

Crossing her arms over her chest, Hermione looked at him, "I do not think that is necessary."

"I believe it is. You cannot accuse me of horrible things and expect me to leave it at that."

"I really do not want to -"

He cut her off, "You _will_ listen."

She bit her tongue in annoyance, but remained silent, waiting for him to speak.

"Last night you accused me of raping Ginevra," he spoke coldly, "I would like you to explain yourself first."

"_I_ should explain myself?" she asked, surprised.

His hard eyes told her he meant it, so she nodded, "Alright. Ginny told me everything."

"And what might that everything be?"

"Don't play ignorant, Professor, please! She told me about the marriage, the wedding night, _everything_. Why did you force her into something she did not want to?"

Snape listened patiently, then nodded, "You are her friend, is that correct? Do you care about her?"

"Of course I do!"

"Would you like to see her dead? Tortured? Handed to someone else? Would you like to see me dead?" he asked, looking deep into her eyes, "What would happen to you then? What would happen to the...Resistance?" the last word came out as a whisper.

Hermione understood everything he was saying to her. Still, his actions were wrong and disgusting.

"I did what had to be done for the greater good," he continued, "And even if Ginevra does not want to believe it, she will be thankful at the end."

"It's still wrong. Don't you see it? She's...what? Barely seventeen now?"

"I never said it was not wrong, but it had to be done. Do you realize how severe the consequences would have been otherwise?" he asked, his face hard.

Hermione remained silent, looking down at her hands. She was torn. A part of her wanted to be on Ginny's side, but the other part of her understood Snape's motives. And she had to admit that what he did was the right thing for the greater good.

His voice was somewhat softer when he next spoke, "I even offered to erase her memories afterwards, but she refused. She did not want anything from me, not even a Pain potion."

"Can you blame her?" she asked, meeting his eyes.

He sighed and Hermione could see he was uncomfortable talking to her about such private matter. There was shame and remorse on his face, but he did what was necessary to do and would do so again if needed. Perhaps she should try to be more like him. The end justifies the means, right?

"Professor," she started slowly, "I-I am sorry for attacking you like that yesterday, it was not my place to...accuse you of anything, but... You have to realize how...wrong everything is."

"I am aware of that, Miss Granger," he spoke, "I do not enjoy bedding a girl young enough to be my daughter, I do not even want her in my house, but the circumstances forced us into this situation."

"What about...a child that you are required to - ?"

"Never going to happen," he said, his tone not leaving any room for argument.

She looked at him confused, "But...Ginny said no contraceptives are allowed."

A slight smirk passed his features, "I am a Potions Master. I have brewed something they will not be able to detect. I do not wish to have a child."

Relief washed over Hermione' face, but then she remembered something, "Does Ginny know that?"

"I cannot tell her. Safety reasons."

"But she's starving herself because of that!" Hermione explained.

"What are you talking about?"

"She's - "

She could not finish the sentence as Lucius entered the room, wearing a serious expression.

"Did I interrupt something?" he asked, looking at Hermione, who was visibly upset.

"I was just explaining to her how this potion works," Snape answered.

"I am sure she remembers it from the last time you explained it to her," Lucius drawled, "I want it to be over as soon as possible."

"Then I will leave you two alone," Snape said, meeting Hermione's eyes for the last time before quietly exiting the room.

Lucius took a deep breath, crossing his arms uncomfortably, while Hermione played with the potion in her hands.

"Well?" he said impatiently, "I do not have the whole day. This problem was dragged on for too long."

Hermione looked up at him, "Do I need to remind you it was you who destroyed the potion last time?"

He tensed, but ignored her comment, "Just drink it."

Silence.

"I need to ask you something first, Lucius."

"Well?" he hurried her.

"Last night I remembered something," she said, looking into his eyes, "I remembered being at home, _my_ home, and you were there. You were in my room."

His expression didn't change, but his eyes widened for a few brief seconds.

"Why were you there? And why couldn't I remember it?"

He snorted, "That is ridiculous."

"Is it? I remember it clearly, Lucius. And not just one. I remember seeing a shadow in my room a couple of times."

"A _shadow_?" he mocked, "Of course, that had to be me."

"Lucius," she said seriously, "I just want to know why were you there. _Why_? And why did you Obliviate me?"

He looked at her coldly, "I was not in your room, Mudblood."

Hermione could see she was not going to get answers from him. Not now. He was lying, she knew that, but he was not telling her anything. She sighed in defeat, looking at the potion in her hands. That conversation would have to wait until some other time. He would have to explain himself, she was not going to let him leave those questions unanswered.

"Hurry up, will you," he snapped.

"What if we are doing a wrong thing, Lucius?" she asked quietly.

"Nonsense."

"Is it?" she looked up at him again, "The baby is not even two months old and already it's so powerful."

"Do not call it like that," he spoke quietly.

_Baby._

She hadn't even realized she used that word.

Lucius continued, "We do not know if it's coming from _it_. And even if it did, it does not make a difference."

"Because I'm a Mudblood?" she asked.

"Yes."

She forced her face to remain emotionless, even though it still hurt. Even after so many months, it still hurt when he insulted her blood status.

"But I am magical," she said quietly.

"You do not deserve to be," was his only response.

Anger flashed through her eyes and she stood up, throwing the potion to the bed, "Too bad I'm not a Pureblood, because you need an heir, Lucius."

He tensed, glaring at her, but not saying anything.

Hermione continued, "You are not in your best years anymore and you desperately need someone who will carry on the Malfoy line. Who will get all the fortune when you die? You'll leave it to who, Lucius?"

"Certainly not to that _halfblood_ that you're carrying," the words dripped with venom.

"But you said earlier that halfbloods are acceptable. Snape himself is a halfblood."

"That is different."

"Why?"

Silence.

She could not understand why she was fighting back. Why didn't she simply drink the potion and get it over with? Perhaps it was because she could not allow him to humiliate her on this level as well. If she got rid of it, it would be another confirmation of how much he despised her and thought she was unworthy of anything his.

_No._

She _was_ worthy.

"You are still blinded by prejudices, Lucius," she said to him, "You cannot admit it to yourself that you, Lucius Malfoy, bedded a Mudblood and got her pregnant."

His face hardened at that, but Hermione continued. She needed to tell him what she thought of him.

"Was I the first?" she asked, "The first Mudblood you've slept with?"

"Of course," he answered with disgust, "My first and only mistake."

"And it cost you. You cannot stand that there is something of you growing inside of me, and it seems that it's powerful, very powerful. You don't want to admit it that you and I actually succeeded in producing something magical."

"Shut your mouth and drink the potion," he was angry by this point.

Her voice started to shake, "Well, I'm sorry, it's not Draco, but it is yours!"

"Mudblood - "

"You know what?" she forced a smile, "I don't think I will drink that potion."

Lucius snapped, grabbing the potion from the bed and taking a step closer to her, "You _will_ drink it."

"No."

"Yes.

"No!" she screamed at him.

"Damn it!" he grabbed her by her shoulders, "I am ordering you to drink it!"

"Let go of me!" she struggled, "You will not get rid of it that easily! What are you afraid of? That because of it, I'm actually able to do magic? Is that what's bothering you? That I'm not as helpless as before?"

"Mudblood, shut your mouth!" he growled, rage showing on his face.

"Let go of me!" she screamed, but he was not listening to her.

"You will drink it, even if I have to force it down your throat!"

A short laugh escaped her, "Of course! Use violence! Force me, that's all you've good at!"

"Drink it!"

She tried to push him away, "I won't! Let go of me, you coward!"

_Smack._

He backhanded her across the face hard, sending her to the floor instantly.

Tears clouded her sight immediately as she brought her hand up to her bruised cheek.

He was breathing heavily, she could hear it, but did not look up at him.

What just happened?

No words came from him as he slowly took a step away from her, the potion falling from his hands, landing on the floor next to Hermione, not breaking.

It hurt.

Her jaw hurt, there was a lot of force behind his slap, he was truly furious.

And it hurt on the inside.

She had not expected him to hit her. After everything they have been through, she thought they were past that point. She was so naive.

It had been long since he last hit her. She could remember the day when the violence stopped. The day he found out she was pregnant.

And now...he hit her again.

"Mudblood, drink the potion," he said, his voice quiet and weak.

"I almost forgot who you are," she whispered, "Thank you for reminding me."

"I did not want to...do that."

"But you did."

"You pushed me, Mudblood."

This time she did look up at him, "You hit me."

His face hardened but he said nothing to defend himself.

After a few long moments, Hermione pulled herself up, facing him, "I won't take the potion. Try to force me if you want."

He simply blinked a few times, then turned and left the room, slamming the doors behind him.

For a few long moments Hermione simply stood there, her heart threatening to jump out of her ribcage. Her mind replayed the event over and over again. Why did she feel the need to anger him, to stand up to him? Was she subconciously so furious at him, that she simply had to make him miserable?

And even if that was the case, it was nothing wrong with it. He was a Death Eater, he _should_ suffer.

Hermione tried to calm herself down, taking a few breaths, thinking if she was doing the right thing. Was she keeping the baby out of the right reasons?

ooo

"That stupid girl refuses to take the potion!"

Severus Snape looked at his friend, who was walking up and down the study room, his face furious.

"I did not expect that," he admitted.

"I thought she would be glad to finally get rid of it, Severus."

"What might have changed her mind?"

Lucius snorted, "She wants to annoy me, make my life a living hell."

"You two will have to make up your mind about this," Snape drawled, "I do not wish to lose my time brewing yet another Potion that will get destroyed."

"It is not destroyed," Lucius shook her head, "I left it with her."

"Perhaps I can talk to her? Try to make her see reason?"

"Perhaps," Lucius nodded, then his face darkened, "She is playing with fire, Severus. She needs to know that Potion is not the only way to get rid of that...thing. There is lots of other options. Messier options and I do not think she would like that very much."

Snape raised his brow, "Would you truly be able to do that?"

Lucius was silent for a long moment, lost in his thoughts.

"Contrary to popular belief, Lucius, you are not a violent man by nature," Snape continued, "Would you be able to - "

"She is forcing me to do it."

"Lucius, you both need to calm down."

"Go talk to her, Severus," Lucius sighed, pouring himself a glass of Firewhiskey.

ooo

Hermione was sitting on the bed and playing with the small bottle in her hands when Snape entered the room.

"You know, you were supposed to drink the potion, not play with it," he said, raising his eyebrows at her.

"And I was never even supposed to be in this situation to begin with."

Snape remained silent, looking down at her.

"He sent you, didn't her?" Hermione asked calmly.

"He did."

"Well, you can turn around and leave."

"Why the sudden change of heart?" he asked, surprised, "Not long ago, it was you who was convinced on getting rid of it."

Hermione took a deep breath, "Perhaps I don't want things to be the way they used to be."

"Meaning?"

"I've noticed it, you know."

"Noticed what exactly?"

Her voice was barely above a whisper when she next spoke, "He's changed. His behavior has changed towards me. And it's because of _it_, it has to be that. I-I don't want to go back where he treated me like...dirt."

Snape remained silent and Hermione continued, "Besides, it's powerful. Has Lucius told you?"

"No, he usually avoids conversations about that," he replied.

Hermione took a deep breath, "I am able to do magic. Not always, not even when I want to...but it's happened a few times now."

Snape narrowed his eyes in confusion, "What do you mean? What kind of magic?"

"Once I...sent Lucius flying across the room and last night, at the party, that incident with Richard Madwill and his glass exploding? That was...the baby."

Snape listened to her carefully, a trace of disbelief on his face, "Perhaps it was _you_? Perhaps you have developed the ability to...move things with your mind."

Hermione shook her head, "Unlikely. Besides, why didn't I develop it a few months ago when he was torturing me daily, when I wished for my own death, when I wished for _his_ death?"

"It certainly is...interesting," then he snapped out of his thoughts, "Granger, listen carefully. He has mentioned perhaps trying out other methods if you refuse to drink the potion."

She understood exactly what he meant with that.

"He wants to...what? Torture me with the Cruciatus, kick me in the stomach, starve me?" she demanded, her voice shaking as she spoke.

"He has only mentioned it. But...I have to warn you to be careful."

"If that's what he really wants, I can't stop him."

"Do not push him," Snape advised, then looked at her bruised cheek, before meeting her eyes again, "Perhaps the best thing would be to end it."

"No."

"Granger."

"I have made my mind, you can leave now," her tone left no room for argument.

She needed to be alone.

"As you wish," he sighed, "Soon we will talk about Richard Madwill and about what you are expected to do. Be prepared."

Hermione simply nodded her head in understanding and Snape left the room, leaving her alone again.

ooo

She was left alone in the room for the next two days. It was frustrating. The doors were locked, she was trapped. The only visitor she had was the elf who brought her food, but he would not tell her anything about Lucius.

With each passing hour she was more and more angry.

Who did Lucius think he was?

She was not an animal that could be locked up for days without any human contact. Was that his way of punishing her? Or perhaps he was trying to make her change her mind.

Well, it was not working.

She threw a glance at the potion standing at the nightstand, untouched.

She would _not_ change her mind.

And did he really want her to take the potion or was he pretending, ignoring what he really wanted? She could still remember that night not long ago when Patricia threw her out of the Manor. The worry on Lucius' face, the way in which he took care of her and then...his hand on her belly. She was a bit out of it then, but she could clearly remember that. It was not just her imagination.

_God._

_Where is he?_

ooo

Fourth day came.

And when the doors finally opened, Hermione had to admit she was glad to see him.

Did she miss him?

No, of course not.

She tried to keep an emotionless face as he approached her, looking at her in a strange way.

Something was wrong. Why was he staring at her like that?

Finally he spoke, "I have been thinking."

Hermione felt the need to take a step away, but she forced herself to stay where she was.

He continued, "It always did seem strange to me. Your return, your behavior."

"Lucius - "

"You know where I was supposed to be that morning when you decided to came into my bedroom?"

Hermione's blood ran cold at that, but she somehow managed to shake her head. She could only hope there was confusion on her face.

"I was supposed to be at a very important meeting," he explained, "But I was...detained."

Where was he going with it?

"There was an attack," he continued, "There were no survivors."

"W-What?" Hermione asked, "Attack?"

"Yes, the Resistance," he observed her face for any kind of sign that she was pretending.

"Why are you telling me this?" she asked, her heart was literally in her throat.

"You do not see what is suspicious?" he raised his eyebrow, "I was supposed to be at that meeting. I was supposed to be dead."

Hermione kept her mouth shut, waiting for him to continue.

"If you had not came into my bedroom, I would have been dead by now."

"Y-You can't know that - "

"I _do_ know," he said, "And that makes me think."

Hermione swallowed hard, trying hard to keep eye contact with him.

"It makes my think about the reason you came to me," he said calmly.

"You know why I came to you."

"You are lying."

"What?"

"Tell me the truth, Mudblood," Lucius demanded, "No more lies."

"I told you the truth! What more do you want from me?

Lucius nodded, "You woke up early in the morning and felt this strange need to be with me?"

"Y-Yes," she nodded, then looked down in shame.

"I find that hard to believe."

"Believe what you want," she spat at him, trying to walk past him, but he grabbed her arm and pulled her to him.

"Mudblood," he started, "No more games."

"I'm not playing," she replied, her body reacting in a strange way to being this close to him.

"Do you still want me?"

"_What_?"

"At this very moment? Do you still want me?" he repeated, not letting go of her.

Hermione remained silent for a long moment, but then she shook her head, "No."

"Why not?"

"Just let go of me!"

Before Hermione even realized what was happening, Lucius pressed his lips to hers roughly, pulling her into a hungry kiss. But what surprised her the most was that she was kissing him back. The reaction was an immediate explosion of sensations and desire.

Lucius finally broke the kiss, looking down at her blushed face, "Naughty little girl, not able to resist a Death Eater."

"Lucius, let go of me," she demanded, still feeling him on her lips.

"Why does it bother you now? You were all too eager for it a few days ago."

"Well, I'm not now!"

His face hardened, "Perhaps because that too was just a lie? You were pretending back then."

"No!"

"Prove it," he demanded, still not letting go of her.

"What do you want from me?" she finally went limp in his arms, not struggling anymore.

"Prove that you were not pretending that morning."

He stared at her with his deep grey eyes and finally she decided what to do. She considered speaking, but she was afraid she would betray herself. Instead, she stood on her toes, lifted her head, and gently pressed her lips to his. He simply stood there while she softly sucked on his bottom lip, waiting for his response. She felt the moment he responded. His hands clenched behind her back, pulling her completely against him, smashing her gentle curves into his hard contours. His kiss became ravenous, devouring her as her mind was absorbed with vivid colors and the sound of his harsh breathing. He then slid his lips over her chin, sliding his lean body downward as he lightly nipped, licked and sucked at her throat, Hermione arching and gasping at the feel of his mouth on her skin.

Slowly they were moving backwards until Hermione's legs hit the bed, she fell onto it, her eyes still closed. She expected to feel his body on hers, but it never came.

After a moment she opened her eyes, noticing him standing over her with a harsh expression on his face.

"Lucius?"

"I do not trust you, Mudblood," he spoke coldly, "I will discover what you are up to, believe me."

Before she had a chance to respond, he left the room, locking it behind him.

Hermione made no move to get up from the bed.

What had almost happened? _Again_?

She could not believe her own body was betraying her in such a way. She should be despising the fact that she wanted him, but...she did not. When he kissed her, she forgot about everything.

But what about him?

She always analyzed herself and her own behavior and feelings towards him, but what did _he_ feel?

He was responding to her, it was not all just an act. She found it hard to believe she had such an affect on him. If she was completely honest with herself, she could not understand what he even liked about her. She could explain why _she_ was attracted to him; the hormones were making her crazy and he was...good looking, there was no denying.

But what about him?

Hermione never thought of herself as attractive. And Lucius could have almost any other woman. Patricia, for example. That woman was much prettier, she was _beautiful_. And Hermione was...what? Why would he even want to kiss her? She was nothing special, she did not even know what she was doing when she was kissing him.

And now she was in trouble.

He was suspicious of her. He could figure everything out if she was not careful. And that was the last thing she wanted.

No matter how much she needed him, wanted him, no matter how much her body _craved_ him, she knew what her mission was. The Resistance was keeping him alive for the moment only because they needed him. What would happen once they did not need him anymore?

**A/N: This update did not come as fast as the last one did, but at least I did not keep you waiting for a month. ;) Thank you for all the lovely reviews! I do remember my promise about making this story darker than In the Dark and soon we are getting there. ;)**


	15. Chapter 15

**~ chapter 15 ~**

Hermione was humiliated. And frightened.

Lucius was closer and closer to the truth. The truth she did not want him to discover.

And perhaps it was wrong but...what bothered her the most was the way he left her. The way he _used_ her and just as she was about to give in to him again, he left. Yet _again_ he succeeded in humiliating her.

Hermione bit her lower lip angrily.

He only humiliated her because she allowed him to do so. If she had rejected him the moment he entered her room, she would have won.

Taking a deep breath, she walked over to the large mirror at the dressing table and then she did something she avoided for a long time. She looked straight at her reflection. She needed to accept herself, she needed to love herself if she wanted to be stronger than Lucius. How did she expect him to respect her if she did not respect herself?

Putting on a strong face, she looked at her own eyes, noticing how tired and...unfamiliar they seemed. She really did change so much in just a few months.

But then something else caught her attention.

Her stomach.

It was not as flat as before. There was a slight bulge, nothing too noticeable, it was as if she had had a big meal. But Hermione knew the real reason behind it.

Pressing her hand to her belly, she realized she could no longer hide the truth from herself. She was pregnant and she better start accepting that. There was no option of getting rid of it anymore. She decided to keep it, no matter what Lucius thought of her decision. She was pregnant and it was completely normal that it would start showing. What did she expect?

And Lucius was going to be a father. For the second time. No matter how much he hated it.

Slowly walking back to the bed, she decided to wait with those serious thoughts. It was still early to think about the baby. It was still so small, it was barely there. First she had to concentrate on herself. Lucius had played enough with her. She would not allow it anymore.

With that thought in her mind, she went to sleep and was actually able to have a good night's rest.

ooo

"Good morning."

Hermione slowly opened her eyes, blinking a few times to get used to the light.

"_Good morning_," the voice repeated.

"M-Morning?" she replied, but it came out more as a question.

When she was finally awake, she noticed Lucius standing near the bed, looking down at her. She could not help but feel annoyed at his presence. What did he want with her this early in the morning?

"Mudblood, finally, I've been trying to wake you up for a couple of minutes now," he said, but his voice was not hard as she would expect it to be.

Pulling herself up, she looked at him, confused, "What do you want?"

"My my, that is a bit rude from you," he said, smirking at her.

Hermione simply stared at him, waiting for him to reveal a reason for his visit. There had to be a reason, he would not visit her simply because he wanted to see how she was doing.

She noticed he threw a glance at the potion that Snape gave to her. It was standing on the nightstand, untouched. Just as she thought he was about to comment that, his eyes found hers again.

"I would like you to join me for breakfast downstairs."

Hermione looked at him, skeptical, not believing what she just heard.

"Is something the matter?" he asked, innocently.

"You would like me to...have breakfast with you?" she asked, realizing how strange it sounded.

He was playing with her again. There had to be something behind it, that invitation did not come from the kindness of his heart.

"Yes, was I not clear enough?" he asked, then added, "Be ready in ten minutes. The elf will accompany you."

With those words he turned and left the room, leaving Hermione completely confused. What had gotten into him? What brilliant idea had he come up with over the night?

Then she remembered one morning a couple of weeks ago when she was supposed to have breakfast with him and he put a full body bind spell on her and left her like that for hours. She could still remember her stomach complaining at the delicious food in front of her, the smell...and not being able to touch it.

Did he plan on doing that again?

Well, there was only one way to find out.

ooo

The elf did come for her ten minutes later. As they walked downstairs, Hermione did not even bother asking questions. The elf was very faithful to Lucius, probably more out of fear than respect.

As she walked into the large dining room, she could not help but feel like walking into a trap. It was too good to be true.

The large table was meant for at least twenty people, not only Lucius. And the food! It was too much. As she slowly approached the table, she recognized tea, milk, coffee and fruit juices. There were muffins, scrambled eggs, fried bacon, toast, fruit, pancakes, _everything_. Did breakfasts always look like that in the Malfoy Manor? It was too much for Lucius himself.

He was sitting at the head of the table, reading the Daily Prophet. Hermione approached the table, standing there uncomfortably, not quite sure what to do.

He immediately put the newspaper away as he noticed her, "Well, take a seat."

Hermione obeyed, forcing herself to look away from all the delicious food in front of her.

Lucius had a slight smile on his face as he took a sip of coffee, "Eat."

She could no longer pretend nothing strange was happening, so she looked at him, "What is all this, Lucius?"

"What do you mean?" he looked at her innocently.

"This," she pointed at the table, "What am I doing here?"

"Well, I figured you would want to have a decent breakfast after so long. Was I perhaps mistaken?"

"No," she shook her head, "But...this isn't you. I..." then she realized what was happening, "You put something in the food, haven't you?"

"Mudblood -"

"Snape's potion or perhaps...some kind of a poison," she stared at him, observing every expression on his face.

"Please," he sneered, "You insult me."

She remained silent, simply glaring at him.

"Do you truly believe I would do such a thing?"

"Yes," her answer was immediate.

His expression turned serious, "You are wrong," then he smiled again, "And you know why?"

"Pray tell," Hermione did not believe any word that came from him. And the way he was acting was seriously scaring her, she was not used to the nice Lucius and she did not want it.

He stood up, walking over to her, then stepping behind her, his hands suddenly on her shoulders. Hermione tensed up, but forced herself to stay where she was. He would not have such an effect on her.

"I spent the whole night thinking and..." his hands slid down her arms, "I realized that perhaps you are right."

"What - ?"

He leaned over her, his hands stopping on her stomach, "I was mistaken by trying to get rid of it."

The whole air was pushed out of her lungs at hearing him say that and she was left completely speechless.

"It is mine," he spoke, his breath on her neck, "And no harm should be done to him."

"_Her_," Hermione suddenly corrected, surprising even herself. There was that strange feeling that it was a _her_, there was no logical explanation, but it was just how she felt.

He smirked, "Or _her_. It does not matter. It is a Malfoy."

Hermione listened to his voice, almost allowing herself to believe his words. But then she snapped out of it, pushing his hands away and standing up, facing him.

"Stop it!"

"Why are you so rude, Mudblood?" he asked, narrowing his eyes at her.

"What is this? What are you trying to achieve?"

"Nothing," he drawled, "I am simply telling you that I have changed my mind."

Hermione stared at him, trying to understand what he was saying to her. There was no sign on his face that he was mocking her, but she did not believe him. She would be a fool to believe him.

"Stop it," she repeated, calmly this time.

He simply sighed and made his way back to his chair, sitting down and taking a sip of coffee.

Hermione observed him, trying to ignore the delicious food on the table in front of her. Her stomach was complaining loudly and by the smirk on his face, she knew Lucius could hear it as well.

For the next couple of minutes, Hermione was completely ignored as she stood there, watching Lucius enjoying his breakfast and reading the Daily Prophet.

"I want to go back to my room," she said quietly.

"It is rude to leave in the middle of a meal," was his only comment.

He did not even look at her. Hermione bit her lip angrily and remained silent. After she could not stand it anymore, she approached her chair, taking a deep breath, "Lucius?"

"Hmm?"

"You promise you did not put anything in the food?" she asked, observing his face.

"If I did, do you think I would be eating it?"

"There are ways around it."

He sighed in annoyance, then put the newspaper away and looked at her, "I did not put anything in the food."

There was no sign on his face that he was lying or playing with her. After all those months, Hermione was convinced she was perfectly capable of reading the emotions on his face, she was able to notice those little details when he was lying to her. And she was unable to find any of it now.

Was he that good at pretending?

Deciding to take a risk, she poured herself some orange juice, slowly bringing the glass to her mouth. It did not escape her attention that Lucius stopped eating and was simply staring at her now. She did feel uncomfortable under his gaze, but decided to ignore it. If he had put something in the food, then so be it.

She took a few gulps of the juice, enjoying the taste of it. She could not remember the last time. After weeks of monotone food, orange juice felt unbelieveable.

She carefully put the glass down, waiting a few moments, expecting pain to hit her anytime now. She could almost see herself, falling from the chair, curling in a ball, her body cramping.

She waited.

And then nothing happened.

No pain.

No discomfort.

"Good?" Lucius asked, arching an eyebrow.

Hermione slowly nodded, still not completely relaxed. Perhaps there was nothing in the food, but she still did not believe him and his sweet words.

"Take a muffin," he offered.

Looking up at him suspiciously, she noticed he was literally staring at her.

Why?

"You are hungry," he stated, "Eat."

Finally Hermione gave in. Nodding, she took the muffin and ate it without shame in a matter of seconds. She was so hungry she did not care if Lucius thought she was without manners.

But he did not seem to be interested in the way in which she ate. It looked to her as if he was enjoying seeing her eat. He kept offering her food and she kept accepting. This could be the last time she had a chance to eat as much as she wanted.

Finally, after almost half an hour, she leaned back in the chair, breathing heavily.

She felt full.

Almost too full.

"A bit more bread?" Lucius asked.

Hermione quickly shook her head, "I've...had enough."

"You are eating for two now."

That sentence made her eyes to snap towards him.

"What is it?" he questioned.

"You can stop pretending, Lucius," she said quietly, "I know you are doing this because you want something."

He nodded, "Yes, I want you to be healthy. You are far too skinny."

"No," she said, a sad smile forming on her lips, "You are not worried about me. This is some kind of a game, it has to be."

"Let us talk about important questions now," he suggested, completely ignoring her last sentence.

Hermione waited for him to continue.

"First, you are going to need more clothes. Bigger clothes and I don't think there are any left from when Narcissa..." he trailed off, then forced a smirk on his face, "That means we will have to go shopping."

"W-What?"

"You will have to start taking care of yourself better, I will have Severus examine you."

This was all too much for her. Hermione could barely listen to him.

"How...how far along are you?" he asked, "Two months?"

"Two and a half," she whispered, not even knowing why she was answering him.

I was ridiculous.

She knew he was pretending, but on some level she wanted to believe him. It would make everything easier. Still, a part of her knew it was all a play.

"Hmm," was his only response.

But she noticed that strange, calculating look in his eyes, "What is it?"

"Soon you are going to start noticing changes," he drawled, his silky voice sound almost seductive, "Weight gain, backaches, slight swelling of your feet."

He stood up, approaching her, "And there are some things you are probably already experiencing. You are hormone-driven, perhaps you have swollen and tender breasts..."

"_Alright_," Hermione interrupted him, blushing, "I hardly think this is an appropriate subject to have at breakfast."

He smirked at her, "I will visit you later this day, we have a lot to discuss."

Hermione nodded, still suspicious about his behavior. She was half expecting him to turn back to his evil self, but it seemed that was not happening anytime soon. All she could do was play his game. And hope to not get hurt.

"I will do my best to provide you with all the care that you need, but you need to understand that medical attention is not the best in our World, especially when it comes to complicated labors," he explained.

"C-Complicated? Why do you think it will be complicated?"

He looked her up and down, "You are too young. Also, you are too small, you body type will most certainly cause problems."

Hermione tensed, feeling uneasy about his words. She never thought about that. Was it really that dangerous? And given the fact that she had not been actually taking care of herself properly and being put through a couple of doses of the Cruciatus Curse, as well as that incident when she almost froze to death, Hermione realized how risky her pregnancy really was.

"We will continue this conversation later this evening," Lucius said, pulling her out of her thoughts.

After that he called for the elf, who accompanied Hermione back to her bedroom.

ooo

Hermione would be lying if she said she did not expect the possible poison to start taking it's effect. Once she was back in her bedroom, she went straight for the bed, resting and carefully observing her body for any sign of something bad happening.

But there was nothing.

She was perfectly fine.

Even many hours after the breakfast, she still could not push Lucius and his strange behavior out of her mind.

For a few seconds she allowed herself to believe he was being truthful.

He did want the baby.

Perhaps he wanted _her_ as well.

She would be...loved. She desperately craved for human attention. She needed someone to care about her, to love her. For too long now, she had no friends, no one she could trust. Her parents did not even know she existed, she was without friends. She had nobody. Snape was the only person she could rely on, but she knew he was not helping her because he cared about her. His motives were much more complex. He would without doubt sacrifice her if that would help the greater good. And she understood that.

But still she wanted someone to...love her? Was that the right word?

And then she snapped out of it. Lucius was not that person. He would never love her. She would be a fool to ever believe that.

ooo

She was slowly falling asleep when she heard him enter her room.

Immediately she pulled herself in a sitting position, her eyes meeting his.

"I hope you are awake enough to have a serious conversation," he drawled, approaching the bed.

"Of course I am."

Nodding, he crossed his arms over his chest, "I hope you understand the situation you..._we_ are in."

"I do."

"No one must know," he continued, "If anyone were to find out, the consenquences would be severe."

"I know that," Hermione replied, looking down.

"They might accept I was bedding a Mudblood, but they will never accept I made a...halfblood."

When she did not say anything, he continued, "And even when it's born, it will have to remain a secret. Do you understand that?"

It did not escape her attention that he used the word 'it'. And the conversation was making her uncomfortable. She never thought that far ahead, she never thought about what would happen once the baby was born. All she was concentrating on was how to make it through the next six months. But what about after?

What if...something happened to Lucius? If he was not around anymore, if the Resistance won and they...killed him... What would happen to her?

It seemed as if all air went out of the room at that thought.

"It will never have a normal life, neither will you," Lucius spoke, looking down at her.

It was then she understood it all.

He did not change his mind. He still wanted to get rid of it, he was only using a different method of convincing her.

And...it was working.

Hermione met his eyes, "I understand."

"Do you?"

She nodded her head, "Give me a day to...think about everything."

Without a word, he left the room. Hermione took a deep breath, trying to pull herself together.

There were many things to think through.

ooo

"Good morning."

Hermione turned away from the window at the sound of someone's voice.

It was Snape.

She was too lost in her thoughts to hear him enter the room.

But...why was he here?

She looked at him suspiciously, "Is something wrong?"

"No, nothing at all. Why would you think that?"

That calmed her down, "Then what are you doing here?"

"Lucius sent me," he answered, then looked at her, worried, "You seem...tired."

Hermione hugged herself with her arms, "I didn't get any sleep."

"Why is that? Has something happened - "

"No, nothing. It's just..." she trailed off, "Well...Lucius and I had a talk last night."

Snape remained silent.

"We...He made me realize how...foolish the idea of keeping this baby is."

When that sentence left her mouth, she revealed the potion in her hand. Snape looked at it, then his eyes met hers again.

"Granger, I cannot imagine how complicated your situation is," he said, his tone low.

"I've been up all night, playing with the potion, deciding whether to drink it or not..." she admitted, "And then I realized something."

She made sure to look straight into the Potions Master's dark eyes when she next spoke, "I don't want Lucius to get hurt."

Surprise passed his face for a slight second, but he hid it quickly, "Care to explain?"

"I don't want you or the Resistance doing anything to him, I don't want him to...end up dead."

The words seemed so wrong when said them out loud, but Hermione meant every word.

Snape seemed to struggle with words, but then he finally asked, "Why?"

Hermione looked away, shaking her head, "You wouldn't understand."

"Try me."

"I...need him. I can't even imagine..." she did not finish that sentence, but she knew he understood.

He took a deep breath, speaking slowly, "You do understand that even if we win, there is no chance he would be a free man. Azkaban is his best option."

Hermione tensed, "I know that."

"And you would do what? Visit him in Azkaban? Send him letters? Fight for his freedom? Be reasonable, Granger."

"I said I don't want him hurt," Hermione repeated, stronger this time, "I don't need you making fun of me. And I won't allow it. I've been through hell in these last couple of months and this is the only thing I ask of you."

Snape's look was hard, but he chose not to comment, "There are other things to discuss. I am here to tell you about your next mission."

Hermione nodded.

"Madwill," Snape said, "The Resistance wants him dead."

"And...what can I do?" then her eyes widened, "You don't expect _me_ to - "

"No, Granger," he interrupted her, his eyes turning even darker, "We want Lucius to do it."

"W-_What_?"

"Madwill is becoming dangerous, he is convincing Lucius to attack the Muggle World, you heard him at the party."

Hermione could clearly remember the man and his hate for the Muggles.

Snape continued, "If Lucius resists for too long, it will get suspicious. We need Madwill out of the way and if _we_ do it, it would raise suspicions."

"And if Lucius does it, no one will mind?"

"Lucius will think of something. I myself will help him cover it up, but we need Lucius to do it."

Hermione gulped, "What...How can_ I_ help? Why are you telling _me_ this?"

"We need you to convince him. If I was to say anything against Madwill, it would be too dangerous."

"I need to...convince Lucius to kill someone?" she asked, completely against the idea.

"Madwill is a dangerous man, Granger, he is what you call 'evil'. If you want to save the Muggle World, you will help us get rid of him."

Hermione turned away, "How am I supposed to do it? I can't just order him to - "

"I have heard that Lucius and Madwill will be having meetings here. I wish I could be more helpful, but everything is up to you."

"This is impossible! Why would Lucius kill his colleague?" Hermione asked, raising her voice a bit.

Snape's tone was barely above a whisper, when he next spoke, "Do you remember Dolohov?"

Hermione made a disgusted face, simply the memory of that vile man sent shivers down her body.

"Do you remember what happened to him?" he asked.

"Lucius killed him."

"Why?"

"Because he was threatening him and...they hated each other."

Snape have her a look, "Seriously, Granger. Use your head. What was the true reason behind Dolohov's death?"

Hermione understood.

"Me," she whispered.

Even Lucius himself had said so many times.

She could clearly hear his voice in her mind.

_'Hell, I've even killed for you."_

_'Nobody touches my property.'_

"I'll see what I can do," she said quietly, not telling him she seriously doubted she would be able to do it.

She did not agree with this mission. Of course she wanted to keep the Muggle World safe and such an evil man like Madwill did not deserve to live, but...she did not want to make Lucius a murderer. Of course, she was aware of the fact that he had killed before, but she did her best to ignore that fact.

Snape cut through the silence, "Lucius sent me here to check on you, see if you are healthy."

"We can skip that part, just tell him I'm fine," she replied.

"Are you?"

She paused, biting her tongue.

Was she?

"I understand," Snape said, sighing, "I better go now."

Hermione nodded, turning away from him.

She heard him exit the room.

ooo

It was a slow day. And a quiet evening.

And silence was the thing Hermione desperately needed.

Until it all changed in a mere second.

Suddenly something could be heard.

Hermione jumped from her bed at the noise coming from the hallway. Harsh breathing, loud voices and panicking could be heard and she made a move to see what was happening, but then she stopped herself. It was not any of her business and she did not want to anger Lucius by leaving her room without permission.

But something was wrong.

And then she heard _his_ voice and it was not his normal tone. It sounded...different.

Not caring about getting in trouble, she flew from the room, almost bumping into the small elf in the hallway.

"Miss should not be here," the elf said, panicking.

"What is going on?" Hermione demanded, noticing the doors to Lucius' bedroom were open.

Before the elf could answer her, she ran into his room, her mouth falling open at the sight in front of her.

Lucius was sitting on the bed, his back turned to her. His clothes were...torn, bloodied.

"L-Lucius?" she approached the bed, "What happened?"

"What are you doing here?" he tried to use his angry tone, but it came out in a pained moan.

It did not escape her attention that he did not turn to look at her.

Hermione could feel her throat closing up with fear and shock.

"Lucius?" she made a step forward, but his angry tone stopped her.

"Go to your room! _Now_!"

His harsh words almost made her turn around and run away, but she somehow forced herself to stay where she was.

"What happened?" she asked calmly, even though she was completely panicking.

"Go to your room!" he repeated.

Putting on a brave face, Hermione approached him and then a hand covered her mouth in shock at what she saw. His front side was even worse than his back. His clothes were torn, _burnt_ and she could clearly see his chest and _blood_.

_Oh God._

There were cuts on his face and his eyes were...closed. The skin around his eyes was...red, as if he was burnt.

"Lucius," she started again, "W-What should I do? You're...bleeding."

"Return to your room," he repeated, turning away from her, "I already ordered elf to get Severus."

"But - "

"Obey!" he raised his voice, then hissed as pain shot through him.

"What's wrong with your eyes?" she asked, her whole body shaking. She was not used to seeing Lucius hurt, he was always the one with the control, the one who inflicted pain on others, never the other way around.

"None of your business, Mudblood. Leave! I swear to God - "

"I won't leave! I'm staying right here until Snape arrives," she managed to shout back at him, even though her body was shaking uncontrollably.

_Oh God. Oh God._

That seemed to close his mouth, but then another wave of pain shot through his body and he collapsed back into his bed.

Hermione moved towards him, but stopped before she could touch him. What should she do? Was she even allowed to touch him?

He groaned, breathing heavily through his nose, obviously trying to keep any sound of pain inside him.

The next moment, Snape burst into the room, carrying at least a dozen potions in his hands. He dropped them all on the bed, next to Lucius and them moved to attend to him.

Hermione stepped back, only observing the situation in front of her.

"Severus, is s-she still here?" Lucius hissed.

"Yes," Snape answered, opening a small bottle with green liquid.

"Get her out of here!" Lucius ordered, the pain evident in his voice.

Snape turned around to look at Hermione, who simply stood there, too shocked to say anything.

"Take her back to her room!"

"Granger," Snape spoke warningly.

Hermione looked at Lucius, not believing what she was seeing.

It had to be a dream.

A nightmare.

Another scream escaped Lucius' mouth and Hermione ran from the room, slamming the doors behind her. She stopped on the hallway, leaning against the wall, taking deep breaths to calm herself down.

She did not want to go to her bedroom.

She could not just pretend nothing was wrong.

Her whole body was tensed and it felt like someone had just poured a bucket of ice water down her back.

Minutes passed by.

It seemed like hours.

She could hear talking coming from Lucius' bedroom.

Every now and then a pained hiss could be heard, but mostly silence.

At least ten times she made a move to enter the room, but stopped herself before her hand touched the handle. She was not sure she wanted to see that sight again.

All she could do was wait.

ooo

Doors opening.

Then closing.

Hermione looked up, moving her head from her knees. She was on the floor, her back against the wall. It had to be at least two or three hours already.

Snape stopped in his tracks, looking down at her.

"What happened?" Hermione whispered.

"Come," he offered her his hand and helped her to her feet.

He led her into her bedroom, closing the doors behind him.

"There was an accident," he explained.

Hermione could not tear her eyes from his hands. There was blood on it.

"Five prisoners rebelled against the guards, managed to take their wands," he spoke, "Once Lucius and got there, the situation was already being handled, but then there was an explosion."

Hermione tensed up, meeting his eyes.

"Lucius stood too close to it," Snape finished.

"Is he going to be alright?"

"It is not life threatening," he explained, "Mostly just cuts and burns and it should heal in a matter of time."

A sigh of relief escaped Hermione's mouth and did not even try to hide it.

"His eyes are another story," Snape suddenly said, his voice serious.

"W-What do you mean?"

"I did my best, but only time will tell if he would be able to see again or not."

What?

Hermione blinked a few times, shaking her head, "No...that isn't true."

"Granger, listen to me," Snape tried to get her attention, "You will have to take care for him. I will not be able to be here every day."

Even though she was completely shocked and confused, Hermione somehow managed to nod, "What...what do you want me to do?"

"I've left different potions on his nightstand. He needs to drink the purple potion once a day, the blue one twice a day. There is a salve that has to be spread over his burns, especially the ones on his chest."

Hermione listened, trying to memorize his instructions, even though her mind was thinking about something else entirely.

"He...will he even let me see him?" she asked quietly.

"He does not have a choice."

"Can I see him now?"

Snape sighed, "It is not up to me. It is between the two of you."

Hermione nodded.

"I will come back tomorrow," Snape said, then looked at her bracelet, "You can call me if it is an emergency."

She nodded again, her eyes escaping towards the door that led to Lucius' bedroom.

Snape did not say anything else, probably noticing her lack of attention. He left, walking down the hallway and disappearing from sight.

Hermione immediately moved towards Lucius' bedroom, stopping for a second to take a deep breath.

Then she entered the room, her eyes landing on he person in the bed.

Lucius.

It shocked her to see him like that. He was wearing a dark robe and his chest was revealed. Hermione could not help but grimace at the cuts covering his skin. If they seemed painful, she could only guess how they _felt_ like. But the thing that bothered her the most was that bandage round both his eyes.

Snape's words terrified her. Lucius could not stay blind. It was not happening. It was _impossible_.

"Mudblood?" he called out.

"Y-Yes?"

"What are you doing here?" there was anger in his tone.

At least he was calmer now, she noticed.

Ignoring his question, she asked, "How are you feeling?"

"None of your business," he snapped, "Leave. I should have Severus lock you in your bedroom."

"H-He needs me. I am to administer the potions to you and apply the salve - "

"You will do no such thing," he interrupted her, "Return to your room."

"Lucius, I'm staying," she said, trying to sound strong.

"I am ordering you to leave."

"S-Snape said there is a chance of you...of you not being..." she could not even finish the question.

His whole body tensed up, "That is not even a possibility. I will not become a weak little creature, depending on others. Like you were."

"I hope so," she whispered, slowly approaching the bed.

"I can hear you, you are getting closer," he said, "Obey and go back to your room."

"I-I want to stay here, I promise to be quiet - "

"No! I said _leave_."

"Lucius - "

He forced a smirk, "Are you perhaps concerned? Worried? Why would you care about me?"

"I-"

"Perhaps," he continued, "You are here because you want to see me dead. I am sorry to disappoint, but I am not going anywhere."

"I'm here because...I want you to get better."

He let out a laugh, "Do stop being pathetic, Mudblood. And stop wasting my time."

"Why are you being stubborn?"

"Why are you forcing your company on me?" he asked, "I wish to be alone. And do not expect your disobedience to pass unpunished when I recover."

"Lucius, please."

"Mudblood, leave now. Before you get hurt," he spoke quietly, "I am warning you. I _will_ make you leave."

"I know you won't admit it, but...you don't want to be alone. When I was blind, I desperately needed someone's company, something to distract me from the dark, even if it was you."

"Are you...comparing yourself to me?" he drawled.

"Lucius, I remember - "

"Oh, we are sharing memories, are we?" he asked, a cold smirk on his face, "I have one memory. One event that you surely remember."

Hermione stepped closer to him, "Yes?"

"I remember...our first time together. Do you?"

Her throat closed up with disgust, "Don't."

"I have a feeling you forgot about that," his voice was so cold, so emotionless, "Do you remember you begged me to stop? I remember your pathetic tears on my shoulder. I remember the blood. You could not see it, being blind, but I saw it. The evidence that I took something from you that you could never ever get back. Do you remember?"

Hermione backed away from the bed, away from him and his cold voice. She was shaking, she never liked to think about that particular memory and obviously he knew that. And decided to use it against her.

"Or that time against the wall?" he asked, his words cutting through her like a knife, "I can still feel your small hands trying to push me away."

Hermione could not stand it anymore, she turned around and flew out of the room. She ran until she reached the stairs, then she collapsed down, breathing heavily.

How could he?

How could he talk about such things with absolutely no remorse? Was he truly that evil?

She knew why he brought those things up, he knew exactly what would make her leave him alone and he used it.

He was right.

But she needed to be stronger than him. She would have to return to his bedroom, she could not disappoint Snape. Somehow she would have to learn to ignore Lucius and his attempts to make her leave.

She had to be stronger.

His words would not hurt her again.

**A/N: Hello! This chapter is shorter than usually, but hopefully it is interesting enough. So...what will happen to our dear Lucius? ;) What do you think should happen?**


	16. Chapter 16

**~ chapter 16 ~**

It was morning. And it was snowing.

One look through the window and one might feel as if in a fairytale.

But Hermione did not have the time to bother with that.

She was still sitting on the stairs.

Such silence.

The Manor could be a horrible place if you live in it by yourself. All those rooms, all those hallways, all those portraits, but no real person.

It seemed cold.

At least to Hermione.

The whole night went by and no one bothered her which was a bit of a surprise. She could have done anything, _gone_ anywhere and no one would stop her. Did Lucius even care where she was? Did he care that she could have been snooping around the Manor?

Obviously not.

He had bigger problems to think about.

She was still hurt and disgusted by his reaction when she offered to help him. Of course, she expected him to be against the idea, but she did not expect such cruelty and perversion from him.

How foolish of her.

Still, she had to ignore his attitude and do as Snape instructed her.

Slowly, she stood up and walked to his room. Before she approached the door, she stopped, unsure if she wanted to enter. Perhaps it was not such a good idea. Perhaps Snape could find someone else to take care of him. The last thing she needed was Lucius insulting her again, she did not want his rage upon her.

She was such a coward.

Taking a deep breath, she decided to try again. She would be stronger this time and he would not be able to push her away that easily.

She knocked softly on the door, but no reply came from inside the room.

Was he still sleeping?

Quietly, she pushed the door open and slipped inside.

He was awake, sitting on the bed, his back turned to her.

"Pippy, I told you I do not wish to have breakfast," he snarled, "How many times do I have to repeat it to you?"

Hermione froze at his cold voice, but then forced herself to speak, "I-It's me."

He visibly tensed, but did not turn towards her.

"What are you doing here?" he demanded, calm, yet angry, "I told you to stay in your room."

"I am to give you the potions that Snape left here and apply the salve over your burns," she spoke, emotionless.

"I do not need your help," he replied, dismissive, "I can have Severus come here."

"He said that he won't be able to be here every day, he has other responsibilities," she explained, still afraid to approach the bed.

"Well, then I can do it myself. I am not paralyzed."

"How...how would you know which potion is which?" she knew that question was risky.

His breath caught in his throat and he was silent for a few long moments.

Hermione took that as a sign to approach him, slowly. He was wearing a robe and she could see the wounds on his front. It did not look pretty.

"I-I'll go my room as soon as you take the potions," she said quietly, noticing his hands were clenched in fists.

"Why are you doing this?"

"Because," she answered, "Snape asked me to."

"Is that the only reason?"

"What do you want to know?"

It was obvious he was avoiding the subject that interested him the most. And she knew exactly what it was that he wanted to ask, but did not dare.

Finally, he spoke, "Where are the damn potions?"

Hermione quickly grabbed the first potion from the nightstand, uncorked it and handed it to him, "The Purple one, needs to be taken once a day."

Noticing he was not making a move to take the potion from her, she cursed at her stupidity and brought the potion to his right hand, "Here."

He took it from her quickly, then swallowed it all in one gulp, making a disgusted face once he was finished. Hermione took the empty vial from him and handed him another potion, "The Blue one, needs to be taken twice a day."

He drank it quickly and threw the empty vial onto the bed.

"There," he said coldly, "Now you can go."

"Umm," she started, "The...the healing salve."

"No."

"But - "

"I said _no_, Mudblood."

"Your wounds need to be attended to."

"I can do it myself."

She sighed, "Lucius, I am not enjoying this either."

"It does not seem like that," he replied.

"Do you want to have scars all over your chest?" she asked, raising her voice a bit.

"_I can do it myself_," he repeated, his tone colder. "My hands are still working."

"It has to be spread over your burns _only_, not the healthy skin," she explained, noticing how his lips formed a thin line as he lost himself in his thoughts.

"This is ridiculous," he spat after a moment, opening his robes further apart and leaning back in the bed.

Hermione took a deep breath and tried to ignore the uncomfortable feeling that formed inside of her. She concentrated on her task, dipping her fingers in the salve and looking at his chest.

Then she sat on the edge of the bed, close to him.

Lucius could not be more tensed, it seemed as if he was not even breathing.

Deciding to get this over with as soon as possible, she began applying the salve over his burns, slowly and carefully. It did not escape her attention how he hissed in pain at the first contact, but after that no voice could be heard from him.

"D-Do you have injuries anywhere else?" she asked, still applying the salve.

"No," he was barely capable to speak, "Only my front was injured."

She nodded.

The next few moments were spent in an uncomfortable silence.

Hermione caught herself looking at his chest longer than she should. But there was just something about it that caused her temperature to raise. Ignoring the burns, the whole situation felt...erotic. Was that the right word for what she felt? It was so intimate. And he could not see her looking at him in such a way, which was a comfort.

Finally she was done.

What surprised her was that a part of her did not want to be done. Perhaps she could touch him just a bit longer...

Realizing what she was thinking, she immediately got up from the bed, even taking a few steps away from him.

"Done."

She could see slight surprise on his face by her sudden departure.

"Go back to your room and stay there," he then spoke, his voice barely above a whisper.

Hermione stood there for a few moments, trying to control her breathing and simply looking at him. It was strange how even with a bandage over his eyes and burns on his chest, he could seem so elegant, aristocratic and...proud.

She quickly left the room before her mind wandered somewhere else.

ooo

_Hermione, what is the matter with you?_

_You are acting like a hormonal teenager._

_Well, in some way you are a hormonal teenager, but you were always above that._

_Concentrate!_

_Don't think of him in that way._

_It's wrong._

Hermione could feel her inner self screaming at her own stupidity and she did not even try to defend herself.

If she could only stop those strange, unwanted thoughts she had every time she was near Lucius. Where did it come from? Was it the pregnancy? It had to be that, because she could not remember her hormones being so out of control before.

Why was she so attracted to him? He was much older.

And a Death Eater.

It was wrong on so many levels.

She sighed, still pacing up and down the room nervously.

Well.

There was only one option. She had to pull herself together and fight against it.

ooo

"Miss, what would you like for lunch?" the small elf asked, standing in front of Hermione and looking up at her with it's big eyes.

Hermione would be lying if she said she was not surprised by the small creature's visit to her room and it's question. She was never asked about what she would like to eat.

"I-I am allowed to choose?" she asked, not able to hide the surprise.

"Yes," the elf nodded, "Master said so."

Hermione's eyes went even wider. Did she hear right?

"Umm," she started, the new situation completely unfamiliar to her, "Well...I'll have...whatever he's having."

"Master is not eating."

"What? Why?"

"Master only said no lunch for him."

Hermione nodded, "Alright, just bring me what you had in mind for today. Thank you."

"But what do you wish - "

"It doesn't matter, really," she smiled and the elf smiled back before quickly disappearing.

Once she was left alone, she took a deep breath, thinking hard about what she should do. Lucius was rejecting food and that was not a good thing. She had an idea of why he might be acting that way, but was it really her place to confront him? Perhaps she should just mind her own business.

But as always, she could not just stand there and do nothing.

Besides, it was time he took the Blue potion again. That could be a good excuse of what she was doing in his room again.

ooo

She hesitated for some long moments before finally softly knocking and entering.

He was still in the bed, almost the same position he was in when she left a few hours ago.

His head snapped towards her, "Mudblood?"

Hermione let out a shaky breath, "Yes. How did you know?"

"You...you breath loudly when you are nervous," he explained, "Also, you are the only person in this house beside me that opens doors to enter."

"Oh."

"What is it that you want?"

It did not escape her attention that he was slightly calmer than the last time she saw him. At least he was not throwing her out of the room.

"I-I heard that you don't want anything for lunch."

He snorted, "I am rolling my eyes at this very moment, unfortunately you are unable to see it."

"Lucius - "

"I was thinking of replacing that elf, it talks too much."

"Don't. It's my fault," she approached the bed.

"Alright, what is it that you want?" now he was impatient.

"Are you...refusing to eat because...you don't want to embarrass yourself?" she asked, quietly, preparing herself for his anger.

"_Excuse me_?"

She sighed, "I remember when I was blind...at first I didn't want to eat, because I didn't want to feel...incapable of doing it. I didn't want to do something wrong and humillliate myself."

"How touching," he sneered.

"Perhaps a sandwich?" she asked, ignoring his comment.

"Lucius Malfoy will not eat a sandwich," he said, his voice hard.

"Perhaps something else then?"

"Mudblood," he drawled, "What I eat or do not eat is my business. Not yours."

Hermione remained silent, a part of her amazed at how easily he acted like a bastard even while injured. Even if he was not looking at her, if his eyes were not cutting through her like a knife, his voice had the same effect. Perhaps even worse.

At loss of what to say, she decided to leave him alone. He obviously did not need or want her help. Quietly she turned and left the room.

ooo

"Miss!"

Hermione stormed out of the bathroom at hearing the elf's panicking voice.

"What is it?" she asked, worried, "Is it Lucius?"

"N-No, the Master is alright, resting. But there is someone else. A very strange man is in the study and does not wants to leave."

"What? Who?"

She walked past the elf and into the hallway, stopping when she reached the stairs.

"Miss should not go there, but Pippy does not knows what to do. Pippy does not wants to bother Master," the elf explained, running towards Hermione.

"I-" she started, then trailed off.

She should not play a hero. It was dangerous. That man could be anyone. Perhaps the best would be to call Snape. But she could not bother Snape every time something goes wrong. She needed to learn to solve problems by herself.

Taking a deep breath, she turned towards the elf, "What was that man like?"

"Tall, dark, young. Pale. Very pale. He was at the party and was asked to leave by Master. Pippy accompanied him out."

_Anton._

It had to be.

Only two persons were asked to leave that evening.

"I-I'll go deal with him," Hermione said, heading down the stairs.

"That is not a good idea, Miss!" the elf called out after her, but Hermione did not stop.

She made her way towards the study room, trying to stay calm.

There was nothing to be worried about.

_Of course not, Hermione. It is perfectly safe for you to walk into a room while a vampire is there._

She tried to push those thoughts out of her head. Anton obviously wanted something and at the moment Lucius was not capable of dealing with him, so _she_ had to do it.

She pushed the doors open and entered the room.

ooo

Anton immediately turned away from the window, facing her. At first there was a surprise on his face, followed by a smile.

"Well," he spoke, "This is a lovely surprise."

When she remained silent, he continued, "Do not get me wrong, I am happy to see you, but I was not expecting you. Where is Mr. Malfoy?"

"He is...currently unavailable."

His eyes narrowed, "How so?"

Hermione had a feeling he was pretending, there was just something on his face that was off.

So she crossed her arms and raised her eyebrows at him, "You probably heard about the accident. Do not play ignorant."

He smirked, raising his hands up, "I apologize. It was not my intention to...play with you."

"Why are you here?" she asked, "To check on him?"

She kept close to the door, her body ready to start running away any second.

He struggled with words at first, but then only nodded, "Yes."

"Well," Hermione started, "He is doing well. He should be his old self in a couple of days."

"That is...nice to know."

"You're lying," she immediately shot back, observing his face, "You are not pleased by that."

Anton looked at her, then forced a smile, "Let's drop that subject."

"No," she said, determined, "I want to know what your problem with Lucius is."

"Is the fact that he is a Death Eater, a murderer, not good enough reason to not get along with him?"

"_Oh please_," she replied, a bit annoyed, "You are no better. As far as I know you are _also_ a Death Eater and a murderer."

He tensed a bit at those words, but his voice was calm when he spoke, "Why do you feel the need to attack me? All I want is to have a civil conversation with you. I am not a danger to you."

"You bit me."

"You are alive, are you not?"

Hermione sighed loudly, "Why are you still here? You found out what you wanted to know."

"That...is not the only reason I came here," he said quietly, "I was hoping to see you again."

That caught her unprepared, "What...what are you saying?"

"I am saying that I was hoping to see you again," he repeated, slower this time.

Hermione moved closer to the door, her hand on the handle.

Suddenly Anton laughed at her, "You should see your face. I won't bite, I promise, at least for this evening."

His promise did nothing to help her and she was still as tense as before.

"Why don't you leave? It's late...and I shouldn't be..._we_ shouldn't be here," she said to him.

"Why are you with him?" he suddenly asked.

"What do you mean?"

"Why are you with Lucius Malfoy? I find it fascinating," he did not move his eyes away from her.

Hermione let out a short breath, "I'm glad my life fascinates you," her words were dripping with sarcasm.

"I only meant - "

She interrupted him, "My life is not fascinating to me, it's a torture."

"I apologize."

That calmed her down a bit. It surprised her how serious he seemed, there was no sign that he was mocking her or anything like that. She could almost feel..._respect_ coming from him and that intrigued her.

"Perhaps we could talk?" he asked.

"I...I don't think that's a good idea."

"All I ask for is a conversation," he tried again, "Please?"

Hermione thought for a moment, then quickly shook her head, "No, I don't think so."

He sighed, but nodded, "Alright. How about one question?"

"Fine," she agreed, surprised at how she was unable to hate that man in front of her. She was even having trouble being annoyed by him. It was all his fault, why did he have to be nice to her? He was a Death Eater, he was supposed to be evil and insulting.

His eyes darkened as he struggled for words, "I almost asked you this question before, but we were interrupted."

"W-What question?"

"I...I need to ask what you know about the death of a certain Death Eater."

Hermione listened patiently.

He continued, "His name was Anthony. Anthony Edeson."

After a long moment, she shook her head, "Doesn't ring a bell," she answered truthfully.

"Are you sure? He was fifty-something, died a couple of months ago, murdered."

Hermione stared at him, "I've never heard of him. Why?"

It did not escape her attention that he seemed disappointed by her answer, but he covered it quickly, "Well, no harm in asking."

"Who is he?" she wanted to know.

"It does not matter," he walked towards her, "It was nice to see you again. Give Mr. Malfoy my best regards."

"But - " she tried, but he walked right past her and exited the room.

_What the hell?_

That was the first question that came to Hermione's mind.

Who was that Anton? What did he want? And who was that man that was murdered? Why was his death so important?

Perhaps she should ask Lucius. He had to know something. But would he tell her? The answer was obvious.

ooo

Slowly the day was coming to an end.

Hermione visited Lucius' bedroom again, just to give him the potion he had to take. It could be seen on his face that he was not glad she was there, disturbing his peace, but he accepted her help without any cruel remarks.

There were actually no words between the two of them.

Almost like a silent acceptance of each other.

They were both silent and Hermione left the room after a few short minutes.

She had fought with herself about asking Lucius about that man Anton mentioned, but decided against it. If she asked, then she would have to explain why she agreed to see Anton and that would turn the conversation in a completely different direction.

As she lay in bed, she could not help but wonder what was it that Lucius was hiding from her. She could remember one event where Lucius was very worried about what Anton had told her. Why? Could it be connected to the murdered man?

Perhaps she was over-reacting. The name of that man was completely unfamiliar to her. She could not be connected to him if she did not even know him.

But Lucius obviously _was_ connected to him.

Why?

Fortunately all the serious thoughts disappeared once she closed her eyes and sleep took over her.

ooo

Hermione yawned as she walked out of the bathroom, running a hand through her hair.

What time it was?

It annoyed her how there was not one clock in her room.

But it had to be early in the morning. At least she had a feeling it was.

Was Lucius awake? Probably.

She sighed as she realized she had to visit him again. Being in his company was never pleasant, especially when he was in a horrible mood.

Well, she better get it over with. The sooner the better.

ooo

She knocked on the doors and slowly entered.

"Lucius?"

He was not in the room.

Hermione looked around and then the bathroom doors opened and he slowly walked out.

"What are you doing here?" he demanded.

"You know what."

"I am going to ask Severus to remove this bloody bandage, my eyes are perfectly fine by now, I am sure of it," he said as he slowly made his way to the bed.

Hermione made a move to help him, but she stopped herself in time, realizing he would not appreciate her help.

Finally he reached the bed and sat on it, taking a deep breath.

"Hurry up," he hissed, opening his robe.

Hermione quickly grabbed the healing salve and began applying it, noticing his burns were healing quickly. All the evidence of the explosion should be gone in two or three days.

But his eyes...

"Must your fingers always be so damn cold?" he snapped.

She answered him by touching one wound more roughly than she should and he hissed in pain.

With a satisfied smile, she quickly finished her work, then handed him the potion.

She did not even wait for him to drink it, she quickly left the room, closing the door.

Why was it so hard for her to remain emotionless while being close to him? She really needed to get her feelings in order. No, not _feelings_, more like hormones. She would only embarrass herself if Lucius realized how his presence affected her.

She stood in the hallway for a minute, taking deep breaths to pull herself together. Just as she was about to enter her own bedroom, a voice stopped her.

"Girl."

Hermione turned around immediately, a gasp escaping her. What shocked her then was that there was no one in the hallway with her. She was alone. But then who - ?

"Up here," the voice said.

Hermione raised her head and noticed a woman in one of the portraits was looking directly at her.

No matter how long she lived in the Wizarding World, the moving pictures and speaking portraits always amazed her.

"Y-Yes?" she asked, a bit unsure.

The blonde woman smiled weakly at her, then motioned towards the door on her left, "May I have a word, please?"

Hermione was not so sure it was such a good idea, but the expression on the woman's face told her she would not accept a _no_ for an answer. So she nodded and made her way towards the room.

ooo

It was another study room. Hermione remembered she was once before in this room. A few weeks ago when she was snooping around in the house. And she knew this was the room Lucius was often in, talking to...someone.

She looked up and noticed there was only one portrait in it.

The blonde woman appeared and Hermione fought hard to hold the eye contact.

"We've met before," the woman said.

Hermione noticed how elegant she was and the way in which she spoke was...similar to Lucius'.

"I know who you are," she said quietly, "You are Narcissa Malfoy."

The woman nodded, "And I know who you are."

Hermione raised her eyebrows in surprise.

"You are Hermione Granger," she continued, "You are that girl who is living with Lucius."

"Well...that's not the entire truth. Do you know how I ended up here?"

"I do," Narcissa replied, "Lucius told me everything."

"He _did_?"

Hermione had trouble believing Lucius would tell his wife that he had kidnapped a girl. Treated her like slave. Used her. It was then she started wondering if Narcissa knew everything. Did Lucius tell her everything that happened? About _them_? About the pregnancy?

"At first I did not agree with you being here," the woman spoke, "I do not agree with torture and I knew exactly why Lucius brought you here," then she looked down, "To avenge the death of our son."

Hermione tensed, not knowing how to react. Should she defend herself? Or perhaps say she was sorry for what happened to Draco?

Finally she decided to remain silent.

"I could hear you, you know," Narcissa said, "A couple of times your screams could be heard throughout the entire Manor. I tried to reason with Lucius, but he would not listen to me. He is...still alive. Emotions are still very much alive for him."

Hermione nearly snorted at that. Lucius and emotions? Those two words could not even be used in the same sentence.

"But now it's different, is it not?" Narcissa asked quietly.

"W-What do you mean?"

"He is different with you. He has changed, I can see it," she replied, "He talks to me. About you."

Hermione's eyes widened a bit at that. She did not expect Lucius would discuss her with anyone, especially with his wife. He was, after all, cheating her in some way. Or at least her memory. Even though Hermione did not want to admit it or even think about it, she was Lucius' lover. Or his toy.

"What does he say? A-About me, I mean," Hermione asked, her voice trembling a bit.

The woman smiled weakly, "It would not be fair of me to tell you, would it?"

Hermione looked down and shook her head.

"Help him."

That sentence brought Hermione's head up again and for a second she wondered if she heard right or if her mind was playing with her. But when she noticed the sad expression on Narcissa's face all doubts were gone.

"How can I help him?"

"I wish I had the answer."

"But - "

The woman cut her off, "I love my husband. And I do not want him to spend his life in sadness, hate and violence, even if that means he spends it with... someone like you."

Hermione could hear the insult in that sentence, but she tried to ignore it. The Purebloods would always look down to Halfbloods and Muggleborns and there was no point in arguing with a portrait.

"I should go," she said, not looking up at the portrait as she exited the room.

ooo

Could Lucius Malfoy be saved?

Was there even a possibility of a redemption for him?

Could he change his life?

Hermione did not have the answers to those questions.

All she was sure of was that she could not help him if he himself did not want to be saved.

What was the point in thinking about redeeming him if he was perfectly fine with being a Death Eater?

ooo

It was towards the middle of the day when Hermione heard voices from downstairs. And that never meant a good thing. From what she could tell someone was arguing.

Knowing that it was not something to be ignored, she slowly made her way downstairs to check.

"...demand to see him..."

"...resting..."

"...will not mind..."

Hermione reached the stairs and then suddenly froze.

Patricia.

That woman was standing there, arguing with the elf.

And then her eyes snapped towards Hermione and she smiled.

That smile literally sent shivers down Hermione's body.

"Leave," the woman said to the elf, "I want to talk to that little girl."

Hermione could not move. Was it because of the shock? The fear?

The elf looked helpless and unsure of what to do.

"Are you going to come down or do I have to come up?" Patricia asked, raising her eyebrows.

Hermione forced herself to speak, "You are not welcome here."

"Is that so? And who told you that?"

Hermione realized how dangerous the situation was. The woman spilled champagne all over her the last time she saw her and had tried to kill her not even two weeks ago. And now she was alone with her again. Lucius was in his bedroom and even if he knew what was happening it was doubtful he would stand a change against that crazy woman.

Hermione needed help.

Quickly she brought her left hand to that bracelet that Snape gave her and she rubbed the small stone.

Once.

Twice.

Three times.

She rubbed it a couple of times more to let Snape know it was really an emergency.

"Did Lucius tell you I am not welcomed anymore?" Patricia asked, looking up at Hermione.

"He does not want anything with you anymore," she answered, slowly making her way down the stairs.

"Well, darling, I am sorry for disappointing you, but he obviously lied."

"No."

Patricia smiled, dragging her tongue across her lower lip, "He had been visiting me every night. And what satisfying visits those were," then she raised her eyebrows at Hermione, "But last night he did not come to me. And that has me worried. Has something happened to him?"

"Y-You're lying," Hermione managed to say, but her throat was already closing up.

What if she was telling the truth? Was it possible?

"I am not," Patricia shook her head, "Believe me, if I were lying, then I would be trying to kill you at this very moment. But Lucius has assured me you are nothing to him."

Hermione felt as if her world was spinning around her. She trusted him. She actually believed he would end his affair with Patricia for her safety. Were all that just lies? Was he playing with her?

"G-Good," Hermione replied, forcing a smile, "Because I don't have anything with him. Nor do I want to have."

"Is that so?" the woman looked at her with interest.

"Yes."

"Well, I do not care about you. I care about what _Lucius_ feels towards you. And I think I have find a way to discover that and...humiliate you which is always entertaining."

The smirk on Patricia's face worried Hermione but before she had a chance to react, the woman pulled out her wand, pointing it at her.

Hermione stepped back, her heart beating like crazy.

"Do not worry, I will not kill you," Patricia assured her, then smiled again, "Officium Mortalis."

Half expecting the pain to hit her, Hermione could not believe when nothing happened. At least nothing painful. She did, however, notice small dark orbs around her.

"What is this?" she demanded.

"I, who cast this spell, order you, the receiver, to...please Lucius Malfoy."

"W-What?"

Patricia smirked, "With your...mouth."

Then she waved her wand at Hermione and the orbs disappeared.

Hermione just stood there, speechless and confused.

"Have a nice day," Patricia smiled then simply walked away.

"What did you do to me?" Hermione called out after her, but the woman did not look back.

Soon she was out of the sight.

What did just happen?

ooo

"Granger!" Severus Snape strode towards her, "I came as quickly as I could. What is the problem?"

Hermione looked up at him, realizing she had not moved from the spot ever since Patricia left.

"I-I...That woman was here," she answered.

"What woman? That widow?"

Nodding, she swallowed hard, trying to find her voice, "She's gone now."

"What happened? What did she want? Did she do something?"

"No...well, yes...I-I'm not sure."

"Granger!" Snape raised his voice, "Concentrate. What happened?"

Hermione looked up at him, "She cast some sort of a spell on me...but I don't feel any different."

Snape narrowed his eyes, "What kind of a spell?"

"I've never heard it before, why haven't I? I read almost every book in library at Hogwarts and I can't remember ever coming across such a spell."

"What did she say? The specific words."

"Officis...Officium Moralis...or Mortalis."

Hermione noticed how Snape's expression changed drastically. He was worried and that was never a good sign.

"It's bad, isn't it?"

He took a deep breath, "That depends. What was the second part?"

"First tell me about that Curse. What does it do?"

"It is Dark Magic, very similar to the Unbreakable Vow."

"W-What?"

"The main difference is that you do not need a person's approval."

"I have to do what she ordered me to?" Hermione could not keep the hysteria out of her voice.

He nodded, "What did she order you to do?"

Hermione quickly looked away, "That...that does not matter."

"What do you mean it _does not matter_? That is the most important part."

"Are you sure the spell worked? Perhaps she was just...playing with me."

Snape pulled his wand from his robes, pointing it at Hermione, making a few motions, his face concentrated as he muttered something under his breath. Hermione just stood there, hugging herself with her arms and hoping he would tell her the good news.

Sadly the grave expression on his face told her everything.

"You do seem to have traces of Dark Magic around yourself."

Hermione took a shaky breath, her eyes wide open in shock and disbelief.

"Granger, what did she order you to do?"

"You have to talk to Lucius," she suddenly said, "You have to explain everything to him."

"First I need an explanation from you," he demanded, but Hermione shook her head.

"I-I can't tell you."

"Granger - "

"Please, don't make me. It's nothing...serious...or connected to..." she took a deep breath, looking down, "It's between Lucius and I."

Snape nodded, "Alright, I will talk to Lucius. I will say I decided to pay a visit to check on him and I found you here and then you told me what happened."

"Thank you."

He turned and walked up the stairs to Lucius' bedroom and Hermione followed, still not believing what was happening. She felt as if it was all a nightmare and she would soon wake up.

Only it wasn't.

She waited outside while Snape talked to Lucius.

_What had she gotten herself into? _

_Don't panic._

_Surely there has to be another way. You will not have to go through with it. _

_Calm down, Hermione._

ooo

Finally Snape walked out of the room, closing the doors behind him. He was wearing a serious expression and Hermione's heart sank a little.

"He demands to talk to you, immediately," he said.

Nodding, she asked, "What did he say?"

"He is...upset."

_Of course he is._

"Granger," Snape started, his voice low, "I cannot force you to tell me what the order was. But can I trust you to go through with it? You are a valuable part and we would not like to lose you."

Hermione remained silent, simply staring at him, her eyes watering a bit. Could she promise him? She was in so much trouble. The situation she was forced into was...disgusting and Hermione was not sure she was capable of doing what was demanded of her.

"Granger?"

"I'll try," she quickly said, then almost ran past him into Lucius' bedroom, wanting to escape from Snape and his questions.

But deep down she know she was escaping towards something much more uncomfortable.

Lucius.

ooo

She closed the doors behind her and then simply stood there, her hands still on the handle.

Lucius was sitting on the bed, facing away from her. He did not even move when she entered the room.

Silence.

All Hermione could hear was her own breathing.

"You insufferable girl," he finally spoke.

"Lucius - "

"Why did you not stay in your room like I told you to?" he demanded, turning towards her.

Hermione could see he was paler than usually and was positive her own face was the same color. Maybe even paler.

What could she tell him?

That she was curious to see who was downstairs? And when she saw who it was it was already too late?

Stupid. She truly was stupid.

"You foolish girl," he spoke, his voice burning with rage, "You will be locked in your room from now on. Or perhaps I should throw you in the dungeons, will that teach you a lesson?"

"I'm sorry," she whispered.

"Tell me," he demanded angrily.

"W-What?"

"What did she order you to do?"

"N-No, it's..." she was completely lost for words, "I can't."

"Why not?"

"There has to be another way, _something_."

"There is not. That is why it is considered one of the most dangerous curses," he replied, bitterly.

Hermione took a deep breath, "What if...I refuse to obey? What happens then?"

He smirked, "Torture. Horrible torture. Those who have seen it, say it looks as if a person is suffering from the Cruciatus Curse. And only death can end it."

A small cry escaped Hermione and she had a feeling there was no air in the room.

"Now tell me, what were you ordered to do," Lucius demanded.

Hermione realized there was no other option. There was no turning back.

She whispered, "Please you."

"Speak louder," he snapped at her.

"Please you," she repeated, her cheeks burning.

"_Please me_?" at first he was confused, then realization showed in his face, "And how exactly are you supposed to do that?"

"My mouth," she whispered, barely hearing herself.

"What was that?"

"My mouth," she said again, stronger.

Silence.

Hermione wanted to die at that very moment.

"I see," he finally spoke.

"And...and I won't do it."

"Then you will suffer the consequences. The Cruciatus Curse until the end of your life."

Shaking her head, she insisted, "No, there has to be another way - "

"How many times do I have to tell you?"

"I can't..."

"You _can_ and you _will_. It is your fault we are put into this situation."

"I'm sorry."

"You being sorry does not change anything, it only adds to my anger at you, Mudblood," his voice was so cold.

"W-When?" she asked quietly.

"A day. If the deed is not done in a day..." he let that sentence trail off.

"A day," Hermione repeated, not actually believing what was happening.

"I suggest we get it over with as soon as possible, preferably now."

Hermione looked up at him, "N-Now? I can't...I need time - "

"Do stop being childish."

She shut her mouth and simply glared at him, a look of hopelessness on her face.

A slight smirk appeared on Lucius' face, "I have to say, Patricia is one twisted woman. I did not expect this from her."

Hermione tensed, remembering the woman's words about Lucius still visiting her. Was it true? Realizing now was not the right time to ask, she pushed that thought aside.

He sighed, "Am I right to assume you have never done this before?"

"Of course I haven't!"

"You act as if I insulted you, Mudblood."

Hermione remained silent, biting her tongue.

"Give me a f-few minutes," she asked, fighting the urge to escape.

He said nothing and she took that as a permission.

One minute passed.

Then another.

And another.

Hermione was not feeling any better. If anything, she was even more nervous and...sick.

Another minute.

"On your knees in front of me, Mudblood," he suddenly ordered.

His words made her sick.

But it was probably a good thing he decided to speak. If it were up to her, she would never start.

Still, she could not help but tense at the coldness in his voice. She did not like it when he treated her like nothing more than a slave.

But she decided to let that pass. The deed had to be done and the sooner the better. Slowly walking over to him, she had to blink the tears of humiliation away. For a moment she was glad he could not see her, she would not be able to stand his cold eyes on her.

She did as she was told, carefully kneeling on the floor in front of him.

He opened his robes and she noticed he was wearing black underpants. She swallowed hard when her eyes wet directly to that particular bulge.

She could not believe what was happening.

Immediately she averted her eyes, trying to calm herself down.

_Breath, Hermione._

_Breath._

Without a word he pulled the material down, letting it drop to his ankles before kicking it away.

Hermione closed her eyes, her heart threatening to jump out of her ribcage.

And she thought the evening would be normal and boring.

She could slap herself at that very moment. Why did she have to go downstairs? Why did she have to complicate everything for herself?

"Between my knees," he ordered, pulling her out of her thoughts.

Hermione slowly obeyed and once she was settled, she heard his voice again.

"Open your eyes."

Immediately she looked up at his face, "How...how did you know?"

There was a slight smirk on is face, "I know _you_."

Blushing terribly, she forced herself to look down.

Her lips went suddenly dry.

It...it was not that bad.

She expected a...a monster.

And it was not that horrible.

Still, it seemed huge and...dangerous and she had no idea how she would be able to -

Lucius exhaled sharply and Hermione could not tell whether it was from irritation or impatience.

"W-What now?" she asked quietly.

She tried her best to ignore the situation and the position she was in. It was humiliating. And sick.

And...intriguing.

The curiosity in her forced her to look at his... thing again, this time observing it with interest. She was thankful Lucius could not see her, because she would die of embarrassment.

"Well?" he snapped, "I would like this to be over as soon as possible."

"S-So would I," she managed to say.

Taking a deep breath, she tried to pull herself together and when she exhaled, she noticed Lucius tensed.

"For God's sake, girl, touch me," he said to her.

"H-How?" she was trembling horribly and it did not help that he was snapping at her.

"Give me your hand."

She did as she was told.

Immediately he guided her hand to the right spot.

"Here," he said. His voice was so cold and irritated.

It felt...warm. And hard. Her hand did not move at first, she just held it where he had put it.

"Should I - " she tried to ask, but failed miserably.

"I think this is the time you start using your mouth."

Hermione could feel her throat close with fear and disgust and embarrassment.

Then she decided to just do it. She was making it harder for herself by delaying it.

Tentatively, lightly, she moved closer to him and touched her tongue to the skin of his manhood, just at the base.

His entire body tensed, but he made no sound.

She made a few experimenting licks before pulling away.

It was not that bad.

She had heard horror stories from other girls while at Hogwarts, but that did not seem to be the case with Lucius Malfoy.

It did not smell nor did it have a disgusting taste.

Slowly she brought her mouth down again, gently kissing the tip, twirling her tongue around.

And then she heard something that made her stop for a moment.

He moaned.

That actually sent a dark thrill through her and for some strange reason she felt the need to hear him moan again.

Moan for her.

She concentrated at the head of his shaft, realizing that he was very sensitive about it.

Before she could stop herself, she looked up at him, desperately needing to see his face, to see what he was feeling, how he was reacting.

Lucius' jaw was clenched and it was obvious he was trying to keep an impassive face.

After a few more moments, he moaned again, and this time pushed his hips forward to meet her.

Suddenly he spoke, "Take more of it in your mouth."

Hermione noticed his voice was hoarse and was not as calm and cold as before, even though he tried to cover it.

Then she did as he instructed, taking a bit more of him, she could feel him stretching her mouth to the point where it was slightly uncomfortable.

He moaned again, this time louder.

Hermione closed her eyes, concentrating on the task.

Then his hands were in her hair, "Breath through your nose," he whispered before pulling her head down, forcing her to take more of him.

God, how more of him is there?

Her eyes watered, and she gagged a little bit and he pulled away immediately, giving her a few moments to recover before repeating the process.

"Relax," she heard him hiss.

His body jerked uncontrollably and then he pulled her head down tightly onto his shaft and thrust it deep into her mouth.

"Use your tongue," he ordered while pushing into her mouth and moaning, his breath coming out in short gasps.

Hermione tried to obey and keep up with him, but all the control was in his hands once again. She grabbed his thighs for support, trying to remain relaxed as he instructed her to.

She tried to ignore what was happening, she would not let herself to think about it. There will be a lot time later to think and be disgusted.

She made a sound in the back of her throat and his whole body seemed to be affected by the vibrations.

"Mudblood," he whispered as if in pain and she looked up at him to see if he was alright.

Was she doing something wrong?

After a few more thrusts, he suddenly pulled out and pushed her away before letting out a loud moan and breathing heavily.

Not even looking at him, Hermione quickly ran to the bathroom, washing her hands, her face and her mouth. She expected she would throw up, but strangely she was not sick.

She splashed cold water on her face to cool down.

She was burning up.

Looking at the doors, she realized she did not want to come out. Ever. She did not want to face Lucius after that.

Could she stay in the bathroom forever?

She was still shaking horribly and her knees were hurting from... Immediately pushing that thought out of her head, she dropped down onto the floor.

And then she waited.

She waited until she felt ready to go out.

And that did not seem to be anytime soon.

**A/N: Another chapter! It's getting more adult and dark, just as I said it would. Hope you will continue reading.:) Really appreciate all of you who read and those who review!**


	17. Chapter 17

**Wounds of The Soul**

**chapter 17**

Hermione knew she was being foolish, but at that moment she did not care.

She could not leave the bathroom and face him. Not after what happened.

She washed her face again.

Looking back at it, she had to admit it was not as horrible as she imagined it would be, but it was still one of the most humiliating moments in her entire life.

How long had she been in the bathroom?

A few minutes? Or an hour?

She completely lost track of time.

There was no sound coming from the bedroom. Was he asleep?

If only he was, so that she could slip out of the room unnoticed.

Finally, she gathered her courage and walked over to the doors, mentally preparing herself to walk out.

She stood there for a long moment, her hand on the handle.

Putting on a strong face, she pulled the door open and walked back into the bedroom, hoping he would not hear her.

But he did.

He was still in the same position on the bed, but he was dressed for which Hermione was thankful. She had seen enough of his body tonight.

His head turned towards her as he heard her and then his lips curled up in a small smirk.

Hermione could not handle it.

Not wanting to hear any of his insults or remarks, she ran out of the room before he had a chance to say anything.

ooo

Finally she was safe inside her bedroom.

Without thinking she threw herself onto the bed, pulling a sheet over her whole body, wishing she could just crawl into a dark hole and stay there.

ooo

The next morning Hermione did not want to leave the comfort of her bed.

She did not want to see anyone.

She did not want to speak to anyone.

But she had a responsibility. She had to take care of Lucius whether he liked it or not. Snape had given her a task and she could not refuse simply because of what happened yesterday.

So she pulled herself out of the bed, putting on a strong face.

A couple of minutes later she was still standing in her room, her feet not able to move. Her whole body was resisting, refusing to face Lucius again. She knew she could not avoid him forever, but how about a few days? She needed time for herself, she needed to get rid of that awful feeling.

She had been used.

And not by Lucius. If she was honest with herself, she had to admit it was not his fault. It was that woman's. That woman _violated_ her, forced her to do something she did not want to do.

Hermione was _angry_.

She was not sure of what she would do to Patricia next time she saw her. A simple slap would not be a punishment horrible enough for her. That vile woman deserved at least ten doses of the Cruciatus Curse.

But that had to wait.

There were more important things ahead of Hermione. And one of those things was seeing Lucius.

Finally she forced herself to leave her bedroom.

ooo

Even though Lucius' bedroom was next to hers, it took Hermione ten minutes to finally pull the doors open.

As soon as she entered the room, she wanted to run away. Somehow she forced herself to stay where she was.

It seemed as if Lucius was waiting for her.

He was in his usual position on the bed, his head turned towards her.

Without a word, Hermione walked quickly over to him, taking the right potion from the nightstand.

"Here," she placed it into his hand, careful not to touch him.

Then she cleared her throat and looked at the jar of healing salve. She did _not_ want to do this.

"Are you avoiding me?" Lucius suddenly spoke.

Hermione remained silent, hoping to leave the room as soon as possible.

His robe was opened and she could see the scars were healing nicely. Perhaps this was her last visit to his bedroom. At least she hoped so.

Quickly she began applying the salve over his scars, her fingers shaking. The last time she was this close to him, she was - .

"I asked you a question, Mudblood," his tone was colder this time.

Hermione froze, her hands stopping, but still no voice came from her. Just as she was about to pull away from him, he grabbed her wrist.

"Let go of me," she demanded weakly, trying to free herself.

"No."

She stopped struggling, taking a deep breath, "What do you want?"

"I want you to answer my question."

"Am I avoiding you?" she repeated, "What do you think?"

"I think you are being childish."

"Excuse me?"

"_You are being childish_," he repeated, slowly as if he was really talking to a child.

That angered her and she pulled her wrist away from him, "I have every right to be..." she did not finish that sentence, not knowing how to describe herself. Actually, she _did_ know how to describe it.

Ashamed. Uncomfortable. Embarrassed. Angry. Mortified. Disgusted.

Suddenly Lucius let out a small chuckle. She did not expect that. Why was he laughing at her? He did not have the right. Of course, he thought she was being childish and immature about it. It was because he had no idea how humiliating it was for her. Could he not understand how wrong it was?

His face got serious again, "Would it help if I say you did well for your first time?"

Her eyes widened, "W-What?"

"It was...pleasurable."

She could not believe him.

"I-I don't care if it was...pleasurable or not! Don't you understand how...how degrading it was?"

"I feel the need to remind you it was your fault."

She bit her lip angrily and then the words escaped her, "It was _your_ fault too."

He leaned away from her, "Explain that."

She was not sure if she should continue or not, but then finally decided to speak, "Are you seeing her? After everything, are you still seeing her?"

"Where did you hear that?"

"I-It doesn't bother me, you can spend all your time with her if you wish, you can go to her every night."

She only hoped she hid the jealousy in her voice.

"Where did you get that _very_ entertaining idea?" he demanded.

"She told me."

"Oh did she?"

"Lucius," she looked at him.

His jaw hardened and he said nothing.

Silence.

She nodded in understanding, her throat closing up, "I see."

It felt as if something inside of her was ripped apart and she could not understand why. He lied to her. And that hurt. Even though it was ridiculous. He was Lucius Malfoy. What else did she expect from him?

Still, it hurt.

It was a good thing he was unable to see her face, because she could not handle that humiliation as well.

"I did go to her," he finally spoke.

Hermione cleared her throat, "You don't have to explain."

"She is a danger to me," he continued, "I cannot get rid of her. If I were to...do something to her, if I were to make her disappear, I would get a lot of unwanted attention."

"Why are you telling me this?"

"I assured her that you mean nothing to me."

"I know."

"She needs to believe it."

Hermione bit her lip nervously, "What _do_ I mean to you?"

She knew the question was risky. She had asked him that many times in the past and she never got an answer.

By the look on his face she was convinced she would not get one now.

Sighing, she moved to close the jar of healing salve.

"You are not attractive," he finally spoke.

Hermione felt as if he had slapped her across the face, "Well, t-thank you."

There was hurt evident in her voice and she did not care if he heard it. She quickly closed the jar, wanting to be out of the room as soon as possible.

"You are not exceptionally beautiful," he continued and it only added to Hermione's anger and hurt.

"You are not the type of woman men want."

Shaking, she put the jar back to his nightstand and then she suddenly felt his arms around her waist, pulling her to him.

"I want you," he finally spoke, his voice dark and serious.

He was not mocking her or playing with her.

Hermione froze in his arms, "Y-You _want_ me?"

"I want to do things to you, things you cannot even imagine, I want to corrupt you, to posses you."

That did not surprise her. She never expected them to ride into the sunset together. He was not in love with her. Love was something else. They did not like each other's personalities. They had very little to talk about, except for when they were fighting.

But why were they so drawn to one another?

He spoke, his voice low, "I want my name on your lips. _Only mine_."

Hermione could feel her temperature rise, his words were having an effect on her, but it was not what she wanted to hear.

"Lucius - "

"You wanted to know what you mean to me, Mudblood, and now you will know," he drawled, his arms pulling her closer, "Your hair is impossible, but I want my hands in it. Your breasts are small, but I want to feel them. I want..." then it seemed he snapped out of it, almost whispering, "What are you doing to me?"

Hermione was speechless. If only he knew she felt the same way about him. For too long had she hidden the truth from herself.

But was that what she wanted to be?

Lucius Malfoy's mistress? His lover? Someone he only used when he felt the need to?

Suddenly anger shot through him and he pushed her away roughly. Hermione did not expect it and she almost tripped, but caught herself in time.

"Get out," he snarled at her.

Hermione obeyed and ran out of the room, slamming the doors shut.

ooo

She barely made it to the bathroom before dropping to her knees, sickness taking over her. It had been so long since the last time and Hermione thought she was past the morning sickness phase.

Obviously not.

But it was a good thing it happened. It reminded her of something she wanted to forget.

What were they going to do with_ it?_

So much was happening and they had no time to discuss it. But it was not something to push aside and forget about it. Soon both Hermione and Lucius would have to find time and sit down for a serious conversation.

ooo

Later that evening there was a visit from Snape.

Hermione did not expect that and was alarmed that something had happened.

"Everything is fine," he assured her, "I am not supposed to be here, but I needed to see you."

"W-Why?"

"Have you solved the problem?"

Immediately she knew what he was asking.

Blushing, she quickly nodded, "Yes, it's been taken care of."

"Do you mind if I make sure of that?"

"Go ahead," she said quietly.

Neither of them said anything as he waved his wand over her, checking if there were signs of dark magic.

Finally he sighed in relief, "I do not sense anything."

"I told you it's been taken care of, Professor."

Images from last night popped into her mind, but she quickly pushed them away.

Snape looked at her, thoughtfully, "And you still do not wish to tell me what the demands were?"

"No," Hermione answered, perhaps a bit too quickly.

That only caused Snape to be more suspicious, she could see it in his eyes, but thankfully he let that subject pass.

"There is one more thing," he spoke, "Today I will remove Lucius' bandages."

Hermione's eyes widened in shock, "Today?"

"Yes. Hasn't he told you?"

"N-No, he told me nothing," she admitted, that nervous feeling starting to form in the pit of her stomach.

"Well, I figured you would want to know," Snape said, "I should be going now. He is expecting me."

Hermione nodded, afraid to ask the question that was on her mind. What if Lucius' injuries were that severe that his eyesight was lost forever? What then? Blind Lucius would not be a problem to the Resistance.

Snape left the room and Hermione could not even move from the spot where she was standing.

She desperately wanted to be there when the bandages would be removed, but obviously Lucius did not want her there.

All she could do was wait.

ooo

At least an hour passed.

Hermione stood next to the window, observing in silence as it continued to snow. Watching how snow slowly covered the land actually calmed her down and her nerves were not killing her anymore.

Then she heard the doors open.

She was afraid to turn around and see who it was.

And that person was silent too, obviously wanting her to react first.

Taking a deep breath, she turned around.

And then she saw him.

Lucius Malfoy.

He was looking right into her eyes, his sophisticated face wearing that famous smirk of his.

He looked...good.

His hair was in a ponytail, not one hair was out of the place. His robes were magnificent and there was a snake cane in his hand.

There was no sign of weakness on him. Nothing that indicated he was completely helpless and vulnerable only a few hours ago.

"Lucius," she finally let out, "You are..."

"I am back," he finished for her, his voice back to his usual drawl. He looked so proud of himself. It was the Lucius Hermione was used to. It was the Lucius she hadn't seen for a few days.

And now he was back.

"You can see," she stated calmly.

"Obviously," he replied, slowly walking towards her, "Does it bother you?"

She shook her head, truthfully, "N-No."

His eyebrow rose, "Is that so?"

Nodding, she noticed the way he was looking at her.

Suddenly she felt like a pray with him hovering above her, looking down at her with his cold and manipulative eyes.

It surprised her that she actually missed those eyes. Lucius Malfoy was not the same person without his cold stare.

"W-What?" she demanded.

"I realized that you never thanked me for saving your life," he explained in an innocent voice.

"Saving my life?"

"I did not have to do what I did yesterday. I could have easily refused to do it," he spoke, observing her face, "It was very _noble_ of me to decide to help you."

Hermione could feel blood rushing to her cheeks, "It...it didn't seem like it bothered you that much at the time."

At that moment she understood what he was doing. He wanted to see the humiliation on her face, he wanted to see her eyes as he forced her to talk about it. It was the only reason he brought that subject up.

He let out a chuckle, "Oh no, it was quite entertaining, believe me."

"Then what do you want?"

She did not really want to know, but the words escaped her lips.

"I want a thank-you."

Immediately she tensed, "You can't be serious."

"I am always serious."

Hermione looked at him, not able to find words to express how she felt. She could not believe him.

Well, she should have expected something like this from him. He always was a bastard.

"I am waiting, Mudblood."

Hermione nodded, forcing herself to speak, "The only thing I can thank you for is...stopping when you did. Nothing else."

"I usually do not do that, but I assumed you would not like that part. At least not for your first time."

That caught her attention, "What? There won't be a second time."

His only response was a smirk. It annoyed her so much when he acted like he knew everything. He thought of himself so above her.

"There won't be!" Hermione insisted.

"Good night, Mudblood," he said, completely ignoring her.

"Where are you going?" she called after him before she could stop herself.

He sighed, then looked at her, "Do you truly wish to know?"

"Y-Yes," it sounded stronger in her mind.

"I am going to see Patricia."

Hermione's throat closed up, "Oh."

_Just pretend it does not bother you, Hermione. You can do it._

"I will try to fix the mess you caused," he replied before turning and leaving the room.

Hermione was furious.

He came into her room only to humiliate her. That was his only intention.

Demanding that she thank him for saving her? He truly had a twisted way of looking at things.

And what about him? He was the one who should thank her, she was the one taking care of him, not...Patricia. That name disgusted her so much.

And now he was off to see her.

Why did she had to ask him where he was going? Couldn't she have kept her mouth shut?

And what mess was he talking about? What did he have to fix?

Even though it was not right, Hermione had to admit she was calmer now that Lucius was back. There was no way of telling what would have happened if he remained blind. Actually, there was. Either the Death Eaters would get rid of him to take over, or the Resistance would eliminate him.

Either way, he would be gone.

And Hermione would be...alone.

Without him.

She could not stand the thought of it.

She would rather see Lucius in Azkaban than dead.

He had gotten under her skin and there was no way of escaping him.

And Hermione was not even sure if she did want to escape from him.

But those dark thoughts were only for her. No one else was allowed to hear them. They would not understand. They would judge her and that was the last thing she needed at the moment.

ooo

"Wake up."

Hermione groaned as something pulled her out of her deep sleep.

"Rise and shine."

What?

She opened her eyes to see Lucius standing above her. Blinking a few times, she realized he looked impatient.

"What are you doing here?" she asked, her voice raspy.

"Up," he ordered, pulling the sheet from her body, "I expect a visit in half an hour."

"W-What visit?" she asked, not moving, "And what does it have to do with me?"

She was exhausted and would do anything just for a few more hours of sleep.

Lucius waved his wand at the closed curtains and suddenly bright sunlight filled the room. Then he turned back to Hermione.

"Patricia," he said as if it was nothing important.

That immediately woke Hermione up, "What? Why?"

"Listen carefully," he spoke to her in a low voice, "We are going to play a little game."

Hermione narrowed her eyes at him and waited in silence.

He continued, "She needs to be convinced that there is absolutely nothing between the two of us. When I told her that you are still alive, she was upset, but I managed to calm her down. I have made up many stories about why I keep you alive but she needed to see it herself."

"So she's coming here?"

"Yes," he nodded, "I hope you will be able to play your part, Mudblood."

"Why can't you just get rid of her?" the words escaped her before she realized it.

Lucius looked at her with surprise, "Hermione Granger, the fighter for the Good side, is asking me to kill another human being?" he mocked.

Hermione remained silent, not even defending herself. What had she turned into? Did she really mean what she said?

"I cannot believe it, Mudblood. We will have a talk about that later," Lucius said, waving his wand again.

This time an ugly grey robe appeared on the bed, next to Hermione.

"Change into that," he ordered, "You have five minutes.

Hermione did not like it when he spoke to her with that voice and she sent him a cold glare, but then took the robe and walked into the bathroom.

ooo

Lucius was visibly tense when Hermione finally returned from the bathroom.

"That was _eight_ minutes," he almost growled at her, "That leaves us less time to prepare."

"Prepare?"

He took a deep breath, "Be prepared for _anything_. I do not know what will happen, but if you truly want to get rid of her, you will play your part well."

"And what exactly is my part?" she asked, "Poor, defenseless girl?"

He grinned at her, "I do not think that will be too hard to play."

She ignored his comment, "And what if something happens again?"

"What do you mean?"

"Something like at the party," she answered, looking down at her belly.

He tensed, "Try hard not to let something like that happen again. Especially in front of Patricia."

"She doesn't know," Hermione said quietly.

"And she will never find out."

Hermione took a deep breath, "What can I expect?"

"It all depends on how convincing we will be."

Alright.

Hermione was nervous. She kept telling herself that she could act. After all, she had been playing with Lucius for over a month. She could do the same thing with Patricia.

The hate between her and Lucius had to be real.

Well, that would not be so hard. All Hermione had to do was remember every single horrible thing he did to her or forced her to do.

Easy.

ooo

Any minute now.

Lucius and Hermione were in the study room, waiting for that woman. Both were nervous, though Lucius hid it pretty well.

Neither of them spoke, there was nothing to say.

All Hermione wanted to do was get it over with as soon as possible.

Finally they heard steps and then Lucius quickly walked over to the doors, opening them.

"Lucius, the elf said you are waiting for me here."

_Her_ voice.

Hermione hated that soft, sophisticated voice. It was not right that such a delicate voice belonged to such an awful woman.

"Nice to see you again, dear," Lucius said to her, taking her hand and placing a soft kiss on it.

Hermione felt as if someone stabbed her with a knife. He never treated her like that.

Patricia then turned to look at her. Her face was calm, but Hermione could see she was not very pleased.

"And here we have the girl," she spoke coldly.

"As promised," Lucius replied.

Patricia took a step closer to Hermione, eyeing her disapprovingly, "You are still alive, I see."

Hermione remained silent. She did not know if she was allowed to speak or not.

"How was it?" Patricia asked, "Did you have fun?"

Hermione tensed, but before she had a chance to say anything, Lucius moved to stand between the two of them.

"It was horrible," he spoke, "The Mudblood did not even want to do it. I practically had to force her on her knees."

Patricia then turned her attention to him, "And why did you do that, Lucius? Look at her! Why are you keeping her alive?"

Lucius' face darkened, "She is responsible for the death of my son. She was friends with Harry Potter. And unfortunately I cannot have that boy, but I have her. I can go to her every day and punish her for her friendship with The-boy-who-lived. That satisfies me much more than killing her. The pleasure lasts longer. Much longer."

Hermione shivered at his words. Did he mean it? It was like that at the very beginning, but things have changed since then. Or was she mistaken?

Patricia nodded, "I understand that, Lucius, but...I remember when you threw me out simply because I locked her outside. It seemed to me as if you were protective of her."

"Of course I am protective of her," he drawled, "I am protective of all my possessions."

"But - "

"Only_ I_ can hurt them, Patricia. You should have known better than to anger me."

The woman forced a smile, "I am sorry, Lucius."

Hermione felt like she was invisible. They were talking about her as if she was not even in the room. It was annoying.

Then as if she heard her thoughts, Patricia suddenly looked at her, but addressed Lucius, "Are you sleeping with her?"

Hermione almost choked with panic, but somehow managed to keep a calm face.

"Why do you want to know that?" Lucius asked carefully.

"Are we not in a relationship? I think I deserve to know."

Hermione waited for his answer, her heart beating like crazy.

Finally he spoke, "It happened only once."

Liar.

"But she's a Mudblood, Lucius. Did it not disgust you?"

"Believe me, I did not do it for my pleasure."

Then he grabbed Hermione's arm, pulling her closer, "Look at her. What could she possibly have that would interest me?"

"Then why?" Patricia asked.

"To punish her."

With that he let go of her arm.

Hermione did not want to listen anymore. She did not want to think about those dark times. She did not want to hear Lucius talk about her in such a way. It was harder than she thought it would be.

"Alright, show me," Patricia suddenly said, "Show me you feel nothing for her."

Lucius turned to face her, something dark in his eyes. He pulled a wand from his cane and flicked it at her.

Hermione's eyes widened as she realized her throat was closed. There was absolutely no air coming in. She opened her mouth in shock, trying desperately to fill her lungs with air, but there was _nothing_. Panicking, she grabbed her throat, trying to get rid of that invisible force, but nothing helped.

Her head was starting to hurt from the lack of oxygen and she fell to her knees, crying out.

She was dying.

No air.

Something warm tickled down her lips and she realized with horror that her nose was bleeding.

Looking up at Lucus, she only saw a cold expression on his face, nothing else. When was he going to stop? What if he stopped when it would be too late?

Just as he vision began to blur, her throat opened once again and she gasped for air, desperately needing to fill her lungs again.

Her whole body hurt.

Her brain hurt.

Coughing, she wiped her bloody nose and eventually she calmed down a bit.

"You could have left the Curse for a few seconds longer," came the voice from Patricia.

"Then I would have a dead Mudblood on my floor and I do not want that."

Patricia sighed, "Alright, let me try."

Hermione looked up in fear as the woman pointed her wand at her.

But before she had a chance to say anything, Lucius grabbed Patricia's hand, bringing it down.

"No."

"Why not?"

"She is mine. Only I am allowed to hurt her. Those are the rules, Patricia."

The woman let out a sigh, then nodded, "Fine."

"Are you satisfied?" he asked.

Patricia smiled, "Not by long shot."

Then she looked straight into Hermione's eyes, "We are not finished yet."

**A/N: Short chapter, I know. But Lucius is back! ;) Thank you for reading!**


	18. The Loss

~ chapter 18** The Loss ~**

"Please, don't hurt me," Hermione whispered.

"It's too late for that, Mudblood," Patricia replied, looking down at her, "You should have thought about that _before_ you returned into his life."

Hermione simply shook her head, forcing her body to tremble in fear.

No matter how humiliating it was, she had to play this part well. Patricia had to be convinced that her and Lucius' relationship was nothing more than master - slave relationship.

"Patricia, dear," Lucius interrupted, "I think we have done enough."

"Not yet," she complained.

Hermione kept her head down, hoping it would end soon.

Patricia continued, "Lucius, she _did_ destroy Draco's room. Do you not want to see her punished for that?"

Hermione looked up before she could stop herself. And she noticed the slight change in Lucius' expression, something so small it could easily be missed. The way his jaw hardened and his eyes became even colder, if possible.

Patricia noticed nothing, if she had, she would know better than to continue, "Your son's memory means nothing to her. Are you going to allow that?"

Lucius was silent for a long moment before looking into Hermione's eyes.

And it seemed as if he was...trying to tell her something. His look spoke so much, but Hermione could not understand a word. But it did not matter what he was trying to say. She had more important things to worry about.

She did not want to get tortured. She _could not_ get tortured. The Cruciatus Curse could have serious consequences. Even if Hermione and Lucius still had no idea about what to do with the baby, it would not be very smart to try and abort it in Patricia's presence. No one was allowed to know about that little secret, especially that woman. Lucius was smart, not using torture spells that could cause cramping, but what if Patricia asked him to?

It was too risky. They had to come up with something.

Then she realized it.

It could be the solution, but...could she do it?

And how to inform Lucius of her plan?

She looked at him, desperately hoping he would read her mind or do something to understand what she was thinking.

But he did not.

"Lucius, please, why are you hesitating?" Patricia demanded, suspicion slowly forming in her voice.

"I am not hesitating," he replied coolly, "I am merely trying to decide which spells to use. There are too many that would qualify."

"Perhaps I could help you with that?" she offered, pulling out her wand again.

Immediately Lucius snapped the wand from her, "How many times to I have to repeat it? You will not touch her. Try something like this again and we are finished here. Understood?"

Hermione knew it was risky to talk to her like that and Lucius was awake of that as well. But hopefully he knew what he was doing.

After a long moment of silence, Patricia nodded, "Alright, I am sorry. I wanted to help."

"I do not need your help with this," he drawled, "I think I am capable of torturing the Mudblood on my own."

"Of course," Patricia smiled, then turned her cold eyes on Hermione, "Do it, Lucius."

He cleared his throat, then pointed his wand at her, simply looking at her.

Hermione's heart was pounding and then she decided to to do something risky. She only hoped Lucius would play along.

The second she saw Lucius' lips part she screamed in agony, her body hitting the floor. She was shaking uncontrollably, twisting and forcing her own body into unnatural positions.

As she screamed at the top of her lungs, she allowed herself one quick look at Lucius. At first he seemed surprised and a bit confused, but he quickly pulled himself together.

Hermione only hoped she was convincing, she even forced a few tears down her cheeks.

A moment later, Lucius lowered his wand and Hermione took that as a sign to stop pretending. The curse was supposed to be lifted. She lay on the floor, barely moving, with soft cries escaping her lips. She barely resisted looking at Patricia to see if she believed her act or not, but knew it wouldn't be smart. So she fixed her gaze on Lucius' shoes.

"Was that enough for you or do you want me to kill her?" Lucius asked, sounding a bit annoyed.

"I doubt she would last another round," Patricia answered, "She is very weak, I expected more from her."

Hermione did not react at all.

But then she heard the unmistakable sound of kissing and she had to look up.

If only she hadn't.

She had seen them kiss before, but it always hurt.

Quickly averting her gaze, she closed her eyes and hoped it was the end of their little meeting.

"Do you want to have lunch together?" Patricia asked.

"Yes, of course," Lucius' voice was low, "See you in a couple of hours. At your house?"

Hermione felt so stupid, almost like a third wheel. She was there, on the floor, and Lucius and Patricia were talking about having lunch as if they were alone. It was a bizarre situation.

"I will walk you out," Lucius offered.

"What about her?"

"I would not worry about her."

Hermione could hear them walking out.

When she was sure she was alone, she opened her eyes slowly.

It was done.

_Thank god._

Looking around, she decided to stay where she was until Lucius returned.

Only a minute later he was back, closing the doors behind him.

Hermione looked at him to make sure he was alone, then slowly pulled herself up and cleared her throat, "Did it work?"

"You risked everything by pulling that stunt," he snapped at her, "What if something went wrong?"

"It didn't. You understood what I was trying to do and it all ended well," she defended herself.

He took a deep breath and calmed down a bit, "_Never_ do something like that again."

Hermione bit her tongue in annoyance and simply glared at him. He knew her plan had been brilliant, but he did not want to admit it.

But then she noticed the change in his expression. He seemed to relax.

And...there was something else as well. The way he was looking at her and his lips curled up in a slight smirk. She had seen it before.

"I have to say you did surprise me," he spoke slowly, "I expected you to ruin everything."

"Well, I didn't."

"_You didn't,"_ he agreed, then approached her, "You truly do have a talent."

"Talent for what?"

"Pretending."

Her throat closed up with panic. Why was he saying that?

He leaned even closer, so close she had trouble breathing normally and concentrating.

She tried to change the subject, "W-We did it. We played her."

"Yes, we did."

Hermione had to admit it felt good. That vile woman was convinced she had won and unfortunately she had no idea what was happening behind her back. She had no idea she was being played with.

After all those insults and humiliations, Hermione won. Lucius wanted _her_, not Patricia.

But...could that be called a win? Being chosen by a Death Eater was not exactly the best thing that could happen. Lucius Malfoy was hardly Prince Charming.

Still, Hermione felt good. She felt victorious.

Lucius continued, his voice barely above a whisper, "We can do whatever we wish now. Nobody will now."

She met Lucius' eyes and could not help but feel light-headed by the intensity in his look.

She knew what he wanted. It was clear.

His deep gaze, his rapid breathing and... his hand on her hip.

When did that happen?

And the strange thing was that she wanted it too. Her whole body ached for him. The adrenalin was pumping in her veins, she had to do something to calm herself.

Could she do it? Just like that?

Was it even right?

"Mudblood."

"Hermione," she corrected him, "_Hermione_."

If he called her by her name, she would lose it completely. She felt so drawn to him at that moment, she literally could not look away from his eyes. Had they always been so deep?

"No," he refused, his face hardening.

Was it really so difficult to call her by her name?

"Hermione," she breathed.

He simply stared at her, before finally speaking, "Granger."

Well, at least it was better than Mudblood.

She took a deep breath, then nodded, "Take me upstairs."

Her voice was barely above a whisper, but he heard her and when surprise disappeared from his face, his smirk turned into something devilish.

ooo

He led her into his bedroom.

Hermione was not entirely herself, it felt as if she was dreaming. Was she really going to go through with it?

For the first time nothing was forcing her to do it. It was something she herself had decided to do, _wanted_ to do.

She stood in the middle of his room, looking at the bed.

Lucius waved his wand, closing the curtains before turning to face her.

The room was dark now, just the way Hermione liked it. Somewhere deep inside her she realized that he had done that because of her. She always preferred to be with him in darkness. That way she could not see him clearly. It was easier to pretend. To ignore who he was and what they were doing.

She nervously looked at him, waiting for him to continue.

"Are you..." he paused for a moment, "Do you want this?"

This?

Surprisingly, she did want it.

It was wrong. On so many levels.

But she wanted it.

Everything in their world was wrong now.

Sick.

Why would she try to play a saint when she clearly was not one?

Slowly she nodded, "Y-Yes, I want it."

After a long moment of silence Lucius slowly walked to her, never taking his eyes off hers.

Why did he do that? Sometimes it seemed he could see into her very soul. Could he?

His face was a cold mask, even in the moments like this one. Hermione raised her shaking hand up, reaching up to his face, just wanting to touch him to see if he would let her. Her hand brushed onto his cheek and he tensed for a moment at the contact, but he did not pull away.

Hermione could feel her heart pounding in her chest like crazy.

Suddenly he grabbed her hand and pulled her closer to him.

"Lucius," she whispered, not even knowing why.

He said nothing, only sliding his hands down to her waist, the warm weight of them resting there for a moment.

When did he allow her to call him by his first name?

Hermione could still clearly remember the times when he punished her for that with a Crucio. She was not worthy of saying his name. When did that change?

When did she become _worthy_?

Hermione could feel the warmth from his body and it only caused her to lean closer to him.

"What do I mean to you?" she whispered, her voice shaking.

He was kissing her neck, making her whole body burn with need. Her eyes rolled back and she almost forgot what she had asked him.

"Lucius," she forced out, "Answer me."

"Must we talk about this now?"

"Yes," she demanded, "Now."

He did not speak, only forced her to take a few steps back until she hit a wall. He then kissed her, his lips moving expertly over hers before pinning her arms down by her sides. She could back no further into the wall.

"Lu - " she tried to speak, "Lucius."

"You talk too much," he whispered in her ear, kissing her lightly just behind her earlobe.

Hermione could not prevent a moan that escaped her lips. What was happening to her? She was finding his touch almost painfully pleasurable.

Lucius kissed her again, his hand slowly sliding down her waist and coming to rest between her legs. That caught Hermione by surprise and her eyes flew open.

Her knickers were soon off and then his hand returned between her legs.

Hermione grabbed it, "Wait..."

He took a deep breath and she could see he was impatient.

What did she even want to say?

She felt as though she was drowning as his eyes tore through her, as they had every time he looked at her.

After a long moment of silence she simply shook her head and brought her hands to his chest, pushing his robes down. Slowly she started unbuttoning his shirt and soon that too was on the floor.

His scars were barely visible now. Everything had healed perfectly.

He kissed her again and the next thing Hermione realized was that she they were on the bed. She did not even feel them moving.

Her robe was pulled over her head and thrown onto the floor. She felt completely exposed and was thankful when he removed his own trousers and then covered her body with his. Hermione bit her lip nervously, looking at his underpants. Did he want her to...to repeat the performance from a few days ago?

He simply smirked, noticing the question in her eyes.

Would she be able to? If he asked that of her?

Thankfully he shook his head, crawling on top of her and biting her neck lightly.

"What do I mean to you?" she repeated her question from before.

He ignored her question as he began kissing her again, moving his body against her sensually as he did so. Soon she responded, losing herself in his hungry possession of her mouth.

Hermione barely resisted not screaming out his name, her nerves were on fire.

Lucius groaned and slid his mouth lower, between her breasts, over her belly, working his way down.

That caught her attention and she opened her eyes, looking down at him. Where was he going?

"What are you..." she trailed off, her voice raspy.

He simply smirked, before lowering his head between her legs and wrapping his arms around her thighs.

Only a moment later Hermione squealed and thrust her hips upward.

What was he doing?

"Oh!"

She could not think straight. All she could do was feel.

And it felt as if her whole body was going to _explode_.

Hermione was crying out, twisting uncontrollably, but he held her in place.

Why was he doing this?

He had never before -

"Oh god!" she cried out as she felt something rising in her, and she arched her back, her toes curling under, her entire body pulling in on itself.

She could not believe what was happening. Never in her life had she felt such pure pleasure. So much pleasure it was almost too much.

"Lu..Luci..." she could not even speak properly, her own body betraying her.

Suddenly Hermione arched, then exploded, shaking and screaming, as a huge wave of heat and pleasure shot through her.

She could not see anything, she was not on this Earth anymore.

After a few moments she slowly returned, her eyes opening.

She could see him, staring in amazement at her.

Slowly he pulled himself up her body, his eyes never leaving hers.

Hermione found her voice again, "What..._why_?"

"For playing your part well," he replied, kissing her again.

She could taste herself on his lips and she did not care. Closing her eyes once again, she felt him settle between her thighs which were still shivering. Her hands clutched at his back, and she could feel his muscles flexing beneath her palms as he slid against her body hungrily.

Without words he plunged inside her, burying himself deep inside her with a hiss of pleasure. Hermione cried out and arched upward, feeling a strange mixture of pain and pleasure.

He held very still for a long minute and Hermione could not tell if that was because he was giving _her_ time to adjust to him or if he was giving _himself_ time to get control over his body. He was shaking, his eyes closed in concentration.

Hermione observed him with interest. It was very rare to see Lucius Malfoy lose control over himself.

Finally he opened his eyes, looking down at her as he started moving, thrusting shallowly.

Hermione was fighting to keep her eyes open, she wanted to see him, she wanted to see him looking at her, his face locked in a mixed expression of delight and concentration. He was making her feel so good, so full, so ... she could not even find the words for it.

Soon she could not fight anymore and her eyes snapped shut as she completely surrendered to the feelings.

And then she was being moved.

Her eyes opened in confusion as she suddenly found herself on top of him, straddling his body.

No.

She could not do this...not this position.

She froze.

"Move," he whispered, thrusting his hips up into her.

A flashback hit her.

_"There's no need to cry, dear girl," he said to her, "You had to lose it sooner or later. Now move, Mudblood," he ordered, placing his hands on her hips._

_"W-What?" she asked, taking a shaky breath._

_"Move. Up and down."_

_"Why?" she asked through her sobs._

_"Because every time you will look back onto this night, you will remember that it was you who was moving up and down on me."_

Hermione felt her throat close up with panic and she quickly shook her head, "N-N-No, I can't do t-this."

He looked at her, surprised.

Hermione got off of him, hugging herself with her arms, suddenly feeling too exposed and vulnerable.

"What is the matter?" he asked from behind her.

Did he not remember?

Hermione slowly turned to look at him, not saying anything. She had to remind herself that the Lucius in front of her had changed. He was still a Death Eater and a cruel man, but he was not the man that had forced himself onto her that night.

He leaned closer to her, slowly pressing his lips to hers again. He kept his pace even, slowly deepening the kiss, running his tongue along her lower lip. After a few moments Hermione forced the bad memories aside and melted into his arms again.

He guided her down so that she lay on her back, "Turn away from me," he whispered.

Hermione was a bit confused, but she did as he asked. Not only a moment later she felt his chest pressed up against her back. It felt strange, not being able to see him, but she _felt_ him more in this position.

His hand was on her stomach and it lingered there longer than she expected, it seemed as if he was caressing her belly. But before she could analyze it further, his hand moved up slowly, tracing circles between her breasts.

Hermione relaxed, letting out a deep breath.

This felt good.

Comforting.

Then he pulled her top leg up and toward him, resting it on his thigh. Hermione could not help but tense, everything was new and unfamiliar to her. It bothered her a bit that she could not see him. And then she felt him push into her and it felt so different than before. It seemed as if he was touching places he did not before.

He moved slowly at first, but then picked up his pace and Hermione could not complain. It felt too good.

She could feel his heartbeat, she could feel his breath on her neck, his hands on her body.

"What...what am I to you?" the question escaped her lips.

He groaned in pleasure, but did not answer.

"What..." Hermione tried again, barely able to speak, "What...am..."

"Everything," she heard him growl into her ear.

But before she had a chance to react to that, he quickened his pace, making her cry out as words died in her throat.

She could not think.

She could not speak.

Something was forming in the pit of her stomach and it kept getting bigger and bigger, completely taking over her.

Hearing him moan into her neck sent her over the edge as she cried out his name, her body feeling as it exploded into a million pieces.

And then everything went black.

ooo

Hermione opened her eyes slowly, blinking a few times.

Where was she?

This was not her bedroom.

Oh.

Then she remembered.

Her face blushed and she slowly turned around only to find Lucius in the bed next to her, watching her.

She cleared her throat, "W-What happened?"

He simply raised an eyebrow at her.

"I-I don't mean it like that," she quickly corrected herself, "I remember, but..."

"It was too much for you," he answered, his voice husky and sleepy, then he smirked, "Obviously _I_ was too much for you."

Hermione took a deep breath, not knowing what to say.

The pleasure really was...too much. She did not know it was possible to faint because of it.

Silence fell upon the room.

It was always uncomfortable _after_.

They did not know what to talk about.

"What happened, Mudblood?"

Mudblood again.

But she did not correct him. She did not have the energy. Not now.

"What do you mean?" she asked, pulling the covers tightly around her.

"_During_," he replied, "What happened to you?"

"Oh."

He meant her little outburst.

She did not know what to say. She did not even want to think about it. Why was he bringing it up now?

He continued, his tone mockery, "You could have told me before you did not like that position."

"Stop it."

"Stop what?"

Hermione looked at him, "Don't make fun of it."

His face turned serious and he took a deep breath, "Then explain it to me."

"You really don't remember?"

"Remember _what_?"

Hermione let out a small, humorless laugh. Unbelievable. That incident, that night, his actions, his words would remain in her mind until the day she died and he did not even remember it.

Slowly she started, "The first time...when we...when you - "

He tensed up and it even seemed as if he was not breathing.

Hermione continued, "Don't you remember what you said?"

He spoke after a long moment, "I said a lot of things that night."

Hermione could feel her throat close up as she replayed the memory in her mind. He did not remember and to her everything was so clear. It was as if it happened yesterday.

She swallowed hard before continuing, "You...put me in the same position and...you said some things."

"What things?"

Hermione could hear her own voice shivering as she spoke, "You said 'there's no need to cry' and that I 'had to lose it sooner or later'."

She looked up at him and noticed he was staring at her, his expression unreadable. But at least he was not laughing at her or mocking her.

She continued, "Then you ordered me to move and you said it was because every time I will look back onto that night I will remember it was I who was moving..." she trailed off, not able to finish the sentence.

He was completely silent.

Hermione did not dare to look up at him.

Had she forgiven him for that? It still hurt to even remember that event, but now everything was different. Wasn't it?

Still...how could she forgive him when he never even asked for forgiveness? Did he even regret it? Did he even _remember_ it?

A few minutes passed and when he said nothing, she made a move to get up, but he stopped her, grabbing her arm, "Where are you going?"

"Bathroom...I need to...take a bath."

"You always do that."

This time she looked at him, "Do what?"

"Rush into the bathroom after we are finished."

She tensed, feeling a bit uncomfortable, "Well, I want to clean up."

"Am I dirty?"

"I - " she did not know what to say.

Why did she always feel the need to get away from him after they were done? Was it her subconsciousness telling her how sick and dirty she was?

"Stay here," he said and his voice left no room for arguments.

His arm snaked around her middle, pulling her down.

This surprised her, what did he want with her?

"Do you regret it?" he suddenly asked, "Is that the reason you always want to leave after?"

Hermione was silent for a moment, before answering, "I always regret it."

It was the truth.

She was not stupid. No matter how good it felt, how right it felt, she knew it was wrong. But she simply chose not to care. What kind of a person did that make her?

"Then why do you do it?" he asked.

"I...I don't know," that too was the truth.

A few more minutes passed in silence.

Then Hermione remembered something, "What about your...lunch date? Aren't you going to be late?"

"I am not going."

"What?" she looked up at him in surprise.

"I am not going," he repeated.

"But...she'll be angry."

"It matters not. I will find an excuse later."

Hermione relaxed.

Then a strange feeling started forming inside of her.

He was rather with her than with that Patricia. She knew she was not supposed to care about that, but she did. And it felt good.

Hermione let out a long breath and allowed herself to relax completely.

They did not talk.

But he was there, next to her.

She closed her eyes and soon sleep took over her.

ooo

Hermione was awoken by a noise.

Her hand searched Lucius' side of the bed, but he was not there. She slowly opened her eyes and noticed him walking up and down the room while buttoning up his shirt. He was dressed completely which meant he was leaving.

She cleared her throat awkwardly and sat up, causing him to look at him. He removed his gaze after a second, putting on his cloak.

"Where are you going?" Hermione asked.

"I have some things I need to take care of."

She nodded, "How long was I asleep?"

"A couple of hours."

Her eyes widened at that. It had to be late afternoon already. Was he...was he in the room with her all this time?

Lucius stopped and turned to look at her, "You can stay here or return to your room. Do _not_ wonder around the house."

She could sense the warning in his voice and simply nodded. Why was he so against her walking around in the house? Was he hiding something from her? Probably not, if so, he would have her locked in her room. And now he was only warning her.

He turned and disappeared into the bathroom, leaving Hermione alone in the room.

She looked around, realizing how familiar she was with his bedroom. It almost felt like home. And how could it not? She spent months in this room, without being able to see. She remembered the times when she kept bumping into things and tripping over chairs.

Thank God those times were over.

She got up from the bed, her eyes searching the floor for her clothes. Finally she found her robe and quickly slipped it on. The best thing would be to return to her room. If she remained in Lucius' bedroom, things would only get more complicated.

But before she could move she heard something.

Voices.

Her head turned to the bathroom to see if Lucius was saying something, but it was not coming from that direction.

The voices grew stronger and Hermione tensed, realizing whatever it was, it was quickly approaching the room.

"...get out of my way..."

Before Hermione had a chance to react, the doors were pushed open with force.

Oh God.

There was Patricia, her face shaking with rage. Beside stood the small house elf, "M-Miss, I said she had to w-wait downstairs, b-but she would not listen."

Hermione froze, almost feeling the rage that was coming from Patricia.

"The House elf is calling you _Miss_?" she asked with disbelief.

Hermione said nothing to that, she was completely speechless.

"Where is he?" the woman asked calmly, even though anger could be heard in her tone.

A few long moments passed before Hermione found the words, "H-He's in the...um...bathro - " she trailed off as she noticed Patricia examining the room slowly.

It was obvious she realized what had happened in the room when she noticed Hermione's knickers on the floor and the bed that was completely messed up.

Their eyes met and Patricia's glare turned cold, "I am not stupid. And he will not make a fool out of me."

Hermione backed away slowly, "I-It's not what you think..."

"Oh is that so? Tell me that I am mistaken. Tell me you two were not just _rolling_ like pigs on this bed," she raised her voice.

Hermione stopped and suddenly realized she did not have to defend herself. Why would she? It was no point in lying, everything was clear now.

So she nodded, "Alright. You were right, _congratulations_."

That seemed to send Patricia into rage, "You..._mudblood_! How dare you disrespect me?"

"Respect is earned!" Hermione shot back, "And why _would_ I respect you? You are a horrible, vile woman with no respect to those who are not sharing your _pure_ blood."

"What is happening here?" Lucius demanded, exiting the bathroom.

He froze in shock when he noticed Patricia in the room. All color seemed to leave his face.

"Where were you, Lucius?" the woman asked, "We were supposed to meet for lunch."

"I was...preoccupied," his voice was even, but his face was betraying him.

He was not as calm as he wanted to appear.

Patricia laughed and pointed at the bed, "Oh I see that!"

Lucius walked over to her, "Let's go into the study room."

"No!" she screamed, "I want to stay here!"

"Listen to me - " he started.

"_You_ listen to _me_, Lucius Malfoy. I am not a toy you can just use and throw away when you are bored."

Hermione could not believe what was happening. She never thought she would find herself in this situation. And she did not want anything to do with it. Patricia was something _Lucius_ had to take care of, he was the one to get involved with her.

"I-I'm going to my room," Hermione said and tried to walk past them, but Patricia grabbed her arm.

"You are not going anywhere!" she screamed, pushing Hermione into a wall.

"That is enough!" Lucius raised his voice, "This is between the two of us."

"No, this is between the three of us! You put her in the middle, Lucius, now deal with it!"

Hermione only wanted to leave the room. It was too much.

The screaming.

The bad energy.

The _drama_.

It was almost impossible to breath.

Suddenly Patricia pulled out her wand, but Lucius grabbed it and threw it across the room.

"What the hell do you think you are doing?" he demanded.

It was getting dangerous.

Hermione once again made an attempt to leave the room, but Patricia grabbed her and shoved her back into the wall, causing her to hid her head painfully.

And that was it.

Hermione met her eyes, "Don't ever do that again, you..._lunatic_!"

"You think I'm crazy?" Patricia laughed, "You haven't seen anything yet."

"You two solve this! I'm done," Hermione said, trying to walk past Patricia again, but the woman jumped at her, shaking her, pulling at her hair.

Hermione screamed, trying to get away from her, but the woman was surprisingly strong.

"Enough!" Lucius hissed, trying to break the two of them apart.

Hermione struggled with all her strength and somehow Lucius got in the middle, trying to restrain Patricia, but she did not give up and somehow she managed to slam her elbow into Hermione's stomach.

"This is the last time I say this," Lucius warned the struggling woman in his arms, "Calm yourself."

Hermione cried out with pain, she could barely breath, that blow almost made a hole in her stomach. She leaned against Lucius' back for a moment, but then Patricia grabbed her hair again, pulling like crazy.

And then it happened.

Lucius, trying to restrain Patricia, suddenly hit Hermione with his arm, pushing her into the large mirror behind them. She hit it with such force that it broke into thousand pieces. Dropping to the floor immediately, she could feel her hands burning as small shreds of glass cut into her skin.

In all her panic she managed to realize there was something stabbing her in her lower back.

She could not breath.

It hurt so much.

Hermione was afraid to look around to see what it was.

Both Lucius and Patricia stopped with their fight, looking at her. Then Lucius pulled his wand out, quickly flicking it over Patricia and the woman dropped to the floor, unconscious.

"Mudblood," Lucius approached her quickly, "Are you alright?"

Hermione shook her head, not able to speak. Slowly she lowered herself to the floor completely, her face pressed against the carpet. She was still awake and she could hear Lucius let out a startled gasp and that frightened her.

Why?

What did he see?

She could feel something in her back, she was stabbed, but it was not that bad, right?

She was still conscious, so it could not be that serious.

And then she could feel something warm on her back. Some kind of a liquid. Slowly she turned her head just enough to see her robe covered in blood.

Oh God.

Lucius addressed the house elf, "Find Severus! Tell him it's an emergency! _Go_! "

Emergency?

Hermione started panicking, her breath coming in short gasps. She could clearly hear sheer panic in his voice and that frightened her the most.

"Lu..." she started, "_Lucius_."

"Do not move."

"W-What is it?"

She could feel more and more blood on robe and she was slowly starting to lose herself.

"Oh God, the..._the baby_..." she breathed out.

"Severus is going to be here soon."

She fought hard to keep her eyes open, but her eyelids seemed to get heavier with each passing second.

"I have to take it out," Lucius suddenly said, a bit breathless.

Hermione tensed immediately, "Take w-what out?"

"Mudblood, listen to me," he ordered, "It is going to hurt. But do not move."

How can he say that to her?

"N-No," she cried out.

"You are losing too much blood."

Before she had a chance to say anything else, excruciating pain shot through her as Lucius pulled the shard out of her. Hermione let out a horrible scream, her eyes filling with tears. She bit hard on her lip until she could feel blood in her mouth.

Then something was being pressed into her back, onto the wound and it hurt, it burned and Hermione begged for unconsciousness.

Tears rolled down her face and she did not even try to keep her cries inside her.

"Hold on," she heard Lucius mutter to her and he took one of her hands in his own.

Hermione's vision started to darken and blur.

"Lucius," she whispered, "_I-I can't see anything_."

His grip on her hand tightened and that was all she could hold onto. She was losing herself in the darkness, she could not see anything, she could not see him, she could not hear him anymore.

Everything became very quiet.

Such silence.

She opened her mouth, but no voice came out.

She was in a dark place.

But strangely she could still feel his hand and she held onto it as if that was the little string that was connecting her to life.

And then she lost herself completely.

ooo

"Miss Granger?"

Someone's voice pulled her out of the darkness.

"Miss Granger, can you open your eyes?"

She groaned and tried to move, but it was so hard. All she could do was lay there.

"Open your eyes."

"Mhmm," she mumbled, opening one eye.

She could see Professor Snape sitting on the chair next to her bed. Everything was dark.

Forcing herself to open her eyes completely, she needed a few moments to remember everything. She looked around and noticed she was in Lucius' bedroom. The broken mirror was still there, the shards on the floor.

She was lying on her side and it was getting uncomfortable so she tried to move, but Snape stopped her.

"You should avoid lying on your back. It still needs to heal," he said and Hermione froze, not moving.

She nodded, then let out a deep breath.

"How are you feeling?" he asked.

Hermione cleared her throat, "Horrible. Tired."

"Any pain?"

"N-No...why? Should I feel it?"

"You have been given many pain-relieving potions as well as blood-replenishing potions."

Hermione listened to him patiently and she noticed he was acting strange. There was just _something_.

"What is it?" she asked weakly.

He did not answer. But he also did not deny that something was wrong.

"_What_?" she asked again, panic rising inside of her.

She moved her legs, then her arms. Everything seemed to be working properly. But why was that serious expression on his face?

"Miss Granger."

"Where is Lucius?"

"That is not important at the moment."

She looked at him, suspiciously, "Then what is?"

Snape was struggling with words, "You have lost a lot of blood. The shard injured a muscle in your back. It is going to take longer to heal completely."

"Alright," she nodded, sensing that the worst was about to come.

"I have barely stopped the bleeding - "

Hermione interrupted him, "But you did and...I'm fine, right?"

"You will be."

"Then what's..." she trailed off, not able to look away from his eyes.

And then she realized it.

"And what about..." she paused for a moment, suddenly everything became clear to her, "I'm not...pregnant anymore, is that it?"

He slowly nodded, "I couldn't do anything about that. It was too late."

Hermione felt her whole body go numb.

It was gone? Just like that?

"Miss Granger?"

She could not speak for a long moment.

She did not _feel_ any different. But she was different. _Everything_ was different now.

"Where is he?" she asked, her voice barely above a whisper.

Snape only looked at her, not saying anything.

"I want to see him, please."

"He...he does not want to see you."

"He..._what_?"

Hermione could not believe what she was hearing.

Snape tried again, "Give him some time."

"No..."

"He is - "

Hermione raised her voice, "I want to see him! Tell him to come here!"

She gasped at the pain in her back.

"You should not get upset," Professor Snape advised, "_Calm down_."

"Bring him here," Hermione whispered.

"I will tell him."

Nodding, she closed her eyes and tried to ignore the pain in her back and the pain in her heart.

She could not decide which one was the worst.

ooo

Everything changed.

Hermione could not believe it. The life truly was cruel. Just as she was starting to accept she was pregnant, it was all taken away from her. Just as Lucius was starting to change, it all came crashing down.

What now?

Where could she go now?

What could she do?

And where was _he_?

She was alone in his bedroom. On his bed.

And it was night already.

Snape had promised to tell him she wanted to see him.

But where was he?

Hermione took a deep breath, deciding she had to do something. How could he leave her just like that? And when she _needed_ him.

He left her.

Alone.

Without explanation.

She shouldn't be alone.

Slowly, she pushed the covers off her body, then pulled herself up. Pain shot through her back, but that did not stop her. It took a couple of minutes, but then she was standing, barely, but she was standing.

She was decided to find him.

He will not ignore her just like that.

As she made the first step, she doubled over as the cramping in her lower belly started.

But her anger was forcing her to continue. Who did he think he was to just leave her like that?

She reached the doors, panting and holding her stomach, hoping to ease the pain.

The doors were not locked and she easily opened them.

"Lucius," she called out.

There was no one.

"Lucius!"

Nothing.

She could not raise her voice more, it hurt too much. So she stepped onto the hallway, slamming the doors a few times, hoping that would get someone's attention.

"Lucius!"

Then she heard it.

Steps.

She waited nervously and then she saw him.

He quickly made his way to her, grabbing her arm and leading her back into the bedroom.

"What are you doing up?" he demanded as he helped her to the bed.

Hermione sat on it, looking up at him.

His shirt was bloodied and for some strange reason she could not tear her eyes away. Why didn't he change? Many hours passed since the accident.

"Lucius..."

"You should be resting."

Why was his voice so cold? So emotionless?

It seemed as if he did not want to deal with her.

"What happened?" Hermione asked.

"I believe Severus explained everything to you."

"No...no, he didn't," she shook her head, "Where is Patricia? Where were _you_?"

"Do not worry about her. She is gone."

"G-Gone? What do you mean?"

He ignored her question, "You should be resting."

Hermione could feel the change in his attitude. He was looking anywhere but at her.

"I'm... sorry," she whispered, desperately wanting him to look at her.

"What for?" he was so cold.

"For...losing it."

He tensed up, "There is nothing to be sorry for."

"You don't mean that."

Lucius took a deep breath, meeting her eyes, "Neither of us wanted it. We were planning on getting rid of it."

"_Were_ we?" she asked.

"Lay down," he said to her.

"No," Hermione protested, forcing herself to stand up, "Tell me why are you acting like this. Where is Patricia?"

Lucius did not answer, but then his eyes made their way down to her thighs. Hermione looked down as well, noticing a trail of blood on her leg.

She immediately started feeling sick.

Lucius did not react for a long moment as if in trans, but then he conjured a towel on the bed, "Lay down."

Hermione obeyed, keeping her mouth shut.

"I'll get Severus," he said, walking out of the room.

"Will you be back?" she asked.

He paused for a long moment, before repeating the sentence, "I'll...get Severus."

With those words he left.

Hermione felt so alone.

Why wasn't he there with her?

**A/N: Don't hate me! I know many of you wanted Hermione to keep the baby, but this is a dark story and a baby simply would not fit it. I hope you were not too turned off by it. There will be a lot of talk about the baby and it won't be forgotten just like that, don't worry, but I just felt this was the right thing to do. Keep reading. :)**


	19. Moving On

**chapter 19**

**~ Moving on ~**

Hermione was completely still, staring at the wall.

There was a dead silence in the room. She was alone. _Really_ alone. No longer was there someone growing inside of her. It went away. Just like that.

It was the day after. And she had been alone ever since last night. Ever since Snape left.

Lucius did not come back. Obviously he did not want to see her.

How dare he?

It was his problem too, but he just chose to ignore it.

Hermione knew she should feel many emotions, but she only felt anger.

_Rage_.

At him.

He was so much older, he should be more mature, but he was acting like a child. He always did that. He avoided responsibility. He did it with Draco's death, blaming everyone else, blaming _Hermione_, but never himself.

Three days passed.

And Hermione finally got up from the bed. The broken mirror was still there, the shards on the floor, reminding her of what had happened.

Trying to ignore it, she walked in the bathroom slowly, then froze as she saw her reflection in the mirror there. She looked like death.

What happened to her?

She was such a normal, sweet, _alive_ girl and now she was skinny, pale and _dead_. She looked dead. There were dark circles around her eyes, her face was so pale she could see the veins underneath the skin. Her hair was lifeless. There was blood on her nightgown, she hadn't bothered to change it.

It didn't matter anyway.

And then something inside her snapped.

She was going to find Lucius. And she was going to give him a piece of her mind.

Quickly pulling all the clothes off, she jumped into the bathtub, spending only five minutes there. The hot water felt good against her skin, but Hermione had no time for that.

She found another robe in the closet, quickly putting it on, then making her way towards the doors. It did not surprise her that it was locked.

Hermione knew screaming or calling out for him would do her no good. He was ignoring her, pretending she was not here, in the _room next to his_. She would have to force him to acknowledge her.

Calmly, she looked around the room, searching for something that she could use.

Nothing.

And then her eyes met the doors again.

She never tried...

Hesitantly she grabbed the doorknob with both her hands and then she pushed forward. Taking a deep breath, she used all her body to try and force the door open.

It didn't work.

And Hermione was starting to get tired.

She stopped for a second, bringing back all the fury she felt before, all the rage, all the pain.

She could feel it, bubbling inside of her, growing and growing until her whole body was shaking and she felt she could breathe fire. She needed to punch something, she needed to get that anger out of her.

And then she kicked the doors.

And she kicked them again.

And again.

And the fact that they would not open, only added to her anger.

She almost screamed as she collided with the doors, her whole body pushing into them and then it happened. The doors gave in.

Hermione almost lost her balance and fell, but she caught herself.

What just happened?

She could not believe it worked. She never thought she was _that_ strong. It was amazing what anger could do to you. How strong it could make you.

Alright, she thought, next step - Lucius' bedroom.

Withing seconds she was by his door and she knew she would find him in there because it was still early in the morning.

It was not locked.

She casually walked in and then she noticed him.

Asleep.

In his large four-poster bed..

For a few long moments she simply stood there, watching him. The way his chest was rising and falling with each breath he took, the peaceful expression on his face. No smirk.

But then she snapped out of it.

"Wake up," her cold voice cut through the silence.

Immediately his eyes snapped open and his hand reached for the wand on his nightstand. He pointed it at Hermione, but then his eyes met with hers.

"Mudblood?" he asked, his voice raspy.

Hermione said nothing.

He slowly lowered his wand, "What the hell are you doing here? How did you get in here?"

"How long were you intending to leave me there in that room?" she asked.

Lucius cleared his throat, getting up from the bed and walking over to her, "How did you get here?" he repeated the question, "Did the elf let you out?"

"_I_ let myself out," she replied.

Lucius looked at her, confused, but then he made his way past her, walking out of the room. Hermione did not move, waiting for his return. He did return, only a few moments later, a look of disbelief on his face.

"You..._broke_ out of your room?" he asked, shock evident in his voice, "_How_?"

"The Muggle way," she forced a smile, "There was no magic involved."

Lucius was silent for a few long moments, obviously having trouble believing that.

Finally he crossed his arms over his chest, "It will cost me to replace those doors."

"Why don't you just fix it?"

He raised one eyebrow, "Apparently I will have to find much stronger doors."

Silence.

"Why did you just leave me there?" she quietly asked.

"Did you expect me to sit by your bed, holding your hand and reading good night stories to you?"

That actually hurt.

"You are such a bastard."

Surprisingly enough, he let that insult slide," You needed to recover."

"Don't lie. Why did you leave me all alone?"

He walked away from her, "You broke out of your room and came to bother me this early in the morning to ask me that question?"

"Yes."

Silence again.

"You just left," Hermione continued, "I was in pain, I could have died, I needed someone - "

"I sent Severus to you."

"_He_ was not the father of that baby."

That seemed to get to him. He froze, his face going pale.

When he finally spoke, it was calm and controlled, "I had others matters I needed to attend to."

"You had..." Hermione could not believe him, "What could be more important?"

His only answer was an angry sigh.

"I know you...hate me," she spoke, "I don't have illusions about you and I, but how could you just leave?"

"You will understand soon."

"What are you talking about?"

"Not now. Return to your room."

"No."

"Mudblood."

"No!" she screamed at him, "You tell me _now_!"

He finally looked at her, his cold grey eyes digging a hole in her.

"Fine," he forced out, "You want to know?"

"Yes!"

He walked over to her, grabbing her arm and dragging her out of the room.

ooo

"Where are you taking me?" she demanded, even though she knew exactly where they were going. And that frightened her.

They were going down to the dungeons.

Why?

"Lucius!" Hermione struggled but he was not letting go of her arm.

Finally they were in front of a large wooden door.

"Are you...going to lock me in there?" Hermione whispered, not actually wanting to hear the answer.

Lucius did not answer, instead he pushed the doors open and then dragged Hermione in.

"Let go of me already!" she screamed, then froze when she noticed there was a person in the dungeon.

It can't be, Hermione thought.

Patricia.

The woman was covered in dirt and was sitting on the ground, shivering uncontrollably.

"What...what have you done to her?" Hermione whispered.

"Nothing," came a reply from him.

"But she's..."

"Being locked in the dungeon for a few days does that to a person," he said.

Patricia looked up at both of them, "Y-You can't keep me here forever. People are going to notice I'm missing."

"Who is going to notice?" Lucius asked, "You are a widow. And as far as I know, you have no friends."

Hermione observed the woman in silence, noticing there was blood on her robes and on her face.

Lucius was lying. He _had_ hurt her, it was obvious.

"And...you are just going to keep her here...for how long?" Hermione asked, turning to face him.

"I haven't thought about it," he answered, not at all worried.

"Lucius, you are not thinking clearly," she started, "What if someone finds out?"

"It does not matter. I am their leader. If anyone dares to act against me - "

Hermione cut him off, "Listen to yourself!"

He shook his head, walking over to Patricia and grabbing her hair, "Isn't this what you wanted, Mudblood? Do not act like a saint now."

Hermione remained silent, trying not to look at the woman on the ground.

"Why are you doing this, Lucius?" Patricia spoke through her teeth, "The Mudblood's fine, no harm has been done to her! Why are you doing this to me?"

A cold laugh escaped him, _"No harm has been done?"_

"Lucius..." Hermione tried, but he ignored her, pulling harder on Patricia's hair.

The woman cried out, but then bit her lower lip to keep silent.

"_This_ is what I had to attend to," he explained, "Now that you know, we can leave."

He released Patricia's hair and walked back to Hermione, "Shall we?"

"You are going to die, Lucius," Patricia whispered, "I hope you realize that."

Ignoring her, he walked out of the dungeon and Hermione followed, not allowing herself to admit there was truth in Patricia's words.

ooo

"You are awfully quiet, Mudblood."

They were back in Hermione's bedroom. All the way up from the dungeons, Hermione had not said a single word. What could she say?

"Are you feeling sorry for her? She hurt you," Lucius said coldly.

That got Hermione's attention, "You're doing this for _me_? What does that say about...us?"

He ignored her, "She made one too many mistakes. I do not forgive easily."

"You do not forgive at all," Hermione muttered, "But...it's wrong."

"Wrong? I thought you would be glad after what she did."

Hermione stepped closer to him, "What did she do?"

She wanted to see if he would say it out loud, she wanted him to say it out loud.

"I have a meeting," he finally spoke, completely ignoring her question, "I need to prepare for it."

Before she could say anything he walked past her, waved his wand over the doors, repairing them, "This will do. For now."

And then he was gone.

ooo

Hermione rubbed the bracelet Snape had given her.

She was sick and tired of waiting and doing nothing. She desperately needed a new mission, something to occupy her mind with.

And for that she needed Snape.

ooo

An hour later he arrived.

There was worry in his eyes when he first entered the room, but he calmed down when he saw nothing was wrong.

"Granger, how many times do I have to tell you? You rub the bracelet multiple times _only_ in case of emergencies."

"Well, it is an emergency."

He raised an eyebrow, "Oh, is it?"

"Yes. I need a new mission."

Snape sighed, "You should take a few days to rest."

"I'm fine," she snapped at him.

"It's only been four days. You need to recover," he explained, "I came here under a pretense of having to examine you."

"I'm fine, really. Let's just get to business," Hermione insisted.

Snape gave her a hard look, but after a few long moments he nodded, "Alright."

"Good."

"Madwill. You remember him."

Hermione nodded, "From the party. The Resistance wants him dead."

"Exactly. And Lucius is meeting with him. Today."

"That's the meeting he told me about," Hermione said to herself.

"Last time we spoke about this you were not so sure you could pull it off," Snape spoke quietly.

"I _can_ pull it off. You want Lucius to get rid of him? I can do that. I can make him do that."

She could see Snape was surprised by her words.

"Why that sudden change of attitude?" he asked.

"He...does crazy things for me," she admitted, then moved closer to him as if she was afraid someone might hear them, "He has Patricia locked in the dungeon."

"I know."

"Y-You do?"

"He told me. Asked for my opinion."

"And you told him it was a crazy idea? It could get him killed! If someone finds out - "

"I could not convince him to let her go," Snape replied calmly, "Besides, that woman knows too much."

Hermione shook her head, "This is _all_ too much. Is he going to keep her there until she dies?"

"I do not know," Snape answered, "But that is not our main concern at the moment."

She nodded, trying to clear her mind, "Tell me about Madwill. What is he like?"

"A Pureblood supremacist. He hides behind an elegant and calm exterior, but he is a vile man."

"When is the meeting?"

"In an hour."

Hermione took a deep breath, "Will you be attending?"

"No. Why? What are you planning?"

It was very clear to her.

"I need to be alone with Madwill for a few minutes. You have to interrupt the meeting and get Lucius out of the study room long enough for me to sneak in."

"I can do that," he nodded, "But are you sure you know what you are doing? We can wait for a few more days. The Resistance understands - "

"_I'm fine_," she repeated for the third time that day, "Just...do me a favor. Don't lock the doors when you leave."

"Alright. I will interrupt the meeting and speak loudly so that you will be able to hear me. You will know when it is safe to go to the study room."

Hermione shivered slightly. She was becoming nervous. What if something goes wrong? What if Lucius sees right through her?

Snape walked to the doors, then stopped and looked back at her, "You two have a connection. I cannot explain it, but it is there. Remember when Lucius was injured and you took his wand to fight off Philix?"

Hermione listened patiently, "Yes."

"How come his wand did not reject you? It is _Lucius_' wand, it belongs to him, it _is_ him in some way. But when you touched it, when you used it against Philix, how come it obeyed you?"

"I-I...don't know," she answered truthfully.

She never thought about it.

Lucius' wand did not reject her. And it should have. Lucius hated her back then, she was nothing more than a filthy Mudblood to him. And yet, his wand accepted her.

Snape said nothing more as he left the room.

ooo

And hour or so later Hermione opened the door and listened carefully.

There was only silence for a few long minutes.

And then she heard footsteps coming from downstairs.

Then voices.

Gathering her courage, Hermione stepped out of her room.

Then she heard it clearly.

Snape's voice.

Then Lucius's.

They were walking away and soon she could not hear them anymore.

That was her chance.

Quickly she ran down the stairs until she reached the study room. Not allowing herself to stop or hesitate, she slipped inside the room, closing the doors behind her.

There was only one man there. At first he looked surprised, then annoyed to see her.

"What are you doing here? Does Lucius let you wonder his house?" he demanded.

It was Madwill. Hermione still remembered him from the party when he insulted her and her family.

"I-Is Lucius here?" she asked, her voice shaking a bit.

"Are you blind?"

"Where is he?"

"How dare you speak to me as if we were equals? How dare you look me in the eye, Mudblood?"

Hermione stepped closer to him, "You're right. We aren't equals. I am _much_ more than you, you racist pig."

Fury showed on his face, "I am going to talk to Lucius about your behaviour."

"Do you think he'll care? He is head over heels for me," she forced a smile.

"What are you - ?"

This was it.

She needed to do this now.

"You are evil. You deserve it," she whispered, more to herself than to him.

"Deserve what?" he raised his voice.

Hermione looked around the room, grabbed the first candlestick and hit him over the head with it. And that was all it took. He grunted, then fell to the floor, falling unconscious.

Oh God.

Oh God.

Then she started panicking, dropping the candlestick from her hands and hurrying over to the man, checking if he was still alive.

He was.

Good.

Think, Hermione.

_Think_.

She bit down hard on her lower lip until it started bleeding. She then ran over to Lucius' desk, opening drawers, looking for something to help her...

Letter opener.

She found it and cut her robe a bit, making it seem as if there was a struggle. Putting the letter opener back to the drawer, she pushed all the papers from the desk to the floor.

What else?

Oh!

She scratched her own arms, leaving violent fingernail marks on her soft skin.

That was it.

She took a deep breath, she let out a scream.

And then she screamed again.

And again.

Finally the doors opened.

"What - " Lucius looked furious, but then his face turned shocked.

Hermione forced herself to cry, "L-Lucius...I don't k-know..."

Snape followed Lucius into the room and he too seemed shocked.

Hermione was becoming nervous, no matter how hard she tried, there were no tears in her eyes. She could not bring herself to tears.

"What happened?" Lucius asked, looking around the room.

Snape quickly made his way to the man on the floor. After a moment he spoke, "He's alive."

Hermione hugged herself with her arms, shivering, "I-I came looking for you."

"You...what?" he asked, still completely shocked.

And then Hermione threw herself at him, wrapping her arms around him and pushing her face in his chest. That way she could hide there were no tears on her face.

"What happened?" Lucius asked, pulling her away from him to look at her.

"W-We got into a fight and he j-just lost it," Hermione lied, "He s-said he was going to kill me."

She could see Lucius' face softened a bit, "That makes no sense," he whispered.

Hermione could see he had trouble believing her, so she winced in pain and let out a cry. Lucius' hand touched her cheek gently, observing her split lip, "You're bleeding."

"He knows about us," she suddenly blurted out.

Lucius' face lit up with panic, "That is not possible."

"He s-said..."

"Severus, we need to...take him down into one of the dungeons," Lucius ordered.

"Are you sure that is wise?"

"Do it, Severus."

Hermione looked at Snape who pulled Madwill up and slowly dragged him out of the room.

"This is becoming too dangerous," Lucius whispered.

"I-I'm sorry..."

"What were you doing here anyway?"

"Looking for you."

"Why?"

"I just needed to talk to you."

Lucius took a deep breath, "Sit."

Hermione obeyed.

"Are you hurt?" he asked, moving to sit on the desk in front of her.

"Just a split lip and...a few bruises."

"Tell me exactly what happened."

"I already told you...we were fighting and..."

"And you ended up hitting him with..." his eyes searched the floor, "A candlestick?"

Hermione nodded, "I-I wasn't thinking."

"That much is obvious."

"I was afraid! I thought he was going to kill me and I panicked!"

"No. You were not thinking since the moment you decided to come looking for me."

Hermione took a deep breath, not knowing what else to say.

"Go back to your room. We will talk later. I need to think."

He was in a very bad mood.

Things were becoming dangerous and that was very clear to him.

"This is bad, isn't it?" she asked.

It took him a long moment to answer, "Too much is happening. I...I do not know how it will all end, Mudblood."

He was right.

People were going to die.

Hermione knew she could die.

Or Lucius could die.

It could not go on forever like this.

Hermione stood up, noticing the worry and panic on Lucius' face. And then she remembered the concern she saw in his eyes only a few minutes ago.

Concern for her.

And she knew why she decided to fake this whole thing with Madwill attacking her. It was because she knew she could count on Lucius defending her, protecting her. She would not have done it if she had any doubts.

Deciding to take a risk, she leaned over to him and placed a small kiss in the corner of his lips.

It was completely irrational and stupid and...and she did not care.

Turning around before she could see the expression on his face, she quickly left the room.

**A/N: I apologize for the wait. I am really sorry, but I had a bit of a writer's block with this story and I had too much work with my other story. Also, real life got in the way, again. I hope there are still people who read this story. **

**And regarding the story - those dungeon's are going to get crowded soon. Lucius and Hermione can't hide forever from the world. Soon, something big needs to happen. I think the end approaches. Less than ten chapters or so to go. :) Thank you!**


	20. Chapter 20

**~ chapter 20 ~**

Hermione tried to keep a calm face as he stared at her. He was not saying anything and that scared her. There was nothing in his expression that could help her understand what he was thinking. What if he was reading her mind at that very moment? What if he knew the scene with Madwill was acted out?

Hermione could feel her throat closing up with fear for her life. It had been so long since she felt something like this. Lucius would kill her if he found out she had been plotting against him all this time.

There would be no turning back.

No forgiveness.

He would kill her.

The silence was too much.

Hermione had to know.

So she opened her mouth to speak, but there was no voice. She tried again, failing miserably.

Lucius was still simply watching her, his face cold.

Finally he spoke, "I see you have calmed down."

Hermione tensed up.

Oh god.

Should she pretend to be more nervous? Should she be crying?

"Where is he?" she asked, trying to change the subject.

"How does he know about us?"

"I don't know, he didn't tell me."

"Hmm," was all he said.

Hermione felt sick to her stomach. She could not handle this. It was obvious that the life of a spy was not for her.

"Lucius," she started, "What is going on?"

Silence.

His icy eyes were digging a hole into her and she tried her best not to crumble to the floor under the weight of his gaze.

"He is in the dungeons," he finally answered.

"Is he - ?"

"Alive," he finished for her, "Although his condition is not so good. I sent Severus to check on him."

Check on him?

"You mean, _heal_ him?" Hermione asked carefully.

"Heal him just enough so that he can question him, find out how much he knows."

Hermione relaxed at that. She had Snape to help her and back her up.

So she let out a breath she'd been holding, "And you?"

"_I_ have to deal with _you_."

She nodded and then waited for him to continue.

He approached her slowly, not taking his eyes off of her. Hermione's first instinct was to take a step back, but she forced herself to remain still. He pointed at her split lip, "I can heal that for you."

She shook her head, "N-No, there is no need. We have bigger problems than that."

And with that he agreed, "What the hell were you doing out of your room? Do you have any idea the trouble we are in?" he took a deep breath, pinching the bridge of his nose.

"Lucius - "

"There are rumors."

"About us?" she asked carefully.

"About you. And about me."

_Right_, Hermione thought. He could not use the word _us_, because that would mean they were connected in some way.

"There have always been rumors," he continued, a grave expression on his face, "Ever since you came back to our world. Or even before that."

Hermione put on a brave face, "So what? What can a rumor do?"

He smirked, but there was nothing funny or positive in his smirk, "A lot more than you can imagine. A rumor, if it grows and spreads can bring down a whole empire. I have enemies. People inside my circle that want to destroy me and Severus so that they could take over. If they get enough support from others...I do not know what could happen."

Hermione was torn apart. What was it that she wanted? It used to be so simple. Her goal was to destroy the Death Eaters, to rid the world of evil, to destroy Lucius. And when it was finally close to happening, she was not sure if she wanted it to happen. Lucius was being attacked from every direction. The Resistance, the other Death Eaters, Snape, Patricia was in the dungeon, Madwill was in the dungeon. Everything was falling apart and Hermione felt as if she was falling apart as well.

She put on a cold mask and turned off all her emotions, "Patricia is not our main problem. She is a widow and plays no large role in the politics. Madwill is the one we should be worrying about. Either you erase his memories or you get rid of him. If you decide for the last, you could make it look as if it was the Resistance's work. No one must suspect you. But I would still wait for Snape and his opinion on it. He probably has a few good ideas on how to get out of this situation."

Lucius looked at her surprised, almost impressed, "Well, that was very Slytherin of you, I must say."

"Just doing what I can...to survive," she replied quietly.

After a long pause, Lucius cleared his throat, "Stay here. Do not leave the room, do you hear me? You have gotten us into enough trouble already."

Hermione nodded, noticing how he did not lock the doors after he left. It was a small thing, but it made Hermione feel less of a slave and for that she was grateful.

ooo

She was left alone until the next day. It was difficult, waiting in the silence, not knowing if something important was happening. She barely resisted the urge to call for Snape, but knew he would inform her if there was something to inform her about. Probably.

A couple of hours after the elf brought breakfast, there was finally a knock on the door.

It was not Lucius.

He would never knock. His opinion was obviously still that she did not need or deserve privacy.

"Yes?" Hermione called out, "Come in."

It was Snape. He entered the room slowly, closing the door and then he paused. It took him a couple of moments before he turned around to face her. And then Hermione noticed it. His expression.

"Is Lucius alright?"

Her question surprised him, but he decided to let it pass, "He is alright, Miss Granger."

Hermione relaxed, "Alright, then what is it?"

It did not escape her attention how he struggled with words, "I have been thinking whether or not to inform you about it. It would only distract you, but after everything you have done for us, I believe you deserve to know."

That frightened her.

"What?" she demanded, "Tell me."

"Your parents."

Two words. And it sent all her world crashing down. She leaned against the bed for support.

"What...what about my parents?" she asked, breathless.

"They have been in an accident."

Hermione waited for him to continue.

"Your father is unharmed, but you mother's condition is more serious."

"What are you saying?"

"She was in a hospital, but now she is at home, recovering."

Hermione approached him, "Who was it? Death Eaters?"

"No, it was not anything like that."

"Lucius promised me. He said he would leave the Muggle World alone," she muttered to herself, "I was stupid to ever trust him. But why my parents..."

"Miss Granger," Snape stopped her, "It had nothing to do with Lucius or Death Eaters."

She eyed him carefully, waiting for him to continue.

"It was what you call, a car accident," Snape explained.

"N-No...but...that...that does not make any sense."

"What do you mean?"

Hermione let out a nervous laugh, "It does not make any sense. All this time I've been keeping them safe from magic, from this world and now something as normal and not at all magical happened to them...a car accident...I don't...I can't believe it."

"Believe it. It had nothing to do with Death Eaters."

Hermione tried to calm herself, "Is she alright?" she looked at Snape pleadingly, "Please, tell me, she is going to be alright."

"Probably."

"Probably?" Hermione took a deep breath, "I have to see her."

"Granger - "

"I have to see her," she repeated.

"That is impossible."

"Make it possible."

"I cannot be done."

Hermione sent him a look full of rage, "I am going to see my mother. And you better make it happen or else..."

Snape raised a brow at her, "Or else what, Miss Granger?"

"Or I tell Lucius everything," her voice was shaking as she said it.

At first there was disbelief on Snape's face, but after a few moments he nodded, "All I can do is inform Lucius. It is up to him if he decides to take you to the Muggle World."

Hermione bit her lips nervously, "Alright, tell him."

"It is going to raise suspicion. He is going to wonder why I was keeping an eye on your parents."

"I don't care."

Snape nodded, "Remember - you know nothing. It is up to Lucius to tell you or not. He must not know I had talked to you first."

Hermione remained silent and Snape soon left the room.

ooo

It was the most difficult test of all. Pretending everything was alright and that she did not just found out her parents had an accident. It was later that evening when Lucius finally paid her a visit. Hermione was more than a wreck by then. She was pacing up and down, arguing with herself whether or not to go right up to Lucius and demand that he let her visit her mother. But she knew what that meant. No matter what she threatened Snape with, she could not just confess everything to Lucius.

_The greater good._

But by the time Lucius finally stood in front of her, she was shaking, even though she tried to keep calm. At least on the outside.

But as he narrowed his eyes at her, she knew she was not doing a very good job.

"What is wrong?" he simply asked, leaving no room for arguments.

Silence.

Hermione opened her mouth to reply, forced a weak smile, then simply gave up, shaking her head. It was pointless to pretend she was alright when he could clearly see right through her. Instead she tried to blame her nervousness on something else.

"Madwill," she replied, "Are there any news? What...what should we do?"

The truth was Madwill was the last thing on her mind.

Lucius let out a deep breath, "He is still where I left him. He has not gained conciousness. And I haven't had the time to deal with him just yet."

Hermione nodded, waiting for him to continue. She kept staring at him in hope that he would mention her parents. He knew. Snape had informed him.

But then why was he not saying anything?

"Are you hungry? I could order the elf to bring you dinner," he said calmly.

Hermione was falling apart on the inside. Was he planning on ignoring the news about her parents? Was he planning on hiding it from her, not even mentioning it to her?

Somehow she still managed to keep a clear head, "N-No, I'm not hungry, thank you." It came out as a whisper, she did not have the strength to speak properly.

She sat down onto the bed, turning away from Lucius.

Silence.

It hurt.

No matter how she thought they were getting closer to each other, he still did not see her as nothing more than a slave.

"I spoke with Severus."

Hermione's head snapped to his direction, waiting for his next words.

He seemed a bit uncomfortable, but he continued, "He informed me of an event. It appears that your..._parents_ got into some kind of an accident."

Hermione stood up, moving closer to him.

"Not that it is any concern of mine, but they were not seriously harmed," he spoke.

"Oh God. Please, take me to them."

His eyes widened a bit, "You cannot ask that of me."

"Please, I have to see them."

"Their life is not in any kind of danger anymore. Severus assured me of that."

Hermione approached him, "Lucius, take me to my house. I want to see my mother. I-I have to make sure she is alright."

Silence.

"She is alright," he finally spoke, almost rolling his eyes. It seemed as if he was annoyed he had to discus her family. But they why did he bring it up? He could have just remained silent about the subject.

"You cannot do this to me. You cannot tell me something like this and then refuse to let me see them," she was getting more emotional and her voice was shaking.

Lucius raised his brow at her, "I can do whatever I wish to do. You keep forgetting that, my little Mudblood."

That was it.

Hermione knew she had to leave, she had to get away from him otherwise she would do something to get her in trouble.

Like hitting him.

Without words, she walked past him into the bathroom, slamming the doors shut. She collapsed onto the floor, not even having the energy to stand.

"Do not act so childish," his voice came from the other side.

And then nothing.

He probably left.

ooo

Hermione could not tell how long it has been since she locked herself in the bathroom. Well, not really locked. There was no lock on the door. Lucius could have come in anytime he wanted. But he did not. He left.

It probably had to be past midnight when she heard a noise coming from her bedroom. Someone was there. Tensing up, she prepared herself for another fight with him, but it never came. He never came.

Silence followed and Hermione relaxed again.

The next morning, she heard a soft knock on the door and she knew it was the elf.

"I'm not hungry."

And after that she was not bothered again.

Many hours passed and she simply sat there, defeated.

What was she trying to do, anyway? Isolating herself, refusing to eat. Was it all just to force Lucius to let her see her parents? She could not answer that question. The truth was she was also disappointed. She had lived in a bubble, lying to herself that perhaps Lucius was not that bad. That her life with him had a meaning, a purpose, that perhaps she was not such a horrible person for not hating him completely.

But now...the bubble was gone.

Lucius Malfoy was an aristocratic bastard who hated Muggles and Muggleborns and he hated her parents.

He hated her parents. That was why he refused to let Hermione see them. He would rather die than set a foot in their house. They were worms to him.

Just as the dark thoughts threatened to take over completely, she heard a knock on the door. It was not as soft as before.

"I'm not hungry," she repeated the exact words from a couple of hours ago.

A knock again.

It was different.

It was only then when Hermione realized that perhaps it was not the elf.

She pulled herself up, taking a deep breath and finally opening the doors.

Lucius Malfoy stood before her, his hair in a ponytail, dressed in a large black robe.

He raised a brow at the sight of her, "I would be worried, if I had not placed the anti suicide spells on your rooms."

"You...what?" she was confused, "I would never kill myself."

"Then what were you doing in the bathroom for the last day?"

"I wanted to be alone."

"Why did you open the door?"

Hermione sighed, she was too tired to play games with him.

Just as she was about to reply, he brought his hand up, offering something to her, "Put this on."

Looking at it sceptically, she felt reassured when he nodded at her. Taking it from his hand, she realized it was a large robe.

Probably noticing the question in her eyes, he cleared his throat, "We are going out."

"Where?"

"Oh, just for a walk in the park," he rolled his eyes at her, "You know where. Put it on and restrain yourself from asking stupid questions before I change my mind."

Hermione's heart jumped.

She was going to see her parents.

ooo

Gripping his arm tightly, Hermione opened her eyes slowly when she felt the ground beneath her feet.

Oh god.

It was her backyard.

They were hidden from the public and the neighbours, protected by a large wooden fence. A small part of Hermione wondered how did he know exactly where to Apparate to not raise suspicion, but she pushed that question aside.

She was home. She was finally home.

"Are you alright?" Lucius asked, noticing the strange expression on her face.

Hermione simply nodded, letting go of his arm and making a step forward, wanting to get into the house as soon as possible, but Lucius stopped her, grabbing her elbow.

"Who is in the house?" he asked.

"I-I don't know," she shook her head, "What day it is?"

"Monday, half past six."

"My dad is probably still at work," she spoke, not even looking at Lucius, but at her house.

"That means only your mother is inside?"

"Yes, I-I guess," she tried to move again, but Lucius would not let her.

"She must not notice us. I can cast a simple charm so that she will not see us or perhaps I could Obliviate her afterwards."

"No," Hermione met his eyes, "No Obliviate. Too much of that can damage one's mind."

When he raised a brow, she explained, "The...Resistance Obliviated my parents when they came for me. I told you about that."

"Indeed," was his only response.

He pulled his wand out of his cane and cast a silent spell over them. She did not have to ask which spell it was, she trusted him.

And finally he let go of her arm.

ooo

The house was silent.

And the kitchen was exactly how she remembered it. She could almost pretend everything was back to normal.

But there was one small thing that reminded her of reality.

Lucius.

He stood beside her, watching her every movement. Why was he so tensed?

"She's probably upstairs, in the bedroom," Hermione whispered, turning around and making her way up the stairs.

Lucius followed, completely silent. Hermione could see him observing the house, looking at the pictures, his face not giving anything away. What was he thinking about? Was he disgusted that a Mudblood had a loving family? That they were happy together, probably more happy than the Malfoy family ever was?

When they finally reached the bedroom, Hermione stopped, turning around to look at him.

He understood what she was trying to ask and simply shook her head, "She will not notice you."

Hermione nodded and pushed the door open.

And then she saw her.

Her mother was in bed, sleeping. She did not seem seriously injured, there was only a small scar on her forehead, but it seemed to be healing nicely. Tears filled Hermione's eyes and she was not sure if it was from happiness or sadness. She could barely stop herself from jumping on the bed and hugging her. If she could only wake her up and hear her voice again.

Lucius stood beside her, completely silent.

And at that moment Hermione realized that Lucius Malfoy was in the same room as her mother. It should make her uncomfortable. But it did not. She was not worried or afraid.

Lucius Malfoy was in her house, in the same room as her mother, and Hermione was alright with that.

Slowly, she walked over to her sleeping mother and reached out to touch her. Was that a good idea? What if she woke her up? After a long moment, she finally moved her hand away. If she woke her up, she would panic at the sight of two strangers in her bedroom and Lucius would have to alter her memory. She did not want that for her mother.

A few long minutes passed and Hermione simply stood there, observing her mother. When did she last see her? Was it more than two months ago?

Taking a deep breath, she smiled. Her mother was fine. And so was her father. That was one thing less to worry about.

She knew it was time to say goodbye again. And that was more difficult than she thought it would be.

Finally she put on a strong face and walked back to Lucius, nodding to him.

He led her out of the room.

And then they stood in the dark hallway.

"You don't belong here," Hermione finally spoke.

"Believe me, I know," he spoke, "And I do not wish to belong in here," he looked around, a slightly disgusted grimace on his face.

Hermione turned to face him, "You are here, in my house, with my mother in the other room. You hate people like her, you kill and torture and God knows I could not stop you if you wanted to do something to her...and yet...I don't feel threatened...with you here."

Something on his face changed. It was as if her confession made him feel vulnerable. At first he was silent, but then he cleared his throat, forcing a smirk, "Then you are not very smart, are you?"

"Could you do it?" she asked, moving closer to him.

"Could I get rid of your parents?"

Hermione tensed up, waiting for his answer.

But the answer never came.

Why?

He was full of arrogance just a couple of seconds ago.

"Tell me again how the Resistance contacted you," he suddenly changed the subject.

And this time Hermione did not know what to say. Why was he asking her about it?

"I-I was in my room. It was late at night and...someone -"

"Someone?"

"Yes. A man. He suddenly appeared in my room and explained everything to me."

Lucius nodded, "Your room."

"Before we go, I would like to see it."

"We really do not have the time for - "

"I'll be quick."

Lucius let out an annoyed sigh, "Alright. Five minutes and then we are gone."

Without waiting for her reply, he moved past her, walking across the hallways directly into her room. Hermione froze with shock. After a long moment she finally followed him.

When she entered the room, she did notice all her things were gone. Her room was now what it appeared to be a guest room. But that was not what caught Hermione's attention.

"Lucius?" she whispered, making him look at her, "How did you know where my room is?"

She could see the panic in his eyes before he quickly covered it with arrogance, "I assumed it was here. There was only one door left and - "

Cutting him off, she shook her head, "Don't lie. You knew exactly where my room is. You were here before."

He was silent.

Hermione approached him, "You were here before."

And suddenly it all made sense to her.

"W-We have had this conversation before. I told you about...flashbacks. I told you I remember seeing you in my bedroom when I was here and you denied it. But you were here, weren't you?"

He remained silent.

But his silence was a good enough answer.

Hermione stared at him, "What...what were you doing here? Were you stalking me? How many times were you here? Every night? Were you watching me sleep? I remember...I remember your scent in my room in the mornings and I thought I was going insane. But I wasn't. You were here."

"Mudblood - "

"You were here, in my bedroom, at night...and then you, what, erased my memory?" her eyes widened in panic, "You didn't..._we_ didn't, you _know_ - "

"Of course not. Calm yourself, you were never touched. Not like that."

But that did not help her relax, "Why? Why were you here?"

"I do not owe you an explanation."

She could not believe him, "Yes, yes, you do."

"And why is that?"

He could never admit he was wrong.

"You would never stalk me if I was just another Mudblood. If I was just another slave. You would not lose your time visiting the Muggle world, Muggle house."

Lucius smirked weakly, "I believe we have already discussed this."

"Discussed what?"

"That you are not just another Mudblood," he said quietly.

And that left her without words.

She had to sit down. Walking over to the bed, she simply collapsed down, not knowing what to say. Lucius soon followed. He sat beside her, letting out a deep breath.

"Could we...just stay here?" Hermione whispered, "No one knows we are here. There are no problems here. No Patricia, no Madwill. No Death Eaters."

He said nothing, he simply leaned back against the bed frame. It was dark, but Hermione could see he was tired. Truly tired. And then she decided to take a risk and she leaned back, resting against his chest. At first he tensed up, as he did always when there was physical contact between the two of them and it did not involve sex. But he did not say anything or push her away.

And they stayed like that.

Until finally he spoke, "You found out about your mother's accident from me, is that correct?"

"Yes."

Silence.

"Hmm," he wrapped his arms around her waist and rested his chin on her head, "I never said your mother was at home."

Hermione froze. She could swear her heart stopped for a moment.

Their conversation came back to her.

_"Not that it is any concern of mine, but they were not seriously harmed," he spoke._

_"Please, take me to them."_

_His eyes widened a bit, "You cannot ask that of me."_

_"Please, I have to see them."_

_"Their life is not in any kind of danger anymore. Severus assured me of that."_

_Hermione approached him, "Lucius, take me to my house. I want to see my mother. I-I have to make sure she is alright."_

Oh God.

What could she say? How could she explain that?

Lucius was silent.

He did not demand explanation.

He knew.

Perhaps it was not the best idea, but she remained silent. There was nothing to say. She would have to face the consequences soon. But not yet.

This night was different.

They could both be quiet and it was alright.

Problems could wait until morning.

**A/N: I am ashamed. And I apologize. I am trying to finish this story and this is the start of Lucius finding out about Hermione's double life. **


	21. No More Secrets

**Chapter 21**

**No more secrets **

Hermione was afraid to open her eyes. She had been awake for a few minutes already, thinking about the events from the previous day. She knew she was in trouble. She made a mistake. In front of Lucius. She was so careless. And that mistake might cost her her life. What could she say to explain herself? How could she explain how she knew her mother was at home and not in a hospital?

She was alone in bed. That much she could tell. The last thing she remembered was falling asleep against Lucius' chest, feeling his heartbeat and wondering why wasn't he questioning her right there and then.

He didn't.

He did not demand any kind of explanation.

Slowly Hermione opened her eyes, noticing him immediately.

He was standing next to the window, observing something. He seemed lost in his thoughts and did not even notice she was already awake.

Taking a deep breath, she called out his name.

He turned to look at her, but did not say anything for a very long time.

He was looking at her strangely, that much she could tell. Any kind of hope she had about him forgetting the last night's mistake, went flying out of the window.

Finally he spoke, "Your father left a few minutes ago with that strange device for transportation."

"His car," she nodded, "Yes, he's...he's off to work."

Lucius raised his eyebrows in slight interest, "Where does he work at?"

"He's a dentist."

Noticing the confusion in his eyes, she quickly added, "He takes care of people's teeth."

He grimaced, "Is that considered a respected profession?"

"I..I don't know. I guess."

Looking around, he asked, "And how much does he earn? The house is quite large, although not very tastefully decorated."

Hermione could imagine that her house might seem funny compared to the Malfoy Manor.

"He earns enough for us to live normally," then she corrected herself, "For _them_ to live normally, I mean."

Being at home, Hermione almost forgot she did not live there anymore. She was not a part of that family anymore.

"And your mother? Does she work too?" Lucius asked calmly.

"She's a dentist also."

"Interesting."

_Where is he going with this_, Hermione thought. Why the sudden interest in her family? It actually made her kind of uncomfortable.

Silence followed.

Finally she decided to move, getting up from the bed and then she simply stood there, waiting for him to speak.

Was he doing this on purpose? Dragging it out, torturing her with silence?

She decided to attack him first.

"Lucius," she started, "How many times did you visit me when I was back in this world?"

He tensed up and it took him a few long moments before he could answer, "A few times."

"A few?"

"Yes."

"And then you simply...deleted my memory?"

He shook his head, "No. That happened only once. Because you noticed me."

"All the other times..."

"You did not know I was here," he finished for her.

Hermione looked up at him, "I knew."

Seeing the confused expression on his face, she continued, "Not_ knew knew._ But...I could sense you here. I had a feeling someone was in the dark corner of the room, watching me."

His tone was calm as he spoke, "Why did you not check if someone was really there?"

Silence.

Hermione turned away from him, biting her lip nervously, "I-I was afraid."

"You are lying."

"I'm not."

"You are telling me you are afraid of the dark? Of possible monsters in the dark?" he let out a short laugh, "A girl who was blind for months, who lived in the darkness...and now suddenly she is afraid of the dark? I do not believe it."

"Not the darkness," she corrected him, turning around to face him, "I was afraid of...checking and realizing...there was no one. That I was actually alone in the room."

He did not expect that. Perhaps it was a bit too much for him, because he cleared his throat and took a small step back.

Why could he not admit there was something between them? Why else would he be visiting her? Every time Hermione got closer to him in an emotional way, he moved away, never letting her get too close. Him keeping her at arms length was starting to get on her nerves, especially when it was obvious there was something more about their whole situation.

"Mudblood," he finally started, and now his voice was really cold, "I am going to ask you this once. And you better have an explanation I will believe."

She tensed up. She knew exactly what his next question would be.

"How did you know your mother was at home?"

She could try the 'you told me that' trick, but she doubted he would fall for it.

Opening and closing her mouth a few times, she realized she had no idea what to say. And with every passing second she was more and more suspicious in his eyes.

She could literally see his glare becoming colder. He was slowly turning from her Lucius to a normal Death Eater. And ... Did she just think of him as _her _Lucius?

"I-I guessed," Hermione finally spoke, but not even she herself believed it.

"You _guessed_?"

"Yes."

Silence.

This was bad.

"You did not guess," he said causally.

Hermione could feel her heart beating uncontrollably. And she found herself wondering if this was the end of her spying career.

"Someone told you," Lucius continued, "Which means you have contact with someone outside the Manor. Which means you have been hiding that from me. Which means you are still connected to the Resistance."

Oh God.

"Which means," he says, "You have been lying to me all this time. Probably working against me."

Hermione shook her head, "No - "

"What is it? What do you provide them with? Information?" he continues, his tone even and cold, "How are you communicating with them?"

"I-I'm not. Lucius, you need to believe me."

"And why would I do that?"

"Because - "

"For all I know, you have been lying to me all this time," then he slowly realized it, "Is that the reason you came back? Was your capture planned?"

"I'm not working for the Resistance!"

He sighed, "That is not even a question anymore. We are past that. The question is, how are you communicating with them?"

"I swear!" she cried out, "I-I am not working against you!"

"I do not want to resort to drastic measures."

Hermione took a step back, "What do you mean?"

Silence.

No words left his mouth. He simply looked around then back at Hermione and she realized what he meant.

"Are you threatening me? M-My parents?"

"Why not?"

"Lucius, you need to calm down and listen to what I am saying."

He turned to look through the window again, "You were the only thing in this world that I thought I knew. That I could...trust."

Hermione's throat closed up with fear and hurt. Was she really the only one he trusted?

Lucius continued, "However, I have no mercy for people who lie to me."

She remained silent. Her head, that was once full of ideas, was now empty. She could not think of an excuse that could save her.

He suddenly cleared his throat and looked at her, "We are going back to the Manor. And there you will tell me everything."

Without waiting for her reply, he grabbed her arm roughly and they disappeared.

ooo

Once they reached the Manor, Lucius dropped her in her room and then left, not even saying anything. Hermione's first reaction was to contact Snape, but then she stopped herself. What if that was exactly what Lucius wanted her to do? Contact her source?

No, she couldn't do that. At that moment Lucius did not suspect Snape of anything and she could not be responsible for blowing his cover.

She sat on the bed, the dead silence of the room finally hitting her hard. She was alone. She did not even have Lucius anymore. He would dispose of her. It was only a matter of time. He did not forgive betrayal.

Was there any way she could still make him believe her?

What could she say?

_Think, Hermione, think!_

She could still remember the days when she was nothing more than a slave in the Malfoy Manor. Although that was only a few months ago, it seemed like a lifetime.

She remembered when she had to sleep on the floor beside Lucius' bed. And when she was starving, but because of her inappropriate behaviour he would not give her food.

Simply the memory of those times made her shiver in disgust.

She never thought things could go back to the way they were, but now she was not so sure anymore. If she was not careful, she could be sharing the dungeon with Patricia very soon.

ooo

When he finally visited her it was already becoming dark outside. Why leave her alone for the whole day? Did he have work do to or was he giving her time to rethink her loyalty?

Closing the doors behind him, he leaned against the wall, crossing his arms over his chest. And then he waited.

And Hermione waited as well.

"Is that your final answer?" he suddenly asked.

"What?"

"Silence," he replied, "Is that your final answer?"

Hermione took a deep breath, "I...Whatever I say, you will not believe me."

"You do realize what is going to happen to you?"

That was a threat. Hermione was not dumb.

"Lucius..." she started slowly, "Do what you need to do."

For a long moment he simply stared at her and it seemed as if he was disappointed by her answer. It was as if he wanted her to fight back, to defend herself, to say something, _anything_.

_Perhaps this is the end_, Hermione thought. The whole situation with her and Lucius and the Resistance and the spying...it could not last forever. Something had to happen.

Lucius cleared his throat, "Very well. You will be treated as any other slave accused of betrayal."

"What does that mean?"

"I cannot keep breaking rules for you. This ends here."

All the air seemed to leave the room and Hermione started to feel light-headed. She feared what his next words would be.

"You will be transferred into the dungeon where you will be interrogated."

"By who?"

"We have people for that."

Hermione started to back away from him even though there was no where she could hide.

"No, no, you don't want to do that," she tried to reason with him, "Look, I - "

"Do not make this any harder," he spoke, his tone cold, "For now, you will be escorted to my dungeon. In a few days you will probably get transferred to the main - "

"Stop it! What is the real reason you are doing this? Why do you want to get rid of me?"

He ignored that, "I have yet to inform the head of our department about this situation. I will do so tomorrow morning," he then extended his arm towards her, "Come with me."

Hermione shook her head.

"Mudblood, I would rather you do this willingly. I am not in the mood for violence."

Neither was she.

There was no getting through to him, she could see that. Not at that moment, anyway.

"Fine," she finally moved, walking to him.

In silence he led her downstairs.

Underground.

Where the dungeons were.

A chill went through her as she realized what was underneath the Malfoy Manor. How many people have died there? How many people were there at that exact moment?

Such silence.

As Lucius pushed her into one small room, she stopped him with a question before he could leave.

"Is Patricia also in one of these dungeons?"

"Do not worry yourself with her," was his only response before he quickly left.

Hermione stood there for a few long minutes, simply staring at the doors, expecting and hoping he would come back.

But he didn't.

Slowly she turned around, finally seeing her new home.

No windows.

Just a filthy mattress on the ground.

In one corner there was a small hole on the ground. Hermione approached it and realized what it was.

"No more luxurious bathrooms, I guess," she said out loud, trying to keep herself from panicking.

As she sat down onto the mattress, she realized she truly was in big trouble.

There was no coming back from this.

ooo

Her stomach was complaining loudly. She was so hungry it was painful. And she was unbelievably thirsty. Her lips were completely dry.

It's been quite a while since she last saw him. A day, perhaps two? No one has visited her in that time. Not even an elf to bring her food. What was his plan? Leaving her in the dungeon to starve?

Her mind was a wreck. She kept changing her mind about whether or not to call Snape.

_Does he know what's happening?_

But at the end she always chose not to risk it. Even if Snape knew, what could he do to help her?

When the dungeon doors finally opened, Hermione did not even bother getting up.

It was him. As expected.

Hermione took one look at him and she knew something had happened.

He avoided eye contact with her, for a very long moment he stared at one spot on the floor, remaining silent.

"What's wrong?" she asked, not actually wanting to hear the answer.

Not answering, he simply looked around and then pulled his wand out. Hermione flinched immediately, but forced herself to remain where she was.

"Get up," his voice was weak.

"Why?" she demanded, "Is this the start of the interrogation?"

"Get up," he repeated, still not looking at her.

Hermione put on a brave face and pulled herself up, staring at him in defiance.

He pointed his wand at her and Hermione expected a curse to hit her, but instead the mattress behind her changed into a chair. She could not prevent the look of confusion on her face. But before she had a chance to ask about it, Lucius walked by her and sat on the chair, again ignoring her completely.

"What's going on?" Hermione demanded again.

Whatever it was, it was obviously not good. Or perhaps it was. Whatever happened that put Lucius in a bad mood, was a good thing, right? Whatever was bad for him, was good for her. Or at least, that was how it was supposed to be.

"Everything is falling apart," he spoke, staring off into the distance.

"What do you mean?"

"Everything."

"What happened?"

"There was an attack. This morning. Many of my colleagues were killed."

Hermione tensed up, "Who did it?"

"What do you think?" he asked, his eyes finally meeting hers.

"The Resistance," it was obvious.

He nodded, "The Resistance. They are getting stronger and somehow always one step ahead of us. They know exactly when to attack, who to attack. This was not random attack. It was planned. Do you know who got killed?"

Hermione shook her head no, waiting for him to continue.

"A few of my best men. Those who were in high places. Not some ordinary Death Eaters."

What was she expected to say? That she was sorry? How did he expect her to react?

"There is chaos outside. People are rebelling. My followers are rebelling against me. It would appear they do not trust my leadership. I left Severus to deal with it and I ... came here."

"Why?" Hermione asked quietly, "I can't help you."

"Mudblood... If I am going down, then you are going down too."

A strange sensation washed over her. She knew he was right. But that fact did not scare her as it should.

"Why would you be going down?" she approached him, "Is it that serious?"

"Constant attacks. From every side. The Resistance, the followers..._you_. I don't see...the point."

This was not the Lucius she was used to. What happened to him?

"Lucius," she started slowly, "Are you saying you...don't want to do this anymore?"

"Do what?"

"This life."

His eyes got cold, "Do not get your hopes up. I am not turning into someone who suddenly loves Mudbloods and Muggles."

"I'm not saying you are. But...do you still wish to live this life? What is the point of it all, Lucius? What are your goals? What is the first thing on your mind when you wake up in the morning?"

He looked at her.

It was only that.

A look.

"No, no, no!" she grimaced, "You can't do this to me!"

"Do what exactly?"

"This! Look around! I'm in a dungeon! You've left me here for two days, no food, no water and now you just come here and start declaring, whatever it is that you are declaring to me!"

"Do not act as if all of this is my fault."

Hermione forced a laugh, "Excuse me? Need I remind you how it all started? It was you who chose me as your reward, it was you who took me away from the Battlefield and brought me here. I didn't even know who you are!"

He stood up, his expression a mixture of anger and darkness, "Do not act so innocent. It was you who started playing mind games with me, trying to convince me you were my equal, that your blood was not filthy and unworthy."

"Because that is the truth! And what mind games? You are seriously delusional if you believe that _I_ was the one playing mind games."

He laughed.

He actually laughed.

And it angered her, "You are a sadist, Lucius. Do you remember? Using a cutting curse on me? Bringing me into a room full of Death Eaters as an entertainment? And saying all I had to do was beg you to help me and you could make it all stop? And then you wanted me to thank you. Do you remember leaving me with Dolohov? I thought I was going to die. And your biggest mind game ever! Forcing me to sleep with you, but making it seem it was my choice. Do you realize how you messed with my head?"

"Everything was simple before you came into my life," he spoke quietly, "I curse the day I met you."

"What have I ever done to you?"

His glare was murderous, "Are you saying this was all my fault? That you are the innocent victim and I am the monster?"

Hermione opened her mouth to speak, but then she simply shook her head, searching for words, "I have made mistakes too. I should have stopped you. But instead I let you in. And now we are here."

Silence.

"I despise you," he whispered.

"And I despise you," was her reply.

Their eyes met and suddenly he was next to her, grabbing her and kissing her roughly. Hermione groaned into the kiss, her body responding to it. Her hands wrapped around his neck and he pushed her back until they reached a wall. All the anger turned into passion, the kiss was violent, his hands were everywhere on her body. Hermione pushed the robes down his shoulders and started undoing the buttons on his shirt and then her eyes suddenly flew open.

"No!" pushing his away with all her strength, she wiped her lips with her hand, "We are not doing this!"

He stood still, breathless and stared at her.

"I am not your _sex toy_! We need to discuss what is this that we have!" her voice was shaking, but she could not remember the last time she was so determined about something.

"What do you think this is? Love?" he mocked, "Do you think I can change sides and we can get married and live happily ever after?"

His words hurt, "No, of course not. But it can't continue like this. Not anymore."

Silence.

Lucius shook his head, but said nothing.

"Leave," Hermione pointed towards the door, "And when you decide what is it that you want...then you can come back."

"Mudblood - "

"Either you kill me and continue with your pathetic excuse for a life, hunting_ Mudbloods_, killing and torturing people until you die old and alone or until someone kills you...or...you choose the right thing."

"You are crazy if you think - "

Hermione continued, "And surrender to the Resistance. And help them bring the rest of the Death Eaters down."

Lucius' eyes turned cold, "So you admit it? You admit that you are connected to the Resistance?"

Hermione shrugged, not having the strength to pretend anymore, "You already knew that, Lucius."

He did not react.

"Make your choice," she spoke quietly, "What do you want to do with yourself, with _us_?"

When she finished talking, she turned her head away, blinking back the tears.

And then she heard him leave.

**A/N: It's slowly coming to an end. I admit, I still don't know how to finish it! I would like to hear your opinion on the matter. ;) It is going to be difficult saying goodbye forever to Lucius and Hermione. Thank you all for reading!**


	22. Chapter 22

**Chapter 22**

_"On your knees."_

_"No."_

_"I will not repeat myself."_

_"Why did you bring me here? What do you want with me?"_

_Suddenly she felt her knees being forced down and she fell onto the floor with a loud thud. Crying out, she tried to get back up, but an invisible force was forcing her down. Not being able to see anything, she had trouble keeping her balance and had to use her arms to support herself. This was not a position she ever wanted to be in, especially not in front of Lucius Malfoy._

_"See?" he spoke coldly, "This is where you belong. And I am going to teach you that, girl."_

_"Why are you doing this? Why me? I-I don't want to be here, just - "_

_"What?" he cut her off, "Do you wish to go back to the Battle field? It's been two days since the end of the War, but there are still horrible things happening there. You do not want to see that," then he chuckled, "Oh, but you cannot see anything, can you?"_

_Hermione almost let out a cry. She needed her sight back, she was almost willing to beg him to help her. The darkness was driving her mad._

_"You should be grateful I brought you here," Lucius continued, then his tone got a playful tone, "You should thank me."_

_Silence._

_"I was being serious, Mudblood."_

_Hermione looked up in the direction of his voice, "W-What?"_

_"Thank me for bringing you here. It's the least you can do."_

_"What? No!"_

_"Either you do as I say or I torture you with the Cruciatus Curse. I have heard you are a fairly reasonable girl."_

_Hermione wanted to cry so much at that moment. She was not ready for this. Why couldn't she just die? Why didn't she die with her friends? What was the point in surviving if this was her life now?_

_"Well, Mudblood?"_

_A few long hours later, or perhaps it was just minutes, Hermione actually started thinking of ways to end her life. She could drown herself in the bathtub, or perhaps she could hit her head really hard against the wall, or - ?_

_"Have you changed your mind?" Lucius sounded bored._

_Hermione could feel the blood in her mouth, she bit her tongue during one of the Crucio attacks. Shaking her head no, she could not prevent the tears from spilling down her cheeks, but she wiped them away furiously. But then a small voice inside her head started to whisper horrible things. Why was she fighting him? She had lost everything already? What was she fighting for? The good side lost the war. Complying with his wishes would mean the end of pain. But would it? Would he really stop torturing her if she did what he asked?_

_Suddenly she could feel the air change. She could feel a presence next to her._

_And then he spoke, "No one will know. Simply thank me and I will leave you alone."_

_He was kneeling down next to her and Hermione could smell him. All she wanted was to crawl away from him, but there was no way she could hide from him. And her body hurt so much._

_She did however flinch when he brushed a stray of hair from her face. He immediately removed his hand._

_"Well?"_

_Hermione remained silent._

_"Do the right thing."_

_"T-Thank ..."_

_"Yes?"_

_She could hear it in his tone. He was pleased. He was enjoying this so much. Even though she could not see it, she could imagine a sick smirk on his face._

_"Will you stop?" she forced herself to ask, "When I thank you...will you stop?"_

_"I give you my word," he drawled, but Hermione could hear the mocking in his voice._

_He was lying and he wasn't even trying to cover it._

_"Thank you."_

_The words were spoken quickly and quietly._

_"You are thanking me for what?"_

_Of course._

_Hermione took a deep breath, "Thank you, Mr. Malfoy, for taking me away from the Battle field and bringing me into your luxurious Manor."_

_"Now you have taken it a step too far. I can hear the sarcasm in your voice."_

_A desperate cry escaped her, but then she heard him get up and walk away from her._

_"But," he said, "You are welcome."_

_"Wait!" she called after him, her eyes blinking furiously._

_He said nothing, but she knew he was waiting for her to continue._

_"What...what are you going to do with me? How long am I going to s-stay here?"_

_And then his laugh. Cold. Merciless._

_"Oh, and where exactly do you think you are going?" he asked, clearly amused._

_No. He couldn't possibly mean... why would he keep her at his house forever? Hermione was positive he would either kill her as soon as possible or hand her over to someone. But why keep her?_

_"You are never leaving. Your life is going to change, Mudblood."_

_And then the doors closed._

OOO

_I am going to call Snape. This is too much. I need to know what is going on!_

Hermione looked at the bracelet he had given her at the start of her spying career. She had not used it that much, only when it really was an emergency.

And just as she was about to call for him, the large wooden door burst open. And there he was.

Severus Snape.

Hermione could not hide her surprise, "Well, that was fast."

"Excuse me?"

"I-I was just about to call for you."

Snape looked alarmed, "Come, there is not much time."

"Why? What's happening?"

He did not answer, he simply grabbed her arm and almost dragged her out of the dungeon. Hermione knew something seriously bad was happening. Escaping from his forceful grip, she stopped walking, refusing to move.

"Tell me what is going on."

Snape looked annoyed, but seeing her determined expression, he gave in, "I need to get you out of here. The Manor is about to be attacked."

"What? The Resistance?"

"Yes. The Malfoy Manor. This is the last."

"The last what?"

"The only Death Eater's house that has not yet been taken down."

He gave her a few seconds for that to sink in.

"It's...it's happening?" Hermione finally asked.

"Not only that, Miss Granger. It is almost done. The control of the Wizarding World is again in our hands. We have taken over the Ministry, the Azkaban and - "

"Where's Lucius?"

Snape did not even try to hide the surprise on his face, "Why is that important, Miss Granger?"

"Where is he?" she raised her voice.

Silence.

Hermione could feel herself trembling, "What are you not telling me?"

"We should go. It is not safe."

"What do you mean it's not safe? The Resistance is good, they wouldn't do anything to us!"

"You need to realize that these attacks are dangerous. Sometimes, in battle, people are not very careful with who they have on the other end of the wand," he spoke slowly and calmly.

"You mean they are just going to set this whole place on fire, not caring who is in the house?"

It was not meant to be taken seriously, but her former teacher said nothing to object.

"Where's Lucius?" she demanded.

"Miss Granger, come with me. We have to leave."

"No!" Hermione raised her voice, "What are you hiding from me? I deserve to know!"

Snape let out a sigh, "Lucius is in his study room."

_What is he doing in his study room?_

"Does he know what is happening? Does he know he's in danger?" she asked, but got no answer.

Without thinking, she ran past Snape, down the long dark hallway, up the stairs, to the place where she knew she would find him.

Pushing the door open, she was struck with the silence in the room. Complete silence.

It took her a few moments to finally notice him. He was sitting in an armchair, next to the fireplace, looking completely relaxed. There was a glass of something in his hands, Hermione suspected it was alcohol.

"Lucius."

He looked at her, but did not seem surprised to see her.

Taking a few steps closer, she did not fail to notice he was dressed as if he was going somewhere or meeting very important people. Classy and elegant. His hair was in a ponytail. He even had his snake-headed walking stick beside him.

"Lucius," she tried again.

"You should leave."

"What?"

"Did Severus not get to you?"

"He did...wait, did you send him?"

At that moment she heard someone else enter the room. Turning around, she noticed Snape, looking a bit alarmed.

"She refused to leave with me," he said to Lucius.

"I understand."

"Perhaps you could - "

"Stop!" Hermione screamed, "Stop having a conversation as if I am not here! What is going on?"

Lucius finally forced himself to look at her, "I _know_, Mudblood."

"Know what?"

"Everything," Snape answered, moving closer to Hermione, "About you, about me, the Resistance."

"H-How?"

"Severus came earlier today to inform me," Lucius spoke calmly.

Hermione turned to look at her former teacher, "Why would you do that? You gave him the opportunity to escape."

"I did."

"Why?" she could not believe what was happening. Finally all the cards were on the table.

"Regardless of everything, his past, his sins, Lucius and I have a history. And regardless of what he thinks of me now, we were friends for more than two decades."

Lucius kept staring at the glass in his hand, his face not betraying any emotion.

Snape continued, "Also, you asked me a favor, Miss Granger."

"I-I asked for Lucius to be safe, but you said you couldn't guarantee anything."

He nodded, "That is true. When the attack happens, there will not be justice, there will be revenge."

Hermione's throat closed up, "That's not..."

What could she say? Fair? Lucius Malfoy and the other Death Eaters killed so many people, fathers, mothers, sons, daughters, husbands ... How could she demand justice from those who were left behind and lost their family members?

She turned to Lucius, "If you stay here, you die."

He did not seem to be affected by that.

"Lucius! You are going to die!"

Finally he met her eyes.

"I know," he spoke.

Such a simple sentence.

"And that's it?" Hermione could not believe it, "You are going to sit here until they come and kill you?"

"Of course not," he replied, "I am going to fight them."

"And you are going to lose."

"I know."

Silence.

Hermione could not remember the last time she had a panic attack, but she was pretty sure she was starting to have one at that very moment. Running over to Lucius, she grabbed his arm, trying to pull him out of the armchair, trying to force him to stand up.

It was pointless.

She slipped and fell onto the floor.

Pathetic.

Standing up, she blinked the tears away, "Lucius, get up."

"Severus, take her away," he simply spoke, completely ignoring her.

"Get up!" she screamed at him, "You are not dying here. Not like this. You are not dying!"

"Mudblood. This is my Manor. I am not leaving."

"Yes, you are!"

And then he laughed, but it was fake, she could see it, "Do you hear yourself, Mudblood? This is your chance to see me pay for everything I have done. To finally have your revenge. To finally be rid of me."

"Not here. And not like this. If anything, I want to you have a fair trial and go to Azkaban."

He smirked, "You know that is not going to happen."

"I am not going to let you die."

"Severus, take her away from here."

Just as Snape took a step towards her, she raised her hand up to stop him, "Don't come any closer! I will not leave without him!"

Suddenly Lucius stood up, "Do you hear yourself? What do you want from me? What do you think there is between us?"

"I don't know. A-And I am not going to find out if you get killed today."

They stared at each other and it seemed as if time stopped. Neither of them wanted to give in, they were both too stubborn.

And then they heard it. An explosion.

"We have to leave now," there was panic in Snape's voice.

Shaking her head, Hermione stood beside Lucius, "No. I-I'll make sure you get a fair trial and - "

"Don't be an idiot," he cut her off, "There will be no trial. They are after blood. Just like we were."

She looked at Snape desperately, a question burning in her eyes. He simply nodded, "Lucius's right."

This was all wrong. It was not supposed to be like that. No one should be afraid of the good side, of the Order. When did they turn into murderers? Has it truly come this far? Now she would have to hide from the good side?

"I must not be seen here with you," Snape explained, extending his arm towards Hermione, "This is your last chance. Come with me."

Hermione stared at him, a part of her wanting to go, but she could not move. She had to stay.

Snape said nothing, he simply nodded his head in mild understanding. And the next moment he was gone.

"What the hell are you doing, you foolish girl?" Lucius snapped, "Suddenly you are concerned for my well being? After all these months of working against me?"

"You are not going to die here today!"

"And you _are_, if you do not leave right now."

"No."

Lucius grabbed her arm, "What do you want from me?"

"You owe me!" she screamed, "I will not let you take the easy way out! You owe me _so much,_ Lucius!"

And then the doors burst open.

The study room was soon filled with screams, curses. Hermione was pushed aside and into the wall as she watched Lucius pull his wand out. He could try to fight, but she knew it was pointless. There were three men, they were all pointing their wands at the same person. Lucius Malfioy.

The first man attacked, sending a curse, but Lucius deflected it. But he was too slow for the second curse. It hit him in the shoulder and he cried out with pain, but kept fighting.

"Stop," Hermione whispered.

_They are going to kill him. Lucius is going to die._

She had nothing to defend herself with. Nothing. All she could do was stand there and watch.

"Stop!" she screamed, anger taking over her and then it felt as if she was in a bubble and that bubble exploded.

Hermione watched in slow motion how all four men in the room were pushed back against the wall by some invisible force. They all lost conciousness.

And then there was silence.

It took Hermione a few moments to collect her thoughts and force herself to move. She ran to Lucius who was on the ground, but at least he was moving, blinking and coughing. The other men were still out of it.

"L-Lucius? Are you alright?"

"What...what did you do?" he asked, shock evident on his face.

"I don't know. W-Was it me?"

"I did not do it. Neither did they. It was you."

Hermione wished he would stop looking at her like that.

Picking up a wand that was on the floor, she handed it to him, "Leave!"

"Mudblood - "

"Leave now. There are others in the Manor, they'll be here any second!"

Without waiting for his reply, she helped him get up and then backed away.

Without saying anything, they looked at each other, realizing they might never see each other again. This could be the end. He could get killed. She could get killed.

They stared at each other until he finally disapparated.

He left the Malfoy Manor.

**A/N: I knooooow. I don't know what happened. I simply lost all motivation. I had no idea where I was going with this story. I am still not sure, but I'll try to finish it. Sorry for the long wait! :/**


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